Ed, Edd, Eddy n Edna
by Technomaru
Summary: In this Non-supernatural spin-off of "The Grim ED-ventures of Ed, Edd, n Eddy"... What if Edna existed in the "Ed, Edd n Eddy" canon as Nazz's Cousin? Stuff will happen! Now re-introducing the male Eds' girlfriends The Kimono Sisters! Please review!
1. Day of the Fourth Ed!

**Ed, Edd, Eddy, n Edna**

By Winter Knight

Chapter 1: "Day of the Fourth Ed!"

Note: I do not own Ed, Edd, n Eddy...but "The Fourth Ed" is mine!

This is a spin-off of "The Grim ED-ventures of Ed, Edd, n Eddy". I always wondered what if Edna existed in the "Ed, Edd, n Eddy" canon and...THIS STORY DOES NOT CONTAIN SUPERNATURAL ELEMENTS...nor supernatural elephants so those ghost mammoths will have to go! YOU TOO FRED FREDBURGER!

long story short, if "The Grim ED-ventures of Ed, Edd, n Eddy" is "Ge Ge Ge no Kitaro", then this story is "Hakaba Kitaro" but without the scary stuff. Also I wanted to introduce Edna in a proper "in-canon" way... But she is still caulrophobic!

Apparently, it seems that according to , Edna is Erin Fitzgerald's favorite EEnE OC and she voiced Nazz and May Kanker!

I got the idea of Edna when I introduced her in "The Grim ED-ventures of Ed, Edd, n Eddy" chapter 49. I always wondered if there was EVER a fourth Ed... what if it happens to be a female? Also I noticed the show lacks any positive female characters so this was my responce. I also got a epic win from Erin Fitzgerald when I told her I noticed that! Also Edna is supposed to resemble "Ugly Betty" Suarez because... well... Ugly Betty was popular around the time I created her!

This is a sneak peak, if anyone likes this story, let me know! btw the story is supposed to be released when the movie comes out.

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It was a hot August day in the Cul-De-Sac, Ed and Double D are just eating watermelons in Ed's house but then Eddy shows up with a perverted grin on his face and then says "Check out what I bought on Ebay with all the money we made from the "Devil Fruit Scam"! A fanmade videotape entitled "Sexy Sirens of Sci-Fi and Horror Revealed! Volume 4" two hours of film clips featuring scream queens, B-movie starlets, and even some real actressess in movies where they are topless...OR WORSE!!!" It even has Calisto, Tasha Yar, and half the cast of "Twin Peaks"..." Eddy is drooling in excessive amounts as he is saying this.

Double D and Ed just look at Eddy angerly. Double D then says "Eddy you just sank to a new low..." Ed then says "I always thought you were a pervert but that tops the gravy!" Eddy then says "Oh who's gonna know? It's gonna be a stag party for us! and besides...it has Tasha Yar naked! You like Star Trek, don't ya Ed?" Ed then grins and says "BEAM ME UP EDDY...but isn't seeing Tasha Yar naked against the prime directive?" Double D then then thinks to himself "I'll just humor Eddy... he's a sad strange little man!"

Eddy is then about to put the tape on the VCR and says "Gentleman...Behold!" Ed then says "Cool! is it the "Rabbot"?" Eddy then says "No Ed, I'm not Dr. Weird... You're Dr. Weird!...Now get ready for two hours of Double Ds...not you of course Double D!" As Eddy puts on the videotape, Eddy leers pervertedly as Ed watches along with him and Double D yawns...

But to Eddy's horror the videotape actually starts playing episodes of "Help! It's the Hair Bear Bunch!"

Double D says in mock-shock "Oh my! That's not Tasha Yar naked! it's the Hair Bear Bunch!" Double D starts laughing as Ed says "Bidibidibidi...you got hosed Buck!" Eddy angerly looks at Double D as he says "I guess Eddy learned what "Karma" means when he was scammed into buying that videotape online." Eddy grabs Double D and Ed by the neck and says "I'LL RIP YOUR KARMA CHAMELEON HEADS OFF!" Eddy then starts beating up Double D and Ed and when Ed gets punched on the stomach he kept saying "Hello Light! Hello Light!"

Nazz just opens the door and to her suprise she sees Eddy fighting with the other Eds. Then she pulls out a spray bottle and sprays Eddy with it till he stops fighting. The three are nervous by Nazz's sudden appearance and she says, "Hi guys, I want you to meet my Cousin, she just moved into the neighborhood and she needs some friends to help her out.

Double D seems confused and says, "But Nazz, we're not how you say "popular" why would your cousin want to hang out with us?" Nazz then says, "Simple Double D... she's also...A ED!"

Eddy then gulps and says, "Did you just say "She" and "also a Ed" in the same sentance?" Nazz then says, "Yep I did...and here she is! now play nice you three!" Nazz then winks at the three and says, "This is my cousin... EDNA!" As Nazz walks away, out comes a young hispanic girl their age sporting thick-framed eyeglasses a prominent set of braces, having long black hair and she's wearing a blue dress and sandals.

Then Edna slowly extends her hand and says to Double D in a calm soft voice, "Hello, I just moved to the neighborhood and I've heard so much about you boys according to Cousin Nazz... also she tells me you three scam anyone in your sights... plus the one who was beating you up is said to be a bit of a perv." Eddy wakes up and says "THAT'S MEGA-PERV YOU...you... say you are new around here..wanna" Before Eddy can finish, Edna throws a issue of Maxim into the face of a rather happy Eddy. Edna then says, "Cousin Nazz supplied me with that just to distract Eddy." Double D then says "Yeah, you didn't introduce yourself...umm..."

Edna then properly introduces herself, "The name is...EDNA... pleasure to meet you Double D" Ed then says "I am Ed...welcome to my basement!" Edna notices what was on TV and then she giggles. Double D then says "Umm do you find anything funny with "the Hair Bear bunch"? And Edna then says "That's funny, Nazz was right, we can't believe a perv actually fell for my scam!" Eddy wakes up from his spell and says "YOU DID WHAT!...man you're good!...BUT STILL I'M GONNA (Edna gives him back his money) TREAT YOU LIKE ROYALTY!"

Double D then says "You're a very unusual girl Edna, you even have a name that sounds like ours..." Edna then smirks and says "Not just that but... not only do I want friends but I would like to be part of your group and help you succeed in this dog eat dog world... besides you and Ed seem really cool! But Eddy can be easily scammed despite being the grifter of you three. Eddy then says "I like your style! Welcome to the club, we always have room for our group... even if you're not a guy." Double D then says, "Actually Edna, Eddy isn't used to being around females nor having a female as part of our group but me and Ed are beginning to like you already." Edna then blushes and smiles in a cute way.

Ed then says, "The new Ed should have a...AAAAHHHH! THE JAWBREAKERS ARE GONE! And something smells stinky!" Edna sniffs and says, "Smells like an unusual breed of perfume... do you know anyone with such a scent?" The three male Eds shout "KANKERS!" Edna then says, "That's serious, how can a Kanker sore smell like that?" Double D then says, "No Edna, the Kankers Sisters are the meanest crudest girls (except May) who treat us badly and make us their boyfriends... plus they steal our money and jawbreakers."

Edna then says, "Now that's not a very nice thing to do! Hmph! How about we go to their house and get those treats back?" Eddy then grabs Edna by the dress and says, "Are you on stupid pills? That's a suicide mission!" Edna then says, "For you boys at least but I'm a girl... what can they do to a girl? Now where do they live?" Double D then says, "I'm amazed, you'd actually want to help us? In that case they live in the trailer park near the creek... I'm coming with you and so is Ed...you too Eddy!" Edna then says, "Of course I'd help you, we're friends now, also... I'M A ED!"

**(At the Park n' Flush trailer park)**

As the four Eds inflitrate the trailer park, they were jumped by Lee and Marie Kanker who scream out "RAGGLE FRAGGLE!" and tells the four, "Well look what the cat dragged in... looking for these?" Lee and Marie have four jawbreakers in their arms and the male Eds are shocked to see them. Lee then says, "Now that you fell for our trap now you're ours... but who is that girl with you?" Edna then gulps and says to Double D, "Wow, they are terrifying... but if I back down my older sister, cousin, and you guys will think differently of me..." Edna sees a steel pipe and grabs it and stands infront of the Eds and shouts at the two sisters, "S...S...S...STAY BACK! Just hand over the treats and leave my new friends alone... and no one gets hurt!"

Lee then says, "Aww... that weird "ugly" girl wants to protect our "boyfriends" Well Marie put down the jawbreakers and let's show her we're the toughest in all of Peach Creek!" Marie puts down the jawbreakers and they laugh evily. Edna then whispers to Double D, "Forget about me... grab the Jawbreakers and run!" So Lee and Marie then pounce on Edna while the Eds just grab the jawbreakers. Feeling bad for her, Double D stays behind and couldn't believe what he is seeing...

Edna somehow manages to fight off the two and she dogpiles on Lee and Marie Kanker and Lee says, "I don't get it, how can a "ugly" girl manage to outfight us?" Marie then says, "What are you anyway?" Edna then says, "I AM A ED! Oh and if you hurt my "Nakama" again there will be a repeat performance!" Edna walks away but then she notices May coming out of the trailer after vacuming it and May asks, "Geez guys, what happened to you... did "Big Ed" get another pebble in his shoe?" Lee is so angry from losing that she shouts, "MAY GET BACK IN THE TRAILER AND CLEAN THE STOVE AND AFTER THAT DO MARIE'S HOMEWORK AND CLEAN THE BATHROOM SINK!" May sadly goes back into the trailer. Edna couldn't help but feel so bad for her.

**(At Ed's house)**

Ed gives everyone a jawbreaker and as Edna sucks on one she feels so sad. Double D then says, "Edna... how did you learn how to fight like that? None of us can last 5 minutes with those two!" Edna then says, "As a nerdy girl, I have to learn how to fight back in self-defence... plus Nazz and my older sister taught me those moves." Eddy then says, "Yep, Glad to have you as one of us Edna, just wait till Nazz hears about this! Umm why are you so sad?"

Edna then says, "Oh it's nothing... nothing you would understand..." Double D then says, "Actually I know what it is... you're homesick right?" Edna then slowly shakes her head and says, "I know, how about we go watch a movie?" Ed then says, "I know one... KILLER KLOWNS FROM OUTER SPACE!" Edna shivers a bit. Eddy then says, "How about...The Dark Knight?" Edna whimpers a bit with a tear falling from her eye. Double D then notices this and says, "How about... GRINDHOUSE! A loving tribute to 70's grindhouse movies and it's a 2 in 1 movie... "PLANET TERROR" and "THUNDERBOL..." I mean "DEATH PROOF!"

Edna happily claps her hands and says, "Yay! I'll go for that!" Eddy then says, "But my big brother just got me "The Dark Knight" as a birthday gift!" Double D then says, "We're watching "Grindhouse" and that's final... plus Edna is a new member of our group and she did save us back there!"

So they watch both movies but Edna cannot stop feeling sorry for May Kanker. Almost as if May needed a friend and Edna should answer that call...

**NEXT TIME: **Can a Ed befriend a Kanker?


	2. Can a Ed befriend a Kanker?

**Ed, Edd, Eddy, n Edna**

By Winter Knight

Chapter 2: "Can a Ed befriend a Kanker?"

Note: I do not own Ed, Edd, n Eddy...but "The Fourth Ed" is mine!

This is a spin-off of "The Grim ED-ventures of Ed, Edd, n Eddy". I always wondered what if Edna existed in the "Ed, Edd, n Eddy" canon and...THIS STORY DOES NOT CONTAIN SUPERNATURAL ELEMENTS!

Also I reconned that this fanfic takes place in June so that the summer can last longer.

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**Last Time: Nazz introduces Ed, Edd, n Eddy to her cousin Edna (who just happens to technically be a "Ed") and showed her stuff to her new friends. Sure enough they were impressed. However after defending the Eds from a Kanker attack, Edna felt bad for the one lone Kanker who isn't like the other two. Oh and Double D just prevented Edna from seeing scary movies involving the one thing she fears the most.... On the other hand she somehow in her strange way got good dreams from watching "Grindhouse" with her new friends... but she wants to be friends with that other Kanker girl... but is it possible? Come find out!**

**(The Next Morning)**

Edna, in her nightgown, slippers and protective vest walks down to the Park n Flush Trailer Park. She sees May Kanker in her "feetie pajamas" going to get the paper. May turns around and Edna then goes up to her and says, "I believe this is yours..here you go!" May then gets the paper and says, "Thanks... but who are you? And are you new to this town?" Edna then says, "That's not important... what's important is... what is the one thing you lack in life?"

May scratches her head and says, "Umm... a pet monkey? Oh no wait... it is People skills? Ooooh I get it it's...." Edna then says, "Actually here's a hint if you solve this riddle...

_"What is the one special thing I can show you... but you cannot see it?"_

May ponders this for a long time but when she realizes it she smiles but then says, "It's friendship! But why do you want to be friends with me? No one was ever brave enough to be friends with a Kanker Sister... sorry I was just confused by this... I mean it's not like everyday a stranger comes to town and wants to be my friend... and why me?"

Edna then says, "Well... you're different, you seem to be smart, debonnair, different from your sisters, and how I say... I see a bit of me in you, so how about it?" May then says, "Let me have some time to think....OK! I'm May Kanker, now who are you?" Edna then says, "Sorry but I cannot reveal my name or you might think differently of me?" May then says, "Oh I get it, you have a obscenity for a name... I have some relatives with a similar problem like Aunt (CENSORD), Cousin (OH THAT'S SUCH A HORRIBLE WORD!) and uncle (CAN'T PRINT THIS IN A FANFIC)."

Edna's jaw drops at such horrible volcabulary but then she says, "Well it is true that there REALLY are people with horrible names out there in the word, the reason why I cannot reveal my name is because you might think something bad will happen to you." May makes big misty eyes and then Edna confesses, "Ok... It's Edna!" May then says, "Well pleasure to meet you Edna, wow... my first friend! Umm why didn't you say your name earlier?" Edna then says, "Hello! E-D-N-A! The first two letters of my name! I mean...You Can't Spell Edna with "E" and "D"!"

May then thinks it out and says, "Oh... OHHHHH! so... (Edna nods) and... (Edna nods) you... (Edna nods) they... (Edna nods) friends... (Edna nods) and... (Edna nods) me... (Edna nods) So you're the one Marie and Lee refer to as "that crazy "Ugly" girl who thinks she's a Ed"... You're not going to attack me are you?" Edna then says, "Never... I felt bad for you! According from a reliable source you were always mistreated by your sisters and so I want to be your friend and show you that there is someone who will care about you... also I fought your sisters because they wanted to hurt my "Nakama!"

May shivers as she says, "But yours hate me... who is the reliable source... maybe he doesn't hate me." Edna then says, "Just a friend" and she winks, she continues, "Anyway as a token of friendship, you are invited to my house, I will be ordering pizza and I will try to get my friends to get along with you... they would have to because honestly other than me and reliable source I have the most common sense of them!"

May's eyes are as big as saucers as she says to Edna, "PIZZA! YOU'RE INVITING ME OVER FOR PIZZA? Wow! Thank you! You really are a great friend!" Edna then says, "Ok, bring the best dress you have and bring some paper bags... you're going to need them! Right now I'm going to mingle with Cousin Nazz's friends. May is suprised and asks, "Nazz? She is your cousin? Howcome she never tol... oh that's right!" Edna then says, "There there... as your friend I will guarantee your inside and outside will be as beautiful as Cousin Nazz's now get back in that trailer and get ready to party! Oh and do not tell your sisters about it, they are "meanie-bo-beanies"!" May giggles and says, "You got that right! Bye!"

**(Cul-De-Sac... early afternoon)**

Edna walks out of her house in her evening clothes complete with a yellow ribbon and sees Sarah and Jimmy in front of her yard and Sarah then says, "Hey Edna, wanna have a tea party with us?" Edna nods and joins in. Edna then sees Jimmy drinking tea and hugging his stuffed bunny "Mr. Num Num" and says, "Sarah, I really don't think boys like Jimmy are supposed to be..." Sarah then covers Edna's mouth and whispers to her, "Shush... Jimmy is very very Very sensative about THAT fact."

Jimmy sees Edna and says to her, "You know Nazz's Cousin, you look like that "ugly" girl on TV!" Edna responds, "Yeah I get that alot, but I don't care... she's very popular... being herself! I mean it's alot better then being busy... being delicious and I doubt anyone will get that joke!" Jimmy giggles and says to Sarah, "She's smart carismatic and funny, Nazz's family is very interesting!"

Eddy shows up and says, "Edna! What are you doing with "Diaper-rash Jimmy" and "Frogmouthed Sarah"! Edna then says, "Eddy please, I met them before I even met you! Well they ARE Cousin Nazz's friends." Sarah then says, "You know that jerk?" Edna then says, "Well my technicallity yes... he is... plus I am a Ed and proud of it!" Sarah adds 2 and 2 and says, "Ohhh I should've guessed at the first two letters at your name, We Can't Spell Edna with "E" and "D"!" Jimmy then says, "So we shouldn't be friends with Nazz's cousin?" Sarah then says, "I...don't...know...anymore!" Edna then says, "Relax you two... I'm not gonna scam anybody, in fact (To Eddy) I was planning to order pizza at my house! And that is it! order pizza and go watch something bedwettening scary on TV! No scam!"

Eddy then says, "Hmm no scam...but I like the pizza idea!" Edna then says, "I'm bringing a friend with me... she is a little shy so be on your best behavior or I tell Cousin Nazz about those photos o..." Eddy covers her mouth and the two walk away from a very confused Sarah and Jimmy.

Eddy then says, "Well we were going to have a scam but... Pizza good, let's tell Ed and Doubl..." But then Kevin rides his bike and runs over Eddy's foot on purpose. Kevin just laughs and says, "Haw Haw DORK! Hey, who's the girl with you?" Edna then says, "Hey that's not really nice! Oh and the name's Edna and I'm Nazz's cousin!" Kevin seems confused and says, "Man, Nazz is definately at the shallow end of the gene pool." Edna then says, "I beg your pardon!" Kevin then says, "And you look like that "ugly" girl on TV Haw Haw Haw!"

Edna then says something Eddy couldn't believe what she just said... "Oh yeah? Well what are you hiding under that hat of yours? A bald spot the size of your butt?" Kevin's mind snapped and he turns around and says, "TAKE...THAT...BACK!!!" Edna then says, "Only if you apologize to my friend Eddy and stop calling him and his friends "Dorks" like Cousin Nazz tells me you do!" Kevin is dumbfounded and says, "Nazz talks about me?" Edna then replies, "Yes she did before I moved here, she says you are a (Whispers to Kevin who apparently has huge suprised eyes) and when you call my new friends dorks, it means you are compensating something..."

Eddy giggles and Edna then says, "That's right Kevin, I AM THE FOURTH ED! So go ahead... call me a dork and see what happens!" Kevin shivers and says, "Man you scare me... I'm "dorking" out of here!" Kevin rides his bike away and Edna then shouts at the top of her lungs, "I STILL SAY YOU HAVE A BALD SPOT THE SIZE OF YOUR BUTT UNDER THAT HAT OF YOURS!" Edna then hears the sound of a bike crashing into a wall.

Edna and Eddy show up and to Edna's shock, she sees Double D and Ed dressed as maids and the place is set to a cafe' like setting. Edna then looks at the two and looks at Eddy and says, "So let me get this straight... you get money by performing a scam, at the cost of your friends' dignity... just what is wrong with you? Hey Double D! Ed! take off those costumes, I'm having pizza at my house and you are all invited!"

Double D takes off his maid outfit and says, "Really? It seems like I wasn't the only one who wanted out of this scam and I discover this, is there something you can't do Edna?" Edna then says, "Umm... well I am try to overcome my shyness Double D. Ed? Why are you in your underwear? Didn't you bring a spare change of clothes?"

Ed replies, "They were in the wash!" Edna just rolls her eyes and says, "Oh come one Ed, Double D while you walk Ed to his house for a change of clothes I'll go get the pizza ready. Eddy then says, "And what am I going to do?" Edna then says, "Well I want you to never do any type of scam like that to those boys again, now get ready, pizza at my house!" Eddy then says, "Hmm you might not like scams but you seem to care alot about us! Oh and isn't Nazz coming?" Eddy then says, "Nope, she's babysitting Sarah and Jimmy so I guess it's us five at my place."

Eddy's mind snapped as he forgot Edna was going to bring someone with her and and he shouts, "FIVE? Who's the other person?" Edna then says, "Just a friend, someone I met in the neighborhood, I mean you'll like her!" Eddy then replies, "Hmm... Well I do trust you and you seem to be alot like all three of us... Ok... I approve of it, and make sure you bring a good pants wettening movie... or a raunchy sex comedy!"

Edna shakes her head and says, "GET YOUR MIND OUT OF THE GUTTER EDDY!"

**(That night)**

As Edna prepares her place for the dinner she is humming "Orinoco Flow" by Enya. Edna hears a doorbell and to her suprise as she opens the door, she sees a rather happy May Kanker in a nice dress complete with a pink ribbon. May then hugs Edna and says, "Thank you so much, I can't believe this is the first party I am ever invited to!"

Edna then says, "FIRST...of many my friend, now the boys aren't here yet so make yourself home at "Casa de Espinoza" May then comments, "Your last name is Espinoza?" Edna then says, "Yeah... yeah I know, not many people in Peach Creek have last names so you and I aren't so different. Now did you give your sisters the slip?" May replies, "Yep, I left a scarecrow in my room, they're probably yelling at it or throwing rocks at it."

Edna looks down and says, "Oh you poor girl..." Edna hears a doorbell and panics, she places the paper bag on May and says, "Now get to the table, the boys are coming! Oh and try to enjoy yourself until I spill the beans." Edna opens the door and she sees a unseen pizza delivery guy deliver 5 pizzas, she pays for them and gets them.

"False Alarm!" said a rather content Edna who just happens to have pizzas with sausage bits on one, "the works" on one, mushrooms on one, BBQ chicken on one, and one with anchovies." May's mouth waters and says, "You got anchovies! Yum!" Edna then says, "Hmmm what was going to be mine since I thought no one likes anchovies but hey... you're the first mate!" Then Edna hears another doorbell and knows it's them for sure.

Edna asks, "Who is this?" Ed replies, "CANDYGRAM!" Edna then says, "Wow, you guys are SNL fans? Oh enough comedy, welcome to "Casa de Espinoza!" The Eds enter the house and see the house as it appears to have a hispanic charm to it. The Eds see the lone girl with a paperbag on her head and Eddy then says, "So who's your friend and what's with the paperbag?" Edna replies, "Umm she's a friend... and she has a big ugly pimple so ugly that if it was televised the FCC wouldn't allow it so don't take off the bag!"

Ed then says,"... Eddy had a worser pimple... I want to be the one who see zit!" Edna giggles and says, "Good pun Ed but no... leave the bag alone...ok?" Double D then says, "So what's her name?" Edna then stutters and says... "Umm... Uhh...(sees a picture of a Mayan temple) Maya....(sees a package of chocolate chip cookies) Keebler... Maya Keebler! Yeah her name is Maya Keebler... and she just moved from Brazil!... And she speaks poor english so don't expect her to say much!"

"Maya" extends her hand and Double D shakes it and says, "Pleasure to meet you Maya! I see you take a liking to Edna. "Maya" just nods her head. Eddy and Ed are suprised by all the pizza Edna ordered and Eddy then says, "Edna, you're one of the best females on the planet (Edna blushes) and if this was a job and I was your boss you're vice president along with Double D!" Ed replies, "But what about me boss? I want to be vice president too!" Eddy then says, "Watch your tounge boy if you like this job!" Ed then says, "Like this job?"

"Maya" just giggles at the "Return of the Living Dead" reference. Edna then asks, "So.. who brought a movie?" Ed then grins and pulls out a DVD of "DEAD ALIVE" ("Braindead" to you non-American readers) Edna then says, "Cool! Peter Jackson's zombie movie, I never saw it but I heard it is the most violent, gut-retching, blood splattering, bed-wettingest movie ever PUT IT IN! PUT IT IN!"

Double D then says, "But Edna, we're going to be eating, I don't need to see that!" Edna then says, "Well... you don't have to join in on the movie Double D, this is pretty much a thing me and Ed can do... as well as Maya if she likes this kind of thing. Eddy just sits back and eats some pizza and Edna puts the DVD on and to her suprise and shock...

Edna shouts, "ED, YOU GOT THE WRONG DVD! IT'S A BARNEY DVD!" Ed then says, "But Edna that's impossible unless...OH NO... BABY SISTER HAS THE DVD BY MISTAKE! BABY SISTER!" Eddy laughs hysterically but then the sausage bit gets caught in his throat and is choking.

Edna then notices Eddy is turning blue but without a moment to spare, "Maya" grabs Eddy and performs the "heimlich manuver" and kept thrusting his chest until the sausage bit is coughed up and he faints.

When Eddy wakes up he notices "Maya" is giving him mouth to mouth. Eddy wakes up and says, "You...you...saved my life! And you gave me a kiss... a friend of Edna's a friend of mine!" Edna's eyes perk up as she says, "So... she's a friend now?" Eddy then says, "Of course, she saved my life, I don't care if her pimple is as bad as the one I once had, I want to see what she looks like!"

Before Edna can do anything, Eddy lifts the paper bag from her head...

Eddy is on the ground, foaming in the mouth and spazzing out. Edna then says, "Eddy are you alright?" Ed then shouts, "KANKER!" And hides inside Double D's sock-hat. Double D then says, "No wonder why you told us a white lie about your new friend...and I don't blame you!" Edna then says, "Yeah...huh? You don't?" Double D then says, "No I don't, you see I thought I was the only one who saw something different with May and after what I saw earlier she definately is different and I'm suprised you had the confidence to befriend her, I'm proud of you Edna!"

Edna blushes and says, "Well thanks Double D, I might be shy but confidence is something that grows within me daily...it was you guys who planted that seed in the first place. Oh yes May is cool... very very cool!" May then says, "So Double D, what were those things you think about me?" Double D then says, "Well I was the reliable source who told Edna about you, you seem friendly, have hidden intelligence, and you need friends, I will be a friend too!"

May notices the lump in Double D's hat and says, "Umm Ed...you don't have to hide in there, I'm just being with my friends!" Ed comes out and says, "Not even a hug or a kiss?" May replies, "No... would a handshake do?" Ed then shakes hands with May and says, "Now pull my finger!"

Before anything can happen, Eddy snaps out of his trance and he shouts," A kanker... A KANKER... YOU BROUGHT AND BEFRIENDED A KANKER! And you call yourself a Ed... I aughta..." Double D shields May and Edna and says, "Eddy before you make a jackaninny out of yourself here's the thing, May is different from the other two and doesn't seem to want to be a bully to us and me and Edna brought out her inner self and befriend her, then Edna invited her over and arranged this dinner so we can make peace and get to know her better and one important thing... SHE SAVED YOUR LIFE!!!"

Eddy then looks at May and looks at Ed, Edd, n Edna. Eddy then gets up and extends his hand but then ends up hugging May and Eddy replies, "Edna's right...oh and thanks! And sorry for judging you just for being a Kanker." May replies, "That's alright...umm... shouldn't we go to Nazz's house and get that movie before they see it?"

Edna's face turns red and says, "Yeah you're right! If they see it then we will be very embarassing and it will cause Sarah and Jimmy to have nightmares!"

**(Nazz's house)**

Edna and the others make it to Nazz's house but to their suprise, Nazz, Sarah, and Jimmy are actually enjoying "DEAD ALIVE", May then says, "Well that was a waste... wanna go back to the house and finish that pizza?" Eddy replies, "I'm in!"

**(Back to Edna's house)**

So they had some more pizza. Then it was time to go. May then says, "Wow... I got pizza, made a friend, and hung out with the Eds! But now I have to go back to my trailer and be with my sisters...hmph!"

Edna then says, "Don't worry May, I'll come up with something to see you again and do more stuff like this!" Ed then says, "It's a real pleasure to have you here... I cannot believe I just said that!" Eddy then says, "Ok, I'm going to hit the sack now!"

May then walks home but after looking at her four new friends, a tear falls from her eye and realizes that her two sisters might not let her enjoy such a thing or anything for that matter.

**NEXT TIME:** Mission ED-possible!


	3. Mission EDpossible!

**Ed, Edd, Eddy, n Edna**

By Winter Knight

Chapter 3: Mission ED-possible

Note: I do not own Ed, Edd, n Eddy...but "The Fourth Ed" is mine!

This is a spin-off of "The Grim ED-ventures of Ed, Edd, n Eddy". I always wondered what if Edna existed in the "Ed, Edd, n Eddy" canon and...THIS STORY DOES NOT CONTAIN SUPERNATURAL ELEMENTS!

Also I reconned that this fanfic takes place in June so that the summer can last longer.

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**Last Time: Edna meets May Kanker and she is happy to finally make a friend... as well as friends in Ed, Edd n Eddy, but can this last? I mean what if May's sisters find out?**

**(The Next Morning)**

A day passed after May Kanker met Edna, friendship has has altered May to the point of making her polar opposites of her other sisters.

Lee tells Marie, "Something's wrong with May, either she has worms or she is lonely." Marie then says, "I know how we can cheer her up!"

**(Edna's house)**

Ed comes out of a shower (Yeah... you heard me!) Edna then says, "There! Now do you feel nice, fresh, and better? I mean if you continue to stink up the house, my parents wouldn't approve of it and also it's time for CHANGE!" Ed then says, "Yeah... just like that guy on TV who keeps talking about change, you are a miracle worker Edna!" Edna then says, "Well looks like I won the bet, Eddy owes me a dollar now that I got you to shower! And with that dollar the jawbreakers are on me! umm Ed? Where are you?"

Edna looks around and finds out Ed has vanished and his clothes are still there. she shouts, "OH MY GOODNESS! ED'S STREAKING...AGAIN!"

Edna then runs out of the house and shows, "ED! ED!" And she ends up in a mudhole. Rolf walks up to her and says, "Hello strange girl, you not be from around here yes no?" Edna then says, "Hi to you too... anyway have you seen this guy running around naked in these parts?" Rolf sees a pic of Ed swallowing a pie in one bite. Rolf responds, "Rolf have not seen pie-faced Ed boy anywhere, who are you?" Edna then gets up and says, "Oh my name is Edna, pleased to meet you!" Rolf then shivers and shouts, "ANOTHER ED! RUN AWAY!" Edna then grabs Rolf by the arm and says, "Hold on, I'm not going to do anything bad, I'm here to look for a friend, anyway if you don't see him, can you at least help me?" Rolf then says, "Well since you seem harmless and friendly, Rolf will help, Rolf must get other Urban Rangers for the rescue mission!"

**(Soon... and after Edna showered and changed into a nice dress with images of lemons on it)**

Edna then meets Johnny 2x4 and she says, "Hey, Cousin Nazz told me about you, you must be Johnny 2x4, how are you?" Johnny then says, "Wow, you must be new here, what's your name?" Edna then says, "Why, it's Edna!" Johnny then says, "Does that mean... (Edna nods) COOL! FOUR EDS!" Edna replies, "Well one of them is missing and seeing as you boys are the local boy scouts I hope you guys return him safe and sound! Oh hi Jimmy!" Rolf then says, "Rolf brings you here to save no neck Ed boy and Rolf knows one place he can possibly be held at!"

**(Kanker's trailer)**

Lee Kanker then goes up to Marie and says, "Hey Marie, some uniformed weirdos are on our yard, better get out the 2x4s!"

Meanwhile, Ed is tied up and tossed into May's room. Ed closes his eyes and says, "This is just a nightmare, this is just a nightmare. I'm in my happy place, I'm in my happy place, Grandpa, is that you!" May Kanker shows up and as she unties him she says to him, "Hi Ed, why did my sisters throw you in here anyway?" Ed hides under the bed and shivers.

May has a frustraighted look on her face and says, "Ed, remember we had fun together last night?" Ed then says, "This could be a trap set by the Kanker Sisters!" May replies, "But I'm a good guy now!" Ed glares at her and says, "Shut up Jiggler, I'm on to you…" May replies, "Ok first off wrong fanfic and second remember, Edna became my friend and helped me make new friends with you guys?"

It took Ed 15 minutes to remember and he shouts, "HUG ME!" May just does that and then she says to Ed, "I know how to make use of this situation, and she reads TV Guide, tells Ed, "I happen to be the only Kanker who is literate." and she turns on the TV, changing the channel to show a episode of "Round the Twist" Ed watches in pure delight and says, "AUSTRALIANS ARE WEIRD!" while May is confused by this and asks, "I wonder why Fox Kids showed this?"

**(Edna's house)**

Edna continues to look for Ed but to her horror, she sees Rolf, Jimmy, and Johnny tied up in a ribbon and a tag is attatched to them and it reads "NICE TRY!". Edna then sees Double D walking towards her and he asks her "Have you seen Ed lately Edna?" Edna then replies, "No I haven't and I can guess where he's at... Get Cousin Nazz and Eddy... this is war!"

**(Later)**

Eddy hears about this and he says, "I knew it! Those "Skanker Sisters" should never be trusted! Nazz is shocked and says, "You befriended a Kanker? I tell ya cousin, you do such weird things, like did you tell the Eds about the graveyard thing?" Double D asks Edna, "What do you mean by "Graveyard thing?" Edna then says, "Ok... I just like hanging out in graveyards, they are silent, serene, and really fun to be at on Halloween."

Eddy then says, "Ok, you are one Spooky chick! Anyway we need a plan to get Lumpy back and plan revenge on all three of them!" Edna then stands up and tells Eddy, "Eddy! Don't blame May, I'm sure the other two planned this! I mean she really does want friends but her anti-social bretheren seem to think otherwise. So we're going to get Ed back and plan a way for May to hang with us and that is that!"

Eddy then asks, "What is up with you Edna?" Edna then tells Eddy as well as everyone, "My older sister told me to always help those in need and we both believe in peace and serenity. I hate bullying and I like helping others and friendship. Double D and Nazz are in tears at Edna's speech and Eddy then says, "Yeah, Yeah, anyway the quicker we get lumpy out of there the quicker I avoid the "Skankers"!

Edna then makes a look at Eddy and says, "Don't forget Eddy... May saved your life! Now be nice..."

**(Outside the Kanker's Trailer)**

The four then see Marie hanging up clothes. Edna then says to Double D, Eddy, and Nazz, "I never told you guys this but I'm actually good at imitating voices so listen to this." Edna then tickles her throat and shouts in Lee Kanker's voice, "HEY MARIE, CHECK THIS OUT, THE NEXT DOOR NEIGHBOR IS TAKING OFF HIS SHIRT AGAIN!" Marie's visable eye become huge and she runs off while the other three laugh at this. Then Edna sees Lee making sandwiches and she shouts in Marie's voice, "HEY LEE! THE NEXT DOOR NEIGHBOR IS TAKING OFF HIS SHIRT AGAIN!" Then both of Lee's eyes become huge and visable and she runs out the door. Eddy then says, "Edna... that was pretty good!" Edna then says, "Yep, it takes lots of practice... that and May's sisters aren't that bright, now let's get Ed back!"

Edna and the three put on white sheets for disguise and went through the door to the trailer. They go up the stairs and Edna then says, "Stairs? Why does a trailer have a stairway? Oh well... back to rescuing Ed." They open the door and they see May and Ed watching "Round the Twist". The two see the four in white sheets and May screams, "AAAHHH! GHOSTS!" Edna takes off her sheet and she says, "It's us, we're here to rescue Ed!" May's eyes widen and she hugs Edna and says, "Oh I'm so glad to see you again!" Eddy then gags and says, "Yeah, Yeah, let's just grab Lumpy and go!" May then grabs Edna and says, "Wait! Take me with you! I don't think I should stay with those two anymore." Edna then says, "I kinda figured on that, now c'mon!"

As the four grab Ed and May, they bump into a rather angry Lee and Marie Kanker. Edna then shrugs and goes, "Umm... Oooooooh.... I am a ghost! BOOoooooo!" Lee and Marie then put yellow jawbreakers in their mouths and Nazz, Double D, Eddy, and Edna's sheets turn purple and they take them off. Lee then shouts, "IT'S YOU! THE CRAZY GIRL!" Marie then shouts, "SHE ALSO BROUGHT THE OTHER TWO WITH HER!"

The two approach them and as Lee says, "I am so going to enjoy this!" Edna then pulls out a stick with what appears to be "doodie" on it and she sticks it near their fear-stricken faces as she shouts, "DOODIE! DOODIE!" Marie then sniffs the "doodie" and she takes it off the stick and eats it. Marie then says, "HA! Nice try! It's a chocolate bar! Milky Way to be exact!"

Then while the two were distracted by the Milky Way bar, Eddy goes up to a record player, and puts on a record of the Benny Hill theme song on the player and then the fast motion chase starts.

(Benny Hill music plays)

They go to different rooms and Nazz then sees Lee with a chainsaw and runs really fast from her, Double D opens the shower curtain to hide but sees Marie bathing in there and runs off, Eddy tries to hide in a dresser but May was already in there so he screams and runs off, Ed starts running around with scissors and runs by Edna and Lee accidentally cuts off Edna's clothes revealing a swimsuit because Standards and Practices are on my butt at the moment. Edna gets so angry that she chases Lee with her club, but Lee retaliates with a weedwhacker, but Edna strikes back with shampoo on Lee's hair and giant scissors in her hand. Eddy grabs Edna's scissors and runs around even more till he bumped into the other two Kankers, cutting their clothes and showing off their swimsuits for censorship reasons. And then they go through and coming out of different doors in a hallway till May and the Eds bump into four teenagers and their Great Dane dog and ran back in the hallways. Nazz gets in the middle and for no reason her clothes strip off revealing her swimsuit and she pulls out a sign that reads "gosh-darn Benny Hill parody!" But then Everyone is in the middle of the room, there is a traffic light that makes the music stop that says "no chasing" and when it switched to "chasing" the music re-started and the chase began. The chase continued and Edna managed to fool the two sisters by painting a fake door that says "Eds are in here" so they ran into the fake door and fell to the floor.

(Benny Hill music ends)

Edna and the others then find a pink room and then they suddenly feel sleepy. Edna then says, "Oh no, something in this room smells like flowers, motor oil, and fish oil... run away... ruuun awaaa..."

**(Five Minutes Later)**

Edna wakes up and finds herself tied up. She also sees Nazz, Ed, Edd, n Eddy tied up as well. Then she turns and sees a sad looking May and a triumphant Lee and Marie with a pile of rotten vegetables. Lee then says, "So you're the nut who goes around and says you're a "Fourth Ed"... what's your name?" Edna then replies, "Edna! What are you meanie bo-beanies going to do to us?" Marie then says, "You're name is "Edna"? I guess you are a fourth Ed. Well while we make out with our "boyfriends" in front of you and that dumb blonde, we will be pelting you and her with our supply of rotten vegetables.

They get May, Marie hands her with a rotten tomato and Lee tells her, "Ok May, you get the honor of throwing a tomato at the one who made a monkey out of us! Now do it!" May is nervous and as if on purpose, she drops the tomato on Marie's pants and Marie is angered and tells May, "You pathetic waste of make up! You can't even do a simple thing, when we finish having our way with Edna we're gonna make you clean up the mess!"

Ed then says, "I'm thirsty!" Edna then smirks and has a Idea... She shouts, "HEY! RAMUNE!"

Before Lee and Marie can do anything, the wall suddenly bursts and a giant bottle of Ramune with arms, legs, and a face bursted through the wall yelling "OH YEAH! OH YEAH!" Ed then shouts "COOL! IT'S "THE RAMUNE MAN"! Then everyone got shocked. Lee is furious and tells the Ramune man, "You stupid jug of juice!You fix that wall right now! Mom will not believe that a giant bottle of Ramune bursted through the wall and I'm gonna get in trouble for it, don't touch me you drink!" Raumune Man then says "OH YEAH!" Marie then adds "OH NO! naughty naughty Ramune! that's also your problem your slogan, it should be "OH NO! what have I done to this trailer?"

So as Lee and Marie bet up the Ramune Man to fix the wall. May pulls out a knife and cuts the ropes that tied up Edna, Nazz, Ed, Edd, n Eddy and then they ran off and never looked back.

**(Later that night at Edna's house)**

May Kanker shows up in Edna's room in a new nightgown and says, "Wow, this looks nice, thanks Edna!" Edna then says, "You're welcome, thanks for helping us out! Those two are a bad influence and a hazard to your health May, stay with me!" May then agrees.

Ed, Double D, and Nazz are watching a episode of "Wacky Races" and Ed then asks, "What's wrong Eddy? Normally you get us to bet on the races and I end up betting on the "Dick Dastardly and Muttley in the Mean Machine 00!" Double D then tells Ed, "ED! Why would you bet on those cheating rouges? You know they never win a race!" Eddy then says, "It's nothing, just go watch the race." Then it turns out "the Gruesome twosome in the Creepy Coupe 02" won the race. Nazz then shouts, "HEY EDNA! YOUR CAR WON!" Edna then says, "Yippee! I guess that means Ed treats us to ice cream tomorrow!"

Eddy then feels something behind him and it was May Kanker hugging him. Eddy then says, "Ick! What's your problem?" May then says, "Nothing, I'm just hugging you because you're my friend." Eddy smiles slightly and then he brings up something, "Hey Edna, if "Curly" is living with you, isn't "Moe" and "Larry" going to try to get her back?"

Edna then says, "I hope not! Then again they only know where you three live, they have no idea where I live! And if they do I will not give up May, she deserves a new happier life and CHANGE in her life." Ed replies, "There's that word again! Just like that guy on TV who talks about change!" Edna then adds, "I'm going to protect her the same way I'd protect you three and Cousin Nazz.... hey why did you join the rescue mission?" Nazz replies, "Well it's because you're family and so are the Eds."

Edna then replies, "Not family... MY NAKAMA!" May Kanker then says, "Just what is a "Nakama" anyway?" Nazz replies, "Nakama is a Japanese term for comrades, friends, and people who are considered closer than family... It's a common term used in the anime "One Piece".. not that I even watch that show!.

May's eyes are huge and tear filled and she says, "You really think of me like that?" Edna nods and she ends up glomped my May. Eddy then says, "I also feel touched, you think of me as family Edna?" Edna then says, "Yup! But if you keep acting like a "meanie bo-beanie" then you will be a "black sheep"!"

Double D then asks Edna, "By the way Edna, how are you able to flawlessly imitate voices?" Edna replies, "Simple, lots of practice, I started out imitating Hanna Barbara Characters (Snagglepuss voice) I'd imitate Snagglepuss... and Muttley even!" (Laughs like Muttley)" May then says, "Amazing!" Ed then shouts, "DO EDDY!" Edna then says in her Eddy voice, "I'm Eddy, money money money!" Eddy then says in suprise, "I really sound like that?"

Edna then yawn and says, "Ok, last one! And we go to bed." Then Ed says, "AMERICA FERRERA!" Edna blushes and says, "Geez! I didn't even do any yet!" Ed then pokes at Edna's beautymark under her left eye." Edna then asks Ed, "What are you doing Ed?" Ed then says, "It's a chocolate chip for you are a sweet girl Edna!" Edna then blushes heavily and giggles and glomps Ed big time. Then May does to too and May smells Ed and says, "Hey Ed... where's your odor?" Ed replies, "Edna made me shower before my capture!" May stared at Edna and says, "You got "Big Ed" to shower?" Edna nods and says, "Sorry but most of my life, people teased me about my beautymark but when Ed said something nice about it...well... (blush) Umm I am aware of your crush on Ed and I'm worried you will pound me out of jealousy"

May then says, "No I won't, in fact I really want friends anyway, especially you (Ed) you (Edd) and especially you Eddy!" Eddy then says, "Enough "cutesy stuff" it's making me sick! I gotta scam in the morning, so goodnight!"

Nazz then turns off the light and then everyone falls asleep. Ed wakes up and he whispers, "Umm Edna... Thank you for saving me and I am glad you entered our life little chocolate chip!"

Edna then blushes heavily and just goes to sleep.

**NEXT TIME: **"Moe" and "Larry" do want their sister back and Edna comes up with a plan to see if they really do want her back! What is it? Find out next time!


	4. Edna's EDgenious plan!

**Ed, Edd, Eddy, n Edna**

By Winter Knight

Chapter 4: Edna's ED-genious plan!

Note: I do not own Ed, Edd, n Eddy...but "The Fourth Ed" is mine!

This is a spin-off of "The Grim ED-ventures of Ed, Edd, n Eddy". I always wondered what if Edna existed in the "Ed, Edd, n Eddy" canon and...THIS STORY DOES NOT CONTAIN SUPERNATURAL ELEMENTS!

Also I reconned that this fanfic takes place in June so that the summer can last longer.

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**Last Time: The other two Kanker Sisters noticed May Kanker is feeling down so they kidnap Ed to cheer her up. Edna then arranges a rescue party to get him back and she ends up inviting May to stay with her due to how abusive her sisters are. Plus Eddy has to be on good terms with May because she saved his life... well what would you do if your enemy saved your life? So they had a sleep-over and watched "Wacky Races" and betted on some cars.**

May Kanker is sleeping on her sleeping bag and she is happy to finally meet someone who treats her good and she has friends who would do the same. May wakes up and sees Edna smiling cheerfully and half asleep, she is carrying a huge butcher knife. As she sees this, creepy music and whispering can be heard.

May screams and Edna wakes up and she looks at her knife and "Huh? Who took my frying pan and replaced it with this knife?" May then gives her a "wtf" look and she says, "Oh, I always wanted to wake someone up with a frying pan but I must've grabbed a knife by mistake. May then asks, "And why do I hear creepy music and whispering?" Edna replies, "Oh right, Ed is here and he's watching "Suspiria" in the family room. And everytime they play that song it means someone's going to die a gruesome death... Yeah I watched it with Ed last night!"

**(If nobody gets this joke, this was from "Azumanga Daioh" where Osaka does the same exact thing with a butcher knife... The music was added because I finally saw "Suspiria" and not a bad italian movie too!)**

May then asks Ed, "Hey Ed where is Double D and Eddy? Umm.... Ed?" Ed doesn't respond because he is busy watching "Suspiria"

Edna then says as she gets ready to go out, "By the way May, I learned not to interrupt Ed from watching horror movies because he tends to be cranky if you do, also the two are performing a "riding mower scam". I know for a fact it's not going to work but I'm amused by the fact that Eddy's performing a scam that is actually useful.

Ed then says, "MOVIE OVER! Ok Edna, how about I take you and May out for ice cream since I lost the Wacky Races bet last chapter!" May and Edna giggle at the idea and agree. Edna then adds, "Oh and after we get the treats how about we walk by and see how Eddy and Double D are doing with the "riding mower" scam.

**(15 minutes later)**

Edna cheerfully eats bubblegum ice cream, May is happily eating mint chocolate chip ice cream and to their suprise Ed is eating gravy ice cream. Edna then says, "I had no idea such a flavor exists."

Johnny 2x4 and Plank are just collect acorns and then he runs into the three and Johnny then says to them, "Oh HIya Edna! I see Ed is hanging out with you (To Ed) You lucky dog! And who's... EGAD! A KANKER!" Edna then says, "Relax Johnny, she's cool!" Johnny looks at May Kanker and says, "Works for me!" And he continues his acorn hunting.

Then the three decide to see how Eddy and Double D are doing with their scam but when they get there, they see Eddy and Double D covered in lipstick covered kisses, their stand is destroyed and Eddy's jar is empty. May then asks, "Now where have I seen this bef... Ohhhh right!" Edna then asks Eddy, "What happened?"

Eddy responds, "I had the perfect idea for a scam for "riding mowers" from watching reruns of "King of the Hill" and the minute I make a killing, those stupid Kankers ruin our scam, make out with us, and steal our mon... KANKER!" Eddy pulls out a board and is about to strike May with it. May hides behind Ed and Edna then says, "EDDY! BAD MONKEY! NO PEANUT FOR YOU!" Eddy is confused by what she said and she continues, "Just because the Kankers did this to you, doesn't mean May is responcible for it, we went out for ice cream and was enjoying herself, there's no harm in that!" May then adds, "Yeah and remember I saved your life?"

Eddy is speechless and as he sits on the floor he says, "No matter, those other two just took my hard scamed money and they got away with it!" May then says, "Oh... so that's how you guys feel when we do that, I'm sorry." Edna asks May, "Umm May when you guys ruin the Eds' scams and take their money, what do you do with that money?"

May replies as she sheds some tears, "Well we have money trouble at home so that's why we do it and we hope that if we steal their money they would come to our trailer for it and we would have them where we want them. We just use the money for food and money since our mom has a hard time supporting us." Edna looks at Eddy and asks, "Don't you feel at least bad now?"

Eddy then says, "Yeah I guess so... but still they violated us!" Ed then adds, "Then they questioned us for May's disappearance!" Edna then ponders until Nazz walks by and says, "Hi Gu... ACK!" Edna then says, "Nazz it's ok, May's cool, did u forget?" Nazz then looks at May and says, "Works for me! So what's up?" Edna then says, "Well Nazz the other two Kankers ruined Eddy's scam, stole their money, "violated" them, and asked for May. And even if they do want her back I refuse to give her to them, she deserves a better life and I promise her so!"

May then says to Edna, "Well... thanks! But they will eventually continue the search." Edna then says, "If I wouldn't give up the love and friendship for my "Nakama" then what makes me think I'd give you up to those creeps? Although I do have a idea that can solve Eddy's problem and prove a point!"

**(Later that day)**

Nazz goes to Edna's house and Edna then says, "Hi Cousin Naz... umm why are they here?" Sarah and Jimmy are eating rice crackers and Nazz replies, "Well they wanted to join us for tea." Edna then says, "Umm Nazz I don't think those two should even be here?' Sarah gets annoyed and says, "Hey, we have a right, we're your friends too!"

Before Edna can say anything, May shows up and says, "Umm Edna where do you keep the Teddy Grahams?" Sarah and Jimmy see May and the minute Sarah shouts, "OH NO! RUN FOR IT JIMMY!" They run out of the house and don't look back.

Edna then says, "That's why! Oh and the Teddy Grahams are in the cupboard! That's where we keep the other snacks!" Nazz sees May preparing for tea time and says to May, "I guess you have changed for the best, you even got the teddy grahams, great job!" May blushes and Edna replies, "Yep! She's my BBF now other than you and the Eds, anyway good thing Sarah and Jimmy left, I'm gonna do something that could get me in trouble... but it's for May and the Eds' sake!"

Nazz then replies, "I'm listening..." May is also curious about Edna's plan.

Edna then explains her plan, "I really don't think those two like May very much, and to prove this, I plan to pose as a kidnapper and have May as hostage, the ransom would be the money they stole from the Eds. If they do love their sister very much they would follow my instructions and surrender the money to me for her return." May then says, "But what if they actually do it, that could risk our friendship!"

Edna then thinks and responds, "I never thought of that but let's see how it plays out, either way... no matter what happens... we'll always be friends." May smiles as her eyes get teary and Nazz then says, "Edna I'm very proud of you! I mean you really care about other people and you're doing all this stuff for May." Edna then says, "Yup! Now get the tea ready, I got a "hostage negotiation" to commence! Oh and the reason why I'm asking for the money they stole is because that wasn't even nice that they took it from them... oh and they're coming over later on today"

**(Sundown)**

May and Nazz then drink tea as Edna prepares her plan to not only prove if the other two Kankers care for May and to get the Eds' money back.

Edna puts a Kazoo in her mouth to disguise her voice. Edna asks May her phone number and after May tells her, Edna calls the Kanker residence.

Lee Kanker: Kanker Residence!

Edna: WE HAVE YOUR SISTER, IF YOU EVER WANT HER BACK YOU HAVE TO FOLLOW MY INSTRUCTIONS!

Lee Kanker: Hey Marie! Someone has May! Ok you creep! Give us back our sister!

Edna: IF YOU EVER WANT TO SEE HER AGAIN YOU MUST DO THE FOLLOWING, MEET ME IN THE CANDY STORE AND BRING US EVERY CENT YOU EVER STOLE FROM THE EDS, DO IT OR YOU WILL NEVER SEE YOUR SISTER AGAIN!

Lee Kanker: You know forget it, she's not even worth it!

(Lee hangs up phone)

May Kanker then asks Edna, "Well... did it work?" Edna then shivers and makes a very terrifying angry face. Nazz then says, "Whoa! She's really mad!" May Kanker then says, "How mad?" Nazz then replies, "Madder than the time Toonami got cancelled, She must have heard something on the phone she didn't like." Edna angerly puts on her raincoat and makes her trip to the "Park n Flush Trailer Park"

Edna then goes up to the Kanker's trailer and knocks their door. Lee opens it and says, "Oh... it's you! What do you want?" Edna angerly throws her kazoo at Lee and tells them, "You know what? You guys suck!" Then she picks up a stick with what appears to be a chocolate bar on it and she flings it into the trailer.

Edna angerly walks away and she says, "By the way, that's not chocolate!" Then Marie and Lee shriek in horror when they find out what that really is. Edna then walks back to her house and she says, "Justice is served!"

Unaware to either Marie, Lee, and Edna, someone or something is behind the Kanker's trailer and spray painting it.

**(Edna's house)**

Edna goes back to the house and she sees Nazz painting May's toenails and Edna is getting over her anger and says, "Cousin Nazz... May is going to have to live with me... I CAN'T BELIEVE THOSE TWO!" May then asks, "What did happen and what did you do?" Edna replies, "It turns out that those two won't even return the money they stole from the Eds in return for you, they even said you're not worth it."

May gasps and then starts crying. Edna then continues, "So I told them they suck and instead of flinging a chocolate bar at them I flung d..." Nazz interrupts her and says, "Whoa Edna! They really got you mad but I don't blame them... If I had siblings I would love them no matter what... Oh May I'm so sorry!" May then says, "That's ok, I have a real family right here... or better yet a "nakama"!" Edna then blushes a bit.

The Eds show up and Eddy then shouts, "HEY EDNA! DID THE SKANKERS GIVE US BACK OUR MONEY LIKE YOU SAID THE PLAN WOULD?" Eddy then sees a rather annoyed May and says, "Oops! I forgot you were here!" May then says, "That's ok, they are real jerks anyway, they refuse to return your money in order to get me back... I mean they don't even care if it was all a hoax... they don't even care about me!" May then starts crying.

Eddy then shivers and then he says, "I don't know what's going on with me but..." Eddy then hugs May and she giggles a bit as he says, "Help...Me!" Double D snickers and says, "Sorry Eddy, I guess your inner subconcious is telling you that if there was ever a moment to feel very very very very sorry for some misfortunate individual... plus she saved your life!"

Eddy then says, "Well I'll let this go... Geez what's next? A member of Cobra saves a member of G.I. JOE? **(Action Force to you non-American readers)** A Decepticon saves a Autobot? A Renegade Gobot rescues a Guardian Gobot... I bet no one would get that one!"

May then asks Eddy, "You like Transformers too?" Eddy then says, "Of course... but when we play with the toys I always play Megatron!" Ed then responds, "It is because Megatron is bad and evil like you Eddy!" Eddy then says, "Well at least I'm not a two-timing psycho like Starscream!" Double D just stares at Eddy and says, "Remember those times you would choose getting jawbreakers over us in a scam?" Eddy turns red and replies, "Touche' Double D!"

Edna then goes to her room asks Double D to follow her. Double D follows her and he cannot believe what she is seeing in there... the room is decorated with 80's memborillia and has a celestial theme and when Edna turns off the lights the stars on the ceiling are glowing and are in the correct alignments. Edna then says to Double D, "I just thought you like seeing stars too!" Doule D replies, "Yes Edna, they're beautiful!" Ed, Eddy, May, and Nazz also show up and are amazed by the illuminating ceiling.

Eddy turns on the lights and says, "... What's with the 80's stuff in the room?" Edna then replies, "... Well what's with the 70's stuff in YOUR room?" Eddy and Edna then look at eachother for a long period of time until Eddy replies, "... You're alright Edna!"

So the other Eds go to their houses but Eddy has plans in the morning.

**NEXT TIME: Gone Fishing!**


	5. Gone Fishin'

**Ed, Edd, Eddy, n Edna**

By Technomaru

Chapter 5: Gone Fishin'

The author will stop using the word "Ed" in a chapter title and will now go under the name "Technomaru"

Note: I do not own Ed, Edd, n Eddy...but "The Fourth Ed" is mine!

This is a spin-off of "The Grim ED-ventures of Ed, Edd, n Eddy". I always wondered what if Edna existed in the "Ed, Edd, n Eddy" canon and...THIS STORY DOES NOT CONTAIN SUPERNATURAL ELEMENTS!

Also I reconned that this fanfic takes place in June so that the summer can last longer.

Ok at first I picture the fanfic's opening theme as "Mononoke Dance" from Hakaba Kitaro due to the fact it's a seperate story from "The Grim ED-ventures of Ed, Edd n Eddy" but since the 4 chapter introduction arc is over the new opening theme will be "Love Together" from the undubbed Parappa the Rapper anime... that's right it exists! I also picture a OP where the four Eds and May and Nazz dance to this song in disco attire due to the song sounding like a 70's hit.

Sorry for the long wait, I've been busy, me and my nakama met Adam West and Pamelyn Ferdin, everything's awesome!

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**Last Time: Sure enough, Lee and Marie don't seem to want May back and so she stays with Edna... and is very happy about it! Eddy's up to something, so Edna will find out soon enough!**

**(The next early morning)**

Eddy pulls out some supplies from his garage and is about to sneak out. Eddy then sees Edna in her nightgown and Pajamas shining a flashlight at him asking, "Ok Eddy what are you up to and I hope it doesn't involve hurting yourself in the process... you're wearing a fisherman's cap? Carrying a basket, bait...hooks. A ROD!"

Eddy responds, "Yeah I'm going fishing, no harm in that!"

Edna's eyes widen and she says to Eddy, "You're going fishing... I want to learn how to fish... can I join you... (cute voice) pweeze?" Eddy sweats and as he gulps he responds, "...Umm... sure! Meet me at the Creek, I'll be on my dad's Dinghy" Edna just giggles and walks back to her house.

**(Later that morning)**

Eddy is loading the dinghy and then he hears voices behind the bushes. It's non other than Edna and May Kanker in sailor outfits, complete with sailor caps. Edna then says as she salutes, "Ok Captain Eddy, we'll help you fish!" Eddy then says, "First off if I wanted to get sick off of cute stuff I'd watch "Snow Fairy Sugar", and second why is she here... and why are you wearing the sailor suits?"

Edna replies, "Well I thought we'd dress appropriately if we're going to help you fish, second you must've forgotten that May's cool and she says to be a good fisher too." May pulls out a box of cocoa puffs breakfast cereal bars and hands one to Eddy. Eddy then says, "Boy do I feel like a jerk.... but as long as she doesn't scare the fish she can join now get into the dinghy!"

So the two get into Eddy's dad's dinghy and they sail to the middle of the creek. May asks Eddy, "Umm aren't Ed and Double D going to join us?" Eddy then replies, "Umm... they're not supposed to know about my scam because if they did then I'd be a total laughing stock... anyway the scam is that there is rumours of a fish that grants wishes if you spare it's life.

Edna laughs and tells Eddy, "You actually believe in such a cockamamie story?" Eddy then replies, "Well in case if that rumour is really bullpucky we can use the fish we already caught for selling in my "Fish Market" scam or... just have them for lunch!" Edna then says, "Well that sounds like a good plan!"

Kevin rides his bike and near the creek and says, "Ha.. what are ya? "The Pirates of DORK water? Oh geez Edna's here!" Edna then says, "That's right I'm here, just fishing with my "nakama" and just be glad you're on land because I'd take that hat of yours and expose that bald spot to everyone!" Kevin blushes in embarassment and just rides away. Eddy laughs out loud and May is suprised and says to Edna, "Wow... You actually stood up to Kevin, no one's ever able to do that before!" Edna replies, "Well Cousin Nazz told me how he works and sure enough that's how I'm able to stand up to him if he is being a "meanie-bo-beanie" again... but I had no idea he was a fan of "Pirates of Dark Water"

So the three continue going fishing. Then May takes off her shoes and tells Edna, "I think it's time to wash my socks!" Then as she puts her socks in the water, Edna is a bit disgusted as well as Eddy by the strong smell but to their suprise... the fish bit into the sock and May dragged it into the boat, and as she puts the sock back into the boat, another fish bit into it and dragged the sock back into the boat.

Eddy looks at her and comments, "Whoa! That's amazing May!" Edna replies, "Yeah May... but your feet look very gross.... nothing but a manicure, lotion, and the works can't do! (to Eddy) Umm Eddy... howcome you don't want anyone to know about you fishing?" Eddy replies, "Well first off this is a very personal thing and also if anyone else know about it, they will ruin the whole thing and they would scare away the fish! I know these things because my brother is a whiz at fishing.

Edna then perks her eyes and says, "Hey that reminds me, my older sister has a boyfriend who is said to be a whiz at everything, is this your brother?" The minute she takes a photo out from her pocket Eddy pulls out a photo from his pocket and soon enough they finally realized something...

Edna and Eddy shout at the same time, "YOUR SIBLING IS DATING MY SIBLING!" Both of them are shocked and says, "If your brother marries my sister then we'd be cousins!" Eddy then says, "Then if your sister marries my brother then that means I would never have a chance with Nazz because she would be my cousin!"

May then says, "Think about it like this guys, your siblings will find true happiness together and that is important... if they are happy then you are happy!" Eddy then says, "You know... that does make sense... even if it came from a Kanker!" Edna then corrects Eddy, "Eddy! You shouldn't be prejudice towards May like that... just for that you have to make her happy somehow!"

Eddy then looks at May and says to her, "*Sigh* What do you want me to do to make you happy?" May grins and whispers to Eddy and Eddy makes a shocked reaction and says, "Nuh uh... it's stupid, lame, and mushy! Plus that movie stinks!" Edna then says, "Eddy... please do this for her..." May responds, "Yeah if you do this, I'll give you a special treat at the house... it can be anything..." Eddy then says, "Well ok..."

Eddy and May Kanker are in the front of the dinghy, Eddy places May in front of him and says to her, "Hold on, hold on, keep your eyes closed!" May then says, "I don't know, the last time I heard this Lee slashed my hair and showed me a mirror." Eddy couldn't believe what he just heard and just says, "No...THIS!" May opens her eyes as Eddy holds out her arms and with a smile she yells out, "I'm flying! just like from "Titanic"! I guess Edna does enjoy make her friends happy!"

Edna then replies, "look at me, Eddy, I'm making people happy! I'm the magical girl, from Happy Land, who lives in a gumdrop house on Lolly Pop Lane! . . . By the way I was imitating a classic line from "The Simpsons" and now I'm going to sing a shanty to match this situation."

And with that she sings "My Heart will Go On" while May is enjoying this and Eddy's being disgusted with this and says to her, "Umm Edna... please don't tell anyone about this... and I'll give you fifty cents from my next scam!" Edna replies, "Well I would have to tell Double D since we're betting that you have a heart... so far I'm winning and I'm gonna use that money for jawbreakers tomorrow!" Eddy then says, "Jack...pot! Umm... Enjoying this May?" May then says, "Thank you Eddy...oh no... what are they doing here?"

The three then see Lee and Marie on a raft made out of a mattress and the sails are made out of sheets. Marie looks through binoculars and tells me, "There they are! And WHAT'S EDDY DOING!" Lee then looks through them and boy is she mad! Lee then says, "I was hoping Eddy would do that for me... either way let's get back at that crazy girl, get May back and bring Eddy home for supper!"

Edna sees the ship and tells Eddy, "Eddy hide May, I'll deal with those savages. (To Kankers) What do you two want?" Was it because I took May from you and flinging "doodie" in your trailer for not wanting her back?"

Lee responds to Edna, "No, not just for flinging "doodie" in our trailer or taking May for us, We're talking about spray painting the word "Killer" in the back of our home!" Edna responds, "What! Never! Graffiti isn't my thing, it's more of your thing, I'd have to be a despicable punk like yourselves to do such a thing!"

Lee and Marie clench their teeth in anger and Edna continues, "Second of all you girls treat her like trash, you don't seem to like her very much, and when she was in "danger" you refused to help...so why do you want her back?"

Lee then responds, "Because we're complexed! Umm I mean we just do! So hand her over!"

Edna then notices May being shaken at the idea of being back in the trailer and with a look of bravery on her face, Edna responds with a "...NO!"

Edna then adds, "NO! She likes it better living with me and hanging out with Cousin Nazz and my "nakama"! We treat her as if she's one of us, I share my fine selection of fashion with her and we strangly have the same size, she's never had friends before and when she met me we got her and she is totally a new person, I've changed her for the best and all you guys do to her is enslave her and treat her pretty badly... I mean if she stepped on a nail on the floor would you guys help her?"

Lee and Marie then look at eachother and Eddy replies, "That's right! I saw Double D removing the nail and giving her that stuff in that white box with a red cross on it!" Edna then says, "So if you monsters ever want May back you'd have to go through me!" Edna then softly bonks Eddy on the head and Eddy replies, "Yeah and me too... I guess!"

Then Lee pulls out a 2x4 and tries to swing at Edna. Edna then grabs the 2x4 and tells Eddy, "Ok, man the dinghy, I'm going in!"

Edna jumps on the Kanker's raft and after she tells Eddy and May "Cover your ears!" Then she softly sings "Orinoco Flow" by Enya to Lee and Marie. They suddenly get drowsy and Lee yells out, "Cut that out! Geez that song is cheesey and lame, yet irritably soothing at the same time!" Edna kept singing until Lee and Marie fall asleep and then Edna jumps back on the Dinghy and kicks the raft back to where the trailer is located.

May then unplugs her ears and says, "Wow, that's amazing... and you really refuse to give up on me?" Edna then says, "Of course, we're nakama! We always stick together through thick and thin... now let's get out of here before they wake up, we already caught enough fish for the day now let's do something about those feet!"

Eddy cannot believe all this is happening... but on the bright side he realizes he got alot of fish, his dinghy wasn't recked, and Lee didn't have the chance to attack him.

**(The afternoon at Edna's house)**

The three go into the house and see Ed and Double D conversating, Ed says to Double D, "I heard that Edna's so tough that she bought a nightlight and it's not because she's afraid of the dark it because the dark is afraid of her!" Double D chuckles and Ed then says, "I heard that when the Boogeyman goes to sleep every night, he checks the closet for Edna!" Double D laughs even harder and Ed continues, "If you Google search "Edna getting her butt kicked by the Kanker Sisters" you will generate zero results. it just doesn't happen!"

Edna hears everything Ed says and she glomps him and says, "That's so nice of you Ed, you're making "facts" about me to show that I'm a tough girl!

Double D then says, "Hey Eddy, where did you go?" Eddy then says, "Umm I don't want to talk about it but at least I know what we're going to have for dinner!"

**(Later at Edna's house)**

Edna is giving May a heavy duty pedicure and making her feet look and smell it's bestest while The three Eds try out the sushi Edna and her mom made out of rice, seaweed, and the fish Eddy caught. May then says, "Hey Eddy, I have something for you."

Eddy then sees a present and opens it saying, "I hope it's mone...Hey... it's the hypno-hat from the episode "Look into my Eds" thanks May. I'm going to see if it actually works..."

With one hypnotizing blast from his hat... Ed looks into it as Eddy says, "You will become the one thing May keeps asking for!"

Sure enough, Ed thinks he is a monkey and he is dancing around while Eddy laughs out loud. May then says, "Pretty funny but it doesn't seem right." Ed then throws something brown at May's face and she says, "Ewww I hope it's chocolate." But then she sees that Ed is eating peanut butter.

Ed suddenly snaps out of it and takes the hat from Eddy and puts it on, he says to Eddy, "You are a clown!" And then Eddy puts on a red nose and acts like a clown. Edna screams and shivers in fear but then Ed hypnotizes her and says to her, "You are the Warden of Superjail!" Then Edna goes up to the now frighten Eddy dressed in a feminine version of the Warden's outfit. and says to him while making a creepy grin, "Well hello there, you're in Superjail, I'm the Warden and you are a criminal! You might not be John Wayne Gacy but you will do!

May then says, "Maybe giving back that hat was a bad idea... I wonder whatever happened to my sisters?" Double D then says, "Yeah you're right May and I recall you mention someone graffitied their home... if Edna would do such a thing then who did?"

**(Meanwhile, at the Park n Flush Trailer Park)**

After they wake up from their unintentional nap, Lee and Marie discover slashmarks on their tires and a knife slashed into one of the tires and the handle reads "Killers Rule! Kankers Drool!"

**Next Time:** Edna goes against Kevin in a videogame contest that is straight from a certain movie... be there!


	6. Queen of Kong 3

**Ed, Edd, Eddy, n Edna**

By Technomaru

Chapter 6: Queen of Kong 3: A Fistful of Quarters

Note: I do not own Ed, Edd, n Eddy...but "The Fourth Ed" is mine!

This is a spin-off of "The Grim ED-ventures of Ed, Edd, n Eddy". I always wondered what if Edna existed in the "Ed, Edd, n Eddy" canon and...THIS STORY DOES NOT CONTAIN SUPERNATURAL ELEMENTS! But it does contain 80's parodies!

Also I reconned that this fanfic takes place in June so that the summer can last longer.

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The three male Eds come over to Edna's house and they find themselves greeted by May Kanker. Ed panics and May then says, "But I'm a good guy now!" Ed replies, "Shut up Jiggl..." Eddy interrupts Ed and says, "Oh come on Ed, that joke is so old the last time I heard it I was in the Land of the Lost!" Double D then corrects Eddy, "That's "fall of a dinosaur" I don't think anyone knows what "Land of the Lost" is... until the movie comes out that is!

Ed sees Edna playing a videogame for the old Nintendo Entertainment System and it shows a little man in overalls spraying bug spray at some bugs and the butt of a giant monkey. Ed is mesmerized by what he is seeing and Double D asks May, "Umm May, what is Edna doing and how long has it been?" May then says to Double D, "Ever since the news of a "Donkey Kong 3" tournament is the main attraction of "Video Armageddon" Edna has been training for this event.

Double D then says, "Well I haven't heard from Kevin so he might be training too... plus it seems that Edna and Kevin are the only ones here with a working Nintendo Entertainment System... by the way I never heard of the game, what is "Donkey Kong 3" about anyway?" Eddy then says, "I don't know about you but it's funny to see a giant monkey get sprayed in the tuckus with bug spray."

Edna paused the game and looks at her fellow Eds.... and May.

**(The following stuff that Edna says is actually true... if you don't believe me then go read Wikipedia!)**

Edna then says to them, "Ok, Donkey Kong 3 is a classic 1986 Nintendo game for the Arcade and the NES, it's about a greenhouse that is terrorized not only by bugs but Donkey Kong himself. In place of Mario as the protagonist is Stanley the Bugman. The object of the game is to shoot insect repellent at Kong to drive him to the top of the screen while avoiding and shooting insects. the player must protect five plants at the bottom of the screen from being carried off by the various insects.

The three Eds and May are shocked by this and Double D then says, "Well...that...was...interesting. I knew some Nintendo game series have the unusual entries such as the Zelda games for the Phillips CD...." Edna covers Double D's mouth and says, "Shush Double D, what are you trying to do? Make fans mad at us for bringing up that awful Youpoop fodder?" Anyway I got to get back to training."

May then says, "In that case I'll help you out!" Nazz goes into the house and says, "I just heard you're competing, I'll help you out too Cousin, now all we need is a 80's themed montage!"

**Edna goes through training for the tournament as she continuously plays "Donkey Kong 3". And through the training the song "The Touch" by Stan Rush plays in the background. Edna is wearing a headband and leg warmers.**

**(THE BIG DAY)**

A video arena opens in the middle of the Cul-De-Sac Video Armageddon, a convention where kids play free arcade games and they get free packets of "Super Mario Bros. fruit snacks". Jimmy finds a blue princess in his packet and he gets a free T-shirt that reads, "I saved the Princess"

The "Donkey Kong 3" tournament was beginning. Just to show off, Kevin shows up in a "pimped up" Bike, then Edna shows up dressed in her 80's attire such as her headband, legwarmers, overgrown blue shirt and red pants.

Edna gets a little nervous but then she thinks of her happy place and smiles happily...

**(Edna imagines herself in a room with May Kanker filled with 99 red balloons and they are dancing to "99 Luftballons" playing in the background)**

The two exchange words before the tournament:

Kevin: What's with the "thrift store" look, there is no way you're related to Nazz!

Edna: What's with the bike? Is it to distract the fact you have a big bald spot under your hat?

Kevin: If you mention my hat one more time I'll...

Then the tournament begins, in over a hour the two were working hard towards the highest score, Edna begins to stress out, then she thought about her happy place again...

**(Edna imagines herself in a room with May Kanker filled with 99 red balloons and they are dancing to "99 Luftballons" playing in the background)**

However as she wakes up she noticed she lost her last life and lost the tournament. As Kevin won he goes up to Edna and says, "Haw haw! check out the final score!"

**Edna's score 1,049,100**

**Kevin's score 1,050,200**

Kevin then continues, "Nice try... DORKette! Haw Haw!" Then two shadowy figures grab Kevin and take him to what appears to be a prison bus.

Nazz then runs to Edna while shouting, "Edna don't win! I know what the "grand prize" is! Oh you're ok!" Edna then says, "Umm what happened to Kevin?" Nazz then says, "Ok it turns out the "grand prize" is the winner is sent to a actual greenhouse to spray at bugs and at a gorilla's tuckus!" Edna replies, "Weird, I thought we were parodying "The King of Kong: Fistful of Quarters" not "The Last Starfighter!"

Double D hears about this and says, "Shouldn't we save Kevin?" then everyone is silent as if they don't want to do anything about it... However Edna thinks to herself, "Glad that wasn't me!"

Edna then says, "Well since we're making fun of 80's stuff in this chapter, how about we go back to my house and watch "SPIRAL ZONE" on DVD?" Eddy then says, "You sure got alot of 80's cartoons on DVD Edna!" Edna replies, "Better than those "frisky magazines" your brother left you!" Eddy blushes and says, "Ix-nay on the isky-fray agazines-may!" Edna then replies, "And besides, I know Ed would like that series but Spiral Zone was a cool forgotten sci-fi series, it's a cross between "GI JOE", "Mad Max", and "Dawn of the Dead"."

**(SPIRAL ZONE is a actual 80's series...)**

Double D then asks Edna, "Umm Edna, is Spiral Zone based on a toyline?" Edna then looks down and says, "...yes... Well let's get back to the house before Kevin somehow escapes and declairs vengence on me."

So as they were walking back to Edna's house to watch "Spiral Zone" on DVD, Ed asks Edna, "Umm what is your happy place Edna?" Edna then replies while smiling, "Hmmm...."

**(Edna imagines herself in a room with May Kanker.... Ed, Edd, Eddy, and Nazz that is filled with 99 red balloons and they are all dancing to "99 Luftballons" playing in the background)**

Two Hours later, Ed finds himself addicted to the NES game "Burgertime" but that's another story!

**Next time:**** Edna discovers the REAL reason why Kevin keeps calling the Eds "DORKS" Find out what it is next time!**


	7. Edna vs Kevin

**Ed, Edd, Eddy, n Edna**

By Technomaru

Chapter 7: Edna vs Kevin!

Note: I do not own Ed, Edd, n Eddy...but "The Fourth Ed" is mine!

This is a spin-off of "The Grim ED-ventures of Ed, Edd, n Eddy". I always wondered what if Edna existed in the "Ed, Edd, n Eddy" canon and...THIS STORY DOES NOT CONTAIN SUPERNATURAL ELEMENTS!

I apologize for the violence in the second half of the story and the rude jokes about Kevin's "problem" but hey, there HAS to be a reason why he keeps calling the Eds "dorks" also who here wanted to get back at Kevin for what he did to Eddy in the episode "Your Ed here?"

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Morning comes and then Edna wakes up and looks at her VHS collection. May gets up and sees her going through the collection and says to her "BFF", "Morning Edna, what's up?"

Edna replies, "Well May I'm going through the VHS collection of 80's stuff my older sister left me an... AHA! I FOUND IT! Oh you and the Eds will like this movie!" Edna then shows May a VHS tape labeled "Twice Upon a Time- HBO version"

**(The movie does exist! And I saw both versions!)**

May asks Edna, "Umm what's Twice Upon a Time? And howcome I never heard of it?"

Edna then answers, "Oh c'mon May, Cartoon Network showed it a couple months ago! Ok, I'll tell you the complexed plot of this forgotten stop motion 80's classic in a way you can understand it... oh and THE George Lucas was involved with it!"

"Once upon a time, there were some people called the Rushers of Din. Each night as they slept, sweet dreams were delivered to them from sunny Frivoli, while nightmares came to them from the mysterious Murkworks. But the malevolent master of the Murk, Synonamess Botch, was not content. He wanted the Rushers to have non-stop nightmares. To do that, he would need to gain control of the Cosmic Clock. To accomplish this, he kidnaps the deliverers of the dreams, Greensleeves and the Figmen of Imagination, and then tricks Ralph, the All-Purpose Animal and his pal Mumford into stealing the mainspring from the Cosmic Clock. Realizing they've been tricked, Ralph and Mumford try to get the spring back and prevent Botch from unleashing his nightmare bombs. Along the way, they get help from their Fairy Godmother, Greensleeves' niece Flora Fauna, the junior varsity superhero Rod Rescueman, and Botch's own head nightmare writer, Scuzzbopper."

May then coments, "Wow, you sure know alot about the 80's Edna, I wonder if Eddy knows alot about the 70's too."

Edna then says, "Also two versions of the movie exists, one that was shown on HBO has bad words in it and one one Showtime and Cartoon Network had no bad words in it... and big sis taped the HBO copy!"

Edna and May hear the screams of three boys and Edna says, "Oh good, the boys came to see me... What's up Ed....uh oh!" Double D then says to Edna as he catches his breath, "Edna... watch out... Kankers...they have a wrecking ball!"

Sure enough,Lee and Marie Kanker show up in a crane that they are somehow driving and it is equipped with a wrecking ball. Lee then says, "It's payback time Edna! And yes we know where you live!" Marie operates the crane and is about to use the wrecking ball to destroy Edna's house but it accidentally destroys the top of Kevin's house.

Kevin is taking a bath and upon seeing this he yells out, "What the heck man!" Then as bathtub slides off the floor he shouts, "No no no no no no!" Then he and the bathtub falls out of the house and smashes on Kevin's front lawn, leaving him bare naked... just like that guy on that show "American Boy"... or was it "Family Man"?

Lee and Marie see this and they drive away with Lee saying, "Let's get out of here... he might not have "homeowner's insurance!" Marie giggles and says, "You said "homeowner"."

Kevin gets up and then he sees Edna. Edna then says, "Geez man, sorry about what those two did an... umm why do you wear your hat in the bath? Unless it involves your bal..."

Kevin gets annoyed and says to her, "Let it rest! I just like wearing it!"

**(If you readers ever see the EEnE episode "A Boy & His Ed" he does wear his hat in the bath! I dunno why he does it either)**

But then Edna sees something shocking between Kevin's legs...

Edna then tries to hold in her laughter and then with a sheepish grin she says, "Oh...so...that's why you keep calling the Eds "dorks"...AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA YOU CALL THEM DORKS....BECAUSE YOU REALLY ARE COMPENSATING FOR SOMETHING, YOU HAVE A TINY LIL DO..."

Kevin covers Edna's mouth and says, "Please don't tell anyone, I'll do anything!"

Edna then says, "Well well well... looks like you're about to have a taste of your own medicine!" Kevin then says, "What do you mea...oh no... did Eddy tell you?" Edna replies, "Yes...he did, he told me that when you found out his middle name was Skipper, you blackmailed him by making him buy him a soda, dress up as Jimmy, Kiss Edd, Do Seal tricks, Eat a fish, and act like he wet himself when Kevin squirts him with a watergun...AND YOU TOLD EVERYONE ANYWAY!"

Kevin then says, "Yeah I remember that episode "Your Ed here", Double D's middle name was funnier! Umm hey wait are you going to do what I think you're going to do?"

Edna then says, "Well since I know your secret I'm telling everyone about this...even Nazz!"

Kevin grabs Edna's legs and he says, "Wait! Look I'm sorry, and I apologize to Eddy about what I did... please don't tell everyone and especially Nazz!"

Edna then shrugs him off and says, "Sorry Kevin but you made your ring, now wrestle in it!" Kevin then goes inside his house and puts on his clothes and runs off screaming, "EDNA! NO! DON'T TE... oh no!"

Soon a festival is being held in the middle of the Cul-de-sac and hotdogs are givin out for free and Kevin sees Edna and May cooking the hotdogs. Sarah goes up to Kevin and says, "Check it out Kevin, this hot dog is huge!" Nazz laughs when she eats her hotdog, and Johnny 2x4 then says to Kevin, "Wow! so that's why you keep calling the Eds dorks because your dork is smaller than this hotdog!"

Kevin gets so angry and Edna then says to him, "What's up "teeny weeny"?" Kevin then says, "How could you! I didn't even do anything to you!" Edna replies, "It's not what you did to me... It's what you did to Eddy! You did the same thing to Eddy! So it isn't funny when it happens to you now does it?" Eddy then says, "That's right! My middle name might be "Skipper" but you have a tiny dork! AHAHAHA!"

Double D then says, "Well even though I don't approve of Edna's plan, Kevin should deserve his comeuppance once in a while... plus he made Eddy kiss me during the "skipper incident" so therefore I don't blame you Edna." Ed looks down his pants and says, "Mine's bigger than Kevin's!" Then he pulls a relish dog out of his pants and eats it.

Kevin is so furious at all this, that he grabs Edna's glasses and breaks them and laughs in his usual cruel way, then he sees May Kanker and says, "Geez Nazz's genepool is more like a cesspool.... her friend is a dog! Haw Haw Haw!. Edna shivers, remembers all the mean things Kevin has done to the Eds, and so she looks at Kevin with flames in her eyes and says in a unusual calm way...

"You can steal my butter, you can eat my bread... BREAK MY GLASSES AND HURT MY "NAKAMA", AND CONSIDER YOURSELF DEAD!"

**(This scene would be more awesome when you play the song "Bring Me to Life" by Evanescence at the point where it gets really cool)**

And with that Edna grabs Kevin by the collar and slaps him around. Kevin steps back and pulls out plank and then he attempts to strike Edna with it but then she dodges it only for him to miss and Johnny takes Plank from him. Kevin and Edna then start punching eachother only for Kevin to have his tooth knocked out and Edna has a bruise on her arm.

Kevin is grabbing Edna by the hair, only for her to pull out some hotdogs and stuffs them into Kevin's mouth and while he is confused by this she jumps at him and they both fall into the ground.

Kevin then picks up mud and throws it at Edna's face, causing her to fall to the ground but not before she grabs Kevin's pants and they fall down, revealing to everyone that there was a reason why Kevin had a thing for the word "Dork" so everyone but Nazz laughs at him, she is shocked at Kevin's actions.

Kevin pulls up his pants and says to Edna, "Nazz's cousin or not, you are so dead!" Kevin plans to kick Edna on the side but Edna grabs Kevin's leg and makes him trip, and then Edna starts pummeling him while saying, "You asked for this!"

As the two fight Lee and Marie show up. Lee then says, "After Kevin's done I want a piece of her!" But then they sees how roughed up Kevin is and Edna then says, "Want some of this too!" Marie is shocked and grabs Lee and runs off. Lee asks Marie, "Hey I wanted to fight her!" Marie then says, "Lee if there is something you should remember is that if you see someone beating up Kevin then that means we're no match for that person! Also I think she knocked out one of his teeth!"

The fight lasted for 8 minutes and Kevin is in a rougher shape. Nazz then jumps in and shouts, "STOP IT! JUST STOP IT! Just what are you fighting about anyway?"

Edna then says, "Ok cousin, this "jerkweed" has been mean to the Eds for a long time and blackmailed Eddy to keep a secret and told everyone anyway, then I finally discover his secret and did the same thing to him only it made him break my glasses and continued to do mean things to the Eds... plus he said something that made May cry.

Nazz is shocked and says, "But Kevin says he likes to joke around alot, he doesn't mean those things!" Edna is shocked and says, "So let me get this straight... when Kevin acts like a "jerkweed" to the Eds you just laugh and assume he is joking... are you that "blonde"? No offence May." May responds "Non taken!"

Nazz then looks at Kevin and says to him in a stern way, "You lied to me! First you said you were joking with the Eds when you made Eddy kiss Double D, then it turns out you liked to harass Eddy and then you broke my cousin's glasses and found it funny..."

Everyone was shocked as Nazz slaps Kevin as hard as she could! Nazz then walks away, saying, "I thought you would make boyfriend material but in the end, you really are a...

**DORK!**... Plus now I know why you're obsessed with that word... "teeny weenie"! C'mon Edna, I'll get my mom to help you get new glasses!"

As Nazz walks away with Edna, Edna then says to everyone, "I apologize for my action but I do not tolerate bullies at all and my older sister tells me nothing good comes out of them... c'mon May!"

So the three walk away.

Eddy looks at Kevin and says, "Wow... looks like you finally got what's coming to you!" Kevin is speechless by what has happened. So the Eds just walks out of there, unaware that Rolf is making off with all the sausages while no one's looking.

**(Edna's house)**

Everyone is watching the HBO version of "Twice Upon a Time", May then says, "Can cartoon characters really say such words in a 80's animated movie?" Double D then replies, "Well that's what happens when you hire improve comedians to do a animated movie, especially Marshal Efron!" Ed watches it and says, "That "all purpose animal" sounds like Garfield!"

Edna is on the couch, unable to see good because of her nearsightedness and she says, "Darn that Kevin, now I have to wait for chapter 8 for a new pair of glasses, just what did you see in him anyway cousin Nazz?" Nazz replies, "He was good looking, athletic, had alot in common with him, but I was a fool to not see through for who he is, plus I know by now that you don't tolerate bullies at all! Especially Kevin and those two Kanker Sisters!"

Eddy then asks, "You really did a number on him, how did you learn to fight?" Edna replies, "My older sister is a whiz at fighting, especially those who like to bully, I hate bullies!" Eddy then says, "My older brother is a whiz at stuff to... oh right he's dating your older sister, umm what's her name?"

Edna replies, "It's Emily, Emily Erma Espinoza... what's your older brother's name?"

Eddy then says, "Well my older brother's name is...

**WE INTERRUPT THIS FANFIC FOR THE FOLLOWING NEWS!**

In the next chapter Edna's friends discover her true fear... what is it? have you been following the hints? you did? good! Then stick around for the next chapter you luckies... bye nii!


	8. COULROPHOBIA!

**Ed, Edd, Eddy, n Edna**

By Technomaru

Chapter 8: COULROPHOBIA!

Note: I do not own Ed, Edd, n Eddy...but "The Fourth Ed" is mine!

This is a spin-off of "The Grim ED-ventures of Ed, Edd, n Eddy". I always wondered what if Edna existed in the "Ed, Edd, n Eddy" canon and...THIS STORY DOES NOT CONTAIN SUPERNATURAL ELEMENTS!

However this chapter is a remake of chapter 53 of "The Grim ED-ventures of Ed, Edd, n Eddy" and it was in turn inspired by that one episode of billy and mandy and when Katherine (my kitten) was chasing after the curser but when I clicked to the image of Buggy the Clown from ONE PIECE she got terrified at the sight of him and ran to the other part of the room (that's what happens if you look at Buggy's laughing face too close if you're a kitten) I find this cute and funny!

INPORTANT NOTE: Edna is a coulrophobic and that condition is real... so it's not funny! If you see someone who is coulrophobic please... DO NOT put on a clown nose and go "raggle fraggle!" Thank you!

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Nazz goes to Edna's house and looks for her, Nazz then hears the shower running thinking, "Edna must be taking a shower... I guess I should wait for her..."

Nazz sits on the couch, she becomes board and starts reading a issue of "Star", then she picks up her Cell Phone and calls Sarah:

Nazz: Hi Sarah!

Sarah: What's up Nazz, are you alright from yesterday?

Nazz: Yes... I'm at Edna's house, I have her glasses ready!

Sarah: That's good. So have you seen Kevin lately?

Nazz: Well I never want to see or hear from him ever again now that I know what he's like. I think Edna's getting out of the shower so I will call you back, bye nii!

Nazz hangs up her cell phone and sees Edna in her bathrobe. Edna then asks, "What's up cousin?" Nazz just giggles and hands Edna a new pair of glasses with blue frames. So Edna puts on her glasses and then she sees what appears to be May in a clown costume, upon seeing her Edna faints.

**(10 minutes later)**

Edna wakes up as May asks her, "Are you ok Edna? I even took off the costume used for Eddy's circus scam... his parents cut off his allowance so he had me help him make money for the Nintendo Wii.

Nazz then looks at May and says, "You actually think scamming quarters from kids would afford a Wii? It can't even afford a Nintendo DS!" May then asked "Nazz, why did Edna freak out when she saw my costume?" Nazz then says, "Umm.... you really want to know?"

Edna gets sweaty and then hears a knock at the door, Nazz opens it and sees Kevin on his knees and says, "Oh please Nazz! Please let me be your boyfriend again! I promise to never treat the dor...I mean the Eds mean ever again... I'll even take May and Edna to Townsville somehow!" Nazz coldly says to him... "leave me alone... I never want to see you again!" Kevin feels rejected and walks away while sad violin music plays in the background.

Then the Eds show up, Eddy is dressed as a ring master, Double D is dressed as a lion tamer, and Ed is dressed as a clown. Eddy then says, "Where's Edna! Her friend wanted in on our Circus scam so gotta get her for our sc... Ed where did you go?"

Edna sees Ed in his clown uniform and Shrieks and falls to the ground, in a fetal position, saying the phrase "Can't sleep, clowns will eat me" over and over. May then says, "Edna acted like that when she saw me in this costume, umm is there something Nazz didn't tell me and the other Eds?"

Nazz then says, "Actually there is... Edna is a Coulrophobic..."

Ed then says, "Well keep her away froun Kohl's! I know those stores are up to no good when they sell toothbrushes!" Eddy then says, "Ed you idiot! Coulrophobia isn't a fear of Kohl's department stores, it's a fear of...of...umm..."

Double D then adds, "Clowns, Edna has a fear of Clowns and I think Nazz is going to explain it all...

Nazz starts her story but all she needs is a flashback.....

**(Flashback begins)**

5 year old Edna comes home after kindergarden and see her sister Emily Erma Espinoza, about to watch a movie. Enda then says, "HI BIG SIS!" Emily then says, "Yo lil sis!" Edna then asks, "Can I watch movies with you pweeeeze?" Emily then says, "Umm actually I dunno but then again why not? I'm showing "CLOWNHOUSE", "Killer Klowns from Outer Space", "IT", and "Poltergeist". Edna then says, "meh".

(hours later)

Edna is in a fetal position and goes "Can't sleep, clowns will eat me, Can't sleep, clowns will eat me, Can't sleep, clowns will eat me, Can't sleep, clowns will eat me." Emily then says, I told you those movies are scary, but still those are just movies, clowns won't do such things ok?" Edna snaps out of it and ends up watching "Action Dastard".

**(Another Flashback)**

Emily then says to Edna as a 6 year old, "Umm dad made you a new bed, he knows you like horror and clowns so he made you this!" Edna sees a creepy clown bed and the next morning she is in a fetal position and goes "Can't sleep, clowns will eat me, Can't sleep, clowns will eat me, Can't sleep, clowns will eat me, Can't sleep, clowns will eat me."

**(Another Flashback)**

It was Edna's 7th birthday and when she opened her first present, it was a creepy "Charlie in a Box" with a sinister looking clown's head popping out of the box, Edna falls into a in a fetal position and goes "Can't sleep, clowns will eat me, Can't sleep, clowns will eat me, Can't sleep, clowns will eat me, Can't sleep, clowns will eat me."

**(Flashback ends)**

Double D then says, "Well that explains the two clown related hints in the previous chapters...

**(Flashback of chapter 1)**

Ed gives everyone a jawbreaker and as Edna sucks on one she feels so sad. Double D then says, "Edna... how did you learn how to fight like that? None of us can last 5 minutes with those two!" Edna then says, "As a nerdy girl, I have to learn how to fight back in self-defence... plus Nazz and my older sister taught me those moves." Eddy then says, "Yep, Glad to have you as one of us Edna, just wait till Nazz hears about this! Umm why are you so sad?"

Edna then says, "Oh it's nothing... nothing you would understand..." Double D then says, "Actually I know what it is... you're homesick right?" Edna then slowly shakes her head and says, "I know, how about we go watch a movie?" Ed then says, "I know one... KILLER KLOWNS FROM OUTER SPACE!" Edna shivers a bit. Eddy then says, "How about...The Dark Knight?" Edna whimpers a bit with a tear falling from her eye. Double D then notices this and says, "How about... GRINDHOUSE! A loving tribute to 70's grindhouse movies and it's a 2 in 1 movie... "PLANET TERROR" and "THUNDERBOL..." I mean "DEATH PROOF!"

Edna happily claps her hands and says, "Yay! I'll go for that!" Eddy then says, "But my big brother just got me "The Dark Knight" as a birthday gift!" Double D then says, "We're watching "Grindhouse" and that's final... plus Edna is a new member of our group and she did save us back there!"

**(Flashback of chapter 5)**

Ed suddenly snaps out of it and takes the hat from Eddy and puts it on, he says to Eddy, "You are a clown!" And then Eddy puts on a red nose and acts like a clown. Edna screams and shivers in fear but then Ed hypnotizes her and says to her, "You are the Warden of Superjail!" Then Edna goes up to the now frighten Eddy dressed in a feminine version of the Warden's outfit. and says to him while making a creepy grin, "Well hello there, you're in Superjail, I'm the Warden and you are a criminal! You might not be John Wayne Gacy but you will do!

**(Flashback ends)**

Edna snaps out of it and says, "Are the clownies gone?" Double D then says, "Yes they are Edna and don't worry, we won't tell anyone else about this and Coulrophobia is a common fear just like Eddy's peniaphobia... fear of poverty. Now let's go out and eat!"

Unaware to the others in the house, Kevin is spying at the others through a window but then something taps his shoulder and as he turns around, he sees Lee and Marie Kanker making sinister smiles. Lee then says to Kevin, "After we rough you up for no apparent reason, we're going to do alot worse to that crazy girl who thinks she's a Ed!"

Kevin makes a sinister smile too and says, "I want her pounded into ground beef too! And I know how to do it but first we need to form a alliance, put our differences aside, and get rid of Edna Together! And with Edna out of the picture we'll go back to ruining those dorks' days like we used to do!"

Kevin extends his hand and then the Kankers spits in their hands and Kevin looks at their hands and says, "Well anyway let's go get some costumes and props!

**(Peach Creek Streets)**

Double D, Nazz, May, and Edna go out while Ed and Eddy try to plan their next scam. When they went to the new restaurant "Burgertime", it turns out it's not finished so Double D then says, "That's too bad, let's go to McDo...uh oh!" Edna then sees a Mcdonalds and images of their clown mascot Ronald Mcdonald everywhere and she squeals in fear and shivers as she falls in a fetal position and goes "Can't sleep, clowns will eat me, Can't sleep, clowns will eat me, Can't sleep, clowns will eat me, Can't sleep, clowns will eat me." Double D then says, "Ok girls this will be the only time I say this... "My bad!" Then they roll Edna on the ground as they go to a fancy italian restaurant called "Il pagliaccio triste".

Edna snaps out of it and she says, "Hey I heard this restaurant serves the best pizza here, but I wonder what the name of the restaurant is in english?" Rolf happens to be eating here and says, "Hello Female Ed-girl! If you must know, "Il pagliaccio triste" is Italian for "The Sad Clown"... yes no hello goodbye!"

Edna shivers in fear but the worst is yet to come, a audioanimatronic clown in a black and white suit and pointed hat comes out of a curtain, it starts crying and singing "Vesti La Giubba" (amazingly) sung in correct Italian...

"Recitar! Mentre preso dal delirio, non so più quel che dico, e quel che faccio! Eppur è d'uopo, sforzati! Bah! sei tu forse un uom? Tu se' Pagliaccio! Vesti la giubba, e la faccia in farina. La gente paga, e rider vuole qua. E se Arlecchin t'invola Colombina, ridi, Pagliaccio, e ognun applaudirà! Tramuta in lazzi lo spasmo ed il pianto; in una smorfia il singhiozzo il dolor, Ah! Ridi, Pagliaccio, sul tuo amore infranto! Ridi del duol, che t'avvelena il cor!"

Edna see this and well... you know what she does. So the others just roll her out of the restaurant. A newspaper flies into May's face and Nazz grabs it and says, "Oh no....Get Edna back to the house, Peach Creek is holding a Clown convention so every Bozo and Blinky will be there.

Edna snaps out of it and says as they run to her house, "Thanks guys for trying to help me snap out of this, oh and for the record, despite being scared of clowns I have no problems with Mimes or Jesters... especially Scuzzbopper!"

Sarah, Jimmy, and Johnny go up to Edna and Jimmy says to her, "You were amazing yesterday Edna, despite being "friends" with Kevin he is also a bully to me and I'd do the same if I had that boomerang once more." Sarah then says, "You should hang out with us more, you're like the most bravest one in the Cul-de-sac!" Johnny, "More braver than the hero Captain Melonhead... who isn't me at all..."

The group heads off and Edna then says, "Sorry guys but I got to get back home, I'm...uhh...missing my show!"

**(Edna's house)**

Double D, May, Nazz, and Edna are just on the couch talking and then as Eddy and Ed are about to return to the house, Edna decides to watch TV with her friends, but she sees the following...

1. A episode of "Batman: the animated series" with you-know-who and Harley Quinn

2. A McDonalds Commercial

3. A episode of ONE PIECE where Luffy fights Buggy the Clown

4 "House of a 1,000 Corpses"

5. a episode of "the big comfty couch"

6. "Shakes the Clown"

7. a episode of Darkwing Duck with villian Quackerjack

8. a old WWF wrestling match with Doink the Clown

9. A episode of DIGIMON where the digidestined fight Piedmon

But then Edna is relieved that she's watching "Challenge of the Super-friends" and says "cool! Even though Joker isn't in the "Legion of doom" Riddler and Scarecrow are... but then she freaks out when she sees Toyman (he looks like a clown)

Eddy then says "I had enough of this! (opens door) HEY EDNA!, YOU GOT TO GET OVER THIS RIDICULOUS FEAR OF CLOWNS! Edna then replies angerly, "Who are you calling ridicu-mous? Well, what about your fear of Poverty? Eddy then suddenly falls to the floor and shivers, saying "Double D told you about that?"

Edna then replies, "You gotta believe me, Eddy! The clowns are nothing but ultimate evil! They want to be the dominate species on the planet, and they'll destroy us all to make it happen!! DESTROY US ALL!!! DESTROY US ALL! DESTROY US ALL! DESTROY US ALL! DESTROY US ALL! DESTROY US ALL! DESTROY US ALL! DESTROY US ALL! DESTROY US ALL! DESTROY US ALL! DESTROY US ALL! DESTROY US ALL! DESTROY US ALL! DESTROY US ALL! DESTROY US ALL! DESTROY US ALL! DESTROY US ALL! DESTROY US ALL! DESTROY US ALL! DESTROY US ALL! DESTROY US ALL! DESTROY US ALL! DESTROY US ALL! DESTROY US ALL! DESTROY US ALL! DESTROY US ALL! DESTROY US ALL! DESTROY US ALL! DESTROY US ALL! DESTROY US ALL! DESTROY US ALL! DESTROY US ALL! DESTROY US ALL! DESTROY US ALL! DESTROY US ALL! DESTROY US ALL! DESTROY US ALL!Oh look, I found a quarter... um I mean DESTROY US ALL! DESTROY US ALL! DESTROY US ALL! DESTROY US ALL! DESTROY US ALL! DESTROY US ALL! DESTROY US ALL! DESTROY US ALL! DESTROY US ALL! DESTROY US ALL! DESTROY US ALL! DESTROY US ALL! DESTROY US ALL! DESTROY US ALL! DESTROY US ALL! DESTROY US ALL! DESTROY US ALL! DESTROY US ALL! DESTROY US ALL! DESTROY US ALL! DESTROY US ALL! DESTROY US ALL! DESTROY US ALL! DESTROY US ALL! DESTROY US ALL! DESTROY US ALL! DESTROY US ALL! DESTROY US ALL! DESTROY US ALL!

As she says this she covers herself in what appears to be oranges, Eddy asks Edna "Now what's with all the oranges? Edna replies "They're not oranges, they're "tangellos". Double D replies "Okay, what's with all the tangelos?" And Edna replies "Clowns hate tangellos. Messes with their equilibrium."

Ed then says "Tangellos give me rashes!" Nazz then replies, "TMI!" May then asks Edna, "If you're so scared of clowns, how are you able to read "One Piece"? Edna then says, "I just ignore the arcs with Buggy the Clown in it such as the Buggy arc, the mini-Buggy arc, the Rougetown arc, and the Impel Down arc." Double D then says, "Perhaps if we give Edna time that fear would eventually go away in it's own." He says this as Edna goes to the kitchen for some milk.

Then Ed looks outside and sees a trailer from out of nowhere and a sign on it reads "FREE TRAILER". Ed smiles in delight and shouts, "FREE TRAILER!" Then Eddy, Double D, Nazz, and May then can't believe their eyes and go for the "Free Trailer" offer. They all go inside the trailer but then they hear sinister laughter and the trailer is bolted shut on the outside.

Double D then says, "I must be a fool to fall for the "free trailer" offer." Nazz then replies, "We all are, if this was a trap then....OH NO.... COUSIN EDNA!!!"

Meanwhile, Edna comes out of the kitchen, drinking a glass of milk. She looks around and yells out, "Hello! Cousin Nazz? May? Eds?" Then she hears the sound of squeaking shoes and the squeaking got louder. As Edna sits down, a pair of gloved hands grabs her shoulders and yells out, "GUESS WHO!"

Edna gets up and to her horror... IT'S MARIE KANKER IN A CLOWN SUIT!" Edna walked back, and bumps into Lee Kanker in a clown suit and she grabs her. Lee then says to her, "Our "Silent Partner" told us this is the one thing you fear and now we're getting our revenge for taking May from us, protecting the Eds from us, and doing stuff to our trailer at the end of every chapter!" Edna sweatdrops and shivers in fear as the worst is yet to come.

Kevin shows up with a baseball bat and says to Edna, "You were the dork (don't laugh) that made Nazz see me what I was like and so I like lost her... YOU WILL PAY FOR THIS!" As Kevin swings his bat, Edna ducks and Lee is pounded by the bat instead while Edna escapes.

Edna runs around the house screaming "THE CLOWNIES CAME AND TOOK AWAY MY NAKAMA!" Marie pops out of nowhere and shouts, "I'm a clown....laugh! AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! Edna then slides under her legs and runs to the bathroom and locks herself.

Kevin then shouts, "Come out of there you dork! You got to get out of there eventally... Ok Lee I did my part now you two get your sister. Marie then says, "You're awesome Kevin... on and sorry for the whole destroy your roof thing, we were going to use it to destroy Edna's house...we swear!" Kevin then says as he tries to hold in his anger, "I believe you, besides I'm glad there's someone else here who has a grudge against her too! She kept protecting the Eds and kept saying I have a bald spot the size of my butt under my hat. Lee then takes off his hat and says, "Whoa, Edna was right!" Kevin then says, "Knock it off and go get your sister, I'll pound that do...I mean Edna when she gets out of there.

As Kevin continues to rant and wait for Edna to leave the bathroom, her inner self enters a world in her dreams called "Spring Valley" and she sees what appears to be a "purple flying jester" flying in the sky and "her inner magical girl" (what are you expecting...a inner fratboy?") her inner magical girl is really Kaoru Matsubara/ Powered Buttercup from "Powerpuff Girls Z".

Buttercup says to her "Hi... I'm your inner magical girl" Edna says "Wow! I didn't know I had one...you're so cool! Buttercup then says "Well every girl has one, I heard you have problems with clowns and your friends aren't doing a thing about it... well do I have help for you! Anyway clowns aren't scary... except from that one from "IT" and John Wayne Gacy. Oh no...they're really different from us... and even though they look different, doesn't mean you're afraid of them." Edna then says "Actually the real reason why I'm afraid of clowns is because (whispers it in Buttercup's ears)" Buttercup replies "OH WOW! That's messed up! But those aren't real clowns! Well anyway it means you should be angry at them for being different.. now go and save your friends... that reminds me, they should be "anime-ized" too like me and the other Powerpuff Girls..."

Edna then wakes up and then she pulls out a the ultimate weapon... a board with a nail on it. She opens the door says in a demented way as she twitches her left eye just to creep out Kevin, "Oh look! funny clown..."

Meanwhile, Marie and Lee open the "free trailer" and successfully grab May. The others just laugh at their costumes but then Double D then says, "Oh no... I know why you're wearing that! What did you do to Edna?" Lee then says, "Nothing... that's Kevin's job AHAHAHA!"

But then the two see Edna chasing a bruised up Kevin with a board and nail on it, Edna then shouts while imitating Happy Gilmore, "YOU'RE GONNA DIE CLOWN!"

Lee and Marie's eyes perk up and Lee then says, "Just grab May and go, RUN!" They just do that while Kevin hides in the bushes. Edna goes after the two and when Edna caught up with them Lee then says, "Before you clobber us there is one thing we got to say... Kevin put us up to it!" Lee and Marie just drop May and run up a tree and hide up there.

May opens the trailer and lets Nazz and the Eds out. Eddy then sees the two Kankers up the tree and yells at them, "AHAHAHAHA! SERVES YOU RIGHT! Eddy was about to throw a rock at the two but Edna grabs the rock and says, "No... they had enough already, let's go home.

**(Edna's house)**

The Simpsons comes on and it was the episode "Krusty gets Cancelled" Edna watches it and finds it funny... but everyone else is shocked. May then says, "Umm Edna... are you still afraid of clowns?" Edna then says, "Well they still freak me out but my inner magical girl tells me I shouldn't be afraid of them." Nazz then asks, "Then why are you ok with watching the Simpsons with Krusty?" Edna then says, "It's cuz Krusty's funny, he's a Simpsons character... everyone likes the Simpsons! Even Ed does!"

Ed accidentally drops his bowl of gravy on the floor and says, "D'OH!"

**NEXT TIME: Edna and May meet a new friend... and the gang has to stop Ed and Eddy from their next scam... Eddy performs extremely stupid stunts for that show on MTV and tries to submit the video to MTV, can they save him before he gets critically injured? find out next time!**


	9. Eddy on MTV'S Jackbutt

**Ed, Edd, Eddy, n Edna**

By Technomaru

Chapter 9: Eddy's making a JACKASS out of himself!

Note: I do not own "Jackass" and Ed, Edd, n Eddy...but "The Fourth Ed" is mine! But Racheal belongs to someone else!

This is a spin-off of "The Grim ED-ventures of Ed, Edd, n Eddy". I always wondered what if Edna existed in the "Ed, Edd, n Eddy" canon and...THIS STORY DOES NOT CONTAIN SUPERNATURAL ELEMENTS!

IMPORTANT NOTE: This chapter introduces a OC that belongs to Squeaken1 named Rachel... THANK YOU!

"**The following fanfic features stunts performed either by professional idiots or under the supervision of professional idiots. Accordingly, Technomaru and this site must insist that no one attempts to recreate or re-enact any stunt or activity performed on this fanfic"**

**In loving memory of**

**Sandra Cantu**

**2001-2009**

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A day after the "clown incident", Edna and May are left with a "free trailer" the Kankers and Kevin used as bait for the others. May asks Edna, "Umm what are we going to do with that trailer?" Edna replies, "I have no idea but my dad's friend who happens to be a police officer told him that if no one returns to claim for the trailer, then it might as well be ours, I bet it would look good with my older sister's pickup truck.

Then they noticed someone looking at the "free trailer", it was a girl who appears to be the same age as the four Eds. She wears glasses similar to Edna's but red, has short blue hair in a style similar to Nazz's. She wears a black shirt and a plaid skirt, and appears to be a bit shorter than Edna and May.

Edna asks her, "Umm may we help you?" The girl appears to be shocked and says to Edna, "Hey wait... you can see me? You mean you guys can really see me?" Edna replies, "Well you're not invisible and definatly not a ghost because we don't allow them in this fanfic! "Grim-Eds" yes but definately not here!" May then asks the girl, "Why are you talking like that?"

The girl frowns a bit and says, "I feel invisible already, no body notices me here, not even on the day I moved from Lemon Brook, I try to make friends but what's the point, everyone ignores me." Edna and May look at eachother and Edna then tells her, "You know... you can hang out with us anytime you want, oh my name is Edna Esmeralda Espinosa and this is my BFF 4 life May Kanker. The girl seems nervous but Edna asks for her name and she replies, "My name is Rachel Carlyle, and... I guess I'm glad to meet you all."

Edna says to Rachel, "You look kinda like me." And Rachel responds, "Well you look like "Ugly Betty"... and not in a bad way." Edna replies, "I get that alot, oh and is the trailer yours?" Rachel replies, "Nope, I was just interested in it." May then says to Edna, "Since the "free trailer" is ours then what would we do with it?" Edna replies, "Well we can make it our clubhouse until big sister decides she can use it, I wonder how the Kankers got it.

Before it continues, The three see a stressed out Double D who shouts at Edna, "EDNA! WE GOT TO STOP THEM!" Edna looks confused and Double D shouts out, "WE GOT TO STOP EDDY'S SCAM!" May then says, "Nuh uh! If I ruin his scam, he will be prejudiced towards me again for being a Kanker." Double D then says, "No May, he is doing insane cockamamie stunts while Ed tapes it, he says he's going to send the videotape to MTV networks for this show called "Jackbutt".

May's eyes perk up and says, "Oh no... EDDY'S TRYING OUT FOR "MTV'S JACKASS"! Edna then asks May, "You watch "MTV's Jackass"?" May then says, "That show was funny... like the time Steve-O..." Double D then says, "May sorry to say but I don't think I should hear about what those guys do, it's just wrong!" Edna asks, "Is cousin Nazz going to help us get that potential Jackass out of trying on that show?" Double D then says, "I just came from there, it turns out she picked up a sever case of hay fever so it's up to me, you, May...Who are you?" Double D notices Rachel.

Edna then says, "This is Rachel.... she moved from Lemon Brook, she would like to make some friends." Rachel then says, "Much as I don't know you guys much, I think I should help you stop your friend from making a jackass out of himself on "MTV's Jackass"

And with that the four run to wherever Eddy's at.

**(In another part of town)**

Eddy looks at the camera and says, "This is Eddy and I'm giving this cat a tasty treat!" As Ed films this, Eddy picks up a cat, lifts up his shirt and the cat proceeds to bite his nipple and he starts running around screaming and then manages to get rid of the cat while Ed is laughing at this.

Then Eddy sees Sarah and Jimmy playing dolls and Sarah then yells at Eddy, "Get out of here, we're not in the mood for your scamming you stupid head!" Eddy replies, "Actually I'm not going to scam, I'm going to PARTY!" And with that Eddy takes off his clothes, revealing himself wearing nothing but a speedo and starts dancing as Ed plays techno music on a boombox. Sarah find this disurbing while Jimmy was watching him and Sarah grabs him and leaves.

Ed sneaks behind Johnny 2x4 and pulls out a electric razor and as "Psycho" music plays in the background, Ed quicky shaves Johnny on the back and he says, "Hey Ed that feels good, too bad I don't have hair to be shaved off, Plank want you to have a quarter!" Johnny then gives Ed a quarter and Ed then says, "Thank you Plank!"

Eddy sees Edna, Double D, May, and Rachel going for him and Eddy then says, "Oh no, they're going to ruin this scam, quick Ed, to your house!" And with that, Ed puts Eddy in a shopping cart and he jumps in as well. Eddy then steers the shopping cart while Ed videotapes it.

**(Ed's house)**

Ed hears noises in the Kitchen and he finds a hole on the wall, he looks into it and asks, "Any mice in there? Then a bunch of multi-colored tiny creatures then shout in unison, "NOBODY HERE BUT US FRAGGLES YOU SILLY CREATURE!" Then they start to sing...

"Dance your cares away,  
Worry's for another day.  
Let the music play,  
Down at Fraggle Ro..."

Ed then says, "Bye bye Smurfs!" Eddy then says, "Smurfs? Where? (looks at hole) Oh those are just Fraggles, they're worthless! Then one of them tosses a radish at Eddy, knocking him out.

Eddy wakes up 5 minutes later and does another stunt, Eddy says to Ed's Camera, "This is Eddy and I'm going to jump for joy!" Eddy jumps into a trampoline and he hits a fan and falls into the floor in pain. After that he goes "Ahh!! _(sszzzes) _Ahh!! _(sszzzes) _Ahh!! _(sszzzes) _Ahh!! _(sszzzes) _Ahh!! _(sszzzes) _Ahh!! _(sszzzes) _Ahh!! _(sszzzes) _Ahh!! _(sszzzes) _Ahh!! _(sszzzes) _Ahh!! _(sszzzes)_"

**(Congrats to the Family Guy fans who got the joke!)**

Then suddenly, May, Rachel, Edna, and Double D open the door to Ed's house and Edna shouts, "THERE YOU ARE! Don't you know that MTV doesn...."

Eddy then shows up in a clown costume while Ed tapes the whole thing. Eddy then says, "I'm Eddy and I'm going to perform community service as a clown." Then Eddy runs around making demonic laughter and throws pies at Edna's faces and tells them that his name is "Pennywise". Edna falls into a fetal position and goes "Can't sleep, clowns will eat me, Can't sleep, clowns will eat me..."

Double D then says, "I know you're trying to look very unintelligent for that lowbrow show but it gives you no right to..." Eddy then hits Double D with a sock and says "I don't think so, Eddy don't play that!" Rachel thinks to herself, "He's cute... I'd date him if he wasn't that stupid".

Eddy looks at May and then says, "I GOT IT! C'mon Lumpy we're going to the trailer park!" Eddy throws a smoke bomb to the ground and as the smoke clears up they just see Ed and Eddy exit the front door.

**(Park n Flush Trailer Park)**

Eddy says to Ed on his camera, "This is Eddy and I'm going to make the Kankers beat the snot out of me!"

He shouts at the top of his lungs,

**(PLEASE, DO NOT ATTEMPT!)**

"TRAILER TRASH!"

Then Lee and Marie show up and says, "Oh you are just asking for it! After I beat you up I will kiss your booboos better."

Eddy then says as he makes a huge grin, "Hey Kankers... want to know the difference between me and you... AT LEAST I KNOW WHO MY DAD IS!" Eddy braced himself for the beating and then to his suprise... Lee and Marie burst into tears and they wailed as they ran to their trailer.

Eddy then looks distraught as the stunt didn't work and he says to Ed, "Ok Ed shut off the tape, we got enough footage anyway! But at least I made the Kankers cry!" Hey wait I got another idea and be better do it fast, I see Edna's group coming after us!"

**(Kevin's garage)**

Eddy sneaks out of there giggling and then Kevin goes inside his garage to ride his bike but then the minute he starts it up, he discovers the wheels on his bike are decorated with firecrackers and then the firecrackers set off, blowing up and a "piccolo pete" flies up and lands on Kevin's hat, burning it to a crisp. Jimmy sees this and says, "Wow, Edna's right, you do have a bald spot the size of your bu..." Kevin replies, "Not a word "Fluffy"!"

Ed and Eddy then laugh and Eddy says to Ed, This is perfect, now to send it in and soon we'll be on MTV!"

**(2 Weeks later, also Edna's friends are properly introduced to Rachel...except for Eddy whom is very occupied with his latest scam)**

Eddy is very very very disappointed...

Ed, Double D, Edna, May, Nazz and Rachel show up at Eddy's house to see if his "scam" worked. Rachel stands infront of him and says to him, "Hi, I'm Rachel!" Eddy then ignores her and as Edna asks, "So.... what did you learn?" Eddy then blurts out, "I just discovered MTV does NOT accept videos from Jackass fans in hopes of discouraging fans from making total jackasses out of themselves, and I think we said "Jackass" way to much in this chapter... good thing this fanfic has a "T" rating.

Edna then notices a dejected Rachel and then Edna clobbers Eddy with a pillow, "That was for putting yourself in danger for no apparent reason!", she clobbers him again, "And that is for ignoring our new friend Rachel for two weeks!!" Eddy then says, "Ummm... hello... my name is Eddy." Rachel just giggles and hugs him.

Then everyone hears a knock at Eddy's door, It was Lee Kanker, Marie Kanker, and Kevin. Lee then says, "Relax Edna, we're here for Eddy, we found out what he was doing two weeks ago!" Marie finds him and grabs him and goes. The others just watch Eddy get pummeled by Kevin, Lee, and Marie Kanker because of all the things they did to them during his "MTV Jackass scam"

Eddy then gets pummeled and she shouts at Edna, "HELP ME!" Edna then yells out, "IF I HELP YOU, THEN YOU WON'T LEARN!" Nazz then says to Edna, "You know you have a good point, if Eddy keeps doing dumb things then stuff like this will happen to him." Ed replies, "Not even I'm that dumb Edna!" May then says to Ed, "But Ed you were the one with the camera!" Rachel then says, "Umm I'm just going to help him when he's had enough...."

After all that was over, Kevin just goes home and the two Kankers just leave, then Lee realizes that they could easily have revenge on Edna but since they were at the trailer they decide to call it a day.

**(10 pm, at the Kanker trailer)**

Marie and Lee are in the trailer planning revenge on Edna and trying to claim May back as well as their "boyfriends" but then they hear something outside their trailer. The two sneak out of the trailer all stealth-like, but then Marie pounces on the intruder, only to be knocked into the trailer wall. The two see three mysterious girls in the shadows and they appear to be smoking, and making evil laughs.

Lee then says, "Edna I know that's you and May and the weird girl who has been coming here and vandalizing our trailer, come on out!"

One of the girls then says, "We would be more intimidating if you don't know what we look like hee hee hee ha ha ha!" the other girl says, "We are not who you think we are, we are actually from the neighboring town of Lemon Brook and we were declared the most despicable group of girls to rock the neighborhood but then you three came along and threaten the title. The third girl grabs Lee and shouts, "AND WE DON'T LIKE COMPETITION! NO ONE'S BADDER THAN US!! EVER!"

Lee backs off and she says, "Hey Marie, they have the guts to tell us they are worse than us, I say we fight them off!" Marie then says, "Oh boy, a rumble! I'm so going to enjoy pummeling you three with my bare fists!" Then the girls leave the shadows and reveal themselves to be three blonde haired 11 year olds with cigarettes in their mouths (DON'T TRY THIS AT HOME!) and they carry boards with nails on it. The leader of the girls then says, "Before we pound you into a coma let me introduce ourselves, you can call us...THE KILLER SISTERS! MUAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

In 15 seconds flat, the Killer Sisters have totally brutally pounded Lee and Marie Kanker. The leader then says, "If you want to live then do us a favor... give up your title for most notorious group of girls in the area and if you two try to upstage us once again then you will know more than what a "hertz' donut" is! As the Killers leave the trailer park, one of them kicks Marie on the side and the three just laugh about what they did.

**TO BE CONTINUED!**


	10. Enter the Killer Sisters!

**Ed, Edd, Eddy, n Edna**

By Technomaru

Chapter 10: Enter... THE KILLER SISTERS!!

Note: I do not Ed, Edd, n Eddy...but "The Fourth Ed" is mine! And Rachel belongs to Squeaken1!

This is a spin-off of "The Grim ED-ventures of Ed, Edd, n Eddy". I always wondered what if Edna existed in the "Ed, Edd, n Eddy" canon and...THIS STORY DOES NOT CONTAIN SUPERNATURAL ELEMENTS!

It started as a thought, "What if there was ANOTHER group of bad girls who just happen to be even worse than the Kankers... and well this is the result! Also I decide to have Rachel have a past with them.

IMPORTANT NOTE: This chapter fully introduces the Killer Sisters and it is the first part of a three part trilogy!

**Happy Easter Fans!**

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Double D wakes up and hears a strange sound coming out from the door. He opens the door and to his horror, he sees Lee and Marie Kanker covered in bruises and tissues up their noses. They apparently crawled to Double D's house. Lee looks at Double D with both uncovered eyes and she says in a slurred voiced, "H....hel....p usss!"

Double D, remembering all the things those two did in the previous 9 chapters, decided to put aside their differences and wearing gloves he tries as hard as he can to take them to the guest room and places them on the beds as he treats their wounds.

**(2 hours later)**

Rachel shows up at Double D's house. She finds him making lemonade and she asks, "Hi Double D what's up?" Double D then responds, "Sorry Rachel but something just came up!" Rachel follows Double D and to her horror she sees Lee and Marie Kanker in Double D's beds in the guestroom and Rachel says to him, "Oh my gosh... I know those two, they were the ones who beat up Eddy when he hurt their feelings for that stupid stunt."

Double D replies, "They showed up like this and seeing how much they were in pain, I had no choice but to help them... they would do the same if I was pummeled to near death."

Rachel then has a idea in the form of a thought bubble where it has Lee and Marie "take care" of Double D like that psycho from "Stephen King's Misery"... right down to pulling out a sledgehammer. Rachel then says to Double D, "Not how I imagine it...but I doubt it." Double D then says, "You know this is very awkward so I suggest you don't tell an..." As Double D sees Ed, Eddy, Edna, Nazz, and May, he continues, "...yone about this!"

Edna then sees the two and says, "Oh my gosh... what happened! Eddy I know you hate Kankers but this is serious!" Eddy replies, "I didn't do this! I was working on my devil fruit scam... again!" May then says, "Well howcome my sisters got hurt but I didn't?" Rachel is shocked and says, "You're a Kanker... oh right that's your last name... but why aren't you like those two?" May replies, "Because my best friend Edna made me the most civilized pre-teen in the cul-de-sac... (Nazz looks angry) umm next to you Nazz!" Nazz then smiles and replies, "That's my Cousin! But Double D why are you helping those two after what they did to us in the last 9 chapters... they even accused us of vandalizing their trailer!"

Double D once again replies, "They showed up like this and seeing how much they were in pain, I had no choice but to help them... they would do the same if I was pummeled to near death."

Nazz then has a idea in the form of a thought bubble where it has Lee and Marie "take care" of Double D like that psycho from "Stephen King's Misery"... right down to pulling out a sledgehammer. Nazz then says to Double D, "Not how I imagine it...but I doubt it." Ed then says, "Deja vu!"

Eddy shows up with flyswatter and says, "Now that Lee's down it's time for REVENGE!" Edna, Nazz, Ed, Rachel and May try to hold off Eddy as Edna yells out, "Eddy no! Never hit someone while they're down! It's like shooting a man in the "family jewels" only lowlifes do that!" Rachel then remembers someone from her past who does such a thing.

Marie wakes up and sees everyone, she then says, "Mama always said there will be days like this..." Edna then says, 'Relax... Double D found you like this and he is trying to help you! So we might as well help you two as well!" Marie is suprised at this, she sees Rachel and says, "Umm Edna... do you have a sister?" Rachel replies, "Everyone thinks I look like her! Anyway this is serious... now tell me... who did this to you?"

Marie then responds, "Only if you answer my question... why are you helping us after all the things we did to you guys in the last 9 chapters?"

Double D then sighs heavily and says in a annoyed tone, "you showed up in my house like this and seeing how much you were in pain, I had no choice but to help you... you would do the same if I was pummeled to near death."

Marie then has a idea in the form of a thought bubble where it has herself and Lee "take care" of Double D like that psycho from "Stephen King's Misery"... right down to pulling out a sledgehammer. Marie then says to Double D, "Umm I think I better end this repenative joke by not saying that I had in mind." Eddy then asks, "Well why did you come to sockhead's house?"

Marie then answered, "Well out of the thr...I mean four Eds, I think Double D has the most heart and would care for a woman when she's down... also I apologize for thinking you guys were the ones who vandalized our trailer everyday." Edna replies, "But I have heart too... and I am a female too, why didn't you come to me?" Marie then replies, "Well you would retaliate against me and Lee for the way we treated May... oh and in case you're wondering... while we beat up and kiss the Ed-boys, we would tie you up and pelt you with vegetables... this is what we do to the Ed-girl."

Edna frowns and says, "And this is why I would normally retaliate for your misdeeds, but you're in pretty worse shape so I'll let you slide. Now that I answered your question then you must answer ours... WHO...DID...THIS...TO...YOU!"

Lee then slowly wakes up says to the group, "It was a group of girls they called themselves...the Killer Sisters!" Rachel screamed in fear and backed up to the wall upon hearing that name. Then everyone is shocked. While everyone helps out Rachel, Double D and Edna make Lee and Marie some tomato soup. Lee then says, "You know Edna... you're alright... you too Double D!" Double D then says, "Anything to help others, now tell me more about those three who did this to you?" Lee replies, "Those three think we hold the title of "the baddest group of girls in the county" and we do! But they want that title from us and to show that they aren't joking, they knocked off one of my teeth!"

Nazz then says to Lee Kanker, "So pretty much, the "Killer Sisters" make Baroque Works look like the Veggie Pirates... I mean Usopp Pirates ...not that I read "One Piece" of course!" Edna then goes up to Nazz and says to her, "Cousin Nazz... Rachel has calmed down and he says something to say..."

Rachel then tells everyone, "Yes it is true... I do have a past with them back in my hometown of Lemon Brook...

**(Flashback begins as Rachel narrarates it)**

Ok, a few months ago before moving to Peach Creek, I lived in a somewhat dystopian town known as "Lemon Brook". As usual I was ignored by most of my peers... except for three girls who were notoriously titled, "The most baddest girls in the county", Julie Killer, Lindsay Killer, and Tara Killer... THE KILLER SISTERS!"

They shoplift, they smoke, they cuss, they beat up anyone who looks at them at the wrong way...AND THEY ARE ONLY A YEAR YOUNGER THAN ME!!!

**(Reminder to readers... the majority of the main characters are apparently aged 12, Johnny, Sarah and Jimmy are exceptions... and according to Rachel, the Killer Sisters are 11)**

They actually notice me... and made me their "gofer"! They made me get them "king ground" brand cigarettes, issues of "Playgal" and "Naughty girl magazine", count cards for them, and get out the cement for when they have to make shoes for their victims!"

**(Everyone shudders from the thought... even Marie and Lee)**

Nazz asks, "Why doesn't anyone do anything about their activities? They're more like criminals than Junior High students!" Rachel then adds, "Their Mother is mayor of the town and their father was chief of the police, they can do whatever they want!" Anyway I found salvation when my parents told me we would move away from Peach Creek... and away from them. So I quietly left Lemon Brook without them noticing I was gone... by leaving behind a scarecrow dressed like me! They can't tell the difference! But now I fear they know where I'm at and they would abduct me and bring me back to Lemon Brook!"

Lee and Marie look at eachother and Lee then says, "Hey that kinda sounds alot like what we used to make May do... but this is just extreme!" May then says, "I know how you feel Rachel... when they do show up we'll protect ya... umm Eddy what are you doing?"

Eddy is trying to leave the house through the window as he says, "Fat chance! I'm not going to stick around for the Killers t...hey Rachel... what are you doing?" Rachel makes really huge cute eyes at him and they fire sparkle beams into Eddy's eyes." Eddy is paralyzed and says, "Oh no... NOOOoooooo ok I'll protect you too!" Eddy then uncontrollably hugs Rachel. Rachel replies, "You're cute... I feels nice to be liked!" She giggles as she hugs him back.

Then Someone knocks at the door and then Edna and her friends hear a voice through the door that says, "Umm we're the local pest exterminators... we're here to exterminate a certain type of pest... KANKERS! WE KNOW YOU'RE HERE! WE'RE GOING TO BUST THROUGH THIS DOOR AND FINISH THE JOB HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!"

Edna's eyes perk up and she asks Double D, "Double D... do you have a secret base in your house?" Double D replies, "Actually there is one but I use it to hide from the Kankers but they'e here an..." Edna then says, "Now's not the time! Those girls are worse than the Kankers, get them into the base with us!"

As Ed, Edd, Eddy, Edna, Nazz, May, Lee, Marie, and Rachel go into hiding, Ed then says to Edna, "No! Let me stay behind... I'll deal with them... I have the brain of cottage cheese!" Edna then says, "That might be a dumb move... but I respect your bravery... it makes me glad to be a Ed... now while you deal with who're behind the door, we'll analyze their behavior... good luck!"

As they hide, Ed is left standing. The door bursts open and he sees a rather angry Kevin who says, "Ok you do...I mean Ed, where is Edna? I still have a score to settle with her for exposing to everyone the reason why I have a thing for the word "dork"!" Edna then says, "Oh geez it's that dork Kevin!" May replies, "Umm where are the Killers?"

Kevin then says, "Since you're here I might as well take the anger out at you!" Kevin tries to land a punch at Ed but then... someone grabs his arm and then someone else grabs his legs. Then Kevin's abducters reveal themselves to be 11 year old girls with blonde hair and braces, they wear pink and black tubetops and one girl (Tara Killer) wears shorts, another (Lindsay Killer) wears pants, and their leader (Julie Killer) wears a skirt. They have pierced navels and they all smoke cigarettes.

Julie then says, "Hmmm fresh meat, straight for the huntin'!" Lindsay Killer then asks Ed, "Hey Lumpy we're looking for these girls (shows them a pic of the Kanker Sisters) now tell us where they are and maybe we won't hurt you... much!" Ed then replies, "Umm... gravy!" Julie then snaps and says, "DON'T PLAY DUMB WITH US! Now tell us... do you know those three?" Ed then says, "Umm... Kevin knows!" Kevin is shocked that Ed just said that!

Julie then pushes Ed down and then diverts her attention to Kevin and says, "You're cute... let's play a game, the game is called "Beat the crap out of the cutie" and the object is to survive our beating for 3 minutes, and if you survive... you can be my boyfriend!"

Kevin is sweating heavily and says, "Just put me out of my misery you dork!" Lindsay checks inside his pants and laughs heavily in a high pitched giggle...then the three pull out boards with nails on it and they drop Kevin and prepare for fun... "Killer style"

**(Cuts to the shocked reactions of Eddy, Double D, Edna, The Kanker Sisters, and Nazz, Rachel is shocked at this site and says, "This is bringing back memories!")**

After Julie burns her cigarette on Kevin's left hand, the three back away from Kevin and Julie says to him, "Oh good, he has a pulse... you're my new boyfriend now! Now tell me where those three girls are." Kevin cannot speak due to being barely concious. Lindsay then says, "Look Julie, the dumb one is still concious." Tara goes up to Ed and says to him, "If you want to live then do us a favor... spread the word to everyone that we will totally tear up Peach Creek unless those three surrender to us!"

Ed then says, "Umm you're the first mate!" Lindsay then says, "He's cute! After we destroy those three I get dibs on him!" Lindsay then says to her other sisters, "Ok let's make note of this... WE WILL DESTORY THIS PISS-ANT NEIGHBORHOOD UNTIL THE KANKERS SISTERS SURRENDER THEMSELVES TO US!" Let's start with that immigrant with the farm... I'm in the mood for some ham and eggs!"

The Killer Sisters make malicious laughter as they leave Double D's house...

Edna and the others were shocked to be finding out about this and they have no idea on how to deal with that!

**TO BE CONTINUED!**


	11. The Killer Sisters Strike!

**Ed, Edd, Eddy, n Edna**

By Technomaru

Chapter 11: THE KILLER SISTERS STRIKE!

Note: I do not Ed, Edd, n Eddy...but "The Fourth Ed" is mine! But Rachel belongs to someone else!

This is a spin-off of "The Grim ED-ventures of Ed, Edd, n Eddy". I always wondered what if Edna existed in the "Ed, Edd, n Eddy" canon and...THIS STORY DOES NOT CONTAIN SUPERNATURAL ELEMENTS!

It started as a thought, "What if there was ANOTHER group of bad girls who just happen to be even worse than the Kankers... and well this is the result! Also I decide to have Rachel have a past with them.

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After Edna and her friends leave Double D's house, they see Peach Creek in worser shape than the time The Kankers searched for their "ship inna bottle". The Killer Sisters really stuck to their threat about the destruction of Peach Creek unless the Kanker Sisters surrendered themselves to them.

Edna then says, "This like "I am Legend" but without the mutant vampire freaks." Eddy then says, "How about we just give Lee, May, and Marie to the Killers and they would leave us alone!" Lee then says, "If you weren't cute and I had my strength then I'd clobber you!" Edna then says, "No Lee, now's not the time to be a jerk to us, the Killers are going around town looking for you and your sisters... I'm not giving up without a fight!"

Marie was shocked and says to Edna, "You mean even though we did alot of mean things to you guys for the first 9 chapters, you refuse to give us up?' Edna replies, "That's right! Compared to those three you two are human... but May is my bff and if you don't like it then tough s..."

Double D then yells out, "EDNA! LANGUAGE!" Edna sheepishly then replies, "I was gonna say "tough stuffing"... as in what you put in a turkey!" Double D then replies, "Well that's ok then... I guess... anyway following Edna's lead I say we have no choice but to... team up with Lee and Marie if it means getting the Killers out of Peach Creek... mostly because it takes a tough girl group to beat one."

Lee gets angry and tells Double D, "Forget it! Your sockhat must be on too tight! I'd never surrender to you Eds, especially Edna!" Marie was about to pound some sense into Lee until Edna pushes her aside and tells Marie, "Violence won't be nessessary, let me convince her." And with that, Edna asks to Rachel, "Can I borrow you for a bit?" May lifts up Lee's bangs while Edna then holds Rachel like a gun and fires her "cute sparkle eyes" at Lee.

Lee then struggles to shake it off while ranting, "Oh no... this girl is emitting something from her cute eyes that make anyone who see it powerless...NOOOOooooo ok I'll team up... so what's the plan leader girl?"

Eddy looks at Edna and yells out, "Leader! Who made you leader? I'm the leader here!" Edna then says, "In case you haven't kept score, I'm the one Ed with the most common sense here!" Eddy then replies, ".... Touche' Edna!"

Edna then says to her friends... and Lee and Marie, "Ok, those three will terrorize anything and anyone until they find the Kanker Sisters, but I will not let that happen... even though May's sisters deserve it. Ed, Eddy, hide Lee, Marie, and Rachel since they are the Killer Sister's targets and for heaven's sake Eddy do not surrender them to the Killers, Nazz go with them to make sure Eddy doesn't do that! Double D, May, I want you to come with me to analyze the Killer Sisters' behaviour and see if they have any potential weaknesses.

And with that they execute the plan. Edna, May and Double D hide in the bushes and to their horror, they see Lindsay and Tara Killer with Sarah and Jimmy in their hands, bashing their heads repeatingly as Lindsay says, "Well look at that... they're fighting, now they're kissing, they're fighting, now they're kissing, they're fighting, now they're kissing, HA HA HA! This is fun!"

Sarah then yells out, "I'M TELLIN' MOM!" Lindsay then makes a high pitched giggle and says to Sarah, "Hey check it out Tara, this girl has frog lips, let's make her eat a fly! HAHAHA!" Tara catches a fly and Lindsay forces Sarah to open her mouth, but before anything can happen Jimmy slips away unnoticed. Lindsay then says to Tara, forget that sissy, it'll be funnier if we make "frogmouth" here eat this fly, HAHAHA!"

Before anything can happen, something fires a rock at Lindsay's back and she howled in pain as Sarah makes her get away. Edna turns around and sees Rachel with a slingshot. Edna says to her, "Rachel! What are you doing here? I thought you were with the Kankers?" Rachel then replies, "Those three did a whole lot to me and I cannot stand the idea of anyone going through the same exact thing I did!" May then says to Edna, "Hey Edna, looks like you're passing on your courage to her! Now Rachel go back to the others before they...spot...you?"

Rachel apparently runs off and to Edna, Double D, and May's horror, they see that Rachel has ran up to the Killers and fired another rock at Tara. The two howled in pain but when Lindsay finds out who was doing it, she responds, "Tara, it's our "gofer"! So this is where you ended up at after all these months!" Tara notices her slingshot and replies, "So you're the sniper who attacked us, are you on stupid pills or something?"

Rachel replies, "The only thing I'm on is courage, my new friends helped me overcome my fears and when I find out what you're up to I decided to rise up and get back at you three, you might treat me like you did before but it gives you no right to treat others the same way and for what? You wanted that stupid title the Kankers have, well I want you to give up your ways and go back to Lemon Brook like the scurvy you are!"

Rachel fails to notice that Julie Killer is right behind her and is carrying a baseball bat. Julie then says, "Hello "gofer"! I hear you're rising up against us... now I'm giving you a chance for us to spare your life if you do one thing for us... tell us where the Kankers are!

Rachel asks, "Umm if you did find those three, what would you do to them?" Julie then pulls out a switchblade and says, "Oh not only me and my sisters will get their title and reputation... but as for them we will do stuff that would make this fanfic lose a "T" rating and cause more violence that Saw I, II, III, VI, V, and VI combined!" Then the three laugh sadistically.

Rachel then bites her lip and sweats profusely and says... "NO!"

Julie Killer then says as anime-like angry mark appears on her face , "Wrong answer! Perhaps me and my "droogs" will practice our "ultra-violence" on you!" Rachel then sees the three dashing towards her but then she is grabbed by a certain "superhero" wearing a watermelon for a mask. IT'S CAPTAIN MELONHEAD AND SPLINTER THE WOODEN WONDER! So Captain Melonhead, Rachel and Splinter swing to another part of the park and ends up being chased by the Killer Sisters.

They end up in a dead end and Captain Melonhead has no choice to pull out a radio and try to use it as a weapon but the radio turned out to have some power in it as he turns it on and as he holds it above his head, the radio was playing "In your eyes" by Peter Gabriel.

The Killer Sisters acted like they were sick and then Lindsay then says, "That song... it's messing up with my equilibrium!" Then Tara says, "It's messing with all our equilibriums..." Julie then yells out, "LET'S GET OUT OF HERE!" Then the Killer Sisters run off but then they bump into Eddy and then the three see Lee and Marie and Julie then shouts, "OUR PREY! GET THEM!" Then Eddy takes off the headphones from his portable boombox and the song plays, "Play that funky music" by Wild Cherry. The Killer Sisters howl in pain as Lindsay Killer yells out, "THAT MUSIC! IT HURTS! Julie then says, "FORGET THE KANKERS, WE MUST FLEE!" Then the Killer Sisters run off to parts unknown in the town.

Eddy looks at his boombox and he says to the others, "It must be the music... but why did it drive them insane?" Ed nonchalantly replies, "INSANE IN THE MEMBRANE!"

Rachel then says, "I almost forgot to tell you... The Killer Sisters have a extreme hatred of music that came from the 70's and 80's, this is mostly caused by the fact that they grew up watching MTV that only showed programs about "Stupid rich spoiler girls" and since MTV never shows music videos anymore the three have no idea what real music was like back then... that and who ever heard of those types listening to oldies radio stations?" Everyone agrees with what Rachel says.

Edna looks at Eddy and she tells him, "Well Eddy, looks like we're going to put our rivalry in the past, we can use BOTH our older siblings' music to get those three out of Peach Creek and make sure they never cause anymore damage again nor hurt anyone.

Eddy then smirks and says, "Good idea Edna, now let's perform one "concert" those three will never forget!"

Nazz then says to Edna, "By the way cousin Edna, My parents named me from a band from the 60's!" Ed, Edd, Eddy, Edna, May, Lee, Marie, Captain Melonhead, and Rachel just look at her weird.

**TO BE CONCLUDED!**


	12. Plan to Defeat the Killer Sisters!

**Ed, Edd, Eddy, n Edna**

By Technomaru

Chapter 12: Eddy and Edna's Funky Science! Plan to defeat the Killer Sisters!

Note: I do not Ed, Edd, n Eddy...but "The Fourth Ed" is mine! But Rachel belongs to someone else!

This is a spin-off of "The Grim ED-ventures of Ed, Edd, n Eddy". I always wondered what if Edna existed in the "Ed, Edd, n Eddy" canon and...THIS STORY DOES NOT CONTAIN SUPERNATURAL ELEMENTS!

This chapter contains parodies and snippits of 70's and 80's music and I hope I don't get into trouble despite using them in a humorous way... I just hope u guys get the jokes!

Also as for the title, "Funky" is a common word in the 70's and "Science" is a common word in the 80's!

**I would also like to congraduate cousin Julie Rogge and Joey De La Luz for their happy marriage!**

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Edna plans a way to use 70's and 80's music to scare away the Killer Sisters for good. Eddy then says to Edna, "Well I guess my old vinyl records will actually save the day, I'm going to my house and I'm taking Ed and Double D with me. Edna then says to Eddy, "Ok, and I'll get my 80's records and CDs, I hope the Killers like Duran Duran, I'd like to introduce her to a girl named "Rio".... and she likes to dance in the sand! Good luck my nakama!"

Meanwhile, Rachel giggles as she sees "Captain Melonhead" climb up a tree. Rachel blushes and says, "Thank you... umm... just who are you and are you a member of the Justice Friends?" Captain Melonhead then says to her in a enigmatic voice, ""Who am I? You sure you want to know? The story of my life is not for the faint of heart. If somebody said it was a happy little tale... if somebody told you I was just your average ordinary guy, not a care in the world... somebody lied."

Rachel then says, "Umm can you fast forward that bit, I like the idea you're doing a very blatuant rip-off of the movie about that "spider-guy"

Captain Melonhead continues, ""Whatever life holds in store for me, I will never forget these words: "With great power comes great responsibility." This is my gift, my curse. Who am I? I'm Captain Melonhead!"

After that, it starts to rain and Captain Melonhead is hanging upside down from the tree and only for Rachel to giggle and as she blushes, she kisses him. Captain Melonhead's watermelon mask falls off and then Rachel is confused, Edna sees this and says to Rachel, "How cute! Johnny 2x4 is playing superhero and seems to like you!" Johnny then falls off from the tree and says, "Oh no! My secret identity is revealed" Rachel then puts her finger on Johnny's lips and she says, "I don't care if they returned to haunt me and the Kankers, I think I met... "the one"!" Johnny pulls out Plank and says, "I like you too Rachel!'

The two giggle together and Lee Kanker shouts, "KNOCK IT OFF! If I wanted to get sick off of sugary sweets, I'd put brown sugar on my ham!" Marie then says, "Oh c'mon Lee, I'm getting some ideas with my stud muffin when he gets back (Edna looks at her with a "oh no you don't" look) Maybe not!"

**(Speaking of Marie's "stud muffin")**

Ed, Edd, n Eddy are running to Eddy's house and they manage to get the music, but as they are able to make it home free, they bump into... THE KILLER SISTERS!

Tara sees Double D and says, "Hey I know those three, those are the guys the Kankers call "their boyfriends" Well they're going to be our boyfriends (blows smoke into Double D's face) Whether they like it or not!" Lindsay then glomps Ed and says, "Hoo boy! Me and you are gonna have some fun tonight!" Julie is tugging on Eddy's pants and says, "This is great, tonight we eliminate the Kankers, steal their title... and they're boyfriends! Ok girls, let's remove their trowsers!"

The three Eds find themselves pantsless as the Killer Sisters move in on them.

**(Back to Edna's meeting point)**

Edna then puts the CDs in her special boombox and she says, "Ok Lee, once me and Eddy's music drains the fight out of them, you, May, and Marie will finish them off and send them packing to Lemon Brook with a guarantee that they will never terrorize Rachel, you guys, and us ever again!"

Lee then says, "Yeah yeah whatever! I'm only doing this so we can stop getting our butts handed to us by those three.

The three male Eds run to Edna and then she is shocked and asks them "Where are your pants?" Double D replies, "I...don't want to talk about it!"

**(Before I get all kind of angry reviews from fans and parents I have to tell you all that the Killer Sisters did NOT do what you all think they did to Ed, Edd, n Eddy. They just simply stole their pants and the three Eds just run away before they tried anything. thank you for understanding!)**

Lee and Marie grit their teeth and Marie then says, "THOSE MONSTERS! They even tried to violate Double D... before I could!" Lee looks at May and asks her, "Why haven't you crushed on Ed lately?" May then says, "Well I prefer to be friends with "Big Ed" and not a violent abusive love interest such as yourself... and yes hanging out with Edna made me a tad bit smarter!

Edna then says, "May, I hope you and your sisters don't mind being bait but we need what it takes to get them here long enough for our trap to work... oh and did you bring the "Canadian squirt guns" filled with your special glue? Because that's good enough to trap them where we want them. Ed then says, "CANADIANS ARE WEIRD!"

Lee asks, "Are you sure this will work?" Edna replies, "If Rachel was right about them hating that sort of music then it's bound to work... I'll let you beat them up!" Double D replies as he prepares the equiptment, "As much as I dislike violence... they had it coming!" Rachel then says, "Yeah they do... I just hope this works!"

**(10 minutes later)**

The Killer Sisters are at Rolf's house, they drink his cows' milk as Julie says to her sisters in a british accent, "Ah! Nothing like a glass of "Moloko" to sharpen you up for the bit of the old "ultraviolence" oh me sisters?" Julie then says, "Ha ha ha! Good one imitating that one guy from that one movie about the gang... umm what was it called again? "My clock is orange"?"

Lindsay and Tara just throw eggs at Rolf as he is hung by his legs on a noose as the three laugh maniacally." Rolf then mutters to himself, "The son of a shepard cannot beat those three for they be the darkness itself... hello goodbye?"

Then a rock is thrown through the window and it hits Tara, Julie turns around and sees it was Marie Kanker that did it. Tara then recovers and tell the the other two, "Oh it's on... it's on like Donkey Kong!"

The Killer Sisters get to the center of the neighborhood and see the Kanker Sisters, the two groups just stared at eachother... Then Julie pulls out a switchblade but then the Kankers pulled out "canadian squirt guns" and fired at their feet and legs with their special glue. Julie then looks at Lee and says, "You are so dead once I get out of here!"

But suddenly... to the Killer's suprise, they see what appears to be a 80's themed band. They see Edna as vocals, Rachel on synthesizer, Nazz with a guitar, and May runs to Edna and pulls out a guitar. To their horror Edna sings "We Built this City" by Starship as her band plays.

"We built this city... we built this city on rock and roll!  
Built this city... we built this city on rock and roll!"

As their heads start to hurt, the Killers turn around and see Ed, Edd, n Eddy in their own band and Eddy then sings,

"Do a little dance, make a little love, get down tonight!"

Then the Killers look back at Edna's band and they sing,

"Hit me with your best shot!  
Why dont you hit me with your best shot!  
Hit me with your best shot!  
Fire away!"

Julie then says, "When I get out of here, that's what I'm going to do! I'll give you a shot! I'm going to fire away!" But then she sees the male Eds dancing and singing "Staying Alive" Then they turn around and hear Edna's band perform a very obscure 80's song,

"...Make believe I'm everywhere, living in your eyes  
Written on the pages is the answer to our Neverending Story..."

The Killers are being driven crazy by being exposed to all those 70's and 80's songs. Then Edna says to Eddy, "Ok Eddy, now's the time we combined my songs with your singing talent!" Eddy replies, "You got it Edna!"

And with that, Eddy and Edna are about to perform a song and it involves Edna dressed like a kitten by wearing cat ears and tail and Edna and Eddy dancing together, that song is called "Opposites Attract" by Paula Abdul:

Edna: I take two steps forward

Eddy: I take two steps back

Both: We come together

Edna: Cuz I am dressed like a cat! And you know, it ain't fiction

Eddy: Just a natural fact

Both: We come together

Edna: Cuz I am dressed like a cat... meow!

Edna then says to Eddy, "Ok the Killers are lowering their defences, now perform operation "Internet Meme" as our finishing move!" Eddy goes up to the Killer Sisters and says to them, "Since you vultures took our pants now's the time for revenge... I'm here to tell you that you... GOT RICK ROLLED!

Eddy starts singing "Never gonna give you up" with different lyrics with Edna, Rachel, Nazz, and May as backup

"We've know each other for so long  
Your hearts been aching  
and you're not too shy to say it  
Inside we both know whats been going on  
We know the game and were gonna play it

And I just want to tell you how Im feeling  
Got to make you understand,

Never gonna give you up  
Never gonna let you down  
Never gonna run around and desert you  
Never gonna make you cry  
Never gonna say goodbye  
Never gonna tell a lie and hurt you"

Ed then shouts, "I LIKE RICK ROLLING!"

The Killers Sisters then shiver with fear as the worst is yet to come... Edna then shouts, "Ok you Killers... now this is for a good measure!

Then Rachel, the Kanker Sisters, Ed, Edd, n Eddy, and Nazz are in zombie make-up While Edna turn around and appears to be a zombie in a red jacket! Ed holds a sign that reads "WE'RE NOT THE ED, EDD, N EDDY ZOMBIES!"

They surround the Killer Sisters, and then Edna appears to be... dancing! Edna and the "zombies" start dancing to a certain beat, their dance moves are impressive and Edna suddenly sings while the zombie horde dances...

"Cause this is Chiller, not "Thriller",

And no ones gonna save us from the music copyrights,

You know it's Chiller, Chiller night,

You're fighting for your life inside a killer, chiller...

Chiller, not "Thriller",

cause there are those who report the use of music like this,

Chiller, Chiller night,

So let us make a parody and share a Killer, diller, thriller,

Chiller here tonight!

("Zombie" Eddy grabs his crotch while dancing and "Zombie" Rachel conks his head with a club)

Cause this is Chiller, not 'Thriller",

cuz "Wacko Jacko" owns the real lyrics to this song,

Chiller, Chiller night,

Let's settle with a parody and share a Killer, Chiller, Oww!"

The Killer Sister then crouch down and cover their ears as Julie then says, "make it stop... PLEASE MAKE IT STOP!" Lindsay screams, "MERCY!" Edna then looks at them and says to them, "Did you girls give mercy when you did those horrible things to everyone... especially Rachel and the Kankers? I didn't think so... Ok Lee, I did my part now do yours!"

Then the Kanker Sisters then take off their make-up and proceed to beat them up and Rachel and Kevin on crutches join him too. Rachel sees Kevin and says, "Hey I know you! You're that shovelchinned jerk who calls everyone a "dork" because you have "dork envy"!" Kevin then says, 'I'm going to pretend I didn't hear that and continue to beat up those three!" Rachel replies, "I was their "gofer"!" Kevin then says, "Man, that's like heavy!" And the two proceed to beat the stuffing out of the three."

After the beating is over, Lee then says, "Serves them right! They're worser than us!" Marie then asks Edna, "Umm... What should we do with them? Edna then says to Rachel, "Hey Rachel I bet you have a idea! Rachel then makes the cutest smile possible after thinking of this idea...

Edna, Rachel, and the Kanker Sisters rolled up Julie Killer, Lindsay Killer, and Tara Killer up in a tatami mat and threw them in the creek that leads to the brook. As the three sail away, Edna then says, "Bye Killers! Be sure to say hi to my friend... "her name is Rio and she dances in the sand!" Lee then says, "Nice one Edna but you know now that they're gone we're going back to being the ones who antagonize you for protecting our "boyfriends", took May from us, and... well that's just about it!" Edna then says, "Good point, I mean Kevin can't be the only "jerk-ass" in this fanfic and yes I got that from the Simpsons too!" Lee then says, "So you're a Simpsons fan? ... now we have to check on our "boyfriends". Edna did not like what she just called the Eds.

After the Eds, the Kids, and the Kankers fix up the damages the Killers caused. Rachel then goes up to Eddy and says, "Hello there! I'm sorry to say this but I found the man of my dreams!" Eddy then sees Rachel hugs Johnny 2x4 and Eddy asks her, "Just who are you anyway?" Rachel then pouts and throws a radish at Eddy and he replies, "Did a fraggle just throw a radish at me again? Oh hi Rachel!" Rachel just giggles at Eddy's stupidity and Ed replies, "Not even I'm that dumb Rachel!" Rachel hugs Ed and says, "Ed, I think this is the beginning of a beautiful friendship!" Johnny 2x4 then says to Rachel, "You know Rachel, Plank says that if you keep using old movie quotes, you'll make this fanfic look like a CGI Dreamworks Movie!

They all just laugh at what Johnny just said.

Rachel then starts singing "Who's Johnny" by DeBarge. Edna then says to her, "You know you can stop now Rachel, the Killer Sisters aren't here anymore." Rachel replies, "I know that, it's just that I'm singing this for my boyfriend Johnny so I ask... "Who's Johnny? I said and smiled in my special way. Johnny, you know I love you, Who's johnny? I tried to look the other way, my eyes gave me away!" Johnny 2x4 blushes and covers his face with Plank. Edna and the other Eds except Ed just roll their eyes.

Lee Kanker then says to Edna, "Well anyway thanks for helping us against those "jerkfaces" but remember, we're still going to antagonize you and the other three Eds since you are still our enemy!" Edna replies, "Fine with me "buddy"!" Lee replies, "I'm not your buddy, friend! Edna replies, "I'm not your friend, girl!" Lee replies, "I'm not your girl, buddy!" Edna replies, "I'm not your buddy, friend!" Lee then yells out, "I'M NOT YOUR FRIEND GIRL!" After 5 minutes of this everyone just leaves Edna and Lee arguing even more and they went back to their normal lives.

**AND THEY ALL LIVED HAPPILY EVER AFTER...**

(The Killer Sisters laughs evily)

**WELL, MAYBE NOT!**


	13. Chapter 13! Lucky Day for the 4 Eds!

**Ed, Edd, Eddy, n Edna**

By Technomaru

Chapter **13**: "Enter the Kimono Sisters and brother! The four Eds' luckiest day!"

Note: I do not own Ed, Edd, n Eddy...but "The Fourth Ed" and the Kimono Sisters... and brother is mine! Rachel belongs to Squeaken1 though!

This is a spin-off of "The Grim ED-ventures of Ed, Edd, n Eddy". I always wondered what if Edna existed in the "Ed, Edd, n Eddy" canon and...THIS STORY DOES NOT CONTAIN SUPERNATURAL ELEMENTS!

This fanfic's new theme song is "Share the World!" from the 11th opening of "ONE PIECE" by TVXQ

Also the Kimono Sisters were OCs of mine I created back in 2002 for a proposed story for a "What if Ed, Edd, n Eddy was a Anime" thought (this was years before Powerpuff Girls Z, and I still wish the same thing happens to the Eds)

Plus I noticed that Ed, Edd, n Eddy doesn't have POSITIVE female characters because the females on this show are (censored!) And Nazz despite being sweet, sometimes can be seen laughing at or beating up the Eds but it's possible she does that only when the other kids do it. Plus I want the Eds to have NICE girlfriends who will treat them right (think "Anti-Kankers") so that's why I created the Kimono Sisters... then I created Edna because the fourth Ed should be female!

Yes, the Kimono Sisters ARE based on anime characters but I'll give you clues... One is based on a character from "Digimon Adventure 02!" another is based on a character from "Ranma 1/2" and the third one (my favorite) is based on a very popular character from 'Tenchi Muyo!"

Plus for this story I introduced... THE KIMONO BROTHER! try to figure out who he's based on!

If anyone knows how to contact Ed, Edd, n Eddy fanfic writer Morgan a.k.a. "The Morg" please let me know!

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One day when the Eds are out picking berries, they find themselves being chased by the two antagonistic Kanker sisters and then Eddy says "Oh this is great sockhead! First you forgot to bring Edna with us, and second I had no idea today is the day the Kankers go on a "boyfriend safari" while we go scamming" and then Ed says, "I got the perfect way to make them disappear...JUMANJI! (notices that they're still here) we're in big trouble guys!" Edna is running with them and says, "You got that right boys, yeah they want revenge on me too!"

And soon the 4 somehow split up

Edna is pounced on by Lee Kanker but then she gets attacked by a flying Geta sandal and Edna is saved by a mysterious stranger.

Eddy falls into a pit of mud but is then saved by a mysterious stranger.

Double D is surrounded by a swarm of monarch butterflies but is then saved by a mysterious stranger.

Ed gets tangled into a clothesline and ends up falling into a pond but is then saved by a mysterious stranger.

when all four Eds wake up they find themselves in Kimonos and in a bed, Eddy says "umm guys this kinda reminds me of the first time we met the Kanker sisters right down to the fact that we're wearing bathrobes again. Double D says "umm actually Eddy, these are kimonos" and then Ed says, "We're wearing the scales of Komodo Dragons? Cool!" and then Edna says, "No Ed, not Komodos, Kimonos, they are casual and ceremonial attire worn in Japan... In fact, the room is decorated in Japanese artifacts. Eddy says, "What I find weird is one minute I was drowning in a pit of mud and then I was rescued and here I am." Double D says "you too? I was rescued from a swarm of Monarch butterflies and I ended up here." Ed then says, "I was tangled by a clothes line and I'm now cleaned up!" Edna replies, "I saw Lee Kanker get her butt kicked before I was rescued!" Eddy then tells the other three "well before we escape, let's check this out and make sure this isn't like our first encounter with the Kankers. Edna then asks, "Speaking of Kankers I wonder whatever happened to May, Rachel, and Cousin Nazz?

**(Back at Edna's house)**

May is organizing Edna's videotape collection but then she notices a section containing weird movies, Rachel shows up and asks May, "Hi May, what's up?" May replies, "I think I found Edna's older sister's collection of weird 80's movies, there's "Monty Python and the Meaning of Life", "Forbidden Zone", "Shock Treatment", "Twice Upon a Time (HBO version), "Videodrome", "Terrorvision", "Spookies", "Meet the Hollowheads", "Time Bandits", "Brazil", and "The Adventures of Baron Munchausen"... Looks like she likes weird 80's movies... and movies by Terry Gilliam!

May then says, "Umm people keep talking about how funny Monty Python is so let's watch "Monty Python and the meaning of life" then!"

**(As for the four Eds...)**

As the Eds walk downstairs they see all kinds of Japanese stuff like swords and armor and when they get to the front room, they hear a voice that says, "I thought you four would never wake up after what you've been through" and as the four follow the voice, they were shocked at what they are seeing...

They see 2 very beautiful Japanese girls in Kimonos drinking tea and then the one with the apron on and bowls of Miso soup on her tray says "oh my, they're awake" and then another girl with short brown hair approaches them and says to them "Konnichewa friends, and welcome to the Kimono residence, I'm Hikari Kimono and this is my sister Kasumi Kimono (Kasumi hands the Eds Miso soup)" Eddy makes a look of disgust at the soup but then Double D makes a look at him that tells him to down it anyway just to respect the girls. Edna then says, "Thanks but why did you save us girls?" and then Hikari says, "Well we feel that you were in trouble and you were, we also set it up so we can fool those girls what were chasing you, why were they after you? And then Double D says "In case you girls just moved (sisters: we did!) the Kanker Sisters are a very violent group of sisters from the trailer park that terrorize everyone including us and they want to make us their boyfriends but they always mistreat us anyway in horrific ways..." Edna then continues, "except for their sister May... she's my bff!"" and then Kasumi hugs Ed and Hikari hugs Double D because they felt bad for them.

**(Edna's house)**

May and Rachel are shocked by what they are seeing, May then says to Rachel, "If this fanfic ever got a "wtf" moment... then this is definately a "wtf" moment! Rachel then says, "I find the song "Every sperm is sacred" very very catchy... even though I have no idea what they are singing about!"

Then they reach the middle of the film and they have to find the fish... only to see the bizarre images that involve a long armed guy and other surreal stuff... yet they couldn't find the fish that went... wherever they... did go!

**(Kimono house)**

Edna then hears the sound of sandals clopping on the ground and she walks into a huge garden and she sees a boy wearing geta sandals and a yellow and black striped chanchanko vest, as well as a yellow and black striped Kimono. The boy has his bangs cover his left eye. The boy leads Edna to a table with a tea set and lanterns around, the garden appears to be covered in fake grave markers. Edna then says to him, "Hello, what's your name?" The boy replies, My name is Kitaro... Kitaro Kimono. You must be one of the "Eds" my sisters rescued... and you are?"

Edna responds, "I am Edna Esmeralda Espinoza, the fourth Ed! Hey... you look just like the character from the anime my sister likes so much... Kitaro of the gegege forest!" Kitaro then says, "Yeah... I get that alot... You look like that "ugly" girl from that American show." Edna and Kitaro then say at the same time, "YEAH... I GET THAT ALOT!" They giggle and blush. Edna then lifts up Kitaro's bangs... she sees that he has two eyes!" Kitaro then says, "I like this hairstyle, plus like my sisters we are named after and resemble characters from our parents' favorite anime. I in question am named after Kitaro from "Ge Ge Ge no Kitaro". Edna holds Kitaro's hand and he blushes, Then she asks, "I wonder where Eddy went?"

Meanwhile Eddy hears J-POP in the other room and when he enters the room he sees a Japanese girl in shorts and a Black shirt, she had blue spiky hair and when she sees Eddy, she says "YO! Are you ok? You were sure dirty when I saw you (Eddy is silent and a little nervous) hey I just saved your life, aren't you gonna say something? (Eddy is still silent) what? Did I just poot?" No matter what the girl did or said, Eddy would just stand there and be nervous, so she leaves the room and takes Eddy with her and she says to her sisters, "hey sisters! I found the one I rescued but he refuses to talk to me" and then Hikari says "oh and this is my other sister Ryoko, her tastes in fashion and behavior makes us different from us and why isn't your friend talking?"

Double D then says "well I would also like to introduce ourselves too, I'm Edd but with 2 Ds or "Double D" and this lovable fellow is Ed, and this is Eddy and it appears that he doesn't know how to talk to girls... except for Edna." Eddy snaps out of his trance and says "I DO NOT!" and then the 2 get into a fight

While they Fight, Edna and Kitaro see this happen and Edna pulls Eddy away and Kitaro helps Double D. Edna then says to Eddy, "If you're fighting about your inability to talk to girls then you mister... are a big hypocrite! I'm a girl!" Eddy replies, "Yeah but you're one of my "employees", and there is no romance towards employees!" Edna then blushes and says, "Well I did develop a crush on Ed because he was the only one who said nice things about my beautymark or as he called it, "a chocolate chip" But I see he found someone and so did I!"

Edna, Hikari, and Kitaro see Ed approach Kasumi with roses. Kasumi says "Awww, how sweet of you." but before he hands them to her they die because of Ed's rancid odor and then Kasumi says "oh my!" and then Ed gets a good Idea and he suddenly runs into their onsen, takes off his clothes, holds a bar of soap in one hand and jumps in, 4 minutes later he appears squeaky clean and suddenly Eddy and Double D look mortified beyond definition, Eddy says "Lumpy took a bath! That's impossible! He's afraid of soap! (looks at Double D) hey Einstein! How did this happen to Ed? and then Double D says"...I...DON'T...KNOW!" and then Kari says, "Simple "Sockhat-kun"...true love makes people do strange things (sees Kasumi giggles and hugs Ed while dressed in a sailor fuku) yep, that's definitely strange!" Edna then adds, "I made lumpy bathe too... I mean my parents required it!"

Double D then agrees with Hikari and Edna, and then Double D and Hikari suddenly look into eachother's eyes and and Hikari says "oh Sockhat-kun!" and Double D calls her "Kari-Chan" and so they suddenly kiss while Ryoko has a hard time with Eddy.

Ryoko goes up to Eddy, then he suddenly ends up in a trance, and then she says "C'mon man, what's wrong? Hello! I got money! (waves a 500 yen coin to his face) is he really that scared of us girls?" and then Ed (covered in lipstick marks) says "well if you mostly spent your time scamming for money and girls like baby sister and the Kanker sisters would beat you up daily, this would be the result!" and then the room was silent and then went back to normal when Ed says "LIVING IN THE SIXTH DIMENSION! MOVING IN THE WRONG DIRECTION!" and then Kasumi says "oh Ed-kun! You are so cute when you act smart one minute and then back to normal in the next (kisses him)"

Ryoko then says "not even if I tell him we're actually rich so he doesn't have to scam anymore would snap him out of it?" and then Ed and Double D nod in agreement. Edna adds, "Well Eddy is how you say... more dimmer than Ed at times." Ed then says, "Not even I'm that dim Edna!" Edna then asks Hikari, "Umm what do you mean you're rich?"

Hikari then says to the Eds, "actually our parents own many businesses back in Tokyo and we even own the "Anime Taco" franchise, we were also responcible for the downfall of 4KIDS so the evil Alfred E. Khan can stop defiling our favorite anime." and then Ed says "HEAR HEAR!"

**(Edna's house)**

May and Rachel are still weirded out by "Monty Python and the Meaning of Life" and they are watching the infamous "Mr. Creosote" scene. May yells out, "OH NO... IT'S MR. CREOSOTE!!!" Rachel then asks, "Who?" May replies, "I've heard of this somewhere... It's that sketch about a big ol' fat guy in the french restaurant who throws up alot and eats alot and when they give him a thin mint wafer..."

The two see Mr. Creosote explode in a huge torrent of innards and partially digested food... revealing his open chest cavity.

Then Nazz comes over and she says to them, "Hi guys, where's Cousin Edn..." Nazz is suprised when she sees Rachel and May throw up in paper bags and Nazz then rolls her eyes and says, "Let me guess, you saw the "Mr. Creosote" scene from "Monty Python and the Meaning of Life" from Edna's older sister's collection didn't you?" The two girls nod.

Nazz continues, "Well I thought Cousin Emily told me and Edna not to see those movies in her collection until we're mature enough... oh wait I am and so is she! Umm where is she anyway?"

**(Kimono house)**

Edna looks at the dazed Eddy and she looks at him and says, "Wow... he's more zoned out than a "zoner" in the "Spiral Zone". Ryoko hears her, she giggles and tells her, "I got the joke... but Spiral Zone is also a Japanese toyline from the 80's, it was more about militaristic action rather than a American cartoon that combines "G.I. Joe", "Mad Max", and "Dawn of the Dead". Edna then says, "Really? wow! I'm liking you already Ryoko... just for that I think I'll help you here!"

Edna whispers to Ryoko as she giggles. Ryoko goes up to Eddy and hugs and kisses him as she sighs. Edna then smiles at Eddy and says, "Now isn't this better than those japanese H games your brother sent you?" Eddy just ignores what Edna just said and then he smiles and kisses Ryoko back.

Edna then says to Eddy, "There, you can trust Ryoko, she isn't bad like Sara or Lee... or Sara Lee!" Plus she's rich!" Eddy then adds 2 and 2 together: "Well despite my dislike for Sara Lee brand potato chips...a combination of money and love means... EASY STREET! C'MERE BABY!" Edna then says, "Well Kitaro hunny, love is in the air... oh sorry for bringing this up but I think we should get back to my house to check on my Nakama! I hope they don't find my older sister's tape collection!"

Kitaro smiles and says, "Your nakama is my nakama too Edna Esmeralda Espinoza... Perhaps we should check on them as well. Ryoko gets up and says, "Yeah Eddy, I bet Edna's friends are worried sick about you four.

So the Kimonos and the Eds take a long walk to the Cul-De-Sac and enter Edna's house. Nazz opens the door and says, "Hi Edna I see the Eds are with you an...OMG!!!" Nazz is speechless like Eddy upon seeing the Kimonos. Edna then says to Kitaro, "I guess cousin Nazz has heard of you and your sisters." Nazz then squeals with delight and shakes hands with Hikari Kimono while saying to Hikari, "Oh my gosh, I am such a huge fan! You're all like the most richest kids who are under 20! Boys want you and girls want to be you!"

Hikari then blushes and says, "Thanks, but I have "sockhat-kun" now!" So the boys miss out!" Nazz looks at Double D and says to him, "You are soooo lucky! The Kimonos are definatly the most richest celebrities in all of Japan!" Double D blushes and Ryoko then says in mock-embarassment, "Oh stop "Edna's cousin"! We're not all THAT great! Anyway we're here to check on Edna's nakama, I heard they saw a sick movie!" Nazz replies, "How did you know?" and Edna answers, "Oh c'mon it's obvious... they would get into the collection if left by themselves!"

Nazz leads the Eds and Kimonos to Edna's guestroom and they see May and Rachel lying down with wash cloths over their eyes. Edna then says, "Hey...if you're going to get into my older sisters' videos... let me know ok? And please refrain from watching gross movies!" May smiles and says, "Edna, it's you!" Edna then replies, "Yep! I'm not alone!" Kitaro holds May's hand and says to her, "Charmed to meet you, Edna has said alot of things about you." May blushes and says, "You got a man Edna?" Edna replies as she blushes, "Does Kevin say "dork"?" The two giggle and Rachel takes off her cloth and sees Kitaro and tells Edna, "Wow... I see you've been a really good girl this year!"

Kitaro chuckles at the comment and says, "So you two must be May Kanker and Rachel Carlyle, pleased to meet you, I am Kitaro Kimono of the Kimono family... my older sisters apparently love the Eds and will be dating them." May takes off her cloth and asks, "What? You mean to tell me that "big Ed" and Double D have girlfriends now?" Kitaro then says, "Yes... is there something wrong? May then thinks and says, "Umm nope there isn't, I had a crush on Ed back when I was one of "them" but I think I should stick with the two Eds as friends... at least they let me hang out with them and Eddy learned by now not to be mean to me since I saved his life."

Edna and Rachel look at eachother, knowing the two have boyfriends now, Edna then says, "Don't worry May, I'll personally help you find someone... even though there aren't many boys here in the Cul-de-sac." May then makes teary eyes and says, "Are you planning to fix me up with Kevin?" Edna then makes a weird look at May... then the two laugh together as Edna states, "Yeah right... if he doesn't deserve Cousin Nazz then what makes me think he deserves you? You're better than him!" May then says, "Wow... that really makes my day hearing that, now that I'm better I'd like to meet Ed's new girlfriend!" Edna then says, "May! If you going to do so, please don't make the scene look like something from that dating show "Ex-treme Dating!" It's really evil what happens in that game!"

May then meets up with Kasumi Kimono who turns around and asks, "Oh my, would you like some ramen?" May is shocked as she is handed the ramen. Kasumi then says to May, "You must be May Kanker, Edna's said alot of good things about you... Ed mentioned you as well." May then says, "Umm... I'm Ed's friend... after all they took me in when my sisters treated me badly."

Kasumi then says, "You don't have to stretch the truth May... Ed told me everything about you and do not worry... I will treat him well and any nakama of his and Edna's is my nakama as well." Kasumi just closes her eyes and smiles. May then thinks to herself, "Big Ed" finally hit the jackpot... I have full confidence that Edna would help me out!" May then says to Kasumi, "You know I should be glad Ed has you, you seem like the type who will look out for him and you're very good to him." Kasumi just smiles and says, "Edna's right, you being with her has made you smarter."

Hikari then says, "Well our day is pretty much made now that we have the Eds as our boyfriends... I mean the male Eds! (The male Eds blush) So in order to celebrate... we shall throw a Japanese festival... right here in the Cul-de-sac! I mean the townsfolk should be "culture-shocked" to find this here!"

The four Eds are shocked, the other Kimonos are suprised, Rachel smiles in delight, and May is glad to attend a festival. So plans are underway for the Japanese Festival... as well as the four Eds' dates with the four Kimonos.

**Next Time: The night of the festival!**


	14. Night of the Festival!

**Ed, Edd, Eddy, n Edna**

By Technomaru

Chapter 14: "The Night of the Festival!"

Note: I do not own Ed, Edd, n Eddy...but "The Fourth Ed" and the Kimono Sisters... and brother is mine! Rachel belongs to Squeaken1 though!

This is a spin-off of "The Grim ED-ventures of Ed, Edd, n Eddy". I always wondered what if Edna existed in the "Ed, Edd, n Eddy" canon and...THIS STORY DOES NOT CONTAIN SUPERNATURAL ELEMENTS! The Kimono Sisters were also from that story but Kitaro Kimono is exclusive to this story!

This fanfic's new theme song is "Share the World!" from the 11th opening of "ONE PIECE" by TVXQ

If anyone knows how to contact Ed, Edd, n Eddy fanfic writer Morgan a.k.a. "The Morg" please let me know!

**In Memory of**

**Dom Deluise**

**1933-2009**

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**(Later that night)**

The Cul-De-Sac is decorated with luminated paper lanterns and banners. Stands are put up and offering japanese food as well as games such as "goldfish catching" and a stand that has anime character masks on sale are on display. All the kids except Kevin are informed that this festival was put up by the Kimono Siblings in celebration that they moved to Peach Creek... and found true love in the four Eds.

Johnny 2x4 and Rachel are walking to the Taiko drum tower and Rachel says to Johnny "Good thing the Kimonos gave us this job... we'd do a real "bang-up job!" Johnny just laughs at the joke and they climb up the tower. As they made it to the top of the Taiko drum tower, the two are just banging away while Johnny sings "Bang on the drum all day" by Todd Rundgren, Rachel just giggles and sighs as she continues to bang on the taiko drum. Rachel drops her drumsticks and hugs Johnny, telling him, "It feels so good to be loved... Thank you Johnny!"

Johnny picks up Plank and tells Rachel, "Plank doesn't have anyone to love..." Rachel think thinks and says to Johnny, "Hmm... I have a idea!" Rachel then notices a lone plank of wood, cleans it up, and drawns on it with a red marker, making a feminine face. Rachel then presents to Johnny and Plank a female version of Plank, Rachel then says to Plank, "Plank, meet "Splinter"!" Johnny looks at Plank and Johnny then says to Rachel... Plank says he's in love!"

**(As for the four Eds)**

The male Eds are in Kimonos and Eddy says, "Thank goodness this get up is unisex! Now where are the girls and boy?" Eddy then sees a stand selling masks and sees most of them are Ryoko Hakubi from "Tenchi Muyo!" Eddy then says, "In a way that's kinda creepy..." Then one of the "masks" moves towards him and kisses him. Eddy anime-falls while the real Ryoko Kimono giggles and reveals herself.

Double D then says to Ryoko, "Wow... that was a unusual scare-tactic... so that show is still popular in Japan?" Ryoko then replies, "Yep! Also since we Kimonos resemble anime characters... that is our favorite trick to pull on people... I know Kitaro did that to Edna!"

Double D then asks, "Umm where's Edna anyway?" Ed replies, "Yeah and where's your sisters!"

**(Meanwhile in another part of the festival)**

Rolf looks around and asks himself, "What kind of revalry is this... this international custom is more crazier than my international customs!" Edna then stops in front of Rolf and asks, "Hi Rolf, what's up?" Rolf notices Edna in a blue and red kimono and says to her, "Ah yes... hello "Ed-girl who is full of common sense"! Who is the cyclops next to you?" Edna then notices Kitaro Kimono behind her and says to Rolf, "Well that's my boyfriend Kitaro Kimono... the other Eds are dating Kitaro's sisters! Oh and Kitaro has two eyes... his hair just covers one of them like Marie Kanker's hair."

Rolf then asks, "Speaking of Kanker Sore where be the blonde haired one you befriended?" Edna replies, "Well she is going to get us some roast corn with Cousin Nazz... oh that reminds me I'm supposed to meet up with Ed, Double D, and Eddy as well as their dates Ryoko, Hikari, and Kasumi!"

So Edna and Kitaro run into Hikari and Kasumi Kimono. Kasumi shows a plastic bag containing two goldfish to Edna and Kitaro and says to them, "Wait till Ed sees them..." Hikari then says to Edna and Kitaro, "I see the boys and Ryoko, let's meet up with them!" As they run to the others, Sarah and Jimmy are trying to catch goldfish with paper nets.

And so Edna, Kitaro, and his sisters end up meeting the male Eds and Ryoko, While talking about what to do next, Kevin sees the Kimono Sisters and thinks to himself, "Wow... they're hot! Especially the blue haired one!" Kevin then shoves Eddy and says, "Out of the way dork! Hello ladies I'm Kevin and one of the coolest guys in the Cul-de-sac! Date me and I'll make your dreams come true!" The Kimono Girls frown (except Kasumi) at Kevin and Hikari then says, "Sorry Mr. Arrogant boy but our dreams are already coming true..." Ryoko gets angry and shouts, "AND YOU SHOVED MY BOYFRIEND!!!"

Kevin then looks at Eddy and says to Ryoko, "That's your boyfriend? You'll regret dating that DORK!" Ryoko then says as she grabs Kevin by the collar, "Listen here... the only thing you'll regret is being a jerk to everyone you think isn't popular as you are... So watch your "P"s and "Q"s or the letter "H" will fall on you! (The letter "H" falls on Kevin's head) See?"

Kevin then says, "No fair! Why are those dorks so lucky to end up with "hotties" like yourselves... well what if I refuse to treat the Eds with dignity?" Kasumi goes up to him and flicks him in the forehead and tells him, "Be nice!". Kevin covers the spot Kasumi flicks and says, "Forget you "dorks" I'm outta here!" Edna then says, "I'm so glad Cousin Nazz finally realizes what kind of a "meanie bo-beanie" he really is!"

As Kevin leaves, Ryoko shouts at him, "By the way! Edna told me all about you and why you're obsessed with the word "dork"... "teeny weenie"!" Kevin then angerly charges at Edna. Before Kitaro Kimono can protect Edna, Kasumi shields Edna and Kevin then says, "Huh... I can't attack you... why can't I attack you?" Kasumi then flicks him in the forehead. Kevin is about to punch Kasumi in the face but his fist won't let him." Kevin then gives up and Kasumi tells him, "Try to reflect on your bad behavior and try work well with others ok?" Kevin then says, "Now I have to leave before something weirder happens..."

Double D then says, "Wow Kasumi... how did you do that?" Kasumi then closes her eyes and smiles while Hikari replies to Double D's question, "Well we don't know either but Kasumi is pretty maternal towards us, mom taught her very well... Ed must be lucky to be with her as much as I'm lucky to be with you, Eddy with Ryoko, and little brother with Edna!" Double D blushes and gives Hikari a present with a nicely tied bow. When Hikari opens it she sees a very nice pair of socks. Hikari blushes like crazy and hugs Double D like mad. Edna looks on and says to Double D, "I told her what you do if you REALLY found "the one"... you give her socks!" So the Eds and Kimonos continue to walk around the festival.

And as the four Eds were walking the festival with the four Kimonos, they suddenly bump into Lee and Marie Kanker, they appear angry and for some reason they are wearing Kimonos and sandals as well. Lee asks Eddy, "Hey lover boy! Who's that girl with you?" Ryoko then says to her, "I know you... you're the one who chased my man in the first place and his friend Edna says you abuse your sister!" Edna asks Marie, "Umm where did you and your sister get those Kimonos, they look nice."

Marie blushes a bit and says to Edna, "Ummm... the internet? But don't change the subject, who is that girl with my man?" Hikari then replies, "For your information, that is my boyfriend!" Marie grinds her teeth and Lee then sees Kitaro and says, "I know you! You kicked your geta sandal at my face when I was about to pound Edna!" Kitaro then says, "That's right! Just like my girlfriend... I do not stand bullying and I must do what it takes to end bullying.

Lee sees the Kimono Siblings and Edna and says to them, "I see you as threats and therefore I will pound every one and each of you all... except for the girl near Ed... she's giving me a weird vibe." Kasumi just smiles.

As Lee pulls out a spiked club like Japanese "Oni" carry, Ryoko then shouts, "A FIGHT HUH? I'M GOING TO FIGHT FOR THE HONOR OF MY SIBLINGS... AND MY MAN!" Ryoko kicks the club off of Lee's hands and they start throwing punches at eachother, pulling hair, etc. Eddy sees this and shouts, "WHOO HOO! A CATFIGHT!" Lee and Ryoko then shout, "GET YOUR MIND OUT OF THE GUTTER EDDY!" And continue fighting.

Marie sees Hikari and then Marie says, "You know... I'm just going to watch this fight, they seem equally matched!" Hikari then says to Marie, "Well Ryoko is definately different from me, Kasumi and Kitaro. May and Nazz were walking to the Eds with the roast corn on a stick but then to their horror they see the two tough girls fighting eachother.

Nazz then says, "Umm let me guess... Lee wants Eddy again but Ryoko isn't going to give up without a fight." Marie and Hikari nod. Edna then asks May, "Ok... how did this whole Ed-Kanker feud start anyway? I think this has gone far enough! I mean there HAS to be a reason why they act like this all the time... like what do they have against you Eds?" Marie responds, "You know after so many episodes and fanfiction chapters... I forgot!" Ed steps up and says, "I admit something... I pooted!"

As the girls cover their noses Double D then says to the girls, "Actually... this whole thing started back in the episode "Nagged to Ed" They were actually nice to us and we were so stupidly misogynistic to them so pretty much in Eddy's words..." Eddy continues, "They were nice and we were jerks!"

Edna gets a idea... she tells the three male Eds, "Why don't you just apologize to them for that incident?" Double D then says, "You know... I never thought of that!" Eddy yells out, "Oh no... I'd never apologize to them... let alone even talk to them!" May then says to Eddy, "You talk to me... sometimes!" Eddy then says, "Yeah but common sense kicked in this time and I will not speak to you Kankers at all!"

Edna grabs Eddy by the shoulder and points at Ryoko, "You see that? She is fighting for you and unless you do exactly like I said, not only will Lee continue to be a jerk to you but Ryoko will be black and blue... so will you do it?" Eddy then says, "Umm... what if I refuse?" Kasumi goes up to him and flicks him in the forehead. Eddy covers the spot Kasumi flicks and says, "Ok ok... Umm Lee... Marie... May... We're sorry we yelled at you the first day we met... you were nice and we were jerks!" Ed then says in a sorrowful voice, "We are so sorry!" Double D then says, "Yes we are so very sorry!"

**(Silence)**

Lee stopped fighting Ryoko, Marie was shocked, and May was just confused. The three were confused at this, being unsure of what to do if such a thing ever happened. Lee then says to Marie, "Maybe we should leave... this is messing with my head..."

As the two leave the festival, Hikari then shouts, "WAIT!" Lee and Marie turn around as Hikari goes up to them and says, "As one of the represenatives of the Kimono clan... and Sockhat-Kun's girlfriend... I invite you to this festival as intended... besides Edna told me you aren't so bad... THIS IS BAD!" And with that Hikari pulls out a photo of the Killer Sisters while scary music plays in the background. Lee and Marie cringe in fear and Lee shouts, "GET IT AWAY! GET IT AWAY!" Hikari then says, "So how about it? You want to join the festivities?"

Lee then says, "Well... I guess I can forget being tough just for this night... and the Eds DID apologize to us... AND we're not like..."them" Ok... We'll join!"

And with that, the two Kankers joined the Eds, Kimonos, and all the other friends. Lee then walks up to Edna and asks, "You know... you seem alright! But what do you see in those three? And May?" Edna replies, "Well Ed, Edd, n Eddy are alot like me... except not coulrophobic, plus I think it's about time they should have a fourth member who happens to be a girl. As for May well... she's kinda like me and is very misunderstood so I took her under my wing and try to improve her life for the best... corn?" Lee then accepts the roast corn from Edna as Edna continues, "Umm perhaps we should form a peace treaty between Kanker and Ed... I mean you're not the Kil..." Lee covers Edna's mouth and says, "Ok ok I'll think about it! Please don't mention them ever again!"

The Eds are dancing around the Taiko Drum tower as Japanese music plays, Ryoko goes up to Eddy and kisses her and asks him, "Now was it that hard?" Eddy then answers, "Yeah... as hard as beating Bald Bull on "Mike Tyson's Punch-Out!" Edna then smirks at Eddy and says, "Well... now I know who's been getting into my NES..." Eddy just looks at her confused while everyone dances.

Edna and May then see a Karaoke machine in a stand and just for fun, they decide to sing "Dangerous" by Roxette in a duet. Soon every watches them and applauds. Double D then says to Marie, "In case you didn't know Edna seems to like the 80's alot compared to Eddy's love of everything 70's!" Marie then asks Double D, "May can sing?" Hikari answers her question, "I guess so! She can sing pop!"

As the Japanese Festival is about to end, Kasumi shows Ed the fish she caught in the game, Ed then says, "How cute! I'm going to name them "Ranma" and "Akane"!" Kasumi just smiles and giggles because she got the joke. Kasumi asks Ed, "You watch "Ranma 1/2" too?" Ed replies, "What's "Ranma 1/2"?" Kitaro then walks Edna back to her house and she blushes as he holds her hand.

Later that night, Edna has a very good dream and it involves herself in a room with May Kanker.... And the three Eds and Kimono Siblings that is filled with 99 red balloons and they are all dancing to "99 Luftballons" playing in the background. Eddy then asks Ryoko, "Didn't we do this joke a few chapters ago? And why is there a hand in the side throwing the 99 red balloons at us?" Ryoko answered, "Because "Scrubs" got cancelled so this is a good time to parody it... also ignore the technical goof!" Ed sees the hand throwing the balloon and shouts, "HI TOMMY!"

**Next Time: Rachel tells Johnny and plank a bedtime story which involves the four Eds as animals... forming a band... going to a town! And you'll never guess what the story is a retelling of!**


	15. The Animals of Bremen

**Ed, Edd, Eddy, n Edna**

By Technomaru

Chapter 15: "The Animals of Bremen!"

Note: I do not own Ed, Edd, n Eddy...but "The Fourth Ed" and the Kimono Sisters... and brother is mine! Rachel belongs to Squeaken1 though!

This is a spin-off of "The Grim ED-ventures of Ed, Edd, n Eddy". I always wondered what if Edna existed in the "Ed, Edd, n Eddy" canon and...THIS STORY DOES NOT CONTAIN SUPERNATURAL ELEMENTS!

If anyone knows how to contact Ed, Edd, n Eddy fanfic writer Morgan a.k.a. "The Morg" please let me know!

This strange story is a retelling of the classic Brothers Grimm story "Town Musicians of Bremen" and here is the casting call...

Ed = Donkey

Edd = Rooster

Eddy = Dog

Edna = Cat

The Kanker Sisters = Robbers

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**(This chapter takes place the night after the Japanese Festival ends... and at Johnny and Plank's house)**

Johnny 2x4 and Plank are resting in bed. Rachel shows up and says, "You know I kinda find it weird that your parents wanted me to babysit you while they are gone... yet you're my boyfriend." Johnny then says, "Yeah I know... got a bedtime story?" Rachel then thinks and says to Johnny, "I dunno... got any good ones?' Johnny then pulls out a book and says, "How about me and Plank's favorite, "Conrad the Lonely Stump"?"

Rachel then puts the book down and tells Johnny, "I know one... it's a classic fairy tale... it has animals!"

Johnny makes a grin as he lays in bed and Rachel tells the story...

"Once Upon a Time..."

There were four animals, a donkey, a dog, a cat, and a rooster. And with the exception of the donkey the other animals were owned by owners who were total jerks... a cat was mistreated for sparing mice and befriending them, the dog kept peeing on things at random, and the rooster's owner was mad at him for not laying eggs as the owner thought he was a hen.

But one night, they decided to ditch their homes and set out together. Then Ed the donkey leaves his home and says to the other three animals, "GRAVY! Ummm I mean how are you fellow animals? Hee Haw!" Eddy the dog then pees on a rock and says, "We're blowing our pop-stands as our owners are total jerkasses!" Edna the cat then says as she stretches, "Yeah! Despite our differences we are still normal animals yet those meanie-bo-beanies won't recognize this! Mew!" Edd the rooster then replies, "There's got to be a place where we belong, a purpose and I hope it doesn't involve me cock-fighting Bawk ba-gawk!"

Then a Mermaid who resembles Nazz jumps on a rock from the sea, she is seen wearing a T-shirt that reads "Criminal". The Mermaid then says to the four animals, "Hey dudes... Why don't you just go to the town of Bremen? It's where freedom is everywhere, live life without owners and become musicians there." And with that The mermaid jumps off the rock and swims away.

The four animals look at eachother confusingly. Eddy then says as he pees on a rock, "That's a good idea! Live the life without jerk-ass owners (No offence Ed), freedom everywhere..." Ed interrupts, ...AND BE MUSICIANS!!!" Edna then says, "Umm I like the idea but... how can animals like ourselves be musicians... animals CAN'T be musicians!"

Eddy then says, "Umm... What about "Melvin and the Squirrels"? Ed interrupts once more, "Don't you mean "Alvin and the Chipmunks"?" Eddy then pees on a tree and says, "Ed don't be such a "smart-ass"... no offence!" Ed just smiles and says, "Non taken! Hee Haw!"

And so they trek to the town of Bremen to find a purpose. Ed then says to his friends, "How about I sing a song to lighten the mood?" Before the three can say anything, Ed just sings "Bink's Sake"...

"Yohohoho Yohohoho!

Yohohoho Yohohoho!

Yohohoho Yohohoho!

Yohohoho Yohohoho!

Go and deliver Bink's Sake  
Entrust your heart to the waves and sea breeze  
Even the setting sun revels beyond the tides  
And in the sky, the song of laughing birds"

Edna then says, "You know despite the loud braying of our friend, that song sounds nice." Eddy then says as he pees on a tree, "Yeah at it's a song about beer and pirates!" Double D then says, "Well the Mermaid suggested we should be musicians when we get to Bremen so.. let us sing away!"

They all join in...

""Yohohoho Yohohoho!

Yohohoho Yohohoho!

Yohohoho Yohohoho!

Yohohoho Yohohoho!"

But then the animals see a lighted cottage, upon further inspection they see three female robbers enjoying the money and jawbreakers they pilfered from those who pass this way. Ed then says, "I'm hungry.. hee haw!" Edna then thinks, If we perform for those ladies... maybe they'll give us food! Ok let's stand on eachother's backs and give them a performance... mew!"

So the four animals stand on eachother's backs and start singing "Bink's Sake"

As the three robbers hear the animals' "music", Lee then asks Marie, "Ok, was that you going "yohohoho"?" Marie then replies, "Don't look at me, I'm a robber, not a pirate!" May then says, "I think it might be a snipe... LET'S GET OUT OF HERE!"

The three robbers run out the house and then Edna says to her friends, "Look at that, Not only did they like our song, but in gratitude they gave us their house..." Ed interrupts Edna, "WITH YUM YUMS FOR ED! HEE HAW!" So the animals were eating a good meal (And Eddy finds a toilet instead of peeing on trees that time) and decide to settle in for the night.

Later that night, the robbers return to investigate what was in their cottage earlier. Lee Kanker then says to her sisters, "Ok, I will go in there since I'm the toughest and I'll give that intruder a rude awakening!" And with that, Lee's noises woke up the four animals, thinking a snipe invaded the cottage, decide to defend themselves.

Lee lights up a candle in the dark and sees the eyes of the Edna the cat shining in the darkness. Lee reaches over to light her candle, thinking she sees the coals of the fire and suddenly, things happen in quick succession: Edna swipes Lee's face with her claws, Ed picks up his hooves and kicks her, Eddy pees on Lee's leg, and Double D crows and chases Lee out the door, screaming.

May and Marie see Lee running out the door and after Marie asks Lee, "What happened in there? Who attacked you?" Lee replies, "It was a horrible witch! She scratched me with her long fingers,

(image of Edna the cat scratching Lee)

a mad scientist with acidic water,

(image of Eddy the dog peeing on Lee)

a ogre who hit me with a club,

(image of Ed the donkey kicking Lee)

and worst of all... the devil appeared and screamed at me from the rooftop!"

(image of Double D the rooster crowing and chasing Lee)

And thinking their cottage was haunted by strange creatures, the other two robbers were so frightened, that all three of them ran off into the nearest town and were caught by Constable Melonhead who recognized them from their wanted posters.

Ed panics and says, "Uh no guys... there is a strange creature in the cottage!" Edna then says, "Relax pal, those mean humans think we're the strange creatures so we scared them off and I guess this is our cottage now." Double D then says, "I have to agree with you Edna... at least we don't have to deal with abusive owners back in our hometown.

Eddy then says, "I need to wet my whistle, better check the cupboard for something to drink!" When Eddy opens the cupboard he sees a columbian guy with a cup of coffee in his hand, handing Eddy a cup of coffee. The columbian guy sees Ed and says, "Mi burro! I am so good to you... why did you run away amigo?" Edna looks at Ed and says, "Your owner is Juan Valdez the coffee guy? He's a nice guy! Why did you leave him?" Ed replies, "I followed you guys because you are so cool.. HEE HAW!" Eddy then says as he pees on a tree outside, "At least someone thinks I'm cool!"

Juan Valdez sees the other three animals and the cottage and says, "I think I should adopt you animals and I split whatever I make with my coffee towards you all..." Edna, Eddy, and Double D then smile and Edna says, "I'm liking that guy more! He would make a nice master!" Double D then says, "I guess happiness can be found in home and not in a town like Bremen!"

Juan Valdez then says to Ed and his friends, "How about I make great use of this cottage?"

**(Two months later)**

The cottage becomes an extremely popular coffee shop called "Bremen Perk" ("Central Perk" and "Spider's Cafe" were already taken) and as for the animals' idea of being musicians you may ask?

As many cafe-goers look on stage, they see Ed the donkey playing a piano, Double D the rooster playing a accordion, Eddy the dog playing a violin, and Edna the cat on drums. The special guest singer is none other than Brook the Skeleton... and they sing... what else? Bink's Sake!

"Yohohoho Yohohoho!

Yohohoho Yohohoho!

Yohohoho Yohohoho!

Yohohoho Yohohoho!

Go and deliver Bink's Sake  
Entrust your heart to the waves and sea breeze  
Even the setting sun revels beyond the tides  
And in the sky, the song of laughing birds"

The four animals then notice a boy cat, a girl donkey, a girl dog, and a girl hen... and they are all wearing kimonos and applading for them!

**AND SO THEY LIVED HAPPILY EVER AFTER! **Even though they never made it to Bremen!

Johnny and Plank are apparently asleep and Rachel just tucks him into bed and before she goes to the kitchen for a snack she wonders one thing, "If I was in the story, I wonder what animal I would be?"

(Rachel pictures herself as a monkey)

Rachel then says to herself, "Well I'll be a Monkey's aunt." As she giggles.

**Next Time: I have no idea what the next chapter should be about!**


	16. CHILLER

**Ed, Edd, Eddy, n Edna**

By Technomaru

Chapter 16: **ED, EDD, EDDY, N EDNA'S CHILLER**

Note: I do not own Ed, Edd, n Eddy...but "The Fourth Ed" and the Kimono Sisters... and brother is mine! Rachel belongs to Squeaken1 though and Jennifer (a upcoming OC) belongs to Yukimizuno!

This is a spin-off of "The Grim ED-ventures of Ed, Edd, n Eddy". I always wondered what if Edna existed in the "Ed, Edd, n Eddy" canon and...THIS STORY DOES NOT CONTAIN SUPERNATURAL ELEMENTS!

I'm doing this as a tribute of one of the most influencial icons of rock... Michael Jackson!

**IN MEMORY OF**

**Michael Jackson**

**1958-2009**

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On a dark night...

Edna and May Kanker are at the movie theaters seeing "One Piece the movie 13: Zombies vs Pirates: Adventure in Thriller Bark" May Kanker cringes at the sight of Gecko Moria removing Luffy's Shadow and bringing Oz to life. Then she shivers when the Straw Hat Pirates fight zombies. May leaves the theater and then Edna says, "C'mon May! It was just a movie! And a animated one at that!" May then says, "Zombies scare me, I hope I never see one as long as I live!" Edna then responds, "Well It's getting late anyway, we better go home and turn in, tomorrow we're going to berry picking with Kasumi Kimono."

May then says, "Well that sounds good, thanks for taking me with you to the movies, sorry I got scared during the movie."

The two are unaware that they have just entered a graveyard and then Rachel reads a poem to the readers:

"Darkness falls across the land  
The midnite hour is close at hand  
Creatures crawl in search of blood  
To terrorize yawls neighbourhood  
And whosoever shall be found  
Without the soul for getting down  
Must stand and face the hounds of "heck"  
And rot inside a corpses shell  
The foulest stench is in the air  
The funk of forty thousand years  
And grizzy ghouls from every tomb  
Are closing in to seal your doom  
And though you fight to stay alive  
Your body starts to shiver  
For no mere mortal can resist  
The evil of the CHILLER... I said Chiller, not Thriller!"

Suddenly, Zombies rise from their graves as they approach the two girls, then May sees them and screams, hiding behind Edna, May then shivers in fear as she says, "Oh no! our friends are the living dead!"

The zombies turn out to be zombified versions of Ed, Edd, n Eddy (who is holding a sign that reads "WE'RE NOT THE ED, EDD, N EDDY ZOMBIES) Nazz, Lee Kanker, Marie Kanker, Johnny 2x4, Rolf, Kevin, Sara, Jimmy, a girl named Jennifer, Rachel, Ryoko Kimono, Hikari Kimono, Kasumi Kimono, and Kitaro Kimono.

They surround May and Edna. May shivers and then she turns around... She sees Edna as a zombie in a red jacket and wearing a single white glove! May screams....

Edna then moves towards her with the horde of zombies and they appear to be dancing... then they start dancing to a certain beat and it's very impressive, such impressive choreography. The zombies then lean forward a seemingly impossible distance while a rat named "Ben" runs by. Edna suddenly sings while the zombie horde dances...

"Cause this is Chiller, not "Thriller",

And no ones gonna save us from music copyrights,

You know it's Chiller, Chiller night,

You're fighting for your life inside a killer, chiller...

(Edna moonwalks then continues singing)

Chiller, not "Thriller",

cause there are those who report the use of music like this,

Chiller, Chiller night,

So let us make a parody and share a Killer, diller, thriller,

Chiller here tonight!

(Zombie Eddy grabs his crotch while dancing and Zombie Ryoko conks his head with a club)

Cause this is Chiller, not 'Thriller",

cuz "Wacko Jacko" owns the real lyrics to this song,

Chiller, Chiller night,

Let's settle with a parody and share a Killer, Chiller, Oww!"

The Zombies continue dancing while May Kanker escapes the graveyard and she ends up tripping and falling into a mausoleum and to her horror, the zombies see her and they completely blocked the entry while Zombie Ed, Edd, Eddy, n Edna approach her and she lets out a loud scream and Zombie Edna grabs her...

May Kanker finds herself back at Edna's house and everything is all right as it turns out to be a dream. Edna then asks May "What's the problem? Did you eat something that didn't agree with you?" May then says, "I had a horrible nightmare that involves zombies and great choreography and..." Edna then laughs and says, "Well it sure beats having a nightmare involving the Killer Sisters! Now c'mon, let's go berry picking!" May then gives Edna a big hug and the two walk out of the house... but not before Edna gives the readers a creepy smile while her eyes glow...

**THE END...?**

"Any similarity to actual events or persons living, dead (or undead) is purely coincidental."

**RIP**

**Michael Jackson**


	17. Sara, Jimmy, and Kasumi side story

**Ed, Edd, Eddy, n Edna**

By Technomaru

Chapter 17: "Sara and Jimmy's Excellent Adventure!"

or

"Kasumi's fun day picking berries!"

Note: I do not own Ed, Edd, n Eddy...but "The Fourth Ed" and the Kimono Sisters... and brother is mine! Rachel belongs to Squeaken1 though! and the new OC Jennifer belongs to yukimizuno.

This is a spin-off of "The Grim ED-ventures of Ed, Edd, n Eddy". I always wondered what if Edna existed in the "Ed, Edd, n Eddy" canon and...THIS STORY DOES NOT CONTAIN SUPERNATURAL ELEMENTS! except for the last chapter as a parody of "Micheal Jackson's Thriller"... I am still sad about the passing of the king of pop!

I have seen the "Ed, Edd, n Eddy Big Picture show" and Nazz's official last name is "Van Fartenshmeer" so in this story, the Van Fartenshmeers and the Espinozas are closely related!

I wrote this chapter as a responce to a fan who wanted me to go through one chapter Ed-less and more focused on other characters.

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It was a bright June day and... I think it's time to focus on the less focused characters Sara and Jimmy rather than the four Eds this time!

Sara and Jimmy are just playing with dolls on a sandbox. Jimmy then asks Sara, "Umm Sara, what do you think of Nazz's Cousin?" Sara then replies, "Well she is nice and does keep my brother and his friends in check, plus she did buy us some fudge and pocky, why do you ask?" Jimmy replies, "Well Sara, it's just that... she's a Ed... I thought you dislike the Eds due to their constant scamming and timfoolery."

It took Sara long and hard to figure this one out and she said to Jimmy, "I never really thought of that, also ever since Edna moved to the neighborhood only Eddy is seen scamming while Edna and the other three go on adventuring... well then again Edna did befriend the nice girl who saved me from one of those psychotic girls from Lemon Brook." Jimmy shivers and says, "Gee Sara, you shouldn't bring up those girls, they're more psychotic than you!"

Sara seems annoyed and then says, "Good point, they actually smoke and carry around switchblades... the only bad trait about Edna is befriending a Kanker." Jimmy then replies, "But Sara, May isn't like the others, she actually made Mr. Yum Yum a new business suit and supplied us with Teddy Grahams for our tea parties."

Sara then thinks for a while and says to Jimmy, "Well Edna does seem to be a miracle worker... it's a miracle that May isn't a jerk if she's her friend. Plus Ed hasn't been bothering us lately." Remembering the day the Kimonos arrived in the Cul-de-sac Sara then says to Jimmy, "Oooh right, because Ed is dating that nice girl who prepares tea for us and reads to us... her brother is cute!" Jimmy then replies to Sara, "You mean Kitaro? He sometimes helps me out with Hockey practice and saved me from a wild dog yesterday, he's a good fellow."

Elsewhere, Nazz and Rachel are playing tennis. Then they see a girl with medium length, dark chestnut brown hair. She wore a hunter green t-shirt that went to her waistline that had two, white vertical lines on the right side of her shirt. She wore a pair of khakis that went a little past her mid shin and a pair of black and white tennis shoes with white footy socks to put the whole look together.

Nazz then says to Rachel, "Oh this is my new friend who moved from a distant town called tuscaloosa, her name is Jennifer. She would like to play tennis with us." Jennifer meekly says "H..hello!" Then accidentally knocks a tennis ball out of the court.

Back to the playground, Sara and Jimmy see a flying tennis ball and Jimmy says to Sara, "Oh look Sara! A magic tennis ball! Make a wish!" Sara rolls her eyes and says to Jimmy, "Oh brother! I guess someone must've lost it so I guess we'll have to return it."

And so they wander off into the woods searching for the lost tennis ball. Soon fear overcomes them when they go farther and farther. Jimmy then says, "Oh no Sara, I have nightmares of this place! There are three things that might go after us: wild animals, the Kankers, and the bad men from that movie Edna saw who make men squeal like pigs.

Sara rolls her eyes and tells Jimmy, "Oh for cryin' out loud, there are no wild animals here, the Kankers must be on good terms with us ever since those Lemon Brook girls were here, and it's just a movie! In fact why were you watching that movie with Edna?" Jimmy then replies to Sara, "Well Nazz and Edna were having a good laugh with it and they thought I was mature and I saw it with them... made me think twice about camping!"

**(Meanwhile in another part of the woods)**

Kasumi Kimono was walking in the woods in her new red hood, picking up some berries for her siblings and her boyfriend Ed. Then she sees the "Park n' Flush" trailer park and thinks to herself, "Oh my, I never saw this place before, Oh well, time to continue some berry picking."

Kasumi then sees two familiar looking girls, Lee and Marie Kanker! Lee then says, "Well, well, well! It's one of those girls who took our men!" Marie then says to Lee, "I dunno about her, she became Ed's boyfriend... plus she was friendly to us and invited us to the festival they threw in the Cul-De-Sac". Lee pounds Marie in the head and says, "Who cares! She is still a threat, (sees the berries) Hey that looks good! Gimmie!" Kasumi then says, "First off you shouldn't hit your sister and sorry but... if you want to have some berries you have to ask nicely, ok?"

Lee then shakes up and Marie tells her, "I warned you about her, she's the one Kimono who has this strange "vibe" that causes anyone around her to be "peaceful" and getting along with others." Lee then has a idea, "Hey umm you... wanna come to our humble abode for a bit and share of those berries?" Kasumi just smiles and says, "Sure". Then Kasumi enters the trailer while Lee and Marie laugh maniacally.

**(After 10 Minutes in the trailer, the trailer shakes and the sound of crying can be heard)**

Kasumi is making popcorn which causes the trailer to shake while Lee and Marie are crying. Lee shouts in sadness, "WE CAN'T HELP WHO WE ARE, NOBODY LIKES US AND AFTER EDNA MOVED IN AND THE KILLER SISTERS INCIDENT WE'RE NOBODIES... EVEN MAY HATES US!" Marie then shouts in sadness, "YEAH! NO ONE'S EVER TREATED US THIS NICELY... DESPITE ALL THE MEAN STUFF WE'VE DONE IN THE PAST!"

Kasumi just smiles and says, "There, now doesn't that feel better letting all that out? You know you three are not bad compared to those girls Rachel kept mentioning you seem afraid of. Also if you need a shoulder to cry on just ask me!" Lee then says to Kasumi, "Oh and thank you for making us popcorn." Marie then asks Kasumi, "Umm do you have any plans for today?" Kasumi then tells them, "Well Edna found her older sister's rare DVD copy of "Little Shop of Horrors" with a alternate ending that no one seems to like. Me and my siblings are invited to the showing."

Marie just responds, "Oh ok..." Kasumi then steps out of the trailer and Lee just says to her, "Come again soon!"

Kasumi then continues her trip for berries.

**(Back to Sara and Jimmy)**

As the two follow the tennis ball, they lose their balance and they fall down the hill and they went to fast that they think they hit something on the way down.

Sara and Jimmy get up and it turns out they bumped into three 11 year old girls with blonde hair and braces, they wear pink and black tubetops but one girl wears shorts, another wears pants, and their leader wears a skirt. They have pierced navels and they all smoke cigarettes...

Sara then says to Jimmy, "Oh no... IT'S THEM!" Jimmy then asks, "Is it the three fates?"

Julie Killer then says as she sees the two, "Well, well, well, it's "frog-mouth" and umm uhhh... "Dutch"! We were about to go back to Peach Creek for some "Kanker-bashing" but I find you two here instead, let's have some fun!" Lindsay then catches a fly and before they put it in Sara's mouth, Sara elbows Julie, grabs Jimmy, and make a run for it.

Tara is shocked and says, "No one's ever attacked Julie... not even we can attack Julie!" Julie's then shouts in a fit of rage, "FORGET THE KANKERS... GET THAT BRAT!!!"

Sara and Jimmy ran as fast as they could but then they see a girl in a red hood who grabs them in her arms. As the Killers see the three, Julie walks up to them slowly and says to them, "I don't know who you are but surrender the kids or I'll..."

The girl in the red hood makes a glaring look at Julie that stops her in her tracks and then the other two panic. Lindsay tells Tara, "That girl is making my fists not hit her... let's grab our leader and go!" So Lindsay and Tara grab Julie and they run back to Lemon Brook and never look back.

Sara then looks up at who the strange girl is and then the girl takes her hood off and it turned out to be Kasumi Tendo. Kasumi then asks Sara, "Are you alright? Looks like you encountered the "oni" that "May-chan" mentioned and Hikari carries a picture of just to scare Lee and Marie." Sara nods and then Kasumi then takes Sara and Jimmy back to the neighborhood and Kasumi says to them, "Don't worry little ones, I'll take you to "Ed-kun's" house for snacks while me and my sisters watch a movie... come to think of it maybe you should be with us since you were nearly attacked by those three.

Jimmy then find the lost tennis ball and he asks Kasumi as they go to Edna's house, "Ed's girlfriend, how were you able to scare off the Killer Sisters with your presence?" Kasumi then just smiles and just adds, "I believe my nature must drive them off. "Sara-chan", will you be nicer to your older brother?" Sara then strangly nods and she asks Jimmy, "I have no idea how she does this!"

**NEXT TIME:** Movie time at Edna's... that and a new girl moves to Peach Creek and she is just as odd as Edna and Rachel... but for a reason...


	18. Edna's birthday

**Ed, Edd, Eddy, n Edna**

By Technomaru

Chapter 18: **Edna's Birthday!**

Note: I do not own Ed, Edd, n Eddy...but "The Fourth Ed" and the Kimono Sisters... and brother is mine! Rachel belongs to Squeaken1 though!

the new OC Jennifer belongs to yukimizuno, some parts of "The Aspie Girl" were used by permission in order to properly introduce Jennifer to the four Eds at this time, I have to post this fanfic by today since it does mark the two year anniversary I used Edna in a fanfic. Also Aspergers is real.

This is a spin-off of "The Grim ED-ventures of Ed, Edd, n Eddy". I always wondered what if Edna existed in the "Ed, Edd, n Eddy" canon and...THIS STORY DOES NOT CONTAIN SUPERNATURAL ELEMENTS! except for that one chapter as a parody of "Micheal Jackson's Thriller"... I am still sad about the passing of the king of pop!

I have seen the "Ed, Edd, n Eddy Big Picture show" and Nazz's official last name is "Van Fartenshmeer" so in this story, the Van Fartenshmeers and the Espinozas are closely related!

I realized that August 18th 2007 marks the day I first used Edna. So I decide to mark August 18th as the birthdate for Edna in this fanfic and the Edna in "The Grim ED-ventures of Ed, Edd, n Eddy" So I am doing this chapter at the very last minute.

The Digimon Twin and the Simpsons DVD scenes were inspired by stuff in me and my friend's lives.

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**(A day after the day they watched the rare "Little Shop of Horrors" DVD... I just created a "Noodle Incident" trope... shame on me!)**

May Kanker is walking down the street with a blindfolded Edna as they leave the Starbucks at Downtown Peach Creek. Edna asks May, "Umm May, tell me again why am I blindfolded and walking to my house after I just had a delicious vanilla bean creme' frappuchino?"

May then replies, "Oh you'll see, now finish that "frapp" cuz it's pretty hot in the way Edna what is your favorite anime anyway?" Edna replies, "How long do we have? Ok... first off I like "Ge Ge Ge no Kitaro" and having a boyfriend that resembles Kitaro is pretty kewl but if he resembles the one from "Hakaba Kitaro" then I will be so frightened.

Then I obviously like "Bobobo-bo Bo-bobo" because it's funny and Bo-bobo can do that thing with his nose-hair like what Ed does with his mono-brow. Me and Double D like old school anime like the 60's version of "Ge Ge Ge no Kitaro" and "Gatchaman" back when it was called either "Battle of the Planets" and "G-force"...

**(The front porch of Edna's house, Edna continues her liking for anime)**

... So long story short my main four favorite anime of all time is "One Piece", "Bobobo-bo Bo-bobo", "Ge Ge Ge no Kitaro", and "Digimon: Digital Monsters"... and strangly they are all animated by Toei Animation." May then says, "Wow Edna... you really are a otaku or whatever the heck Ryoko keeps calling "big Ed" when he obsesses with Uzumaki, Death Note, and Hakaba Kitaro." Edna smiles and replies, "Aren't we all otakus? Oh and I also like Pokemon, Ranma 1/2, and Tenchi Muyo... definately Tenchi Muyo!"

May then opens the door as Edna asks, "Umm what's going on?" May takes off Edna's blindfold and she sees her friends as they all shout:

**"HAPPY BIRTHDAY EDNA!"**

Edna is suprised at this she blushes heavily. Nazz then goes up to Edna and says to her, "Hey Edna, I spent all week preparing for your birthday and well you like it?" Edna blushes and replies to her, "No wonder why you haven't been appearing in this fanfic lately, thank you guys so much! Hey wait aren't May's sisters going to crash the party? And what about Kevin? And where's Rolf?"

Double D then goes up to Edna and answers her questions, "Ok I will do them in reverse order... Rolf couldn't make it because of relatives visiting but he stuffed 7 pounds of salami in your fridge, and Rachel gave Kevin and Lee and Marie tickets to the go-kart park her parents work at. She thought of the idea so we wouldn't have to worry about them doing bad stuff, as for the Killers, Kasumi did something to scare them back to Lemon Brook." Kasumi just smiles and serves ice cream to the party go-ers.

Ryoko shows up with the cake as she says to Edna, "We specially prepared this cake for you, to commerate your birthday but since no one ages in this story I guess it's your 12th birthday again... I guess... My head hurts! Oh and Kitaro and Hikari are preparing something special the party very soon!"

Edna sees a cake with a image of herself and the three male Eds. Ed puts his finger on the frosting that is shaped like him and tastes it saying, "I taste me!" Edna pulls out yellow frosting and she says to Ryoko as she decorates the cake with it, "Sorry Ryoko but the cake is missing something!" May sees this and hugs Edna as Edna actually used the frosting to make a image of May on it.

Jimmy lights the candles as everyone sings,

_"Happy Birthday to you! You live in a zoo! You look like a monkey! And you're curious like one too!" _Edna just laughs and then asks, "Now why am I thinking about that movie involving Brendan Fraser and a pervy monkey?"

Sarah says to Edna, "Ok, blow the candles and make a wish!" Edna just concentraits and just blows the candles." Nazz just asks Edna, "Ok dude, what did you wish for?" Edna smirks and replies, "If I said what it was, it wouldn't come true!"

Rachel goes up to Ed, Edd, Eddy, n Edna and says to them, "Umm I kept forgetting to tell you this but me and Nazz met a new friend. She just moved from a distant town called tuscaloosa, her name is Jennifer... umm Jennifer?

The four Eds then meet Jennifer for the first time. She is a girl with medium length, dark chestnut brown hair. She wore a hunter green t-shirt that went to her waistline that had two, white vertical lines on the right side of her shirt. She wore a pair of khakis that went a little past her mid shin and a pair of black and white tennis shoes with white footy socks to put the whole look together.

The girl soon looked up to see the three boys and girl with her dark, chocolate brown eyes that were slightly covered by her thick, oval-shaped glasses. They widened with surprise, "Oh, h-hello," she waved as she looked away in shyness, adjusting her glasses slightly.

Ed points at her as he greets her by telling her, "NEW KID! NEW KID! My name is Ed... HUG ME!"

"T-Thank you Ed…" the girl stuttered, greatly surprised at Ed's burst of strength in shaking her hand/arm. She recoiled her hand and arm a little as she turned her eyes towards the other two.

"… Oh! Err, well; my name is Eddward with two D's, so everyone calls me Double D instead," Double D stated with an all friendly smile. There was a slight pause before Double D gently shoved his elbow into Eddy's side.

"Hey! I'm getting' there Sockhead," Eddy snapped slightly to Double D as he then turned back towards the girl, "The name's Eddy" he continued as he jabbed his right thumb into his chest.

"And my name is Edna! Welcome to the party!" Edna says to Jennifer as she places her arm on her shoulder. Kasumi hands Jennifer a slice of cake as she lowers her head with a bit of shyness as she started to stare down at the ground, "… What do you see on the ground?" Kasumi asked innocently.

"Oh, I-I don't see anything," Jennifer replied to the oldest Kimono Sister as she fidgeted with her thumbs a little, "It's just a bad habit of mine."

Double D then says to Jennifer, Perhaps with the exception of us Eds and Nazz and Rachel, I would like to introduce you to the rest of our friends, Ok these are our girlfriends Ryoko, Kasumi, well my girlfriend Hikari and Edna's boyfriend Kitaro are gone at the moment, Jimmy and Ed's sister Sarah, Johnny 2x4 and Rachel with their friends Plank and Splinter, and this is May Kanker, a very close friend of Edna's as well as mine."

Jennifer then says as May shakes her hand, "I've heard of you and your sisters, but you seem cool, Rachel told me about..." May covers her mouth and says, "Please Jennifer, I don't like being reminded of the Killer Sisters because they more sadistic than Marie, Lee, and Kevin put together." Sarah then adds, "For once I agree with you May." Jennifer then adds, "Actually she told me about what Edna did for you and how you got friends but Edna remains very close." Edna then nods and says, "Yep, just like a sister to me... but Emily moved away a month before I arrived in Peach Creek."

Jennifer just goes outside for some fresh air, that and she is pretty shy to begin with. But then she sees Kevin on his bike and as Ed, Edd, n Eddy go after her while Edna and May are Vanilla bean frappuchino.

Kevin calls out, "Hey Dorks! I heard about how you're getting rid of me and Marie and Lee from attending to the party... and who's the new girl?" Eddy then shouts, "Will ya just make like a tree and get out of here?"

Kevin then says to Eddy, "Psshh, whatever, that party would stink anyway." Kevin stated back as he turned around to rode away, "She's probably gonna end up like you four dorks and May anyway."

Double D turned his attention back to Jennifer after hearing something unusual coming from her; she was crying, "Jennifer? Is there something wrong…?" he questioned as he got the other two Ed's attention.

"… H-He reminded me o-of some people I-I use to be friends with…" Jennifer started to stutter, "T-They started to t-treat me like garbage; a-after I told them I-I had…" she paused for a moment before saying, "I-I have Aspergers."

"Why… That's horrible," Double D stated afterwards as he placed his left hand on her right shoulder, "People should not treat you like that because of that; or anything else, of that matter."

"Uh, translation," Eddy started to ask, "What's As-pa-bur-gers?"

"Bless you, Eddy!" Ed stated with a goofy grin.

"Asperger Syndrome is a form of Autism, which is a brain development disorder; except Apergers is a lighter case of high functioning Autism," Double D explained, "It's very common in boys and rare for a girl to have… Oh, I'm sorry, I-I didn't mean to--"

"I-It's alright," Jennifer replied as she wiped away a few tears, "I couldn't have explained it better myself," she then looked up to the three Ed's, "Aren't we going to continue to celebrate Edna's birthd... Who are you two?"

Hikari and Kitaro show up with some presents and Kitaro then asks Jennifer, "Are you new around this area? Also where did the birthday girl go?" Hikari then adds, "Not only that but the other guests are gone too..." Kasumi walks up to the three Eds and says to Ed, "Oh my... the guests heard what was going outside and they appear to be armed with pitchforks (The male Ed and Jenny don't respond), torches (The male Ed and Jenny don't respond), and a board with a nail on it (The male Ed and Jenny eyes are wide open and they drop their jaws in panic).

Before they can do anything, the guests return and Ryoko and Edna show up with a rather beaten up Kevin in their arms. Double D then shouts, "GOOD LORD! WHAT HAPPENED?" Edna pulls out a board and nail on it and says, "This happened, now what are you going to say to Jennifer?" Kevin shivers and says, "Jennifer... I apologize...I shouldn't have treated you and the Eds like that." Ryoko pokes Kevin in the butt with her pitchfork and says to him, "Aaaand?" Kevin then shakes his head until Ryoko pokes his butt again and he says, "Oh ok... and I have a tiny dork." Jennifer just giggles and Eddy joins her while Double D then says, "Oh come on! I thought we dropped that lowbrow theory about why Kevin is obsessed with the word "dork" a few chapters ago!"

Ryoko and Edna then drop Kevin and Edna then says, "Ok you! Now that you learned not to make fun of people for their flaws I can give you two options... either run away with your tail behind your legs or join my party since I'm that forgiving and I think you've had enough."

Kevin then gets up and says, "I think I should stick around for the party." Edna then says, "Fine with me but since you're mean to Jenny your cake has no flower on it and you get sprinkles on your ice cream!" Kevin then says, "I think I liked it better when Ryoko poked my butt with a pitchfork!"

May then gives Jennifer a slice of cake with a huge flower on it and tells her, "This was a piece Edna wanted but she thinks you should have it." Jenny just smiles. Kitaro then shows up and says to Edna, "Hello my love! I gathered all the presents we got for you!"

Ed got her "Coraline" on DVD, Double D got her a "Sextant" and it made Ed and Eddy laugh so hard. Eddy got her a cherry jawbreaker he was saving for himself, The 4 Kimonos got her 100 dollars and a tickets to a sushi restaurant and hot springs with Kitaro, Nazz got her a new pair of confortable shoes used for sports and other physical activity and a super special deluxe Micheal Jackson CD, Sarah, Jimmy, and Kitaro got her a Japanese tea set and a Simpsons 8th season DVD box set, and Johnny and Rachel had no idea what to get Edna for her birthday. Edna just tells them, "Don't worry guys, just seeing you here is what's more important than a birthday gift... you too Jennifer!" Ed then comments, "Wow, she isn't as greedy as Eddy." Eddy then says, "Yeah, she isn't as greedy as...HEY!"

Edna then says to everyone, "Thank you very much everyone... but it looks like I didn't get a gift from May." May shows up with two packages while telling her, "Oh no?" Edna then opens a package and May tell her, "We got matching pajamas made to resembles the ones seen in that "weird monkey movie"." Edna opens the other and is getting giggly for she got... a Digimon Twin, a Digimon virtual pet that has two in one package!" Edna then says in a shocked way, "Oh May... I always wanted one... how did you know? Now I can get one and you can get one and we can fight and do communication event to get special items." May then tells her, "Oh I've seen your collection, Hikari is a big a fan as you, Kitaro has access to ordering stuff online and I heard Nazz is a fan of that anime too!"

Nazz looks suprised and she says, "Nuh-uh... I'm no fan of anime!" The Eds stares blankly at her and then Edna then gives Nazz a glaring look and says, "Cousin Nazz, this Charade has gone far enough...We're gonna have to let everyone find out once and for all!" So everyone but the Kimonos drag Nazz to her house and she is kicking and screaming along the way.

They see that her room is decorated with girly stuff and cheerleading gear but then Ed notices a Nico Robin bobble-head and when she presses it, a huge collection of ONE PIECE stuff appears and a full library of "Shonen Jump" magazines appear. Ed then says, "Cool!" Double D replies, "But Nazz, girls of your status aren't really into Anime and Manga...but you got a collection that is bigger than TWO anime conventions!" Nazz then says, "Please don't tell anyone or else I'll be in trouble with my peers!" Edna then says, "Relax Cousin Nazz, everyone here likes anime and manga and I've very popular, especially with the fans, besides, likes and dislikes make us unique and different and if anyone doesn't like it then they can just go watch "Monster Rancher"!"

Nazz hugs Edna and says, "Oh thank you, you are truely a great cousin and a best friend anyone can have...and the Eds are greatful to have you as a "fourth Ed". Kevin, who is carried around by Ed then says, "You like anime? What did I see in you?" Edna then glares at Kevin tell him, "Hey, just be glad we got you off easy after you were being a "jerkass" to Jennifer." Kevin replies, "I'm sorry Edna...I'LLBEGOOD!" Nazz then says, "Speaking of "jerkass" let's get back to your house, Let's watch your Simpsons DVD.

After being back at Edna's house to continue the party they were watching the episode "In Marge we Trust" The Kimono Siblings really like the episode.

**(Later that night, Edna hosts a sleepover with the male Eds and May since everyone else is busy)**

Ed is watching one of Edna's Ge Ge Ge no Kitaro and comments, "Kitaro looks like Edna's boyfriend!" Double D comments, "I think that's what the author's intention was. Edna and May show up in strange black and white paterned pajamas with matching nightcaps.

Ed shivers and says, "Oh no, are me in Downtown and attending Hypnos' pajama party?" Edna then says, "No, me and May are just wearing the pajamas, I like the pattern and I did like that Brendan Fraiser movie." Eddy then comments, "Reminds me of a bad dream I had involving me and you two and we're in the same pajamas." Edna then says, "Oh and boys... May... this is the best birthday I ever had!"

Then they hear a knock at the door and they see Jennifer dressed same similar pajamas as May and Edna and carrying a backpack. Jennifer then asks Edna, "Umm can I join you guys? I brought a movie!" Jennifer pulls out a DVD of "Monkeybone". Edna smiles and says, "ABSOLUTELY! Oh and glad you became our friend, also if anyone else makes fun of you they would have to deal with "Punchy McGee" and "Fisty O'Flanagan"." Edna says this while exposing her clenched fists.

Jennifer just smiles and giggles as she joins the Edna's sleepover.

**NEXT TIME: A parody of a 80's movie no one might remember!**

**TIME FOR DRABBLES!**

A blue lizard like puppet named Clarance (the one from "Wonder Showzen") shows up and says, "Hey readers... wanna see a movie! I interview a "Mary Sue"!"

**(MOVIE BEGINS)**

**Clarence:** Hi I'm Clarence, and today, I'm going to meet a fanfiction original character who is totally a mary sue... hi are you a mary sue?

**Edna:** No my name is Edna... now go away.

**Clarence:** but other people think you're a mary sue... are you a mary sue?

**Edna:** No, why do people thing I'm a mary sue... I am afraid of clowns, I'm not what you call "attractive", and I do good things for the Eds because they made me a Ed and they deserve good stuff to happen to them.

**Clarence:** are you a mary sue?

**Edna:** No I am not and get that camera off my face!

**Clarence:** But the fans insist I have you answer my question, just one question. Are you a mary sue?

**Edna:** Hey I remember who you are, you're Clarence from "Wonder Showzen", I'm on to you! Get away! Get that camera away from my face! Also your show is disturbing yet funny!

**(BREAKING NEWS)**

**A.P. Gibralter:** Breaking news at this hour... you have just witnessed a crossover with MTV2 "Wonder Showzen"! And now a song parody.

**(May Kanker sings a song about her best friend, sung to the tune of "Lucky" by Britney Spears)**

This is the story about a girl named Edna.

Early morning  
She wakes up  
Knock, knock, knock on the door

It's her Cousin Nazz  
and her friends  
It's her they're all waiting for

Isn't she lovely  
This fourth Ed girl

(scene of them flying on the Eds' custom made airplane)

And they say..  
She's so Lucky  
She's a Ed  
And she flies flies flies with her three new friends  
Thinking, if there's something missing in her life  
Then did those three friends fill the void?

(scene of Edna first meeting May Kanker)

Made a new friend, it's not a dream  
But there's someone for her to cheer up  
And the girl is a Kanker and not a crank yanker  
But tell me, what happens when it works

Baby

Isn't she lovely?  
This fourth Ed girl

(scene of them swimming in the Kimono Sisters' pool)

And they say..  
She's so Lucky  
She's a Ed  
And she swims swims swims with her FOUR new friends  
Thinking, if there's something missing in her life  
Then did those four friends fill the void?

(A montage shows flashbacks of certain chapters of "Ed, Edd, Eddy n Edna" such as the time the Killer Sisters invading the Cul-De-Sac. Then May Kanker is sitting on the moon and sprinkles dust to the ground.)

Isn't she lovely?  
This fourth Ed girl

She's soo lucky  
But why does she cry?  
If there is nothing missing in her life  
Why do tears come at night?

Edna: those are tears of happiness, don't assume that!

(scene of the four Eds and May running to the candy store)

And they say..  
She's so Lucky  
She's a Ed  
And she runs runs runs with her FOUR new friends  
Thinking, if there's something missing in her life  
Then did those four friends fill the void?

(scene of the four Eds and May flying on nimbus clouds)

She's so lucky.  
But she flies flies flies with her FOUR new friends  
Thinking, if there's something missing in her life  
Then did those four friends fill the void?


	19. Weird Science Party

**Ed, Edd, Eddy, n Edna**

By Technomaru

Chapter 19: Weird Science Party!

Note: I do not own Ed, Edd, n Eddy...but "The Fourth Ed" and the Kimono Sisters... and brother is mine! Rachel belongs to Squeaken1 though and the new OC Jennifer belongs to yukimizuno.

This is a spin-off of "The Grim ED-ventures of Ed, Edd, n Eddy". I always wondered what if Edna existed in the "Ed, Edd, n Eddy" canon and...THIS STORY DOES NOT CONTAIN SUPERNATURAL ELEMENTS! except for that one chapter as a parody of "Micheal Jackson's Thriller"... I am still sad about the passing of the king of pop!

I have seen the "Ed, Edd, n Eddy Big Picture show" and Nazz's official last name is "Van Fartenshmeer" so in this story, the Van Fartenshmeers and the Espinozas are closely related!  
Today is my birthday party and I decided to make the short story a stand alone chapter to parody one of the late John Hughes's greatest 80's movies of all time...

**{The following dream sequence was made in memory of John Hughes}**

**(Edna has a very WEIRD dream that takes place in Shermer Illinois... in the name of SCIENCE)**

Ed, Edd, n Eddy are just being relaxing in Double D's house while Ed watches "Bride of Frankenstein". Eddy then watches the movie and says, "I have a idea... hey Sockhead, Since Nazz doesn't want us and we don't want the Kankers, let's use your computer to create "the perfect woman"!"

Double D just rolls his eyes and says, "You know Eddy that is the most surreal thing I've ever heard like the time Ed says a Leprechan tells him to do bad things!" Ed replies, "Oh c'mon Double D! He is real! He told me to start fires!"

Eddy then replies, "Cut the comedy Ed, I'm sure this will work Sockhead! I saw this work in a John Hughes movie, now all we need are your computer and some tools and other stuff..." Ed then says to Double D, "This reminds me of the Japanese comic "A.I. Love You" Double D replies, "You read that?" Ed replies, "I was recommended to read it after I read "Negima". Double D then thinks to himself, "I'd sure hate to see what Ed would be like after reading Love Hina but I can guess what Eddy's reaction to that manga is... he's would want to be the manager of the Hinata inn."

**(Soon)**

Double D then says as he starts the program, "The computer's power can only grants the simulation with the intellect of a fifth grader, now what Eddy? (Eddy whispers to Double D) WWWHHHAAATTT?!? You want me to do that? Well since you do have a coupon for all of my santitary needs I guess not, besides no one would suspect a 12 year old boy to do such a thing!"

Double D hacks into a government mainframe in order to obtain power for a more advanced version of the experiment. Double D uploaded photos of Ugly Betty to form the simulation's body, a photo of Double D to form her intellect, and Nami from "One Piece" to form her attitude. Before it was scanned, Ed drew a beautymark under Ugly Betty's left eye.

Eddy asks, "What gives Double D? Why does she look like Ugly Betty, is intelligent as you, and has the additude of Nami from "One Piece"... I wanted a hot chick that resembles Kelly Lebrock... or Vanessa Angel!" Double D then says, "Oh please Eddy, we're only 12... so we're going to make the girl 12 years old like us as well!" Eddy then says, "Well you're no fun!"

Double D then says to his friends, "How about we give her a name?" Ed looks at the name of his computer the "Apple Lisa" and he says, "How about "Lisa"?" Double D replies, "Well that name's taken... how about since our names have the name "Ed" in it, I say we should make her a Ed too... and I know one female equivelant to the name... "**EDNA**"! Also it's a acronym for "**E**d **D**eoxyribo **N**ucleic **A**cid" Eddy then says, "Yeah, whatever Sockhead, as long as we don't call it late for dinner!"

The other two Eds agree with it. Then the three are wearing bras on their heads while Ed chants, "OINGO BOINGO! OINGO BOINGO! OINGO BOINGO! OINGO BOINGO!" Double D is very confused by Ed's actions and so he asks Ed, "Ed?... By the way, why are we wearing bras on our heads?" and Ed replies, "Ceremonial." Eddy then asks gleefully, "Hey Lumpy, where did you get the bras?" Ed replies, "THOSE ARE MY MOM'S!" Eddy shivers in disgust and he says, "After we perform this dumb experiment, I'm going to take a shower... a nice... long...hot....shower!"

Then Double D performs the final step... he presses the "ENTER" key and when the song "Weird Science" by "Oingo Boingo" plays in the background, strange stuff happens like it shows in the living room such as Sarah being shot out of a chimney, Toonami is back on the air, monkeys were flying out of Ed's butt, Eddy's wallet is flowing with cash but they transform into leaves, a nuclear warhead emerges from the floor, a Moose head's antlers droop down, and three Vanilla Bean Frappuchinos magically appear before the guys.

Then Ed, Edd, n Eddy see the bathroom door exploding into pieces being surrounded by red fog and out emerged a 12 year old hispanic girl their age sporting thick-framed eyeglasses a prominent set of braces, a beautymark under her left eye, having long black hair and she's wearing a blue shirt with a red dress and sandals.

The male Eds cannot believe what they are seeing... their experiment worked! Then the girl named "Edna" smiles and asks them, "So... what would you little maniacs like to do first?"

Outside of the house, Jay and Silent Bob shows up from their town of New Jersey and Jay says to Silent Bob in his most G-rated away, "Yo check it out Lunchbox! Shermer, Illinois really did exist after all... Snootch to the Nootch!" "Silent" Bob just says "word!"

**(Edna wakes up from her WEIRD dream about SCIENCE)**

Edna then thinks to herself, "Man what a weird dream... I mean I dreamed those three created me as if I was a Fanfiction OC or something... well time for breakfast with the **BREAKFAST CLUB** and to bake a cake with **SIXTEEN CANDLES** on it for the author's birthday even though he is older than 16... and I'm **PRETTY IN PINK**!"

Meanwhile May is watching tv and it shows the "clear eyes guy" on TV constantly saying, "**Bueller**? ...**Bueller**? ...**Bueller**?"

As she is outside her house, Edna sees a explosion and then she runs to it and finds out it came from Double D's house. She sees a blown-up computer and the three male Eds wearing bras on their heads. Edna then says to them, "Guys! Just because it happened in a John Hughes movie, doesn't mean it works here... also why would you want to create a woman for? You have the Kimono Sisters!"

Ed then says, "We wanted to end the chapter with a weird twist!" Eddy then says as the bra on his head slips off, "Oh Shut up Ed!" Then a Leprechan appears on Ed's shoulder and he says to him, "Ok me boyo'... when Eddy's not looking... BURN HIS HOUSE DOWN!" Ed just grins and nods.

**THE END**

**next time: **Ed and Eddy have to take care of May Kanker while Edna and Nazz attend the Espinoza/ Van Fartenshmeer family reunion and Double D and the Kimonos go to a meeting.


	20. Ed, Eddy, n MAY?

**Ed, Edd, Eddy, n Edna**

By Technomaru

Chapter 20: Ed, Eddy, n MAY?!?

Note: I do not own Ed, Edd, n Eddy...but "The Fourth Ed" and the Kimono Sisters... and brother is mine! Rachel belongs to Squeaken1 though and the new OC Jennifer belongs to yukimizuno.

This is a spin-off of "The Grim ED-ventures of Ed, Edd, n Eddy". I always wondered what if Edna existed in the "Ed, Edd, n Eddy" canon and...THIS STORY DOES NOT CONTAIN SUPERNATURAL ELEMENTS! except for that one chapter as a parody of "Micheal Jackson's Thriller"... I am still sad about the passing of the king of pop!

I have seen the "Ed, Edd, n Eddy Big Picture show" and Nazz's official last name is "Van Fartenshmeer" so in this story, the Van Fartenshmeers and the Espinozas are closely related! This chapter explores more about Edna's past and why Nazz was fat in the past.

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

After waking up in the last chapter to a WEIRD dream about SCIENCE... plus it parodies the movie "Weird Science", Edna gets really as she and her parents are going to pick up Nazz to attend the Van Fartenshmeer/Espinoza family reunion.

**(The Cul-De-Sac)**

Eddy is running a scam where he sets up a "Psychiatric Booth" that reads, "The three doctors are IN" Double D is nervous as he tells Eddy, "Umm Eddy, now that we have girlfriends, they don't want us to scam anymore because they are rich it makes us and them look bad... and why this scam? We're going to get sued!"

Eddy then says, "Yeah right, like they're going to sue us for peanuts, the kids in the Cul-de-sac have problems and we know it! Such as Kevin talking about dorks, Johnny has a thing for nuts and by nuts I mean donuts and acorns, Sarah being a psycho, and Nazz was a minor background character in season 1 and all she ever did was laugh."

Edna and Nazz just so happen to be standing there when Eddy just said that and Nazz isn't too happy. Eddy then says, "Oh ok... I'm sorry I brought up Kevin's dork obsession." Nazz then says, "Wrong answer!" And as she noogies him till one of his three hairs came off she continues, "The reason why I hardly did anything in season 1 was because I was considered "eye candy" to guys, it wasn't until the second season I did more stuff... so don't point that fact out again!"

As Eddy puts his third hair back on his head, "Double D then says, "Oh my Nazz, I had no idea you're pretty sensitive about that fact, sorry about that!" Edna then says, "We accept your apology. Anyway you better take down that stand before Ryoko or the Charles M. Schultz estate sees you, oh and we're here to tell you that me and Nazz will be attending the Van Fartenshmeer/Espinoza family reunion.

Ed then gleefuly asks, "Ooh! Ooh! Are we invited?" Edna then says, "Sorry Ed but only those in the Van Fartenshmeer and Espinoza can attend such as myself, Cousin Nazz, my mother Marian who is Nazz's aunt, and my father Ricardo. Anyway we're here to let you guys take care of May, she will be very lonely without me and since I trust you three male Eds, I'm sure you'll do fine!"

Eddy is shocked while Ed and Double D are delighted. May then walks up to the three Eds and as she notices the booth she asks them, "Does the Charles M. Schultz estate know about this?" Eddy then says, "C'mon Edna! You know Eds and Kankers aren't supposed to get along." Edna then appears to be angry and says to him, "Eddy! How many times do I have to tell you? Yes we can if it give it time! May is kewl and other than you three she is my best friend, and she saved your life... why are you still like this?" Eddy replies, "I dunno, she gives me this weird vibe I mean after years of dealing with Kankers, I just sorta feel weird about them. May then says to Double D, Ed, and Nazz, "Look what I can do!" Then she does a weird dance while the three laugh at the Stewart from "Mad TV" imitation.

Ed then says, "Don't worry Edna, I promise to keep May in good hands!" May then hugs Ed and she comments, "Man you smell better now that Kasumi got you to bathe." Edna the says, "We're not leaving now, we have some time before we go.... so... you wanna ask me anything?" Double D then says to her, "How silly of me, we never asked you where former residence was at. I mean where did you live before moving to the Cul-De-Sac?"

Edna then replies, "Wow, it took you guys that long to ask huh? well ok... I come from a town called "Jefferton"... and no it's not that one town also called "Jefferton" that is governed by a idiot mayor." Double D then says, "Intreguing, so it's not the town that was once said to have it's theme park "Pioneer Island" rebuilt... and then recreated the fire that destroyed it in the first place, then the fire spreaded in the town?" Ed then replies, "Yeah that one... I mean there are more than 1 town with the same name... like Springfield. Anyway, just like that other town, my Jefferton also has a "Gulliver's Buffet" and it's a nightmare when me and Nazz att...." Edna's mouth is covered by Nazz who says, "I think we should go."

Ed then says, "Oh C'mon Nazz, we want to hear the rest!" Nazz replies, "Noooo! You guys shouldn't hear it." Edna then takes Nazz's hand out of her face and says, "Nazz, this is the sort of thing they should hear, plus it would discourage them from going to buffets, especially Gulliver's." Nazz just gives up and Edna continues, "Yeah, We used to go to Gulliver's Buffet whenever Cousin Nazz visits, she became addicted to the food in that buffet and it made her fat, fortunately she lost all of it somehow. I pity the town who has a Gulliver's Buffet in it."

**(And now you know why Nazz was fat in the Ed, Edd, n Eddy episode "Every which way but Ed")**

Edna continues, "Well anyway, now that you know where I came from, mom is going to give us a ride to the reunion, so please take good care of May... and if you're good to May I'll give you a suprise and if you're bad then....umm... I haven't thought of it yet... but you get the message! Ciao boys!"

As Edna and Nazz got a ride from Nazz's unseen Aunt Marian who just so happens to be Edna's mother, May Kanker is now stuck with the Eds. May Kanker then asks Double D, "Umm... does Eddy get along with Edna?" Double D then rolls his eyes and doesn't say a thing because he doesn't know either.

Eddy then says, "Well now what do we do now that May is with us?" Double D then says, "Umm... perhaps we should just enjoy this nice hot summer day and study insects..." Ed then interrupts and says, "And train beetles to fight eachother like Ryoko taught me!" Double D then says, "You know, despite the fact that sort of thing is barbaric, it's very intreguing and better than scamming!" May Kanker then says, "Hey Eddy, wanna join us in watching the beetles?" Eddy then pouts a bit.

Soon, Ed, Edd, Eddy, n May then see the Kimono Sisters and brother go up to them and Hikari says to them, "Hello guys!" Eddy then says, "Say Hikari how about us and your sisters go on a date while Kitaro watches May for Edna, what do ya say?" Hikari then replies, "Actually Eddy, Kitaro, Ryoko, Kasumi, and myself are going to a social party and a meeting to prevent bringing the Gulliver's buffet franchise to Peach Creek. So we're taking "Sock-hat-kun" with us to back us up!" Double D then says, "Edna mentioned that buffet and what it did to Nazz. We have to stop it!"

Ryoko then replies, "Sorry Eddy but maybe next time, but until then... Ed, May, keep my man out of trouble!" Ed and May just nod.

Eddy is shocked and he sees May just standing there looking confused and says, "Yeah... the Kimonos didn't want you to scam because not only is that sort of thing embarassing but it makes them and yourself look really really really bad... so drop that "pig in a poke" mister!" Eddy then says, "Aww shi... umm I mean... Oh horse apples!" And as he drops a pillow case, a cat jumps out and slashes his face then hisses at him.

**(Soon)**

Eddy sets up a scam for his devil fruit scam. Ed then asks, "Umm Eddy, didn't we do this scam in this before?" Eddy replies, "No we didn't Lumpy." Ed then replies, "Umm I think we did on the day we met Edna, and you used the money to buy that fake tape "Sexy Sirens of Sci-Fi and Horror Revealed! Volume 4" Eddy shivers and says, "Please don't remind me... That's how we met Edna!" May replies, "You really need to get your mind out of the gutter mister!"

As Ed and Eddy go through the scam, May Kanker pulls out a sign that reads, "_Don't fall for it, it's a scam!_" Eddy notices the kids are walking by and then he sees May with the sign and he shouts, "WHY YOU! I AUGHTA..." Ed restrains Eddy and May says to him, "I know you hate me for ruining your scams and being a Kanker but the Kimonos feel that you shouldn't scam anymore, so therefore Edna gave up scamming and so should you!"

Eddy calms down and he asks May, "Umm do you know where Jenny and Rachel went?" May replies, "Down at Jenny's house cross-stiching." Eddy then says, "Oh that's great, so now what can me, you, and Lumpy do that doesn't involve scamming?"

**(Soon)**

Eddy finds himself watching "Hoarders" with Ed and May at his house. May then says, "I wonder when will they ever show Uncle **(CAN'T PRINT THIS IN A FANFIC)'**s house, it's trashier than our trailer." Ed then asks May, "You kiss your mama with that mouth?" May replies, "What? That's really the name of my mom's brother!"

Eddy then has a devious idea. He says to May, "I have a idea, let's play a game. You like to pretend to be a princess?" May then smiles delightfully and then Eddy says, "Ok, let's play "Egyptian Princess 3000" and since it takes place in the future Ed would love it. Yes you are a beautiful princess but oh no... you were bitten by a poisonous space asp, since this is the future you have to be mummified by being wrapped up in this futuristic tin foil... better than toilet paper."

May just plays along while Ed wraps her up. Eddy continues, "And now we place the mummified space princess to the top of the tower so that her beauty will be admired throught the galaxy... it's your cue stupid!" Ed then says, "Skip to my loo my darling!" As he climbs up and places May on top of the roof. May is confused over what is going on but makes the best out of being "a princess"

When Ed got to the house, he noticed Eddy is very excited as he is watching a certain channel that is pirated... "The Naughty Boy channel". The announcer then says in a sexy sultry voice,

_"Up next on the Naughty Boy Channel is "Wild Monkey Dance"... and then it's Ashley Ketchem and Misty Waters starring in "Poke-a-man"... This is the Naughty Boy Channel and boy are you naughty!"_

Eddy then says, "At last! A scam that works really well! And I get to see the goods!" Ed then asks, "Umm Eddy, how did you get access to that channel that Ryoko said would skin you alive if she caught you watching that?" Eddy then says "Umm... so what? Have a seat!"

Ed then thinks for 20 minutes and then notices it's raining and lighting is striking and then Ed says to Eddy in a angry tone, "I know what you're up to mister! You wrapped up May in tin-foil and used her in a scam to get that channel for free!"

Eddy then watches a movie that makes monkey sounds but I cannot describe what is going on. Eddy then says, "So... it took you that long to find out! Oh no it's raining and thunder outside... it might ruin the reception. Ed appears to be angered and then he leaves the house.

Ed then sees a shivering May, still covered in tin foil and worried about being struck by lightning. Ed then grabs May as she sighed and then unwraps her as he gently puts her in a room. Eddy then says, "HEY! I WANNA SEE MORE ACTION... oh hi lumpy... uh oh..." Eddy is grabed by Ed as he kicks and screams in agony and throws him in the same room with May. He swallow the keys and says, "You're not leaving until you get along with May and apologize to her!" Then he proceeds to read his new issue of "Creepshow".

Eddy seems to be very nervous. May then asks, "Why do you do stuff like this?" Eddy couldn't answer. May then says, "Look, if it makes you feel like a macho man, here's five bucks... now go buy a dirty movie!" Eddy then looks at her hand with a 5 dollar bill in it. Eddy then shivers as he feels something burning into his very soul... and the he says... "Yo...yo...you keep it!"

May then says in disbelief, "Huh? Did something crazy fly out of your mouth and into ear? You refuse money?" Eddy then says, "Yeah... I dunno what posessed me to do such a thing to you... I'm sorry and I'll never do it again, it's just that I never forget the pain you and your sisters caused to me and my friends, the fact that you used to stalk Lumpy, and then I noticed that you Edna seems to hang out with you alot rather than us... then again she invites Ed and Double D to whatever you have planned... look I just have this vibe I feel whenever I'm around you and it's causing me to be a... (tears in eyes and shouts) DEE-DEE-DEE! THERE! I SAID IT! I'M A DEE-DEE-DEE!"

May then raises her hand... and puts it over Eddy's shoulder as she says, "At least you admit your faults and you seem awfully sorry about the way you treat me, I should forgive you but under one condition... please be my friend..." Eddy looks at May and Eddy then shrugs and says, "Well you did save my life, you are friendly to Sock-head, Lumpy, the Fourth Ed and our girlfriends, and I'm locked in this room with you so... why not?"

May then giggles as she hugs Eddy. Eddy then says to May, "At least the pain in my soul stopped... maybe it was heartburn after eating one of Edna's microwave burritos." May then replies, "Yep... they would do it... I know where Edna's family keeps the cards, wanna play?" Eddy then says, "Well I have nothing better else to do....

**(Later that night)**

Edna, Double D, the Kimono Sisters and brother arrive at the house. Edna then says as she sees Ed, "Hey Ed! The reunion was a blast! So I dropped Nazz off at the house while I came with Kitaro and his sisters to see you, Eddy, and pick up May. Double D then says to Hikari, "Well I feel relieved that we got "Gullivers Buffet" to not be built in Downtown Peach Creek, so now there won't be any kids in the cul-de-sac to make porkers out of themselves!" Hikari nods in agreement and then she wraps her arms around Double D and they kiss eachother.

Kitaro then does the same to Edna as she sighs and giggles. Ryoko then asks Ed, "Hey Ed, have you seen my man and May Kanker? And was he behaving?" Ed then says, "I'm getting Eddy and May to kiss and make up by locking them in the room until they get along and I swallowed the key! (Ryoko is angry) Umm I mean by "kiss and make up" I mean make up their differences and be friends!" Ryoko smiles and says, "That's better... (frowns) but you still locked them in.... umm... Edna what room did Ed put Eddy and May in?"

Edna then says, "Oh that's the game room, my family happens to have decks of playing cards in there an..." Ryoko is shocked and says in sheer horror, "If those two are locked in that room... alone... with decks of cards... WE GOT TO GET THEM OUT OF HERE.... KITARO HELP ME!"

As Kitaro and Ryoko try to get the door open, Edna pulls out a bottle of Kaopectate and says, "If you want Eddy and May out of there, you need to drink up!" Double D then says to Edna, "Don't worry, I summoned the local locksmith!"

Then Rolf shows up and says, "Oh ho... hello there "sock-hat ed-boy", "no brain ed-boy", Edna, "three japanese girls and boy I never met before". I see that "nice Kanker" and "three hair ed boy" are locked in that room!" Without hesitating, Rolf studies the key-hole and pulls out earwax and molds it into a key. He opens it successfully. He walks out and says, "Thank you very much!"

To the suprise of Ed, Edd, n Edna and the Kimonos... They see Eddy and May playing cards all right... Eddy asks May, "Do you have any 6's?" May replies, "Go fish!" Edna then says, "I don't believe it... he's getting along with May!" Ryoko also says, "I don't believe it either... he's playing "go fish" instead of Poker, Blackjack, and 21"

May then says, "Well that fun, time to hit the hay... oh hi Edna... did you meet my new friend?" She says this while hugging Eddy. Edna then says, "Well well well... looks like you made my best friend other than you guys happy... (Edna hands Eddy a huge grape jawbreaker) It's yours! take it!"

Eddy then takes it and slurps on it happily. Ryoko then says, "That aughta keep him from scamming for a while... let's go home! See ya tomorrow cutie!"

May then tells Eddy, "Don't worry, I won't tell anyone about the tin foil thing and neither will Ed... my friend!" Eddy then smiles but then Ryoko can be heard saying, "Hey, I wonder if Eddy remembered to TIVO "Ace of Cakes" on the Food Network." Ryoko turns on the TV and due to the tin foil accidentally placed on the antenna, Ryoko turns on the TV and sees the last few minutes of "Wild Monkey Dance".

Ryoko is shocked and shouts, "EEEEDDDDDDDDYYYY!"

May then looks at very nervous Eddy and says, "OOOOooooh Busted!"

**NEXT TIME:** Edna becomes obsessed with Professional Wrestling ya jabronis!!!


	21. Wrestlemania XXXIII 13

**Ed, Edd, Eddy, n Edna**

By Technomaru

Chapter 21: Wrestlemania XXXIII 1/3

Triple E vs The Masked Mumbler

Note: I do not own Ed, Edd, n Eddy...but "The Fourth Ed" and the Kimono Sisters... and brother is mine! Rachel belongs to Squeaken1 though and the new OC Jennifer belongs to yukimizuno.

This is a spin-off of "The Grim ED-ventures of Ed, Edd, n Eddy". I always wondered what if Edna existed in the "Ed, Edd, n Eddy" canon and...THIS STORY DOES NOT CONTAIN SUPERNATURAL ELEMENTS! except for that one chapter as a parody of "Micheal Jackson's Thriller"... I am still sad about the passing of the king of pop!

I have seen the "Ed, Edd, n Eddy Big Picture show" and Nazz's official last name is "Van Fartenshmeer" so in this story, the Van Fartenshmeers and the Espinozas are closely related!

Yes I am aware of the passing of Patrick Swayze and Yoshito Usui (creator of Crayon Shinchan) :'(

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One day, Ed, Edd, n Eddy are soon invited over to Edna's as her parents ordered "WWE Summerslam". Double D then says, "How exciting, Professional Wrestling, a cross between Showmanship and sportsmanship!" Eddy then says, "... You know I was about to make a joke about female mud wrestling but you guys would tell me to get my mind out of the gutter so yeah, I'm seeing this coming.

As they open the door, they see a table full of snacks, 5 boxes of pizzas, and tortilla chips with salsa and guacamole. Then they see Edna in blue shorts and a "WWE" shirt as she says to the Eds, "Hi guys! I got the snacks ready, but are you ready to rumble?" Double D answers meekly, "Umm... yes?"

May Kanker then shows up in blue jeans and in a John Cena shirt. She hands the Eds a slice of pizza and says to them, "Oh Edna gave this to me, I really need to get a new wardrobe since my old wardrobe is back in the trailer... and they never were properly washed.

Edna then tells her, "That's right May, I did say I wanted you to have a better life... even the Eds are part of it... isn't that right Eddy?" Eddy then carefully swallows his pizza, remembering last time he choked on it, he replies to Edna, "Yeah, looks like she has changed for the best ever since she became my friend... now if only her other two sisters were nice to us, they can't always be nice to us only when the Killer Sisters enter the Cul-De-Sac."

The countdown on TV then announces that Summerslam just started. Edna then shouts, "OK YA JABRONIS! ARE YOU READY FOR HARD CORE ACTION! THEN KNOW YOU ROLE AND SHUT YOUR MOUTH!"

Edna is so excited at this as Eddy and Ed watch on. May gets Double D some milk and asks, "What's the matter Double D, you like wrestling?" Double D replies, "Actually I do... but has Edna always act like this when WWE is on TV?" May replies, "Yes she does... I just don't get what is it with her and Wrestling, plus everytime they say their tired old catchphrase they act like a hamster who just got a food pellet." Edna hears Hulk Hogan shout, "AND BROTHER WHAT ARE YA GONNA DO? WHEN HULKAMANIA GETS WILD ON YOU?" And Edna squeals and eats a pretzel like a hamster.

During Summerslam Edna is just hyped up on the action but she hides behind the chair when she sees returning wrestler Doink the Clown appear in the ring and get defeated by Randy Orton. Then the next match has John Cena wrestle against Carlito. Edna then shouts, "GO GET HIM JOHN CENA! SEND THAT ROOTY-POO CANDY BUTT JABRONI BACK TO THE APPLE ORCHARD!"

Then the whole thing ends and Edna then says, "Well that was fun... just wait till next year... or until "Raw", "Smackdown", or the next Wrestlemania event." Edna then goes to her room and stays there for some quite bit. Eddy then asks May, "Say May... what did you say was the Gym class that Edna attended back in Jefferton (no not that one) Junior High?" May then replies, "Wrestling!"

Then Edna shows up in a purple wrestling costume and in place of her glasses it's a mask, Double D notices that her costume looks very similar to his wrestling costume as "the masked mumbler". Edna then says, "Just call me "Triple E"... just like "Triple H"... well ok I made up "Triple E" after my initials **E**dna **E**smeralda **E**spinoza as Triple H is after his name **H**unter **H**earst **H**elmsly**...** so... ok, which one of you Jabronis wants to lay the smackdown on me?"

Ed then replies in a enthusiasticly way, "Do you smell what I'm cookin'?" And sure enough Edna performs the infamous "Kinniku Buster" (aka Muscle Buster or the Butt Buster) on Ed and as Ed yells out "UNCLE! UNCLE!" Edna lets go of him and says, "Hey at least I didn't perform the "half nelson" or the "camel clutch" on ya."

Double D then says to May and Eddy, "Oh dear, I hope we somehow can deal with Edna's case of how you say "Wrestlemania"."

Eddy then gets a idea. He tells the others, "How about we start our own Wrestling federation and have the kids pay to see our matches and before you tell Ryoko then I should point out that it shouldn't count as a scam since Vince McMahon does that sort of thing too!"

Edna then says, "Good point! I guess I'll make my costume." Eddy then replies, "And it looks like "The Masked Mumbler" will be out of retirement today!

**(Later on)**

The Eds (and May) has made a wrestling ring in the middle of the Cul-De-Sac and a banner that reads:

"**E-I-E-I-O WF WRESTLING** (**E**d **I**s **E**ntertaining **I**n **O**rganized **W**resling **F**ederation): **Not a scam**!"

Eddy has the "scam" ready... but Ryoko is behind him and she scold him, saying, "EDDY! I thought I told you... no more scamming!" Eddy then says, "But Ryoko, technically setting up a wrestling federation is not a scam! Because Vince McMahon does the same thing too! So therefore if he and Stephanie and Shane make a living that way so... yeah..."

Ryoko then looks at Eddy and then she smiles and says, "Well at least you're admiting that's one of the things you can do that a person can make a living off of and you're Making Edna happy so let's see where this goes and maybe after that we can have a bit of wrestling ourselves... lip wrestling!"

Ryoko then starts kissing Eddy as Ed looks in horror and shouts, "OH NO! RYOKO IS A DEMON AND SHE'S EATING EDDY'S FACE!" May Kanker then says to him. "But Ed, she's really kissing him because they like eachother... and Eddy proved to her that this is not a scam... I hope he knows what he's doing, I already had Edna train for 4 hours. Ed, how is the training with Double D?" Ed then says, "Double D is able to pick up Wilfred!"

May then says as she is confused by what Ed just said, "Umm Ed... what were you two doing at Rolf's unless... ED YOU RETURN THAT CHICKEN RIGHT NOW!!!" A chicken pops out of Ed's Jacket and says, "Aww you're no fun! Time to take you home Mac Nugget!"

Soon Sarah, Jimmy, Rolf, Nazz, Jenny, Rachel, Johnny 2x4, Hikari, Kitaro, and Kasumi show up and take their seats. And Eddy shows up in the center of the ring and announces the big event:

_**"LADIES AND GENTLEMAN.... EDS AND KIMONOS... THE EIEIOWF PROUDLY PRESENTS A HUGE PROFESSIONAL WRESTLING EVENT! Out of retirement and back into the ring for more blood it's... THE MASKED MUMBLER!"**_

(Double D appears in his "Maked Mumbler" outfit and just waves in a meek way, his enterance music is "Stand" by R.E.M.)

_**AND HIS LATEST WOULD BE VICTIM IS A NEW CHALLENGER! TRIPLE...E!"**_

(Edna appears in her "Triple E" outfit and is seen carrying a manniquin head with the words "Help me" written on it backwards and a macaw on her shoulder. She tells the readers, "If you dont get the jokes, look up "Al Snow" and "Koko B. Ware" on wikipedia... please!" Her entrance music is "Hit me with your best shot" by Pat Benatar.)

_**AND NOW... LLLLLLLLLET'S GET READY TO RUMBLE!"**_

Edna and Double D look at eachother like most pro wrestlers do and then Edna grabs Double D and lifts him up in the air and before she can slam him to the ground, Edna and Double D can hear "The Undertaker's theme song and to their suprise, they see Lee and Marie Kanker.

Lee then says to them, "Aww... a neighborhood rumble and we weren't invited... JUST LIKE HOW YOU DIDN'T INVITE US TO YOUR BIRTHDAY!!!" Edna then replies, "Yeah well I couldn't figure out if I should trust you two! Also I'm worried about you hitting on Eddy again and Ryoko would beat you up again!"

Lee then replies, "Actually I came just to challenge you to wrestling since it's Kanker tradition... so we challenge you and that guy with the plunger on his head... oh and MAY! YOU'RE GOING TO HELP US! KANKER TRADITION!"

May is sweating in fear and she says, "But Edna... you're my friend... I don't want to to!" Edna just smiles and says, "We always will be friends May... besides this happens in the WWE alot and even I know that it's "fake" (Edna winks at May and she winks back). So go and tag team with your sisters... we'll just find someone to tag team with us... Ryoko Kimono come on down!"

Ryoko and Lee look at eachother and Lee says as she makes a wicked grin, "I've waited for a rematch!"

Eddy then announces and narrarates the match:

_"__**By sheer irony... Triple E's best friend is forced to tag team with her sisters to fight her in a three way match and now they brought my girlfriend as the third person in this fight. The bell rings... Maked Mumbler is being grabbed by Marie and is doing stuff to him that is making Hikari rather angry and she is being restrained by Kasumi and Jimmy. Ryoko is grabbing Lee but Lee fights back by putting her hand under her armpits and putting it on Ryoko's nose. Ryoko is giving that look that says, "Oh sick!" And retaliates by grabbing Lee by the legs and throwing her at Marie who lets Double D go.**_

_**Edna and May just stare at eachother and Edna just jumps at her and appears to be "punching" her, I hear the hitting sounds... but May doesn't appear to be hurt. Ryoko just jumps on May and is about to slam her to the groun until Edna appears to be making a look at her that says, "Ryoko no, she is my friend, WWE is actually "pretending"." Ryoko just puts May down pins her.**_

_**Edna then looks at Lee Kanker and gives that look that says, "You just had to make me wrestle May, didn't you! You jerk!" and she grabs Lee by the shoulders and slams her face to the mat and jumps on her head and it ain't a good sight folks...**_

_**HEY WHAT IS THAT! It look like Kevin is running to the ring and he appears to have a steel chair in his hands. Kevin climbs into the ring and he... OMG! He just hit Edna in the back with the metal chair. He gives her a look and laughs that says, "Take that you dork! This is for being a Ed, making me lose Nazz, and befriended that Kanker!"**_

_**Edna retaliates by performing some sort of punch to Kevin's... YES! She punched him right in the "dork", he feels pain but starts slapping Edna in the face and she knees him in the "dork" again. I'm going in for a closer look at the fight. Edna ends up tackling Kevin. But what is that in the sky?"**_

Ed is in the air and shouts, "ROYAL RUMBLE!" And as he lands on the ring, it starts shaking. Eddy and Edna then notices the ring shaking and they manage to grab May and Ryoko and tosses them out of the ring. The ring then suddenly implodes and everyone on it falls into the hole in the ring.

**(3 hours later)**

Edna, Eddy, Ed, Kevin, Marie Kanker, and Lee Kanker are in the Kasumi's bedroom, covered in bandages, except Lee's face is completly bandaged due to the damage. Lee grumbles something and Edna replies, "I told you over 10 times... You brought this on yourself for making me wrestle May, hitting on Eddy despite having Ryoko as a girlfriend, and for antagonizing me and my friends for the last few chapters... Haven't you learned from the time we saved you from the Kil..." Marie then says, "Look "Ed-girl"... I'm sorry already, I did learn something from this and when those three invaded our trailer... You better learn from this too Lee!" Kevin then says, "I'm surrounded by dorks... this surely is He..."

Kasumi opens the door in her nurses outfit and says, "...ello friends! I brought soup!" Eddy then sees Ryoko and May walk up to him and they kiss his cheeks. Ryoko then says, "I know you knocked us off the ring before it collapsed You do care about me and May... oh and sorry for roughing you up May." May then says, "Apology accepted Ryoko... however this whole thing was Eddy's fault, what with exploiting Edna's thing for wrestling and planning to use the money for yourself and the Eds... So we took your money and sent it to the Kimono's charity fund to prevent breast cancer... and Eddy don't even think of laughing at the name "breast cancer" just because it had the word "breast" in it!"

Eddy then says, "Why laugh? There is nothing funny about breast cancer? What's funny is that Edna got Kevin in the dork!" Kevin replies, "When I get out of this fullbody cast I'm going to go up to you and Edna and I will shove my fist up your as..."

Ryoko then interrupts, "...Xuse me but Edna, what have you learned from this experience?"

Edna replies, "I did learn something... leave professional Wrestling to the professionals!" Ed replies, "When we get better let's play Backyard Wrestling..."

Everyone in the room just shouts, **"NO!!!"**

**NEXT TIME:** Edna cooks burritos for the Eds but they turn out to be accidentally spiked with her older sister's "Guatemalan Insanity Pepper" and soon they find themselves flying to Pepperland on a Yellow Submarine!


	22. Yellow Submarine

**Ed, Edd, Eddy, n Edna**

By Technomaru

**Chapter 22: The Fab Four take a magical mystery tour to Pepperland on their Yellow Submarine for the benefit of Mr. Kite**

**Starring Sgt. Pepper's Lonely Hearts Club Band**

Note: I do not own Ed, Edd, n Eddy...but "The Fourth Ed" and the Kimono Sisters... and brother is mine! Rachel belongs to Squeaken1 though and the new OC Jennifer belongs to yukimizuno.

This is a spin-off of "The Grim ED-ventures of Ed, Edd, n Eddy". I always wondered what if Edna existed in the "Ed, Edd, n Eddy" canon and...THIS STORY DOES NOT CONTAIN SUPERNATURAL ELEMENTS! except for that one chapter as a parody of "Micheal Jackson's Thriller"... I am still sad about the passing of the king of pop!

You can guess what this chapter is a parody of! And note that the peppers are NOT a allagory for drugs... they are just a joke from "The Simpsons"

The fanfic would've used REAL Beatles Songs but some people become butt-hurt when I use them so I decide to shorten and change some of the lyrics of them.

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A week passed since the "wrestling incident" Edna decides to make it up to the Eds for what happened that week. So Edna is in the kitchen making the boys her infamous "Espinoza Burritos", a recipe that was passed down to many women in the Espinoza family.

May was in the garage getting out the sodas and the Eds were waiting in the table. Double D reads the newspaper and he says to the other Eds, "Check this out fellows, Disney, Robert Zemeckis and Apple Corld Ltd. have announced a remake of the classic 1963 animated movie "The Beatles: Yellow Submarine"

Ed and Eddy were clueless about it and Edna says to them through the kitchen, "It's an animated movie that is very psychodelic and it has the best Beatles songs in the soundtrack. Oh the food is ready but it needs one more touch...."

Edna tries to reach for the peppers but she accidentally uses peppers from a box labeled, "Emily's special peppers, do not touch" After finishing the meal, Edna serves the Eds her burritos and she eats hers as well.

Double D then gags and says, "Umm Edna... what types of peppers did you use in the burritos?" Edna then drinks lots of water and sees that she accidentally used her older sister's rare peppers. She gasps and says to the other Eds, "Oh no... those were my sister's "special peppers", "The Merciless Peppers of Quetzlzacatenango - Grown deep in the jungle primeval by the inmates of a Guatemalan insane asylum". One bite makes you larger, another bite makes you smaller, I have to ask my sister if they do anything at all...

Soon, Ed, Edd, Eddy, n Edna then start having a vision. May Kanker sees this and she sees the half eaten peppers and says, "Oh geez! I gotta call the doctor... but first you four must be put in a bed." Soon May puts the four in Edna's parents' bed since it's big enough for them and then she runs to the telephone and asks herself, "How do I call 9-1-1?"

**(The Eds soon hallucinate)**

Ed, Edd, Eddy, n Edna then find themselves on the inside of a yellow submarine, finding themselves sailing in a strange psychadelic multi-colored world. They also find themselves dressed like they are the fab four themselves, Ed is dressed as Ringo, Edd is dressed as Paul, Eddy is dressed as George, and Edna is dressed like John.

They see how weird they look and Eddy then asks Edna, "How come I get to be George?" Ed replies, "It's because while George is "the quiet one" you are the "not so quiet one"... It's all in the mind you know!" Double D looks at himself and says, "I'm obviously Paul because of how much fangirl approval we get." Eddy looks at Edna and asks her, "Well why do you get to be John?" Edna replies, "Well we have three things in common... We both have great singing talent, we both Japanese significant others, and we both wear glasses!"

Eddy then says in confusion, "We all have Japanese significant others but I don't think we should reference Yoko Ono in this fanfic! Come to think of it, why do we have British Accents and why is Ed pulling on the lever?" Ed replies, "Can't help it. I'm a born "Liver-pooler."

As the four look around the submarine they see it's being captained by Captain Fred... FRED FREDBURGER! Edna then says, "Hold on! This isn't "The Grim ED-ventures of Ed, Edd, n Eddy"... so what are you doing here?" Fred replies, "Umm... Help! I need somebody, Help! not just somebody, HELP! I need you guys to save Pepperland from the Blue Meanies...YES!" Double D then explains to Edna, "Well due to the influence of the peppers, it looks like we're living through the plot of that animated Beatles movie... and Fred Fredburger is a result of the said hallocination the Peppers caused." Edna replies, "Geez guys, I already said I was sorry!" Ed then says, "This parrot is dead, it is no more!" Edna just giggles.

Double D then says, "Ok, we'll save Pepperland from the Blue Meanies, now how do we and where is Pepperland?" Captain Fred then replies, "Ummm... find the "Sea of Green"...YES! Also this submarine is powered on love so by saying, "ALL TOGETHER NOW!" Will power it up and Blue Meanies hate love and music YES!"

They pass by "the Sea of Time" and they regress into babies as they see another yellow submarine from 10 minutes ago, but they end up passing by "the Sea of Science" and they return to their normal age and watch a amazing light show. As the five continue to look through the porthole Fred screams, "OH NO! SEA OF MONSTERS! YES!"

They are surrounded by very unusual monsters in this world. A school of whale like creatures swim by and Ed, Edd, n Edna have this to say:

Double D: Look, it's a school of whales.

Ed: They look a little bit old for school.

Double D: University then.

Ed: University of "Wales".

Edna: They look like drop-outs to me.

Soon they find themselves being chased by a giant walrus and Ed says, "Oh no guys, it's going to goo goo ka chew us!" The submarine manages to evade the giant walrus... but they end up encountering a vaccum monster who sucks everything, even the background. The creature is about to suck the submarine but Fred pulls a lever that makes a cigar pop out and fire like a torpedo. The creature smokes it and it explodes, restoring everything to normal and sending the Submarine to the Sea of Nothing, a world that is completely blank and empty.

As Captain Fred Fredburger checks the equiptment, Ed, Edd, Eddy, n Edna encounter a strange, gopher-like little brown-furred man with a blue face, pink ears and a fluffy, rabbit-like tail.

The strange creature then says to the four as he paints, "Hello new friends... Ad hoc, ad loc and quid pro quo. So little time so much to know!" Edna then asks him, "Yes just where are we and who are you?" The creature replies, "Why we're in the sea of nothing, and for myself here are my four cards of I.D.!"

The Eds read the card one by one:

**Jeremy**

**Hilary**

**Boob**

**Ph.D.?!?**

Jeremy continues, "Ph.D yes! for I am a eminent physicist, polyglot classicist, prize-winning botanist, hard-biting satirist, talented pianist, good dentist too" Edna mutters, "And a lousy poet too!"

Then the Eds see Jeremy writing with his foot and telling them "These are the footnotes for my nineteenth book. This is my standard procedure for doing it. And while I compose it, I'm also reviewing it!" Edna asks Jeremy, "...Were your notices good?" Jeremy replies, "It's my policy never to read my reviews." Eddy then says, "Oh great, a boob for all seasons."

Edna then wonders, "There must be a word for who he is." Then the four Eds sing:

He's a real noplace guy,

Sitting in his Noplace Land,

Making all his noplace plans

for nobody.

Doesn't have a point of view,

Knows not where he's going to,

Isn't he a bit like you and me?

Noplace guy please listen,

You don't know what you're missing,

Noplace guy,the world is at your command!

He's a real noplace guy,

Sitting in his Noplace Land,

Making all his noplace plans

for nobody."

As Jeremy sits down crying as he realizes how literally empty and lonely his life is and becomes inconsolable. Edna then replies, "Well ok guys, back on the submarine!" Double D then says, "You know we seem to be a bit harsh to the little guy." Ed replies, "Yeah I feel bad for him!" Edna replies, "Well in the movie John didn't seem that way... by the way Ed, now's your cue!"

Ed then runs to Jeremy and he asks, "Hey Mr. Boob... wanna come with us?" Jeremy replies, "You mean you'd take a noplace guy?" Ed replies, "Yes, we'll take you someplace." Jeremy then dances around as the four go back in the submarine.

As they fly past "the Sea of Heads", Edna then says, "You know those this surreal landscape is makes me feels like singing:

"Picture yourself in a boat on a river,

With tangerine trees and marmalade skies.

Somebody calls you, you answer quite slowly,

A girl with kaleidoscope eyes.

Cellophane flowers of yellow and green,

Towering over your head.

Look for the girl with the sun in her eyes,

And she's gone...

**P**olly in the **C**louds with **P**earls

**P**olly in the **C**louds with **P**earls

**P**olly in the **C**louds with **P**earls

ah... ah...

**P**olly in the **C**louds with **P**earls

**P**olly in the **C**louds with **P**earls

**P**olly in the **C**louds with **P**earls....."

Double D then says to Edna, "Well Edna... I hope no one who reads this part gets the hidden joke!"

They crash into a easter island head. The giant easter island head then shouts, "ME WANT GUM GUM FOR DUM DUM!" Then swallows the whole Yellow Submarine. Soon they find themselves surrounded in a surreal area full of holes. Edna asks Jeremy, "Hey, Jeremy, what do you know about holes?" Then he replies, "There are simply no holes in my education." Edna then replies, "You mean you haven't composed a "hole" book?"

Then all of a sudden, the Yellow Submarine finds itself being attacked by the dreaded flying glove. Captain Fred Fredburger, Edd,Eddy, n Edna are panicing while Jeremy continues his "footnotes".Ed then sees a shiny red button and says, "OOoooh! What does this button do?" After Fred warns him not to press it, Ed presses it anyway and he and Jeremy are ejected from the Yellow Submarine. Fred Fredburger then says, "That was the panic button... YES!"

The flying glove chases after Ed, but Ed escapes through one of the holes and just grabs Jeremy and flies into a green colored hole. Fred then says, "Oh look! The Sea of Green! YES!" Then the Yellow Submarine flies towards "The Sea of Green". Ed then grabs the hole he hid into and says, "I got a hole in me pocket!" and jumps after the Yellow Submarine and goes back inside it.

They finally make it to Pepperland, where everything is colorless and the people are turned to colorless stone. Fred then shouts, "OH NO! They trapped the "Sgt. Pepper's Lonely Hearts Club Band" in the anti-music missle... YES!" Then they encounter the Chief Blue Meanie who says to them, "we blue meanies accept no for a answer...ATTACK THEM MY STORM "BLUE"PERS! ATTACK! Then he summons more of his henchmen, his assistant Max and their army of henchmen, Apple Bonkers, Butterfly Stompers, Snapping Turtle Turks, Jack the Nipper, the Count Down Clowns, the three headed blue dog, and the fearsome Flying Glove.

As Fred flies the Submarine away from them, the Apple Bonkers keep dropping the apples on them. The Count Down Clowns kept bombing them. And the Flying Glove picks up the Submarine and tosses them into the pyramid. The Submarine then falls to the ground and the Butterfly Stompers are stomping allover the Submarine. The Flying Glove flies towards the submarine but he ends up getting his finger caught on the "O" on the giant letters that spell out "LOVE".

The group then see Jeremy tied up to a tree as he shouts, "ED! EDD! EDDY! EDNA! REMEMBER! ALL YOU NEED IS LOVE!"

Fred then says, "Oh yeah, the submarine runs on it and the Blue Meanies are scared of it... now everyone... ALL TOGETHER NOW!"

Then the Eds start singing;

**Ed:** Sail the ship,

Boom, bam, boom

**Edd:** Chop the tree

Boom, bam, boom

**Eddy:** Skip the rope,

Boom, bam, boom

**Edna:** Look at me

"All together now....

All together now

All together now....

All together now"

As they sing, the colors are being restored to Pepperland and the "anti-music missile bubble" bursts, freeing the "Sgt. Pepper's Lonely Hearts Club Band", 4 musicians who resemble Ed, Edd, Eddy, n Edna. Ed then says, "Hey it's our alter-ego men, the ego alter man goo goo ka chew!"

The other meanies appear to be nervous, and Jeremy manages to untie himself. He runs into the Chief Blue Meanie who grabs him and stares at him with spite in his eyes. Jeremy then says out loud, "He does, in truth, seem quite annoyed. Some reference material be-be-before I'm destroyed!" And he reads his poem, "Where ground is soft most often grows, arise! Arise! Arouse! A rose!"

Jeremy sees a rose sprout on the Chief Meanie's nose and asks, "A rosy nose?" The rather annoyed meanie shouts, "SPEAK YOUR LAST PIECE!" Jeremy continues, "Peace! Peace! Supplant the doom and the gloom! Turn off what is sour! Turn into a flower and BLOOM! BLOOM! BLOOM!" He says this as he laughs and a whole bunch of roses grow all over the Chief Blue Meanie, who just runs around shrieking in fear as this happens.

Soon The Eds sing:

"All you need is love (all together, now!)

All you need is love. (everybody!)

All you need is love, love.

Love is all you need (love is all you need)."

Eddy comments, "Yech! All this love is making me and the Blue Meanies sick!" And soon to everyone's suprise, the whole horde of Blue Meanies run out of Pepperland as the people rejoice in peace, love and harmony.

Edna then kinda feel bad for the misguided Blue Meanies, so she shouts, "Hullo, there, blue people! Won't you join us? Hook up, and otherwise co-mingle? Whaddaya say?"

The Chief Blue Meanie then reconsiders, and then says to his long suffering assistant Max, "NO! umm I mean YES!, let us mix, Max. I've never admitted it before, but my cousin is the blue-bird of happiness!

Jeremy then adds, YES! Ah, yes is a word with a glorious ring! A true universal utopious thing! Engenders embracing and chasing of blues, the very best word for the whole world to use!' Captain Fred Fredburger then says, "YES!"

Then Ed, Edd, Eddy, n Edna then have one final song to sing as the citizens of Pepperland, and the Blue Meanies harmonize in peace...

"It's all to much

It's all to much

When I look into your eyes, your love is there for me

And the more I go inside, the more there is to see

It's all too much for me to take

The love that's shining all around you

Everywhere, it's what you make

For us to take, it's all too much...."

**(Then the four Eds wake up from this one messed-up hallucination)**

Double D wakes up first and says, "Umm where are we?" May Kanker shows up and says, "I saw you guys get sick from Edna's peppers and so I finally learned to call 9-1-1 and they sent you to the "Captain" Lou Albano Memorial Hospital. Edna tears up and Ed asks, "What's wrong? The doctor's made us feel better!" Edna then says, "No it's not that, it's just that Captain Lou Albano passed away... he was a professional wrestler and actor from the 80's... he played Mario on "The Super Mario Bros Super Show!" Ed then tears up too and hugs Edna as the two of them cry.

Eddy then says to May, "Hey May, thanks for saving us... yet again! I tell you that pepper gave us some serious freaky visions... just like the time I had a nightmare about telling jokes to wild bears (shivers)."

Ed stops crying and notices something. Ed pulls out a hole from his pocket and says in a British accent, "Hey guys, I got a hole in me pocket!" Eddy asks, "A hole?" Ed replies, "Well, half a hole anyway. I gave the rest to Jeremy." Eddy then asks, "What can he do with half a hole?" And after Ed says, "Fix it to keep his mind from wandering!" Ed and Eddy start laughing out loud.

Double D then notices Edna looking outside with her telescope and looks very concerned so he asks her, "What's the matter, Edna Love? Blue Meanies?" Edna then says, "Newer and bluer Meanies have been sighted in the vicinity of this hospital. There's only one way we can go out!" Double D asks Edna, "How's that?" Edna then smiles and says, "Singing!"

1...

2...

3...

4!

Boom, bam, boom

**Ed:** Sail the ship,

Boom, bam, boom

**Edd:** Chop the tree

Boom, bam, boom

**Eddy:** Skip the rope,

Boom, bam, boom

**Edna:** Look at me

"All together now....

All together now

All together now....

All together now

tous ensemble maintenant

tutti insieme ora

alle zusammen jetzt

todos junto ahora

All together now....

All together now

All together now....

**ALL TOGETHER NOW!**"

**NEXT TIME:** It's Halloween at the Cul-De-Sac so it's Edna and the Kimono Sibling's first Halloween at the Cul-De-Sac so they will be in for a suprise this year...

SPOOK-E-VILLE IS REAL!


	23. I got a rock!

**Ed, Edd, Eddy, n Edna**

By Technomaru

Chapter 23: "I got a rock, The great Trick or Treating scam!"

Note: I do not own Ed, Edd, n Eddy...but "The Fourth Ed" and the Kimono Sisters... and brother is mine! Rachel belongs to Squeaken1 though and the new OC Jennifer belongs to yukimizuno.

This is a spin-off of "The Grim ED-ventures of Ed, Edd, n Eddy". I always wondered what if Edna existed in the "Ed, Edd, n Eddy" canon and...THIS STORY DOES NOT CONTAIN SUPERNATURAL ELEMENTS! even though it's Halloween!

This fanfic contains lots and lots of anime and video game references... try to figure them out! Also the author just found out that Disney really IS going to make "Tron Legacy"

**This fanfic is dedicated to the memory of Captain Lou Albano and Soupy Sales...**

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By the time you read this chapter... Fall has suddenly came to Peach Creek.

Ryoko and Eddy walk to Edna's house just to see how Edna and May are and what they will plan for Halloween. Ryoko then says to Eddy, "Hey Eddy, how about just this once... I let you perform a scam... and let those two on it!" Eddy's eyes perk up upon hearing those words and asks her, "You mean to tell me on this halloween night, you want the both of us to scam... and let Edna and May join us? Me like! So what do we do?" Ryoko smiles and says, "Oh you'll find out... I hope Kasumi doesn't find out."

When Ryoko opened the door, they see Edna dressed as May Kanker but with popcicle sticks in her mouth for buckteeth. Then May Kanker is dressed as Edna but wearing fake glasses. Eddy then says, "Oh geez, first "Weird Science", then "Yellow Submarine" and now "Freaky Friday", why does the author keep remaking movies?" Edna then says, "Relax buddy, we just dressed in eachother's clothing just to pull our "trick" on you... now's the treat! Excuse me while we change out of eachother's clothes.

Soon Eddy and Ryoko see Edna with purple hair, blue overalls, a green shirt, and a winged cap. Edna then smiles and says to Eddy and Ryoko, "N'cha!" Ryoko smiles and says "N'cha to you too Edna!" Eddy is confused and Edna shows Eddy a piece of poop on a stick and says, "Doodie! Doodie!" Eddy cringes in disgust.

Edna then says, "Relax Eddy! I'm dressed as Arale Norimaki from Akira Toriyama's OTHER popular manga and anime "Dr. Slump"." Ryoko then says, "I like Dr. Slump, that manga is so funny! Oh honey, Dr. Slump is about a super strong android girl, the crazy inventor who created her, and the even crazier things that happen in their town of Penguin Villiage.

May shows up dressed as Sailor Venus from "Sailor Moon". May then asks Eddy and Ryoko, "How do I look?" Eddy then says, "Umm... pretty good, we brought our costumes." Edna then says, "Well how about after you change, we'll discuss our scam on this halloween night."

Ryoko is dressed as Ryoko Hakubi from "Tenchi Muyo!" and Eddy is dressed as Beetlejuice. The two look at eachother and are shocked. Eddy asks Ryoko, "I thought you were going to be Lydia Deetz?" Ryoko asks Eddy, "I thought you were going to be Tenchi Masaki?"

Edna smiles and says, "Actually we can do that! With my large wardrobe, my costume making skills, and a night of trick or treating... we can perform this scam... Eddy how would you like some jawbreakers? Ryoko, how would you like to allow Eddy to scam and NOT bring you shame and dishonor? Well let's do this!"

Edna then runs out the door with her arms extended and shouts "KIIIIIIIIIIIIN!" (the sound a airplane makes)

**(Afternoon)**

Eddy asks Edna, "Ok "Ms. Fourth Ed" what's the scam again?" Edna replies, "Ok, we go door to door once, then change our costumes, and do it again, and change our costumes and do it again!" Eddy then says, "I like it, plus kids always do that sort of thing... I mean even you would do that dear reader! Yeah I'm looking at you!" May then giggles and points at the reader.

Eddy is dressed as Beetlejuice, Ryoko is dressed as Lydia Deetz, Edna is dressed as Arale Norimaki, and May Kanker is dressed as Sailor Venus.

**(A hour later)**

Edna then says, "Check out my jawbreakers... so what did you get Eddy?" Eddy then says, "I got a rock!" May then says, "Time to change costumes!"

Eddy is dressed as Mario, Ryoko is dressed as Pauline (from "Donkey Kong"), Edna is dressed as Princess Daisy, and May Kanker is dressed as Princess Peach.

**(A hour later)**

Ryoko then says, "Check out my jawbreakers... so what did you get Eddy?" Eddy then says, "I got a more rocks!" May then says, "Time to change costumes!"

Eddy is dressed as Tenchi Masaki, Ryoko is dressed as Ryoko Hakubi (she does resemble her after all), Edna is dressed as Princess Ayeka, and May Kanker is dressed as Mihoshi.

**(A hour later)**

May then says, "Check out my jawbreakers... so what did you get Eddy?" Eddy then says, "I got rocks.... and a chocolate sailor! YUMMY!" Edna is shocked and grabs it and throws it on the ground." Eddy then says, "HEY! WHAT'S THE BIG IDEA!" Edna then says, "Eddy... chocolate sailors were recalled ever since some dumb kid from Endsville kept eating them until he became a chocolate sailor... then he ate himself." Eddy shivers at the thought and thinks it's just a urban legend. Ryoko then says, "Time to change costumes!" May then says to Ryoko, "Hey that's my line!"

Eddy is dressed as a ghost with too many holes on his sheet, Ryoko is also dressed as a ghost, Edna is dressed as witch, and May Kanker is dressed as a ghost but with a dust cloud surrounding her.

**(A hour later)**

Edna then says, "Check out my jawbreakers... so what did you get Eddy?" Eddy then says, "Good grief...I got rocks.... THEY OWE ME RESTITUTION! Umm Ryoko what is "restitution"? I learned that word from a tv special we're making fun of involving some great pumpkin." Ryoko then says, "Heck if I know Eddy, those kids say alot of things normal kids don't say..."

The group then see Kasumi dressed as Kasumi Tendo from "Ranma 1/2" and Hikari dressed as Hikari Kamiya from "Digimon Adventure 02". Ryoko sees them and says, "Yikes! I gotta get out of here before they see me with you guys in this scam! I'll see you later honey!" Ryoko runs out of sight of the other Kimono Sisters.

Eddy then says, "Well let's just continue with this scam, I'm sure the neighbors will change their minds about giving me rocks.

After changing costumes Eddy is dressed as Kyon, Edna is dressed as Haruhi Suzumiya, and May Kanker is dressed as Mikuru Asahina.

**(A hour later)**

Edna then says, "Check out my jawbreakers... so what did you get Eddy?" Eddy then says, "Doesn't take a genius to figure it out, let's just change costumes already!"

After changing costumes Eddy is dressed as Kyon, Edna is dressed as Haruhi Suzumiya, and May Kanker is dressed as Mikuru Asahina.

**(A hour later)**

After changing costumes Eddy is dressed as Minoru Shiraishi, Edna is dressed as Konata Izumi... dressed as Haruhi Suzumiya, and May Kanker is dressed as Akira Kogami... complete with a bubble gum cigarette in her mouth. Eddy becomes annoyed says to Edna, "I know some people have heard of "Tenchi Muyo" but I doubt anyone here has ever heard of "Lucky Star" Edna!" Edna replies, "Well if I have a beautymark just like Konata then this is my destiny Eddy, isn't that right May!" May then throws a ashtray at Eddy and says, "Bye-nii!" Both girls giggle at this.

**(A hour later)**

Eddy is downright furious and says, "Geez, if I don't know any better, maybe the neighbors know it's me! I keep getting rocks!" Edna then says, "Ok ok, how about we get you a costume where no one can see your face?" Eddy then says, "I like the idea." May then says, "How about we make this our last trip? I mean I heard word that a new annual theme park is opening near Downtown Peach Creek." Edna smiles and says, "Sure May, oh and you guys will love these costumes!" May then asks Edna, "Umm Edna where do you store all those costumes at?" Edna then replies, "Well May, that is the many wonders of a thing called "hammerspace"."

Edna is dressed as Yolei Inoue from "Digimon Adventure 02", "May is dressed as "Zoe Orimoto from "Digimon Frontier", and Eddy is dressed as Impmon from "Digimon Frontier". Eddy then says, "Why do I have to be the Digimon?" Edna replies, "I picked one that better suits your personallity. Eddy just growls as Edna explains what type of digimon Impmon is to the readers.

**Digimon file:**

**Impmon**

**Virus type**

**Rookie Level**

**"Impmon is a rookie level digimon with a demon-like appearance, his "bada boom" attack can cause a huge dark fire explosion, he likes to cause mischief.**

Before they can continue trick or treating, they run into two kids dressed as Bakemon from Digimon. One bakemon costume has blue eyes and the other has red eyes. May then says, "Check it out Edna, two digimon fans! And umm what type of digimon are they dressed as?" Edna explains to May and the readers.

**Digimon file:**

**Bakemon**

**Virus type**

**Champion Level**

**"Bakemon are ghost like digimon with a striking intellect. Their main attack "Zombie claw" can cause anything struck by it to be cursed. Most of the villians from the first season use them as henchmen."**

One of the kids in the bakemon costume with red eyes goes up to Edna and says in a sweet voice, "Cool, you're digimon fans too, can we join you in trick or treating?" Edna then says, "Umm I dunno... can you?" Then they laugh and May then says, "Sure! The more the merrier!"

The other kid in the bakemon costume with blue eyes takes one of Eddy's rocks and takes a bite out of it and tells him, "You know dude, these are really rock candy!" They're a delicacy where they're from!" Eddy makes a huge grin and tries some, he tells the one kid, "Hey you're right! Thanks for the tip."

So after they trick or treated one house. Everyone got jawbreakers... except Eddy... this time he got "mung". Edna sees this and says, "Eww... Wayne and Garth once said that "mung" is the worse thing anyone can get in a candy bag... and you got mung! Oh and in case you all forget, here is Wayne's World's official list of the worse treats you can get on Halloween...

5. Pennies

4. Pop Rocks (poor Mikey...)

3. Taffy Apples (try eating them when they came from a lady who owned a bunch of cats)

2. Hurl (yes... you read right!)

1. **Mung**!

Eddy, May Kanker, and the two kids in the Bakemon costumes shiver in fear. They continued to trick or treat but then Edna finally asks the kid in the red eyed Bakemon costume, "Ok, who are you and why are you very friendly to me?" The kid didn't say anything. Edna starts to lose her patence but then as the group enters the darkest area of the Cul-De-Sac they see what appears to be a boy of twelve years, dressed like a school boy, wearing geta sandals and a yellow and black striped chanchanko vest. The boy has his bangs cover his left eye.

Edna then asks, "Kitaro?" Then the kid turns around and turns out to have a grotesque face and makes a creepy cackle like a witch. Edna then runs away in fear and bumps into the kid in the red-eyed bakemon costume. Kitaro takes off his "Hakaba Kitaro" mask and says, "Geez Edna, I thought Halloween was "the season to be scary"? Edna then laughs and says, "Boy Kitaro, you sure know how to get me good, you know that version of Kitaro scares me the most, he doesn't even fight monsters! Oh let me help you up!"

Edna notices the kid's hands have red fingernail polish and it appears to be wearing jeans and a polkdotted tank top. Edna shivers in fear and says, "Oh no... please say it's not her! Not this time!" The kid asks, "Who are you expecting?" Edna replies, "Julie Killer." The kid then screams, "NEVER MENTION THAT NAME AROUND ME...please?"

Edna then says, "AHA! IT'S YOU! Huh... have we met before?" Edna removed the kid's costume, she turns out to be a girl a bit older than may who has very beautiful red hair worn down, she also has a nicely shaped nose between her two attractive looking green eyes, she was full of beauty.

Edna is confused and says, "Sorry but I thought you were someone else but... oh no... it can't be you... but how...it's impossible... it's as impossible as beating Bald Bull on "Mike Tyson's Punch-Out!" The girl then says in a sweet voice, "Yes it's me Edna... Lee Kanker!"

May then sees the blue-eyed Bakemon costume wearer and she takes off the kid's costume revealing Marie Kanker who just waves at her. Eddy notices how pretty Lee is and walks towards her but May grabs him and says, "You have Ryoko remember?" and they hide behind Kitaro and Edna is shivering in fear and says, "Just what is going on! And why are you more prettier than Cousin Nazz?"

Lee Kanker then says, "Remember the WTF incident?" Marie corrects her by saying, "Actually Lee the Eds' Wrestling organization was called the EIEIOWF" Lee continues, "Anyway when you slamed my face to the mat and stepped on my head repeatedly and Ed caused the ring to implode on itself, my face was literally re-arranged.

It wasn't until the hospital treatments did I realize that no one liked me because I was meant to them and everyone likes you because you're so nice to them and would stand up for them... plus then there's the Killer incident. So I decided that if I ever recovered, me and Marie should turn over a new leaf lest we end up like "THEM"

Days later when my bandages came off I was suprised... my face got rearranged till it was very attractive and beautiful and as a bonus, my third eye was removed and my voice got changed to the point where it doesn't sound like a toilet flushing. Yes I'm a new girl Edna and I owe it all to you! Just for that I want to change my ways and... be friends!"

Edna then sees this and says, "Oh wow... I did this to your face? I guess that means you're the opposite of "if you act ugly you're going to be ugly", now you wanna be "If you are beautiful, you're going to act beautiful... or whatever"

Lee then adds, "Oh and I want to apologize to you and the other Eds and the kids for our reign of terror and Kitaro I'm sorry for threatening your sister and your girlfriend." Marie adds, 'Yeah, me too!" Kitaro just smiles and says, "Heh heh... apology accepted!"

Lee then asks Edna, "So... can I be your friend "Master Edna"?" Edna then says, "Give me time to think.... so what's with the Bakemon costumes?" Lee replies, "Well we wanted to find a way to trick or treat with you guys without being suspected of doing any wrong doing, plus we remembered you liked "Digimon: Digital Monsters"."

Edna then says, "You went through all that just to trick or treat with us and be friends?" Lee and Marie are bowing to Edna and they nod. Edna continues, "Wow... just wow... umm May what's the verdict?" May then replies, "Well after what those two have been through, I guess that means... I have sisters again! That and now we can FINALLY end that "Kanker/Ed fued" so now that Eddy can trust me.

Eddy backs away and says, "Oh no... dealing with one Kanker is ok but THREE! Count me out!" Eddy runs away and Lee shouts, "DON'T YA WANT YOUR JAW BREAKERS?" Eddy runs back and says, "Ok! Besides you're cute anyway!" Lee pushes Eddy and says, "Geez, you have Ryoko remember? I remember because she usually beats me up when I try to hit on you." May then says, "I just remembered, Downtown Peach Creek is opening a new annual theme park, let's go!"

And so Edna, Eddy, Kitaro, May and Lee and Marie Kanker then call it a night for trick or treating and head for Downtown Peach Creek. They run into Ryoko who is near a candy bin. Ryoko then says, "Hi... OMG IT'S LEE!" Kitaro hides Lee and Marie behind him and he tells Ryoko, "Sister dear, those two are totally reformed at the hands of Edna and May. They said that after the Wrestling incident they decided to change their ways or else worse things will come to them. They apologized and will no longer be a threat to us and anyone else."

Ryoko then smiles and says, "I believe you Kitaro... May and Edna don't have black eyes and Eddy has no lipstick marks on his fa... Umm Eddy where did you get that lipstick mark from?" Eddy panics and Ryoko moves her finger up his lip and sticks out her tounge and says, "Made you look! Anyway time to pay up for the scam! I only agreed to this scam if half of the candy is used to donate to children too unfortunate to go trick or treating.

Eddy then frowns and says, "I saw that coming!" May then says, "Actually that's not a bad idea." And with that Edna and May then dumped half their candy in the bins. May then hands Lee and Marie a jawbreaker each. They start crying and Lee then says in her sweetest voice, "I feel so horrible now... I don't even deserve it." May then says, "Well you didn't get a single treat therefore we consider you as "unfortunate"... that reminds me." And May gives Eddy a grape jawbreaker.

Ryoko then says, "Well we got to meet up with Ed, Edd, Hikari, and Kasumi. They must be worried sick about us.

As the group contines the trek, they run into Rachel and Jennifer, Rachel is dressed as Dawn from Pokemon and Jennifer is Sailor Mercury. Rachel then says, "Hi guys.... ACK! MARIE KANKER AND... umm... who's the cute girl?" Edna then says, "Believe it or not it's Lee Kanker. Jennifer then says "Hi". Lee notices her odd behavior and Edna tells her, "Jennifer has Aspergers and it shouldn't be made fun of... especially after when Kevin did it. Marie laughs and says, "Typical of Kevin, I'm Marie Kanker, nice to meet you Jennifer." Jennifer just smiles and asks Rachel, "Are these the Kill..." Rachel covers her mouth and answers, "No they are not! Not at all... they must be friends now since May and Edna don't have black eyes."

Soon they see Hikari and Kasumi with Double D who is dressed as Tron from that one disney movie and Ed who is dressed as Dirk the Daring from the classic 80's video game "Dragon's Lair" Edna walks up to them and says to them, "Hi guys... wow! great costume Ed and Double D! And I'm a fan of both games!" Double D then replies, "Really? I even designed my costume to glow as well (costume glows blue) see?" Hikari hugs him and says to Edna, "Wow, you're dressed as Yolei from Digimon... that means we can DNA Digivolve Gatomon and Aquillamon into Silphymon!" Both girls giggle.

Hikari then sees Lee and Marie and drags Edna to the ground screaming, "OH NO! THE BAD KANKERS! THEY'RE GOING TO GET US! RYOKO WE NEED YOUR HELP!" Kasumi just goes up to Lee and gives her some candy corn and says, "I noticed your bag was empty, enjoy a treat!" Hikari then says, "Kasumi! Those are the girls who treat the Eds badly...except May...she's cool! And what's with Lee's face? She kinda looks like American actress Molly Ringwald" Lee then says while blushing at the comment, "Look girls, I don't want to cause trouble anymore after Edna rearranged my face and those three girls want to be badder than us. How about we do finish the "Kanker-Ed-Kids" treaty so me and my sisters will no longer be pariahs in the town." Hikari whispers to Edna, "Did you also rearrange Lee's brains because she seems a bit smarter after the accident."

Hikari then gets up and says, "Well... ok! I take it you two learned your lession and want to turn over a new leaf... plus I can trust you since Edna and May don't have black eyes and Eddy doesn't have lipstick on his neck." Lee then says, "Why do you guys keep saying that? No matter, the theme park is said to be opening in a few minutes!"

As they trek to Downtown Peach Creek, Lee asks Kitaro Kimono, "So who are you dressed as?" Kitaro replies, "I'm cosplaying as "Hakaba Kitaro", the original version of "Ge Ge Ge no Kitaro" before he was "kid-friendly" I scared Edna pretty good when I did this." Then he puts on his mask and makes the creepy laugh...

Lee then says, "Umm... I wet myself!" Rachel tells her, "Normally girls don't announce that Lee!" Edna then says, "I guess I can run her back to the house and let her use one of my costumes, I need to change myself." May then says, "Me too!" Kitaro then says, "I guess I should retire the "Hakaba Kitaro" guise since it's too creepy, well it's back to being "Kitaro of the Ge Ge Ge forest"."

As the three run for Edna's house. Marie then says, "Umm... I'm going to throw some T.P. at this house that refused to give out candy.

Then the gang hears someone shouting "KIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIN" And sure enough they see Edna dressed as Arale Norimake again running towards them really fast, but with Lee dressed as Sailor Jupiter and May back in her Sailor Venus costume. Jennifer was delighted at their costumes while Ryoko, Kasumi, Hikari, and Kitaro laughed out loud at Edna's costume.

Double D says to them, "Why are you laughing at Edna?" Kitaro replies, "It's not that, it's just that we also like "Dr. Slump" and Edna is the perfect Arale... she even has poop on a stick!" Double D turns around and sees Edna with poop on a stick, she says to him, "N'cha! Doodie! Doodie!" Double D is suprised at her behavior and asks, "What does N'cha mean?" Edna replies, "Oh that's Arale and Senbi Norimaki's way of saying "Konnichewa" Ed asks Edna, "Is it true that Arale met Goku?" Edna then smiles and replies, "Yep! She and the Gat-chans even rode on his nimbus cloud... even Monkey D. Luffy rode on his cloud!" Ed replies, "Because those two are of pure heart!" Lee replies, "I have no idea what you guys are talking about but "Master Edna"... thanks for everything!" Edna smiles and says, "You're welcome..."

So everyone walks to the theme park, they past by Nazz who is dressed as Medusa, Sarah is a princess, and Jimmy is a alien. Edna then says to Nazz, "So Cousin Nazz, you're stuck babysitting... again?" Nazz replies, "Well Cousin Edna... money don't grow on tre... Why is Lee Kanker with your group? And why is she prettier than me?" Edna replies, "Relax, they're cool, and Lee thinks I'm her "Master' and she is my "Disciple" after I rearranged her face and she learned right from wrong after "THOSE THREE" entered Peach Creek.

Nazz then says, ".... I'll buy that one, look I'll join you guys in "Spook-E-Ville" later on after we T.P. that one house that refuses to give out candy." Edna then says, "Yeah... you do that cuz'." As they part ways, Eddy then shouts, "SPOOK-E-VILLE IS REAL?"

Sure enough they go to Spook-E-Ville and it is a real theme park that opens once a year and it has pumpkin themed rides and the admission is free, but Ed and Rachel notices the snack stands have signs that say "free snacks for girls". Ed then says, "Holy Misandry Rachel! Why are snacks given to girls for free?" Rachel then says, "Just like why Cartoon Network started showing "CN Real"... no one knows!"

So they enter the theme park...

**(Meanwhile)**

Marie Kanker stops at this house and is throwing toilet paper at it. But then she sees Nazz doing the same. Marie then says, "Umm... I'm friends with The Eds and Kimonos now... I guess... so you have nothing to worry about!" Nazz replies, "I know, I saw them with Lee and did you notice she looks prettier than us?" Marie then says, "Hey, how about we tick off Edna and she can rearrange our faces to look prettier than Lee... and maybe prettier than Jessica Alba!" Nazz replies, "Oh c'mon, no one's prettier than that!" Nazz and Marie have a huge laugh while Jimmy asks Sarah, "Umm why are they laughing, I thought they were enemies." Sarah replies, "Well after "THOSE THREE" entered the Cul-De-Sac that one time it looks like the Kankers are old news so they might as well get along with us... Oh I hope I never see those three again, they seriously hate us and much as the Kankers.

Soon, Sarah, Jimmy, Nazz, and Marie see Rolf on the ground dragging himself to the four. He tells them, "The sign of the apocalypse has been exposed for "they" have returned." Nazz then says, "Oh Rolf always says that when you and your sisters enter the Cul-De-Sac." Marie then says, "But Rolf we're the good guys now!" Rolf replies, "Shut up Jiggler I'm on to you!" Rolf is handed a giant check for the 100th time the line is mentioned in fanfiction and continues, "No blue haired Siren of the trailer park... I'm talking about...

"THEM!"

Nazz and Marie's eyes are wide open and they run around screaming. Sarah frowns and says, "Oh horse apples! We are going to see them again" Jimmy then says, "We got to warn everybody, please hide us Nazz, they want our hineys again!" Nazz then says, "No Jimmy, they would eventually find you. We got to warn everybody."

So Marie puts Rolf on her back and Nazz is holding Sarah and Jimmy's hands as they run to "Spook-E-ville" and warn everyone that...

**THE KILLER SISTERS ARE BACK!**

**Next Time: Spook-E-ville is one spooky theme park... but with a lot of spooky suprises for the kids.... that and the Killer Sisters return!**


	24. Something Wicked This Way Comes

**Ed, Edd, Eddy, n Edna**

By Technomaru

Chapter 24: Something Wicked This Way Comes

Note: I do not own Ed, Edd, n Eddy...but "The Fourth Ed" and the Kimono Sisters... and brother is mine! Rachel belongs to Squeaken1 though and the new OC Jennifer belongs to yukimizuno.

This is a spin-off of "The Grim ED-ventures of Ed, Edd, n Eddy". I always wondered what if Edna existed in the "Ed, Edd, n Eddy" canon and...THIS STORY DOES NOT CONTAIN SUPERNATURAL ELEMENTS! even though it's Halloween!

This fanfic contains lots and lots of anime and video game references... try to figure them out! Also the author just found out that Disney really IS going to make "Tron Legacy"

The fanfic also makes fun of sickos who like to draw girls being fattened up till they are super mega obese... just thought I'd let you know!

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When the 4 Eds, the 3 Kankers, the 4 Kimonos, and the rest make it to Downtown Peach Creek, the see that "Spook-E-ville" is real and a annual theme park! They seem to notice that all the snacks are free to girls though. So while Edna got out some costumes from "hammerspace" for the ones who don't have one, we have a recap on who is who...

**Halloween Costume Recap**

Ed= Dirk the daring from "Dragon's Lair"

Edd= Tron

Eddy= Beetlejuice (animated version)

Edna= Arale Norimaki from "Dr. Slump"

May Kanker= Sailor Venus from "Sailor Moon"

Lee Kanker= Sailor Jupiter from "Sailor Moon"

Marie Kanker= unkown, probably Bakemon from "Digimon Adventure"

Ryoko Kimono= Ryoko Hakubi from "Tenchi Muyo!"

Hikari Kimono= Hikari Kamiya from "Digimon Adventure 02"

Kasumi Kimono= Kasumi Tendo from "Ranma 1/2"

Kitaro Kimono= Kitaro from "Ge Ge Ge no Kitaro"

Jennifer= Sailor Mercury from "Sailor Moon"

Rachel= Dawn from "Pokemon"

Nazz= Medusa from "Boo Haw Haw"

Sarah= Princess from "Boo Haw Haw"

Jimmy= Alien from "Boo Haw Haw"

Rolf= Someone who really needs medical attention bad!

So they enter Spook-E-Ville and they are amazed at the pumpkin themed attractions, but neglect to read that banner that reads, "Welcome to Spook-E-Ville, sponcered by the commitee of Lemon Brook."

So the 2 Kankers and the 4 Eds went on the Black ferris wheel while Ed says to the Eds, "I hope this isn't the same "Black Ferris" wheel from the Ray Bradbury story of the same name!" Eddy replies, "If it is then expect me to look like how I looked in "Take this Ed and Shove it"." May also replies, "Our scene got deleted from that episode!" Edna gets the "Black Ferris" joke but not the "Take this Ed and shove it one". So while the Eds an Kankers are on the black ferris, Rachel, Hikari, Jennifer, and Ryoko went on a roller coaster where the cars are shaped like pumpkins.

Soon the Kimonos, the Eds, and the Kankers are in bumper cars. Each Kimono rode in the same pumpkin shaped car with the Ed they love and the Lee is seated with Jennifer and May is seated with Rachel.

Soon Edna and May are in a Pumpkin-Pie eating contest. May manages to win the competition. Rachel sees this and says to her, "Amazing, how did you manage to wolf down those pies so easily?" May replies, "Well I saw Ed do it, he saw Kobyashi do it, and he reads issues of "Archie" where Jughead does it." Edna then asks May, "Speaking of Kobyashi, I

Then Edna, Lee, May, and Ed went on a teacup ride. Ed then says, "Ok girls... I dare you to make me throw chunky puffs!" After the three went, "Eww..." They got inside the teacup and spinned it around and around and around. Ed then smiles... but Lee, May, and Edna end up throwing up outside the teacup, Edna then looks at her "chunky puffs" and says, "Carrots? Why is it always carrots? I didn't even eat carrots!" Lee continues to throw up and says to Edna, "TMI Edna! T-M-I!" A hooded figure who runs the ride then says in a demonic voice, "Awww maaaan! Not again!"

As the group meet up, they decided to get some eats. The girls ate the free treats while the boys bought their own food. Double D then says, "You know Edna I'm really enjoying myself (Edna nods) Anyway do we have a amusing story to tell you... Did you know that you weren't always "the fourth Ed"?" Edna's eyes perk up as she asks, "Really?" Double D continued, "Yep! And I think it would be better if Ed would tell the story, Ed if you may?"

Ed then says "One time in Band Camp, I.." Eddy is shocked and says to Ed, "Ed! I thought I was the only one who told dirty jokes and references to me being a perv... not you!" But then Ed says "Actually we were going to go to a band camp but me, Double D and Eddy went to the wrong camp..."

(flashback)

Ed, Edd, n Eddy somehow ended up in Camp Kidney, and a platypus yells at them saying "LOOK YOU MORONIC SIMPLETONS... JUST BECAUSE MY NAME IS EDWARD, DOESN'T MEAN I'M GOING TO BE "THE FOURTH ED"! Besides I already have two morons in my cabin!" Ed then stands next to Skip and Chip the two dung beetles and Raj the elephant says while eating marshmallows "Wow, there's three of them? Since when?" and Clam the...whatever he is says "Duh... three of them!" Eddy then laughs with Lazlo and he says "Your scoutmaster has the same name as Ed?... or should I say... "SCOUTMASTER LUMPY"!" And then all of a sudden Scoutmaster Lumpus appears and yells at the three "YOU NO GOOD HUMANS, THIS CAMP IS ONLY FOR ANIMALS...IF YOU WANT TO GO TO A HUMAN CAMP, TRY "CAMP WANNAWEEP!" And when the three Eds heard the name of the other camp they were shivering in fear.

(flashback ends)

Double D then says "Our 3 weeks at "Camp Wannaweep" are a different story. Ed then says I also remember the time we caught Double D reading "Makeout Paradise in School!"

(flashback begins)

Double D makes a weird grin while reading what appears to be "Makeout Paradise" and Ed and Eddy appear and Eddy says "AHA! Caught ya! you should feel ashamed of yourself!" Ed then says "YEAH YOU SNEAK!" Eddy then says "Students like you give students like us a bad name!" And then Eddy removes what turns out to be the cover of "Makeout Paradice" for Double D really used it to cover his "PLATO" book and Double D says "OK OK, I PROMISE NOT TO STUDY GREEK PHILOSPHY WHILE SCAMMING!"

(flashback ends)

May then says "Wow, that sounded like something from a humor magazine that shows a lighter side of studying." Edna replies, "Actually those two jokes look like something straight out of "Family Guy"." Lee then asks Edna, "You like Family Guy too?" Do you also like "Beavis and Butthead"?" Edna smiles and nods.

However Hikari says to the two, "Sorry but we of the Kimono clan dislike "Beavis and Butthead" due to how rude, immature, sexist, and disgusting those two are.... isn't that right Ryoko?... Ryoko?" Ryoko just whistles and then says to Hikari, "Yeah... sure... whatever. Man these corndogs are tasty." Lee then says, "Hey, me, Rachel, and May all have to go to the "ladies room" see ya later!"

Upon further inspection, Hikari notices the corndog batter appears to be chocolate. Hikari drops it and shivers in fear. Double D asks, "Hikari, what's wrong? It looks like that face Edna makes when she sees a clo (Edna looks at him) ne, yeah that's it, clones, just like in "Invasion of the Body Snatchers"." Ed then says, "CLONES PERFORM AT THE CIRCUS and they eat peanuts!"

Hikari then says, "Well "Sockhat-kun" If there is one thing us Japanese girls fear other than evil spirits, thunder, and tentacles is when we get the feeling that we are being forced-fed until we are super mega obese." Ryoko's eyes perk up and drops the corndog and says, "No wonder why the snacks is for free to girls, We got to warn the Kan..."

But then the group sees what appears to be a chubby girl in a gothic lolita dress and a top hat walking towards them accompanied by two minions dressed in skeleton costumes. The girl in the top hat asks Double D, "Excuse me guests of Spook-E-ville but have you seen these three girls?" Then with both hands extended, she shows them images of Lee and Marie Kanker's faces on her hands while one of the "skeletons" takes off it's glove and May's face appears in it's bare hand.

The group shivers and Eddy just says, "Umm... nope and I'm going to pretend I didn't just see that... ummm what's your name?" The girl then says, "Ok, oh and the name is "Ms. Dark" And with that, Ms. Dark and her minions just walk away while at the same time the Kanker Sisters return from the restroom.

Then two hooded figures see the Kankers and only Edna notices them. The two hooded figures them pull out a bazooka like weapon and they try to aim it for Lee and May's faces. Edna then runs towards the two and pushes them away while the bazooka fires. It was 2 pies that flies out of the strange bazooka and they end up hitting Edna's face.

Edna appeared to be sick after eating the pies and asks, "Oh man, it felt like I gained 5 lbs. Ok... who would bake a pie containing chocolate, peanut butter, butterscotch, marmalade, and... (echos) MARSHMALLOWS!?" Lee and May jump the two hooded figures and give them a beating while Lee shouts, "How dare you hurt my new friend! She took 5 lbs for me!" Ryoko then says, "Hey Lee... save some for me!"

Ryoko holds the two to the wall and asks them, "Ok you bakas! Who do you work for? Grandma Stuffums? Alfred E. Kahn? The Kank.... oh yeah that's right..." One of them speaks as they reveal their "demonic voices" are really voice devices and they speak like nerds, "We are the infamous WG cult and we were sent to fatten up these girls!" They hold out their bare hands showing them images of Lee and Marie Kanker's faces on his hands while the other member has and May's face appears in his bare hand.

Eddy then says, "Ok this is seriously freaking me out, now how can you guys be infamous if we just heard about you? Ryoko slaps them both and she says, "I know you both... you are what Ollie Williams would say....

(Ollie Williams walks by in a Mohji costume saying, "Them's Chubby Casers")

Yeah, thanks Ollie, The WG (weight gain) Cult are a nerdy pseudo-satanic like cult who is obsessed with capturing or drawing cute animated girls being force-fed till they become super mega obsese... something that has happened to May from "Pokemon" alot. You guys are known for creating weapons that fire fattening foods that were designed to fatten up innocent girls... "

Jenny and Rachel start throwing rocks at the two because they have seen stuff like the ones Ryoko described on Devianart's website... and for fattening up Edna. Ryoko then says, "Ok "Dumb and Dumber"! Now tell me... what are you doing here and... oh right I have one guess on who hired you!"

The other WG cult member then adds, "Yeah the three girls from Lemon Brook hired us to assassinate the Kanker Sisters and in exchange they would allow us to fatten any girl we desire in anyway way we desire."

The group looks at eachother and shout...

"**THE KILLER SISTERS ARE IN SPOOK-E-VILLE?!?"**

The one WG cult member then says, "Oh and we're not the only ones who work for the Killers... OK BOYS! COVER THEM!"

The Eds, the Kankers, and the Kids find themselves surrounded by other WG cult members who are armed with bazookas. Then they see giant football players, Ed, Edd, n Eddy shouts, "**IT'S THE LEMON BROOK LUMPERS! AAAHHHH!"**

Then Eddy hears the sound of clapping and they see the chubby girl and her cohorts clapping, they take off their disguises and they are Julie, Lindsay, and Tara Killer!" Julie then says, "Miss us?" Jenny asks Rachel, "Hey Rachel, I thought they were mean and lean but they seem to let themselves go!" Eddy answers, "Me too!" Lindsay then responds, "Hey shut up! We're just addicted to the food in "Gulliver's Buffet"."

Hikari hits her fist and says, "Oh no... I remembered, when the board rejected the proposal to built Gulliver's at Peach Creek... they must've built one in Lemon Brook instead!"

Kevin shows up in a Hockey Mask and baseball bat and runs to Edna shouting, "Ok you! Time for reven... umm are those the Killer Sisters behind me?" Ryoko then says, "Kevin you dork! Now is not not time, those three are back and they really want the Kankers and our men!"

Julie then says, "I only see May Kanker and our former "Gofer" Rachel... where are the other two and why is that pretty girl reminding me of Lee the ugly one?" Lindsay just says, "Who cares, let's kick their butts and set May's hair on fire... FIRE! FIRE! FIRE! FIRE!" Hikari just throws a rock at Lindsay's face and says to her, "Don't imitate Beavis you Butthead!" Julie then laughs and says to Hikari, "You know girl I never met... that's pretty darn funny! You're ok with me... too bad I have to hurt you all and take the Kankers' "Boyfriends" as our own while the WG cult fatten you all up!

Then suddenly, Nazz, Rolf, Marie, Sarah, and Jimmy show up and Nazz yells out, "Cousin Edna... guys... The Killer Sisters are... uh...oh!" Julie then makes a creepy grin and says, "Oh cool! It's "Dutch", "Frog-face", "Immigrant", "Dumb Blonde", and a Kanker!" Julie replies, "Yeah it's gonna be a Massacre, Massacre, MASSACRE! HEH HEH M HEH!" Hikari throws another rock at Lindsay and says to her while Julie laughs, "Now what did I just say?"

Julie then says, "You know when my mom arranged this fair with the mayor of Peach Creek, I'm suprised to see you all and it looks like you fell for the trap here's the part where I tell you all that our minions are preventing you all from escaping and here's the part where we tell the Kankers that while they were in the fair... WE BURNED THEIR TRAILER TO THE GROUND!"

Julie replies, "Mommy screamed REAL good when she died!" Tara then says, "Umm I believe she didn't. I saw Bebe Kanker escape the trailer before we burned it down, now why would you say that?' Julie then says, "I dunno, it got it from some Nintendo 64 game involving animals in space." Julie continues, "Anyway I saved THIS!

Julie Killer pulls out the Kanker's "Ship-inna-bottle" and Lee absentmindely shouts "OUR FAMILY HEIRLOOM!" Julie is confused and says, "You can't possibly be Lee Kanker... She's more uglier than "Ugly Betty" (Edna: Hey!) So anyway... CHECK THIS OUT!"

Julie places the "Ship-inna-bottle" on the ground and the three of them smash it right in front of the Kankers, laughing in a very cruel tone. The Kankers are devestated and break down crying, while Ed shouts, "Mazel Tov!" Sara then shouts, "You idiot! We're not Jewish!" Ed replies, "But baby sister! I need to break the mood!"

Lee Kanker tells them, "I'm glad me and my sisters decided to give up our ways and try to be friends with the other kids... BECAUSE WE DON'T WANT TO BE INHUMAN MONSTERS LIKE YOURSELVES!" Julie replies, "Oh sticks and stones may break out bones.... and yours too!" Julie, Lindsay, and Tara then throw sticks and stones at Marie Kanker but then Kasumi stands in front of Marie and the sticks and stones somehow stop and fall to the ground.

Julie is shocked and Lindsay then says, "Oh no! It's the Japanese girl who acts very maternal to anyone she meets!" Edna then recovers from the over-eating attack and then she says, "Ok guys we beat them once and we can beat them again!"

And with that, Edna then starts singing "Tarzan Boy" by "Baltamora", thinking 80's music can drive them away but unfortunately the Killer Sisters start dancing to it. Julie walks up to her saying, "Nice try "Ed-Girl" but we built a immunity to 80's music! You can sing "Wang Chung" and nothing will happen!"

Everyone is afraid now and then Lindsay and Tara pulls out a spinning wheel and says "Spin the wheel, make the deal!"

Soon the kids fear for the worst when that wheel stops, the WG cult arm their bazookas, and the Lemon Brook Lumpers stretch their muscles.

**NEXT TIME: HALLOWEEN HAVOC!**


	25. Halloween Havoc

**Ed, Edd, Eddy, n Edna**

By Technomaru

Chapter 25: Halloween Havoc, Revenge of the Killer Sisters!!!!

Note: I do not own Ed, Edd, n Eddy...but "The Fourth Ed" and the Kimono Sisters... and brother is mine! Rachel belongs to Squeaken1 though and the new OC Jennifer belongs to yukimizuno.

This is a spin-off of "The Grim ED-ventures of Ed, Edd, n Eddy". I always wondered what if Edna existed in the "Ed, Edd, n Eddy" canon and...THIS STORY DOES NOT CONTAIN SUPERNATURAL ELEMENTS! even though it's Halloween!

This fanfic contains lots and lots of anime and video game references... try to figure them out! Also the author just found out that Disney really IS going to make "Tron Legacy"

The fanfic also makes fun of sickos who like to draw girls being fattened up till they are super mega obese... just thought I'd let you know!

by the time you get this, "Ed, Edd, n Eddy's Big Picture Show" finally aired in America!

**IMPORTANT NOTE:** Due to alot of hard work at my job and other fanfics I need to continue, Ed, Edd, Eddy, n Edna will be on hiatus for a while... that way I can come up with more ideas! Please review the story and voice your opinion about the temporary hiatus... thank you!

And yes I am a fan of "Tenchi Muyo!" to the point of my OC Ryoko Kimono being based on Ryoko Hakubi!

* * *

**Last time: As the 4 Eds, the 3 Kankers, the 4 Kimonos, and the Kids enter "Spook-E-Ville" it turns out to be a trap set by the Killer Sisters and their minions and they are determined to get their revenge and finish what they started... so far they burned the Kanker's trailer down, threatened their mom, and broke their "ship-inna-bottle"... and now things get worse when they spin the wheel to see what they will do next... that and Edna gained 5 lbs. from taking a hit for the now grateful (and now beautiful) Lee Kanker.**

As the wheel continues to spin, Edna then says, "Oh you guys ripped this off of "WCW Halloween Havoc 1993!"

As the wheel spins, it stops at "Battle the strongest kids in Spook-E-Ville" Julie then says to the kids, "You guys got lucky... we also had "Set the whole park on fire" or "Perform one "Jigsaw Torture on a Kanker while you guys watch" section of our wheel. So which one of you losers think you can take us on? The others can deal with the Lemon Brook Lumpers and the WG cult members."

Ryoko rises up and says, "I'll accept that challenge since I'm the physically strong one... and I want to protect my man! Rolf you can participate since you're strong too... and Ed you're dressed like a knight! I'll need your help!" Ed then shouts, "I AM DIRK THE DARING!" Ryoko then rolls her eyes and says, "Yeah and I'm Space Ace... just get your butt in this three way battle!"

Ryoko and Julie Killer exchange glances... Ryoko then says, "So we finally meet, so tell me... Do you really love Eddy Mc Lovin'?" Julie replies, "Umm.... not really.... we just wanted to steal or destroy anything the Kankers like." Ryoko then replies, "Before my friends battle your sisters I have one question to ask... put your ear next to my mouth cuz' I'm going to whisper it in it... 'xcuse me while I get my bullhorn... and I'm going to tickle my throat... ok...

**WHAT THE F&&K IS YOUR PROBLEM!!!!"**

Julie then says, "Oooow! What is YOUR problem! You big jerk!" Julie slaps Ryoko and she replies, "Oh yeah well you're the one who goes around performing criminal acts with your sisters and threatening the lives of three trailer trash who didn't even do anything to you!" Lee then looks at her and Ryoko then says, "Ummm.. I mean threatening the lives of three honorable girls of the trailer clan who didn't even do anything to you...better?" Lee smiles and nods as the two continue the battle.

Tara pulls out a spiked mace and says to Rolf, "C'mon you...umm... I dunno what country you're from but I can't think of a racist comment to go with it!" Rolf then walks up to a tree and lifts it from the ground and looks like he's about to hit her with it. Julie then walks back and asks Rolf while extending her hand, "Friends?"

Lindsay then pulls out a lighter. Ed asks himself, "What would Dirk do in this situation against something worse than a Kanker and Singe the Dragon... If I attack her surely this would happen:

(Ed pulls out his wooden sword and decides to attack Lindsay Killer but she sets the sword on fire and jumps at Ed, smothering him in hugs and kisses until he dies of a heart attack)

But if I were to run away from the "heck-spawn", surely this would happen:

(Ed runs off but he bumps into a team member of the Lemon Brook Lumpers and he pounds him to the ground)

And if I chose eat peanut butter sandwiches without drinking milk, surely this would happen:

(Ed has peanut butter stuck to the roof of his mouth with no luck of getting it off)

So I shall watch her moves!" Ed then moves to the left, to the right, back, back, to the left, to the left, moves forward and uses his "sword" to knock off her lighter and hits her in the head with it. Julie then says, "Owwww! That hurts... Where do you get off hurting girls like me... and are you dressed like the hero from the video game "Dragon's Lair"?" Ed replies "Yes I am! And you're the one who set fire to the Kankers' trailer!" Lindsay then says, "Good point!"

Ryoko then says, "This is getting nowhere... howabout we make this battle a RPG themed battle!" Julie then says, "Agreed!" And soon the scenario resembles something from a "Square-Enix" game or a "Earthbound" game.

The Killer Sisters want to fight

Julie Killer lost her temper!

Julie Killer's offense raised by 4.

Ryoko attacks.

30 HP of damage to Julie Killer

Ed attacks.

37 HP of damage to Lindsay Killer.

Tara Killer ran away due to fear of Rolf's strength.

Julie and Lindsay Killer get angry.

Julie and Lindsay Killer's offence raised by 13.

Rolf ate the onion.

Rolf recovered 75 HP

Lindsay Killer uses PK Fire α!

Lindsay Killer missed!

Julie Killer uses PK kick your $$!

22 HP of damage to Ryoko.

Ryoko tried "UHF reference"

Ryoko goes up to Julie Killer and says, "Hi Julie, Look up! Look down! Now say hi to "Mr. Frying Pan!" And Ryoko hits Julie Killer in the face with a frying pan.

27 HP of damage to Julie Killer!

Ed uses sword.

37 HP of damage to Lindsay Killer.

Lindsay Killer was defeated!

YOU WIN!

Ed gains 1900 exp.

Ed's level is now 13.

Rolf gains 84 exp.

Rolf's level is now ??.

As the RPG-themed battle is close to a end. Julie grabs Ryoko and keeps kneeing her in the stomach. Then Edna shows up and says, "No Ryoko... I shall finish the battle!"

Edna and Julie look at eachother. Edna then says, "You shall pay for what you did to my best friend and her sisters... and my other three best friends...LET US KUNG-FU FIGHT!"

So the two start fighting eachother with punches and kicks, Ryoko manages to grab Edna's glasses so they won't be broken. As Julie bodyslams Edna, Ryoko tells her, "Oh no! I forgot you can't see without them, I'm sorry!" Edna replies, "Well at least my glasses won't break... hey Julie your epidermis is showing!" Julie stops and checks and Edna then says, "Kidd-ing!" Then punches her jaw... and punches her again and says, "And this is for making the Kankers and the Eds cry!"

A tooth lands on Edna's hand. Julie then says, "Umm I guess I knocked out one of your... Uh oh... that one's mine! YOU MADE ME SPILL MY OWN BLOOD AND BROKE ONE OF MY TEETH! TIME TO DIE!" Julie then runs towards Edna in full speed but then Edna leaps in slow motion, Edna prepares the kick but Julie dodges it in slow motion. Julie then throws a pumpkin at Edna but Edna moves her back slowly and dodges it.

Ed and Rolf sit on a tied up Lindsay Killer and Ed comments while eating candy corn, "It's just like the "Matrix"!" Edna then says, "Hey Julie... got ya something!" Julie sees that Edna pulls out a pack of "King Ground cigarettes" from her pocket.

**(Note that the Killer Sisters are bad bad girls and smoking is really bad! Plus only bad people smoke... well some people are good yet they smoke but.... OH JUST DON'T SMOKE OK?)**

Julie drools at the sight and she says, "Please surrender the cigarettes... I'll be your friend!" Edna then says, "Come and get it!" Julie runs towards her but only for Edna to perform "The Vulcan neck pinch" on her. Julie asks her, "What the hell are you doing?, Edna replies, "The Vulcan neck pinch?" Julie replies, "No, no, no, stupid, you've got it much too high. It's down here where the shoulder meets the neck." Edna does it and asks, "Like this? Julie then replies, "Yeah!" And falls to the ground as she snores. Edna just thanks her and Ed just says, "Not even I'm THAT dumb Edna!" Rolf then shouts, "THE SON OF THE SHEPARD HAS HELPED YOU DEFEATED THE TRUE SPAWN OF EVIL! Now how about Rolf get orange smoothies for "Oni-girl", "Ed-boy" and "Ed-girl"?"

Ryoko then says, "I'll forgive you for comparing me to a "Oni" but first of all... where did our friends go? What do we do with these monsters.... and where did our friends go?"

**(The other side of the carnival)**

Ed, Eddy, Lee, Marie, May, Kasumi, Hikari, Kitaro, Nazz, Sarah, Jimmy, Kevin, Rachel, and Jenny are being chased by the Lemon Brook Lumpers and the WG cult members. But then Tara Killer shows up in front of them and says, "Going somewhere? I will not let you leave until you surrender the Kankers and pour their blood in this jar!" Jenny lets out a frightened scream and punches Tara, making a squirt of blood fall in the jar." Tara then says, "You are so going to pay for that... FATTEN THEM UP! Especially the Kankers, the gopher, froglips, dutch, and that "Aspie" that broke my nose!" The Lemon Brook Lumpers manage to grab the kids and the cult members arm their food weapons and prepares to blast them...

But then two planks of wood were flying and they knock off the WG cult members' weapons to the ground and then they see the one and only "Captain Melonhead" arriving to the rescue. Melonhead hits Julie in the nose again with Splinter and says to her, "And that is for the "Aspie" remark!" Melonhead throws Plank at the Lumper who is holding Kitaro and as he escaped, Kitaro launces his Geta Sandals at the faces of the other Lumpers, freeing the kids.

So while Captain Melonhead and Kitaro fought off the Lemon Brook Lumpers, Sarah, Jimmy, Nazz, and Jenny managed to escape "Spook-E-Ville" with the help of Hikari, Kasumi, and Kitaro while Rachel shouts at them, "RUN! JUST GET OUT OF HERE BEFORE IT'S TOO LATE!". Marie and Lee manage to beat up a few WG cult members and Lee spits on the leader's face telling him, "And that's for fattening up my new friend who took the hit for me!"

As Edna and Ryoko were out looking for the others, they hear Ed shout, "JULIE AND TARA JUST ESCA..." Edna and Ryoko feel the chill down their spine upon hearing the words and make a run for the entrance.

They see Julie strangling Lee who finally realizes it is her despite her new appearance, Tara threatening to have her way with Double D while Marie is tied up, and Lindsay giving a noogie to May. Edna then runs to them but she is blocked by the Lemon Brook Lumpers. However Ryoko grabs Edna and tosses her over the two football players and she lands on Julie. Edna asks Lee, "Are you ok?" Lee then says, "Wow... you actually care for me! I owe you many master Edna!" Lee then pulls Tara's hair while Edna frees Marie. Edna then grabs Lindsay and shouts, "BIG MISTAKE!" And she pulls out Lindsay's bellybutton ring and Lindsay shouts in pain and calmly says to Edna, "Luckly it's a clip-on!"

So the Killers regroup and to their horror, they see that every member of the WG cult and the Lemon Brook Lumpers are knocked out. Julie then says, "Either way, we still have our secret technique... THE TURBO TRIO SALVA!"

Julie, Lindsay, and Tara tie their fists together with rope and they punch Edna in the gut with their tied up fists. And as soon as they plan to pound her to the ground, Ed, Edd, n Eddy tosses a barrel at them, they roll off a slope only for them to land on a carosel. Then lightning strikes at the carosel, causing to to spin rapidly and going out of control. The Killer Sisters scream in pure fear while this happens.

Ryoko, Lee, Marie, Rachel May, Ed, Edd, Eddy, n Edna run to the carosel to see what is happening. By the time they get there, they see three charred skeleons...

Eddy is shocked at this site while Ed grabs a skeleton and tries to give it mouth to mouth, with Ed shouting, "BREATHE! BREATHE! BREATHE!" Double D is horrified and says, "I know they deserve something for a comeuppance but death is not a answer... what should we tell the police? I'm too young for prison!" Ryoko looks up and smiles as she taps Double D's shoulder and points at the tree.

Sure enough the Killer Sisters are stuck on a tree with Julie shouting, "That carosel sent us flying up here!" Tara adds, "Those are decorations on the carosel mind you!" Lindsay then shouts, "I HATE HEIGHTS! GET US DOWN!" Marie picks up a rock and Rachel shows up saying, "No Marie.... not this time... IT'S MY TURN!" Rachel then throws a rock at Lindsay's head and she says, "And that's for the noodle incident back in Lemon Brook Jr. High! And this next rock is for burning down the Kanker trailer!"

Soon Kevin is seen and Edna says, "Kevin if you're planning to do something bad in revenge... do it some other time!" Kevin then says, "Actually I want to put that feud to rest for a while... that and I called the cops... not even the Kankers deserve that!"

Kevin just walks away while the police show up in time. One of the WG cult members says, "Oh no... not again!" Julie then says, "HOLY SCHNIKES!!! IT'S THE COPS! AND WE'RE NOT IN LEMON BROOK SO DADDY CAN'T BAIL US OUT!" Tara then says, "Looks like we're going back to "Juvie" Sisters!" Lindsay then replies, "Oh Juvie might not be bad for us... I mean we might lose the weight, work out, and be strong enough to fatally would the Kankers next time... am I right?"

Soon due to the weight, Julie's branch breaks and soon the three fall off the tree and are surrounded by the cops.

**(A hour later)**

Ryoko goes up to the Eds and the Kankers and tells them, "Ok, I told them what happened and here's the thing... the Killers are definately going to Juvenile Hall for threatening to hurt you guys, setting the trailer on fire, they almost killed Ms. Kanker, did property damage, and they are in cahoots with the WG cult.

Edna notices the two Kankers are sad and says to Ryoko, yeah but one thing still bothers me... without their home what are May's sisters going to do... that reminds me my house will be fumigated for "caca-roaches" for a week!" Ryoko then says, "Oh... didn't think of that... and the Kimono guest house is finished yet... that means we're going to have to have you four temporarily live with one of the Eds."

As the whole fiasco with "Spook-E-Ville" ending and Halloween almost ends... the four walk home along with Rachel who wanted to see the Killers get their just deserts. When Ryoko brought up the topic of the Kankers' new dwelling... this happened!

Eddy shouts, "ARE YOU FUDGING KIDDING ME! I HATE THE KANKERS! But then again I hate the Killer Sisters now! BUT STILL NO!" Ryoko then says, "It is only temporary! Plus I don't think the kids would accept them... maybe Edna but I dunno... and also I asked Ed and Double D...

Edd: Mother and Father do not like the idea of girls moving into our establishment, sorry to say!

Ed: Mommy, Daddy, and Sarah won't like it at all! Plus my room is a literal pigsty! HAHA!

So therefore the only good enough place to live is yours!"

Eddy looks at Lee, Marie, and May making puppy-dog eyes while May plays the violin. Eddy then says, "You girls should be lucky Ryoko reconfigured my heart otherwise I'd give you to the Killers... but then again it isn't right what they did... NO! I'M A MAN AND I HAVE HONOR AND A PEN..." Ryoko interrupts Eddy and adds, "Don't say it! Plus you probably lost it if you're being dishonorable Eddy!

Eddy continues, "I dunno if I should even let them!" Edna then says, "You get to have me for a roommate!" Eddy then "humphs" at Edna and the 5 talk it out and Double D joins in.

Edna then says to Eddy, "Ok... if you let us live with you for a while... Lee agrees to pay you back in all the money she took from you... we will make you breakfast in cosplay, May gets to clean the gutters, Marie will help your family with groceries, I will make every 12 year old's dream come true... and..." Ryoko interrupts, "And I will fix you up with front row seats at a Tom Jones concert!" Eddy drools and says, "YES OH YES! I EVEN SIGNED THE CONTRACT NOW GIMMIE GIMMIE GIMMIE!"

Edna is shocked and says, "You like Tom Jones? Is the Cul-De-Sac stuck in the 70's?" Eddy then says, "Oh yeah well I see you have posters of "Journey" and "Kidd Video" in your room! Should I make fun of those 80's bands?" Edna then says, "Ok you have your tastes and I have mine... now let's just go home and get the sisters settled in.

Sure enough, Eddy got his tickets, the money from Lee, and his breakfast in bed....

**(November 1st)**

Eddy wakes up and sees Lee Kanker serve him breakfast, dressed as Washu from "Tenchi Muyo". Eddy then says, "Umm... why are you dressed like Washu Lee?" Lee replies, "I thought every 12 year old boy wanted to live the life of Tenchi Masaki... also it was Ryoko's idea!" Ryoko shows up in her costume and glomps Eddy, then he sees May dressed as Mihoshi, Edna dressed as Kiyone, Marie in a Ryo-oki costume, and Rachel shows up in a Sasami costume. Everyone looks at Rachel and she replies, "What? You girls are doing it too!"

Eddy sees this and says, "Ok... I am officially freaked out! It's like a anime convention in my room!" Edna then says, "That's our Eddy!" Then everyone laughs. Nazz shows up dressed as Princess Ayeka and says, "Hey everyone I heard there's a festi... hey why is everyone dressed up as Tenchi Muyo! Characters too?"

Then everyone just laughs at the awkward situation while Eddy just says, "I hope the Tom Jones are worth this madness!"

**THE END... for a while!**

**Next Time: I need a idea for a new chapter!**


	26. V

**Ed, Edd, Eddy, n Edna**

**エド エッド エディ エドナ**

By Technomaru

Chapter 26:** V**

Note: I do not own Ed, Edd, n Eddy...but "The Fourth Ed" and the Kimono Sisters... and brother is mine! Rachel belongs to Squeaken1 though and the new OC Jennifer belongs to yukimizuno.

This is a spin-off of "The Grim ED-ventures of Ed, Edd, n Eddy". I always wondered what if Edna existed in the "Ed, Edd, n Eddy" canon and...THIS STORY DOES NOT CONTAIN SUPERNATURAL ELEMENTS! This doesn't count as this is Sci-fi.

by the time you get this, "Ed, Edd, n Eddy's Big Picture Show" finally aired in America!

This fanfic is a obvious parody of the 1983 mini-series "V" and it's 2009 reboot that won't continue until March 2010.

* * *

One fall day in the Cul-De-Sac, Edna invites the male Eds to her house for some tea. Edna then says to them, "Welcome guys, feel right at home... oh I gotta get out my "medicine"!"

As Edna is away, Eddy then says to Double D and Ed, "Hey Lumpy, Sockhead, ever notice that ever since Edna entered the picture things have been going our way?" Ed then randomly says, "Yeah... she's either a mary sue or a...a..." Double D meekly replies, "Alien?" Ed replies, "Yeah... no one on earth would ever be kind to us before she arrived here."

Ed, Edd, n Eddy then sneak through the house and they hide in a closet, they see Edna in a red jumpsuit like uniform with a strange symbol on it that looks kinda like a swastika. They look on as they see the Kanker Sisters in cages, dressed like Guinea Pigs. They seem awfully terrified. Then Edna opens Lee's cage and opens her mouth to the point where it's bigger than Lee's head and manages to devour her whole. Edna then says to May in a distorded voice, "I'll save you last my sweet!" Ed screams, "SHE'S A ALIEN!" Then Eddy says, "Way to go bonehead!"

Then Edna sees them and says, "So now you know my secret!" Then the Eds manage to escape the closet and Ed pulls off Edna's face. Eddy then says, "Edna... you dropped your face!" Then Edna reveals herself to have a reptilian face with red eyes and a forked tounge." Yes you are right Ed, and this "Mary Sue" persona you earthlings keep accusing me and my friends of is actually a act to prevent you from knowing our true selves. I'll let you three live for it doesn't matter..." Edna then pulls out a communicator and she says, "My fellow "Visitors".... COMMENCE THE INVASION!"

The Eds are shocked and Eddy then says, "If this is true then that means all the "Mary Sue" characters in this fanfic are.... OH NO! RYOKO!"

The worst is yet to come... soon the "Kimono Siblings" take off their masks and they are flying Visitor aircrafts while "Rachel" and "Jenny" are parading in their uniforms firing their laser guns at random buildings and Rachel shoots Plank dead. Jenny then says, "Uh oh... my gun doesn't work anymore, I guess the author ran out of money for the budget of special effects.

Rachel and Jenny then see the Killer Sisters in Visitor uniforms and Rachel then says, "Hey waitaminute! You're not one of us!"

Julie Killer then smiles wickedly and says, "Of course we're not! We just like wearing this uniform! And now we have a excuse to cause random acts of chaos and continue to make "V" a alligory for Nazi Germany by attacking that Synagogue, to arms my sisters! Schnell! Schnell! Schnell!"

As the Killer Sisters enter the Synagogue they start blasting the walls shouting, "We're Alien Nazi Germany Alligories, so we're going to tear this place apart!" But then a young girl named Jeraldine shows up and says to Tara Killer, "No you're not, you're just a stupid earth girl who tries too hard to be Anti-Semetic and yet you suck at it just by pretending to be a reptilian alien."

The Killers look at Jeraldine and they start crying, Julie then tells her, "NO FAIR! You just had to suck the fun out of being chaotic and destructive!" Jeraldine just conforts them and asks them, "Umm... do you want some chocolate coins?" They just accept them.

"Kasumi" just flies on a craft as she blasts a sign advertising "The Twilight Saga: Eclipse". Kevin sees this and says to Rolf, "You know, those "dorks from outer space" ain't so bad... they hate Twilight too!"

As Ed and Eddy see all this happening, Eddy sees Ed and says, "You know... now that "fourth Ed" is a alien leading an invasion I might as well get this over with just for the fans..." Eddy is about to hug and kiss Ed until they get grabbed by someone and then it turns out to be Double D who tells them, "Before you make this into a slash fanfic for the crazy fangirls I'm here to tell you earthlings that you have hope."

Eddy then asks Double D, "You're one of them too? Since when?" Double D then says, "I was stationed here by my superiors of the "Fifth Column", a group of Visitors who WANT to live among the earthlings in peace along with my partner Willie (played by Jackie Earle Haley) oh and my earth name is "Edd", not "Double D".

Ed then says, "Any proof you're a visitor from uranus?" Edd just pulls off his sockhat and he reveals his gills on his head. Eddy then says, "You kid me not! during that episode "Eeney, Meeney, Miney, Ed", I thought I was making up the whole thing about you having gills on your head! I was right!" Edd then says, "No matter, I surveyed Ed and I noticed his hair contains a rare type of dandruff that once a visitor is exposed to it, it will cause instant death.... Willie why are you rubbing Ed's head? WILLIE!!!

Edd and Eddy see Willie being exposed to to the "red dust" from Ed's head and it causes him to shrivel up and die. Eddy then sees this and says, "Oh geez... well at least we know it works! Let's test it out on the leader and show her that we earthlings have ways of dealing with intergalactic jerks.... no offence Edd!" Edd replies, "Non-taken and I know what you mean!"

As the invasion continues, Fleet Commander Rachel swallows Marie Kanker dressed as a Guinea Pig and Commander "Edna" is then trying to swallow a terror sticken May Kanker dressed as a Guinea Pig. But then Edna sees Ed, Edd, n Eddy and says to them, "So you guys plan to surrender to us huh? I think I'll have my dinner later, my trigger finger is getting itchy!" But then Eddy says, "Oh yeah "lizard breath? Suck on this!" Eddy blows on Ed's head and his dandruff is blown on Edna's face, then Edna shrieks, "OH NO! RED DUST! AAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHH i'm melting! melting! oh what a world! noooooooo"

Rachel then drops her gun and runs off into a Visitor Space craft but ends up crashing into the space craft piloted by the Kimono Siblings.

**(Hours pass by)**

As Edd unleashed the "red dust", he used Visitor technology to spread it around earth to eliminate any visitor on the planet... except for those in the Fifth Column, and it was to ensure that no visitor would ever return to the planet in hopes for more plans for takeover....

**(Ed wakes up from the strange dream)**

Ed then says, "What a weird dream... the "mary sues" are aliens, Eddy tried to kiss me, Double D's an alien and my dandruff saved the planet.... night night! ZzZzZzZzZzZ"

**(The next morning)**

Edna and the Kankers are (still) living with Eddy and Edna makes hot chocolate for them. Then Double D and Ed are invited and they join her too. Without warning, Ed then pulls on Edna's face and she says to him, "ow...ow...oww. HEY! Why did you do that for ya "smurfin' smurf"!" Ed then says, "I thought you were a visitor out to take over Earth and promise us earthlings a healthcare plan!" Edna then rolls her eyes and says, "Ed I thought I told you 4 times already, "V" is just a sci-fi show that is a obvious alligory for the Obama Presidency which is actually a remake of a 1983 sci-fi show that is a obvious alligory for Nazi Germany... it's kinda weird how Anna would keep using words like "Hope" and "Change" in her speeches."

Ed then says, "Well ha! ha! Then that must means Double D or "Edd" isn't a member of the "Fifth Column" and has gills under his hat, we'll just see about that!"

And with that Ed just takes off Double D's hat...

**(Ed takes off Double D's sockhat but a shot of Eddy's house is what the reader can visualize)**

**Ed:** Oops! You really don't have gills under there!

**Edd:** Oh you think! Now Edna and the Kanker Sisters know!

**Eddy**: OH THE HUMANITY!

**Lee Kanker:** My two eyes! They burn!

**Marie Kanker:** I lusted over that?

**May Kanker:** Double D... does it really hurt?

**Edna:** Cool! Wait here while I get my Minolta! Wait till Fangoria Magazine sees this!

Double D then says, "You will do no such thing! Please end this chapter Mr. Technomaru!

_**THE END!**_

Next time: The Male Eds plan on making the Kankers a new trailer for Christmas while Edna, Nazz, and the Kankers rock around the christmas tree!


	27. National Buffoon's Christmas Trailer

**Ed, Edd, Eddy, n Edna**

**エド エッド エディ エドナ**

By Technomaru

Chapter 27: National Buffoon's Christmas Trailer

Note: I do not own Ed, Edd, n Eddy...but "The Fourth Ed" and the Kimono Sisters... and brother is mine! Rachel belongs to Squeaken1 though and the new OC Jennifer belongs to yukimizuno. Don Patch belongs to whoever made "Bobobo-bo Bo-bobo"

This is a spin-off of "The Grim ED-ventures of Ed, Edd, n Eddy". I always wondered what if Edna existed in the "Ed, Edd, n Eddy" canon and...THIS STORY DOES NOT CONTAIN SUPERNATURAL ELEMENTS!

By the time you get this, "Ed, Edd, n Eddy's Big Picture Show" finally aired in America! Oh Christmas happened!

**In memory of**

**Isamu Tanonaka**

**1932-2010**

**you kept your EYE on Kitaro for many years...**

* * *

One day Technomaru and his girlfriend are playing the Wii he got for christmas, but then Edna and Chowder in a toastbuster uniform show up and Edna tells him, so that's why you haven't been working on our stories, you get to your computer mister and you write our next installments!" Chowder then says, 'Yeah! I mean we have to finish the second half of the story!" Don Patch replies, "Yeah and do more wigging out that usual!" And so the author decides to end his hiatus and contiue...

* * *

Eddy was sleeping peacefully in his bed dreaming of christmas... that and getting a huge apple flavored Jawbreaker from Ryoko Kimono. When Eddy wakes up he sees Lee Kanker with a plate. Lee then says to him in a pleasant sounding voice, "Morning sleepyhead, me and Edna made you breakfa... is that a puddle on your sheets?"

Eddy was terrified and shaken at the sight of a Kanker in his house... but then he remembered the reason why they're here for when the Killer Sisters burned down the Kankers' trailer and they had nowhere to go. Edna had to temporarily move with Eddy due to her house needing to be fumigated.

Lee then asks Eddy, "Eddy, we make you breakfast, clean your gutters, re-enact classic Mel Brook movies for your entertainment... and we even played "Clue" with you and the Eds last sunday... why are you still scared of us?"

Edna then shows up and says to Eddy, "Yeah Eddy, why are you still scared of my best friend and her reformed sisters? I mean they're not the Killers or anything."

Eddy stops shivering and says, "You know after spending 5 seasons of our show being hunted, chased, and admired by the Kankers... it kinda leaves me traumatized and scarred for life in a way. Ed got over his fear cuz he's a idiot and cuz you gave him butter toast. Double D got over his fear because he trusted May and felt bad for them because of what happened on Halloween."

Lee then says, "Wow... I'm so sorry Eddy!" Edna then says, "Also I'm here to tell you that my house is ok so I will be moving back to the house soon." Eddy jumps out of bed and grabs her leg while begging her, "Please Edna, don't leave me with them!" Edna then says, "Of course not, May lives with me so she will come with me! Also you need to learn to get along with the Kankers... they are better than the Killers!"

Marie shows up and says, "He Edna, I just got a call from your mom. She says she wants to invite you, her niece, and three friends to come with her." Edna's eyes perk up and she says, "Oh goody! A Christmas get together ok, let's get to the house then... but first Eddy change your clothes! I'll have Lee and Marie wash your pjs and sheets."

**(Edna's house)**

Eddy, Edna, and the Kankers arrive at the house and they see Nazz in her winter gear. She goes up to them and says, "Hi everyone... hot chocolate?" Edna grabs a cup and says, "Hiya cousin! And look! No marshmallows!" Marie grabs a cup and says, "You know Nazz, I was wrong about you, and your hot chocolate is great.

Eddy also notices Double D is making christmas cards while Ed is watching a movie. Nazz tells him, "Oh I invited the two because they have a busy schedual as well... Double D is making and sending christmas cards and Ed is watching... umm what was the movie called?"

Ed then says, "Sweet Zombie Jesus"! Nazz then says, "Umm Ed why are you making a "Futurama" joke?" Ed then says, "No Nazz the horror movie I'm watching is called "Sweet Zombie Jesus", it's about Jesus Christ being resurrected... as a zombie and attacking those who crucified him!" Nazz then asks Edna, "Ok cousin you're a horror movie fan too... do those horror movies have to be THAT sacriligious?" Edna then says, "Well I saw "The Exorcist", "Ruby", "Rosemary's Baby", "The Omen" and it's remake, "Demonic Toys", "Hellraiser", So yeah it looks like filmakers can do a film just about anything just to make a quick buck and scare people at the same time... you know Ed that movie is upsetting Nazz so how about we change the channel to either "Fishbowl 2" or this!"

Edna changes the channel and it shows the remake "Black Christmas" and Ed screams and says, "But Edna, Steve Colbert said that this movie ruined America!" Edna then says, "Well find something a little more festive and suitable for your tastes ok?"

Edna then tells Eddy, "Ok, mom is going to take Cousin Nazz and the Kankers for a girls' christmas get together so you have your friends here in the house." Nazz tells Eddy, "We have drinks in the fridge and a apple pie I saved for you guys. Well pick you guys up something!"

And so as the girls leave the house Eddy waves goodbye to them while Ed watches TV and Double D is still sending cards. Eddy then says, "The coast is clear. Ok guys we got to deal with this Kanker problem." Double D then says, "Eddy! Have you forgotten, we made peace with the Kankers ever since our encounters with the Killers and Marie and Lee made a apithany after being treated horribly by those three... and right after having them live with you for a few days you want them out? Why?"

Eddy then says, "Actually despite the fact that you're a only child YOU try to live in a house full of girls, the bathroom is pretty much occupied at all times, they use up all the bread in the house for toast, and when you try to sleep they have "all nighters" and I try to sleep but I keep hearing the sounds of girls laughing... even when I try to imagine being in the Playboy Mansion it still wouldn't work... it makes me think of the three in bunny outfits.

Ed gets up and says, "Excuse me while I take a break from being stupid... And what are you going to do about it for I don't think Eddward and I would want a part of it.... now my stupidity is back as regularly scheduled... the popcorn you are eating has been peed on...film at eleven!"

Eddy and Double D then look at the popcorn they were eating and look very disgusted.

**(Downtown Peach Creek)**

A very annoyed Santa is doing his job sitting in the "visit Santa Kiosk" and a random little girl kept asking Santa for a Pony. "Santa" then tells her, "I already told you little girls over a hundred times, there is no room for a sleigh for hundreds of ponies for all of ya so have a merry christmas!" May Kanker then jumps on Santa's lap and "Santa" then says, "Oh ho ho ho let me guess little girl you want a pony?" May then says, "No "santy"... I want a Pegasus! And maybe a boyfriend." Santa then says, "Well it can't be as bad as being "Santa" at Juvenile Hall I mean get this, this one girl wanted me to give her sisters "The heads of the Kanker Sisters"... whoever they are!" May is officially freaked out by that comment.

**(Back to the Eds)**

The Eds decide to go to the local junkyard. As Ed and Eddy scourge around the trash Double D then asks Eddy, "Ok Eddy, what are we doing here?" Eddy then says, "Simple Sock-head, we find some parts and built a new trailer for the Kankers, have the Kankers move to that trailer and BAM! My house will be a Kanker-free environment... and I can finally walk around in my underwear and finally cop a squat in piece..." Ed then asks, "Umm Eddy what does "cop a squat" mean?" Eddy then replies, "It means I have to take a shi..."

"...Takke mushrooms! Want one Ed?" Said Double D as he hands Ed a shittake mushroom" Double D continues, "Well I think it would make a great christmas present for them but I think we should leave it to the professionals?"

Suddenly the visuals turn black and white and then Eddy says to Double D in a unusual accent, "Eh shut ya yap ya "chowda-head" and get to work!" Ed then says, "'Soitanly nyuk nyuk nyuk!" Double D then rolls his eyes and plays a violin. Ed picks up a plank of wood but as he turns around he accidentally hits Eddy, Eddy then gets really angry. Eddy then holds his fist in front of Ed and says, "See that?" Ed then says, "Yeah," as he slaps Eddy's hand but then Eddy swings his fist in a circular motion above his head, landing on Ed's head. Ed tries to return the clunk to Eddy but he ends up smacking himself on the head, confused over trying to figure out why his head hurt twice as much.

Double D then wonders, "I wonder if Edna and the girls are having a better time than we are?"

**(Downtown Peach Creek)**

Edna, Nazz and the Kankers are eating at "Burgertime", a fast food restaurant named after a video game and alot healthier than Mcdonalds. As they are done eating, Edna looks up and she sees a missletoe and then looks at May Kanker. Edna then smiles and May looks confused. Then suddenly, Edna kisses May on the lips. May blushes and asks Edna, "Well that was unusual and... what's with that paper? And why did you kiss me?" Edna pulls out a pen and paper and says to May, "Oh, I carry this list of "Fanfic Cliques Technomaru wanted to make fun of" and everytime me or one of us does them, we cross them off. Ok we did "weight gain fetish", "Slash/Yaoi" in the last chapter, "Mary Sues", "Movie Parodies", "Anime Parodies, "TV Show Parodies", Oh there we go... we did "Yuri" so that's crossed off!"

May then looks at Edna and says, "You know Edna... I liked that kiss... can I have another?" Edna then says, "Sorry May but I don't want the readers to think I swing that way, I just did it for the sake of making fun of yuri... but don't worry, I'm sure you'll find a good guy in the future." Marie looks at the list and asks, "M-preg? What is that?" Edna then says in a disgusted tone of voice, "Eww... umm you don't want to know... but since I once caught Ed eat pickles and ice cream that sorta kinda counts so I'll cross that then."

Lee then notices a small orange sun-like creature in blue shoes, selling churros. Lee then says, "Umm Edna, is "crazy crossovers" part of that list of things the author want to make fun of?" Edna then says, "Yeah it is an... OMG is that Don Patch from the hit anime "Bobobo-bo Bo-bobo? Just what is he doing here?" Don Patch then walks towards the girls and says, "Ah I see my fans are happy to see me... well since both my anime AND manga ended I'm forced to sell these (slowly) delicious... yummy... mouth watering... star shaped... wiggin'... Churros!"

Edna's eyes sparkle and she drools a bit, then she jumps on Don Patch and shouts in a Cookie-monster way, "ME WANT CHURROS! NOM NOM NOM NOM" as she eats lots and lots of Churros like a mad woman." Don Patch then sweatdrops and says, "Geez, her wiggin' level is up the wall... it makes me look bad!" May then asks, "Umm Edna aren't you worried about being embarassing due to your love of Churros?" Edna then says, "Can't talk... eating" Lee then says, "Umm you're hispanic right? aren't you worried about being accused of being a stereotype?" Nazz then says, "Forget it Lee... Cousin Edna really loves churros, they're like donuts but shaped like sticks, and once she sees them she pretty much "wigs out"

Don Patch then says to Nazz, "Young girl, your cousin is going to send my Ko Patches to college!" However Lee fails to notice that next to Don Patch is his assisstant "The Splinter", a tiny pink creature with hands on its head. It has no facial features except two dots for eyes, and two flat almost sandle-like feet. Lee then asks "The Splinter" So what are you and what are you up to?" Then "The Splinter" jumps up and Lee shouts at the top of her lungs, "AAAHHH! MY BUTT!" Nazz then says, "Oh geez, it takes a real Bo-bobo fan to get this joke..." But then Nazz sees a guy whose entire body is covered by a giant sheet outside his arms, legs, and a thin strand of hair similar to the depiction of Chinese martial artists. He is about to lift his sheet but Nazz then delivers a round house kick at him and says, "Not this time Serviceman!"

**(Back to the three stoog... Umm I mean the Eds)**

Eddy then affectionately pat Double D on the forehead and then when Double D was least expecting it, Eddy just whacked him full force telling him, "Hey get back to work sock-head!" Double D then tries to poke Eddy's eyes but he puts his hand between his eyes, blocking them. Eddy sticks his tounge out and Ed then tugs on it, Then the three get into a huge fight involving slapping, nose-tweaking, ear-twisting, and "purple nurples".

**(Edna and the girl's time)**

As Nazz's Aunt Marion drives the girls back to the Cul-De-Sac, they are drinking hot-chocolate. Nazz then says, "Ok, who's in the mood for singing? Mostly because the radio is out and we need music." Marie then adds, "Umm how about a NON-christmas song this time, that center kept playing it all day." Edna smiles and says, "I KNOW ONE!"

Then Edna starts singing while May sang vocals:

"I found out long ago,

It's a long way down the Holiday Road

Holiday Road

Holiday Road

Holiday Road

Holiday Road"

(Then the girls start singing)

I've come back long ago

Long way down the Holiday Road

Holiday Road

Holiday Road

Holiday Road

Holiday Road"

**(I hope those "Stooges" end their fight on look the color returned!)**

While the melee of silly violence continues, a muffler falls on Ed's head and it makes him fall on the ground, making him move around in circles going "Woo woo woo woo". Eddy then says, "Get up Ed so I can knock you down again!" Double D then says, "Can you guys stop this "Three Stooges" parody? The slaptick violence and nostalgica is getting us nowhere, now if we start working together, we can get this done soon so how about it?" Ed then smiles and says, "Say goodnight Gracie!" Eddy replies, "Umm... I'll take that as a yes..."

**(5 minutes later)**

Ed, Edd, n Eddy are frozen and encased in ice.

Meanwhile walking into the Junkyard, Sarah, Jimmy, Rachel, and Jenny are trying to get to Jimmy's house but they see something rather unusual in the junkyard.

Jenny looks at the huge block of ice and says, "Oh my... is that Ed?" Sarah then asks, "What is my idiot brother and his friends doing there in such cold winter?" Rachel then playfully konks Sarah's head and says, "Sarah I thought me and Kasumi told you to be nicer to your brother... he looks after you and he actually protected you against "those three" yet you still treat him bad!" Sarah then rolls her eyes and says, "Fine... I'm sorry Rachel... can I still be mean to Eddy?" Rachel then says, "Only when he does something stupid and has it coming... at least Ed knows better!" Jimmy then pulls out a tongs and soon Rachel, Jenny, Sarah, and Jimmy use the tongs to drag the ice-Eds back to the Cul-De-Sac.

As they drag the Eds to Eddy's house due to the fact that he has a hot tub, they run into Johnny 2x4 and Plank as they try to catch snowflakes with their tounges. Johnny then says, "Hi Rachel, did you do that ice sculpture of the Eds... you're forgot Edna!" Rachel replies, "No Johnny, it's really them. I have no idea what they were up to but they got frozen. Wanna help us?"

Johnny then says, "I feel the power of love... it's making me stronger than 10 grinches... plus one!" And with that, Johnny pushes the Ed ice block with ease. As they continued to push, Rachel then says, "Oh hey, isn't that Rolf? What's he doing with his animals?" Rachel, Johnny, Jenny, Sarah and Jimmy see Rolf and his animals as a marching band as Rolf is celebrating his country's bizarre version of Christmas and sings about that country's version of Santa Claus...

"Deep below the dirt and rocks  
There lives the bearded maiden fair  
Whose kitchen pot is bigger than  
Her size of underwear. Hey!

Yeshmiyek who peels the root  
And grinds the sausage with her boot!  
Yeshmiyek who cures the meat  
And stuffs the fruits and sugared beets!  
Yeshmiyek who salts the pork  
And stabs it with her silver fork!  
Yeshmiyek who cuts the cheese  
And gives the loaf of bread a squeeeeze!

(Dramatic)  
But should your chores be never done  
Your feeble arms too weak to toil  
Yeshmiyek will surely come  
And throw you in the pot to boil!

Yeshmiyek who smokes the fish  
And lays a slab on every dish!  
Yeshmiyek who guts the hare  
And seasons it with special care!"

As Rolf and his animals march away, they are followed by a alligator with big lips.

Sarah and Jimmy are confused by what just happened and Rachel just says to them, "If Edna was here, she'd point out that this was obviously one big...

**BIG LIPPED ALLIGATOR MOMENT!"**

They just ignored that and as Johnny 2x4 continued to push the ice block, they made the job so much easier that he managed to get them into the house. As they made it to Eddy's house, and to the count of three, Rachel, Jenny, and Johnny managed to dump the Eds in the hot tub.

(**A hour later)**

The Eds are wrapped in blankets and having their feet soaked in warm water. Ed then says, "Thank you baby sister, Jimmy, Jenny, Rachel, and Rachel's boyfriend!" Johnny then says, "I have a name Ed... c'mon we know eachother for 6 seasons now!' Ed then asks Johnny, "Weren't you one of the original "little rascals"?" Johnny then rolls his eyes.

Rachel then asks Double D, "Umm where's Edna? and the Kankers?" Double D answers, "They went somewhere with Nazz for a Christmas get together and they are supposed to be home soon."

And with that, Nazz, Edna, and the Kankers show up singing "Holiday Road" again, Lee then asks, "Is Eddy having a party and we weren't invited... again?" Rachel then says, "Actually the boys were in the cold and were literally frozen by the cold." Edna then sees the boys recovering and asks, "Ok Eddy, What were you up to this time and would Ryoko approve of it?" Double D then says while shivering, "I...I...I... I'll tell you Edna." Double D then whispers to Edna and she seems shocked and then makes a sarcastic smile on her face, this makes Eddy worried. Before Edna can say anything, Lee, Marie, and May show up to check on the Eds.

Rachel then says, "Well we'll let you guys go, if you want us, we'll be going christmas caroling, c'mon girls... and Jimmy and Johnny. And with that Rachel, Jenny, Jimmy, Sarah, and Johnny leave the room, Ed then asks Johnny, "Umm where's plank?" Johnny then replies, "Well Plank won free tickets to Rio De Janeiro and took Splinter with him. I got a postcard!"

Lee Kanker then says in a very sweet voice, "Hi boys! oh and Eddy, while me and Marie and May went out with Nazz and Edna, we didn't forget about you, so we got you a early christmas present and it's something you'd really like!"

Eddy is so shocked and blushes heavily and then she shapeshifts into a heel, then into a lollipop with the word "sucker" on it, then into a snake with it's belly on the ground, then he morphs into a donkey and then to Bam Margera, and then to Johnny Knoxville. As Eddy morphs into Steve-O he asks Double D, "What's happening to me, why am I shapeshifting into the stereotypical symbols of feeling stupid? As well as the cast of "Mtv's Jackass?"

Edna replies, "I think I can answer for Double D, of all the times you try to get rid of the Kankers, not trusting them, and not respecting them, and you want them to leave your house, they got you something really nice and now you feel like a heel, a sucker, lower than a snake's belly, a donkey, and a jackass... but more than one jackass... you're morphing into Chris Pontius!"

Eddy then morphs into Jason "Wee Man" Acuna and says, "Well how do I stop morphing into jackasses?" Edna then says, "Well just accept the fact that the Kankers don't want to cause anymore harm, be a little more friendly towards them, and be grateful that they are not the Kil..." Lee covers Edna's mouth before she can mention "them".

May and Marie show up with a huge barrel. Eddy is puzzled by this, As Eddy got a closer look, Lee and Marie then end up picking him up and puts him in the barrel. Edna and May were suprised but before they can say anything, Eddy then says, "Hey waitaminute... I recognize that smell and texture... this is a barrel full of... APPLE JAWBREAKERS! JACKPOT!!!"

Lee then says to May and Edna, "Fooled ya huh?" Marie then tells Eddy, "We used most of the money we stole from you in the past and saved enough for a barrel full of your favorite flavored jawbreakers." May then asks Eddy, "Umm want us to get you out of that barrel?" Eddy replies, "Heck no! I'm as happy as a kid in some kind of store!"

Lee then hands Ed and Double D a sack of apple Jawbreakers as well. Edna then says, "Girls, Kankers, my big sister sent me a christmas present but I wonder what it is?" As the male Eds and the Kankers see Edna open her present, she is shocked beyond words and so is Ed... it was a DVD of "Garbage Pail Kids: the complete series" Ed then says, "Cool! You sister knows you well." Edna then says as she does a cute skip, "Yes! Now I finally got a copy of the most obscure 80's cartoon ever! It's obscure because it never got shown on TV."

May then asks Edna, "Garbage Pail Kids? Aren't they the ugly deformed versions of the Cabbage Patch Kids and the cards show them do gross things and it resulted in a movie?" Edna replies, "Yeah them... but according to my sister, the cartoon wasn't as gross as the cards, it was funny!... comes to show that you have to judge something AFTER you see it... some parents made that mistake!"

May then hands Edna a package and she tells her, "Merry Christmas Edna!" Edna opens it and to her suprise it's a "Samurai Pizza Cats" tape and she asks, "How did you know"?" May replies, "I find all sorts of things in Flea Markets Edna and you told me that was your favorite anime that involved animals.

But then the Eds and the Kankers hear all kinds of loud noises outside the house and as they look out the window they see a bunch of construction machines heading towards the Cul-De-Sac and they see that a bulldozer is being driven by Ty Pennington of "Extreme Makeover: Home Edition", also with him are the Kimono Siblings.

Eddy then says, "So that's where they've been this chapter... but what are they doing?"

Ryoko then jumps from the bulldozer along with her brother and sisters. Then she goes up Eddy who is still inside the barrel and asks him, "May I have a apple Jawbreaker please?" Eddy just hands her one and she continues, "Anyway me and my siblings decided to get the sisters a house of their own in our neighborhood, it's the least we can do due to the "K..i...l...l..e...r...S...i...s...t...e...r...s.. incident". Lee then shouts, "A HOUSE! A HOUSE OF OUR VERY OWN! Looks like luck has came our way girls!" The girls see the crew creating a house and May says, "It looks like the ones my barbie used to own... until you two played rought with it!" Marie then says, "I said I was sorry!"

Ryoko then says, "Oh I found a package in front of your door Edna, it's said it's for you and May but it has no address!". Edna opens it and she is shocked and sees Don Patch wearing cat ears and a tail. Edna then says, "Oh no it's you again!" Don Patch then says, "What do you mean? I demand attention now that my anime and manga ended! I can has cheezeburger?" May picks him up and says, "I dunno but he's kinda cute... hey and what's that in the box next to him?" May opens it and sees a tiny white creature with a pointy head with a ball attached to his head. He pulls out grilled tofu on sticks and says "We'll make 'em eat grilled tofu dipped in miso on a stick... wanna be friends?" The creature's name is Dengakuman.

May's eyes are wide in a cute way and she glomps the little guy and says, "He's so adorable! Can we keep him?" Edna then says, "First off these guys are anime characters and supposed to be from the future, how did they end up here?" Don Patch then replies, "Umm... a wizard did it?" Ryoko then says, "Well before we end up creating another

**BIG LIPPED ALLIGATOR MOMENT**

Let's just ignore this bizarre crossover even happened... how about you throw a party at your new house Lee?" Lee replies, "I dunno, can I?"

**(Later that night)**

Sure enough the Kimonos hosted a Christmas party at the Kankers' new house and everyone (even Kevin) was invited. Kevin then asks Kasumi, "Umm why was I invited, I'm a minor antagonist in this fanfic?" Kasumi then replies, "Well it wouldn't seem right not to.. also you're not as bad as those three girls who's names make anyone in this room shiver in fear." Kevin replies, "Good point."

Despite skipping his scene, Don Patch is running around the house like the party animal he is.

Eddy ends up drinking more than 3 cups of eggnog and starts telling jokes to his friends, "Hey guys, here's another one... You know when you've been drinking way too much Coffee when Juan Valdez named his donkey after you. Oh I got one my brother told me... the top 10 things you never say to a police officer!

1. Are you Andy or Barney?

2. Do you know why you pulled me over? Okay, just so one of us does.

3. I thought you had to be in good physical condition to be a police officer.

4. Sorry, Officer, I didn't realize my radar detector wasn't plugged in.

5. I pay your salary!

6. Aren't you the guy from the Village People?

7. Hey, you must've been doing' about 125 mph to keep up with me. Good job!

8. You're not gonna check the trunk, are you?

9. Gee, Officer! That's terrific. The last officer only gave me a warning, too!

10. I was trying to keep up with traffic. I know there are no other cars around. That's how far ahead of me they are."

May laughs and says, "I haven't laughed this hard since that time me and Edna was watching that comedian who yelled all the time on her older sister's tape... what was his name? I know it wasn't Gilbert Godfried." Edna then rolls her eyes and says, "It's Sam Kinison... and I had no idea he was going to be that vulgar... but he was right about that rap music!"

Ryoko then rolls her eyes at Eddy's jokes. Eddy then walks up to Ryoko who was drinking hot chocolate in the huge dining table and says to her, "Ryoko... I notice that despite your name you rarely act like your namesake... why is that and why do you want me to act all gentlemanlike and such, you know I can't ever give up scamming and I don't even look good in a monkeysuit!"

A tear falls from Ryoko's eye and she says, "Eddy my love, I knew one day you would ask me this... but I think Kasumi is the right person to explain it to you." Soon enough Kasumi shows up and says, "You might be Ryoko is the tomboyish yet proper Kimono Sister... well there is more to her than this and I have a photo album to prove it.

Eddy looks at the photo album and laughs as one photo shows her next to a wet futon and Kasumi then says, "Oops! You weren't supposed to see that! I mean here! This is her when she was 7... my sister would act rather wild just by the sip of that special drink called "special tea". Then she would run around the house naked, perform scams that really work, give kids at school wet willies, forced them to eat "mud pies", you name any immature act she did it... and drinking "special tea" while doing all those things! but then one day..."

Ryoko is drinking "special tea" from Kasumi's favorite cup, then she was caught and accidentally drops the cup, smashing it. Ryoko then seems scared and says, "I'm sowwy."

But then Kasumi has a semi-stern look on her face and says, "Sorry but you've been bad" and with that Kasumi just a little flick on her forehead. Ryoko starts crying and hugs Kasumi as Kasumi explains the rest, "Ryoko I know you are the youngest of us triplets but this gives you no excuse to be such a "heckion", that's why you have a lack of friends and not invited to parties so if you want guests for your "girls day" on March 3rd, I suggest you change your ways...oh and "special tea" isn't the type of drink little girls like ourselves shouldn't drink."

Ryoko then nods and hugs Kasumi again and says, "I'll try to be a good girl and make sure I gets lots of friends by March 3rd!" Kasumi then pats her head and Ryoko goes out and make something out of herself...and she will not take "Jackass" as the answer.

So eventually Ryoko made friends and had the best "Girls' day" ever and used the money she scammed to pay for all the food in the party and she swore off "special tea" if it means being liked by all.

Ryoko then says, "Yes, it took Kasumi to show me the light and now I'm among the most popular girls in Japan and Eddy... I want you to change your ways or else you will be lonesome and friendless... it's probably why none of the Cul-de-sac kids liked you at first, save the other two Eds. But then Edna became your friend but you still do stuff like that, until those times those "sisters" attacked you guys now and then.

Eddy then says, "Ryoko... you really care about me and you don't want me to be a miserable lowlife...well because I love you and the last time I acted like myself I saw a disgusting movie so... I promise not to scam unless the fans want me to. Ryoko makes a big smile and glomps Eddy, then she giggles and says, "Hey Eddy, wanna shock some of our friends and be satisfied by it?"

So she grabs Eddy and both of them go inside a closet and instead of kiss and make up they were "kissing and making out"....

Ed hears the sounds and says, "Ryoko really is a demon, she's eating Eddy's face!" Kasumi replies, "No she's not... they just like eachother like how I like you!"

Ryoko then asks Eddy, "Can you quit scamming as a New Year resolution?" Eddy sweats and replies, "I'll think about it"

**NEXT TIME: Can Eddy NOT scam as a resolution and is it possible for Edna to find a boyfriend for May? find out next time Ed-heads!"**


	28. Eddy and May's tales

**Ed, Edd, Eddy, n Edna**

**エド エッド エディ エドナ**

By Technomaru

Chapter 28: Eddy's scamless day, May's quest for love!

Note: I do not own Ed, Edd, n Eddy...but "The Fourth Ed" and the Kimono Sisters... and brother is mine! Rachel belongs to Squeaken1, Jennifer belongs to yukimizuno and the new OC Joe belongs to Votrongo at his request. Don Patch belongs to whoever made "Bobobo-bo Bo-bobo"

This is a spin-off of "The Grim ED-ventures of Ed, Edd, n Eddy". I always wondered what if Edna existed in the "Ed, Edd, n Eddy" canon and...THIS STORY DOES NOT CONTAIN SUPERNATURAL ELEMENTS!

By the time you get this, I am a Ebay junkie, Youtube junkie and a Wii junkie XD oh and Disneyland IS GOING TO BRING BACK "CAPTAIN EO!"

* * *

**(New Years Day)**

It was a cold winter day and it's now 2010. The kids are out in the snow but it's time for Eddy to wake up and seize the day.

As Eddy is about to put on his clothes, he sees Lee and Marie Kanker making giggles at him for their house is right next to his and they can see his room through the window. Eddy shakes but then he smirks and then he lifts his shirt and says "HAPPINESS PUNCH! Now you owe me $10 for seeing my pecs!" But he sees Lee and Marie screaming in fear and she twitters something on her phone and Eddy picks up his phone and sees a message on it. It reads,

"Actually you owe us $10 for showing us your "moobs", now excuse me while I wash my eyes and swear off perving on you."

Eddy is offended and then he thinks to himself, "Forget those two, It's a new day and I should try to scam as much as I can without Ryoko, Edna, and the others from knowing, but first I should do something about my "moobs" anyway!"

So he does his daily exercise routine... He puts on a CD entitled "Chi Chi Wo Moge" by Parco Fulgore and then he starts singing and dancing to the song...

"chi-chi-chi-chi oppai boing boing!  
chi-chi-chi-chi oppai boing boing!  
moge moge moge!"

Eddy then says to himself "If anyone finds out I like this song and dance to it every morning, I'd be in huge trouble... especially with Ryoko Kimono" But then Ryoko shows up and says "Umm Eddy, what exactly were you singing?" And then Eddy says "Uh..uh...

"Hey Hey Let's dance all day! boing boing!

Hey Hey Let's dance all day! boing boing!

boogie boogie boogie!"

Ryoko then says "No I heard what you were singing Eddy, but at least you're trying to be cute." Eddy then says, "So Ryoko what brings you here and how did you get inside the house?" Ryoko then replies, "Simple Eddy... you forgot to lock the door... again!" Eddy then blushes red and says, "Oh geez, I know I got dumber in the third season of the show but I can't be that dumb!" Eddy then shapeshifts into Steve-O and Ryoko laughs and replies, "Oh now I get it, whenever you feel like a idiot instead of turning into suckers or a cartoon donkey that represents feeling like a jackass... you turn INTO a member of the Jackass crew. Anyway after you shapeshift back to your normal self I just get the feeling that you're gonna do something really stupid without me watching you and...well... (cries) I think I should give you a choice...

**GIVE UP SCAMMING OR YOU'LL NEVER SEE ME AGAIN!!!**

Your Scamming has caused nothing but trouble, shame, and dishonor to us all and I wish that you give up scamming or give me up! You even told me that was your New Year's resolution was to give it up, just like when the author gave up soda for a year.

Eddy then shivers and shakes and then Eddy says "But I'm Eddy Skipper (last name unknown), I ALWAYS scam!..." Ryoko then says "Remember this... if you lose me... You will run wild and end up in the gutter... That and that one Killer Sister who wants you would stalk you to the end of time... plus scamming makes you no better than those savages... do you want "Juvie" to be your new home?

Eddy then sweats heavily to the point where he puts a towel on his head and then he says... I CAN'T WIN!!! (hugs Ryoko) I WILL PROMISE TO WORK HONESTLY AND NOT DISHONESTLY, I WILL GIVE UP SCAMMING IF IT MEANS KEEPING YOU! PLEASE DON'T LEAVE ME FOREVER!" Ryoko smiles and says "Now was it that hard? Now that you gave up scamming for our sake and for a new year together... I'm going back to the house for some videos of us so we can watch them together.

Eddy then says "Yeah... right...give…up..." Ryoko then says "Oh and I know about the monkey on your back and it's gonna make you scam... So I told our friends to prevent you from doing so... I WOULD LIKE TO SEE YOU GIVE IT UP FOR MORE THAN 24 HOURS!!!" MAY I REMIND YOU THAT THOSE WHO SCAM... THEY GO TO JUVIE! WANNA GO THERE... THEN GIVE UP SCAMMING...(soft cute voice) pweese?"

Eddy then says while twitching "Ok... I'll try possibly NOT to scam. Now excuse me I got some reflecting to do!" Ryoko, who is just watching Eddy then walks away and then she pulls out a cellphone and says, "Hey... it's Ryoko, make sure we can break his nasty habit!"

As Eddy then goes to the park and lies on the grass, he then twitches and then Johnny 2x4 goes up to him and says "Hi Eddy, Plank wants to buy "the Park N Flush trailer park"…oh that's right, Ryoko told Rachel and she told me that you gave up scamming…."

Eddy then twists, shakes, shivers, foams in the mouth and then he yells out at the reader, "WHY DID I QUIT SCAMMING FOR? I LIKE SCAMMING! I'M NO QUITTER! I GET ALOT OF PLEASURE SCAMMING! I LOVE SCAMMING! IT'S MY HOBBY!" Eddy then Babbles crazily and then jumps up and screams "YOW! SCAM! SCAM! SCAM! SCAM! SCAM!"

Eddy plans to do a global diet pyramid scam online but he finds himself to be computer illiterate, so he runs off and puts a baby mouse in a bottle of "Mug Root Beer" hoping he can get free root beer off of it but then the factory had a sign that reads "THOSE WITH MICE INSIDE BOTTLES ARE NOT ILLIGABLE FOR FREE ROOT BEER" Eddy then says "DRAT!" Eddy then goes to a "Wendy's" planning to put a fake finger in a bowl of chili in order to get money out of this but then he sees yet another sign, this time preventing fingers in chilis. Eddy then goes up to Sarah and Jimmy and says "I'm selling Volcano Insurance!" Sarah then points at a active volcano and she says "BAKA!" Eddy then puts a cat inside a sack and tries to sell it off to Rolf as a pig but then when he gets to Rolf, the cat rips through the sack and attacks Eddy. Eddy then goes to his house and tries to duplicate MP3s but then his computer shuts down for no apparent reason and it gets him to go out again for more attempts at scamming.

Eddy then sees Marie Kanker with a basket of flowers and he screams "AAAHHHH! A KANKER!" Marie gets angry and says "HOW MANY TIMES DO I HAVE TO TELL YOU? I'M NOT GOING TO HURT YOU! Oh right, you're afraid of girls…what's wrong?" Eddy then shivers and shakes and then he runs away and then jumps on Marie's back screaming "RAGGLE FRAGGLE!" while picking bugs out of her hair like a monkey Marie then says "Did you get into the cough syrup again? Double D isn't going to be happy when he finds out!"

Eddy then picks up a tries to scam some nuts from squirrels but then Marie grabs him by the arm and she tells him, "I see you're trying to scam, Ryoko warned me about you…" Eddy then says "I NEED TO SCAM!!! SCAM! SCAM! SCAM! SCAM! SCAM!!!! Eddy then sees a donkey that's just lying down and he says "If I have to…" Marie stands in front of Eddy as he yells "YOU KANKERS ALWAYS RUIN MY SCAMS!" May then says "Actually due to standards and practices, I won't allow you to do anything to that donkey so…" Eddy pushes her away and then as he dashes towards the donkey, the donkey kicks him in the "lil Eddy" and he flies towards a laptop that appears out of nowhere and he says "THAT'S IT, I'LL PERFORM A INTERNET SCAM!!!" But then Eddy sees a "Where's Wally" game on the computer, he then says "Hmmm… I see Odlaw but where's Wally? But then suddenly a image of Julie Killer appears and he hears loud screaming, Eddy then screams and he is close to having a heart attack because he fell for a "prank flash".

Ryoko and Marie then stand next to him and he says "So Eddy, did u scam today?' Eddy then says "No but I saw the most ugliest thing I've seen next to Regan from "The Exorcist"…" Ryoko then hugs Eddy and says "YAY!" Eddy then spazes out and when Eddy realizes something... Eddy then asks Ryoko and Marie, "Where did the laptop and the donkey come from?

**EDDY'S STORY WILL CONTINUE NOW HERE'S MAY'S SIDE OF THE STORY…**

Edna wakes up and she's wearing her purple "feetie" pajamas. Then she sees May in her blue "feetie" pajamas and they both share a giggle. Edna then asks May, "Well since your sisters now live in a house and not in that trailer why don't you live with them... I'm just curious and someone else might ask you before I can."

Don Patch then says, "Hey May! Why don't you live with your sis... I think I should leave now!" Then he slips away. May replies, "Well I like this environment and I cannot bear to think what would 15 minutes be like without you, you're the bestest thing that's ever happened to me since the invention of the DVD player." Edna blushes and says, "Wow... no one's ever said anything like that to me before... Oh my I just remembered, Kitaro wants to meet me at the park... you can come with me if you like, I haven't forgotten about my resolution... get you a boyfriend!"

May then asks Edna, "Umm Edna, you're not planning to fix me up with James from the episode "This won't hurt a Ed" are you? Eddy tried that." Edna then replies, "Nope! I want to help you find a guy who is just right for you... oh and by the way, James' mom often clashes my mom and aunt during their weekly Mah-jong game.

As Ed and Double D were looking for Eddy in the Cul-De-Sac. Edna and May show up and Edna asks them, "Hi guys, what's up?" Ed then replies…THE SKY!" Edna looks up and May just giggles. Double D then informs Edna, "Actually we're looking for Eddy, Ryoko told us he's supposed to quit scamming and we get the feeling that he's going..." Ed interrupts Double D and shouts, "INSANE IN THE MEMBRANE!"

Edna then laughs and says, "You do that while I get to the park, my prince awaits for me! let's go May!" As the two go to their destination, May sees a rabbit and starts chasing it. She manages to catch it but it turns out to be Don Patch in rabbit ears, May is confused by this but then she hears someone on the other side of the fence. She sees what appears to be a hispanic boy her and Edna's age and he is singing to himself, he is singing "Haven't met you yet" by Micheal Buble".

May thinks to herself, "Hey that's one of the songs on Edna's sister's CDs. But how can I get him to notice me?"

May then turns deep red and turns away from the guy. The kid hears something but then excused it as the wind. May then runs into Edna as Edna says to her, "Whoa May why is your face red? Did you encounter shellfish or something?" May replies, "Umm no..." Kitaro is with Edna and says, "Hello Edna, I brought a basket Kasumi prepared for our picnic.

Edna and Kitaro are eating Yakitori and mocchi. May then sits on the corner of the blanket. Kitaro then tells May, Umm May, Kasumi made enough for all of us, try some mocchi!"

Edna sits next to May and asks her, "Umm what's wrong May? You normally act like this when you think you see a certain celebrity you like."

(Cutaway begins)

Edna and May are going to the "Flynn's Arcade" in Downtown Peach Creek but then May sees a bunch of boys who are not seen by the reader and keeps saying, "OMG IT'S ZAC EFRON! OMG IT'S ZAC EFRON! OMG IT'S ZAC EFRON! Zac Efron? What are you doing here?"

Zac Efron then says to May Kanker, "Well I'd thought I'd find a good place to... umm are you Ashley Tisdale? OMG IT'S ASHLEY TISDALE! OMG IT'S ASHLEY TISDALE! OMG IT'S ASHLEY TISDALE!" As Edna and May see Zac Efron mistaking unseen girls for Ashley Tisdale, Edna then says to May, "And now you know why I have no part in this "High School Musical" fad."

(Cutaway ends)

Edna then continues to look at May and Kitaro then says to Edna, "I've seen this type of behavior... On the day we met, Ryoko acted sorta like this when you four were knocked out when we found you outside our home. It's love... I think May found someone she likes.

Edna then replies, "But what can we do to give May the confidence to be with this person she likes?" Kitaro then grins as he came up with a idea.

(Soon)

Kitaro then hands May Kanker $10 and tells her, "Here's your cash now go to the boy!" Edna looks at Kitaro in a odd way and he says to her, "Umm didn't one of you kids always did something for that much money in the neighborhood?" Edna then slaps her head and says, "No, that's Eddy, May isn't motivated by money at all... who gave you that idea?" Kitaro then says, "Well it has been a few months me and my sisters moved here so I'm still trying to get the hang of who's who in the Cul-De-Sac."

Edna and May then look at eachother and May says to her and Kitaro, "So you guys know I have a crush on the new kid? And can I keep the $10?"

Edna and Kitaro then look at eachother and Kitaro softly says to May, "..... yes... yes you can!"

**NOW EDDY AND MAY'S STORIES WILL CROSS TOGETHER AND RESULT IN ONE HAPPY ENDING…**

Eddy, Ryoko and Marie are walking in the streets looking for whoever owned the laptop and donkey. As hope is lost, Eddy then asks the girls, "Umm if we don't find whoever owns the two, do I get to keep the laptop and sell the donkey to a glue factory?"

The donkey hears this and angerly kicks Eddy as he rolls down the hill. Marie then looks at the donkey and says to Ryoko, "Now that is one bad as...." Ryoko shouts out, "Shut your mouth!" Marie then continues, "But I was talking about the donkey! He is technically a bad ass!" Ryoko then says, "I can dig it... now let's get my boyfriend out of this jam!"

Eddy continues to roll down the hill, Don Patch manages to dodge him and soon enough, Eddy accidentally crushes the boy May crushed on as he continues to roll downhill.

As Edna, Kitaro, and May continue their picnic, May suddenly ends up being ran over by Eddy and continues being rolled down the hill. The boy then sees May who just suddenly blushes and he says to her, "Umm did I suddenly die already because I see a angel right in front of me." May blushes heavily and makes unusual noises with her nose as she giggles.

Soon Eddy, the kid, and May end up crashing into a tree, Eddy gets knocked out while the kid and May get out of this unharmed. Then the boy and May look at eachother and while May blushes and the boy says to her, "Hi I'm Joe and you're cut... Umm I mean I just moved here."

Soon the two look at eachother while Eddy then gags at the sight. Marie and Ryoko show up and Ryoko gets Eddy up and asks him, "Eddy are you alright and..." Marie notices Joe kissing May and asks Ryoko, "Umm I think we're interrupting something here."

Ryoko then asks Joe, "Ummm does this laptop and this donkey belong to you?" Joe smiles and says, "Why yes they do, I was looking for them then all of a sudden that boy bumped into me and I bumped into...into... her.... say I never got your name what was it?"

May blushes deep red and replies, "It's May... May Kanker"

The two then look at eachother lovingly and before Eddy can say anything Joe then reaches in his pocket and pulls out a dollar telling him, "This is for returning my laptop and my donkey.... and a extra 10 dollars for fixing me up with the girl o' my dreams."

Eddy looks at the 11 dollars in glee and he says, "Well slap me around and call me Ivy!" Ryoko slaps Eddy and says to him, "Hey Ivy, it looks like you made big money and you didn't even scam!" Eddy then says, "Yes I did... JAWBREAKERS FOR EVERYONE!"

As the two couples, Eddy, Ryoko and Marie are walking to the candy store, they see Lee Kanker with Double D. Edna then asks Lee and Double D, "Hi guys, how's it going?" Lee then says, "Well we went to Juvinile Hall to make sure... "they" don't try anything to escape or find ways to be let out through good behavior." Double D then adds, "Yeah but the last time we saw the Killer Sisters, they are about to be beaten up by all the gangs they ever fought, "the Lizzies", "the Orphans", "the Softball Furies", and the "Crazy Eights".

Edna then says, "Well whatever happens to the Killer Sisters, they've had it coming!" Double D then says in a scared voice, "Actually the Killers were sent to solitary confinement for actually beating them all up again, I have no idea where they keep their broken bottles." Marie then says, "The next thing I know, they're probably composing a "Villian Song". Double D then replies, "Yes they are... I think they called it, "I got friends on the other side in the dark of the night"." Marie just shivers when she heard the answer.

Lee then sees May with Joe and asks Edna, "Who's the boy who is sucking May's face?" Edna smiles and says, "I believe May finally found a boyfriend, huh what was that Joe? Looks like he likes anime and 80's music too!" Lee then says, "So basically... May's dating a male version of you?" Edna then replies, "Mmmm yep! Now let's go the candy store, Eddy somehow got money and wants to use it for us!

And so May got her boyfriend, Eddy got money without scamming, and the Killer Sisters are still in "Juvie"... BUT FOR HOW LONG?

Don Patch then shows up and says, "This isn't the last you'll see of me Ed-heads! As long as my anime and manga ended, THE CUL-DE-SAC IS MY HOME YAHOO!"

**NEXT TIME: The one non-canon crossover you least expect... EEEnE vs the Biji Biji fruit characters in a game of Hockey... expect some silliness in the rink! Technomaru and Emma Iveli join forces in a fanfic... again!**


	29. Hockey Game!

**Dream Crossover Hockey Game: Ed, Edd, Eddy, n Edna vs Biju Biju Fruits**

**エド エッド エディ エドナ**

By Technomaru and Emma Iveli

Chapter 29: What are ya looking at ya Hockey Puck?

Note: This is a spin-off of "The Grim ED-ventures of Ed, Edd, n Eddy". I always wondered what if Edna existed in the "Ed, Edd, n Eddy" canon and...THIS STORY DOES NOT CONTAIN SUPERNATURAL ELEMENTS! And has no connection to their baseball game.

Note: I definately do not own the characters here except for Edna the fourth Ed the Kimono Siblings and the Killer Sisters, other characters from Emma's fanfics like Usa and Ko appear here!

This chapter took alot of weeks of planning... and yes there is a villian named after someone who is a total jerk irl and no it's not just the Killer Sisters...

**THIS CHAPTER IS NOT CONSIDERED CANON AND IT CONTAINS NUMEROUS SPOILERS TO "ONE PIECE"**

Emma herself has explained what her fanfic "The Biju Biju Fruit is all about:

"The Biju Biju Fruit, an alternate One Piece Story, with the Naruto crew inserted. Not only does it follow 5the One Piece story but some added things: Within the world there are warriors known as Clone Users, these clone user can multiply themselves in many ways, the top 10 Clone User are the 10 Kages, The Hokage, the Namikage, the Otokage, the Kazekage, the Mizukage, the Tsuchikage, the Raikage, the Hoshikage, the Yukikage and the Tsukikage.

Fox D. Naruto, the younger brother of Monkey D. Luffy dreams of becoming a Kage. The Straw Hats also now include Uchiha Sasuke, Zoro's former bounty hunter and younger brother to Kuina a swords man and martial artist, Sakura, Nami's former thieving partner who's parents were killed by Arlong… she's also super strong, Kiba, Usopp's slightly more mature younger brother who's also a clone user, Akamaru, Kiba's cute and cuddly pet dog, Ino, a girl who lost her memories at a young age and grew up at the Baratie with Sanji, she also ate the Soul Soul Fruit which allows the user to posses other people, Hyuga Hinata a girl who grew up with Naruto and Luffy and is in love with Naruto, she's also a user of the Gentle Fist and Gaara, the newest member who has the evil demon the Ichibi no Shikaku that allows him to control sand at the cost of never being able to sleep.

Along the Straw Hat's Journey they encountered four Kages so far, Hatake "Orange Book" Kakashi, the current Namikage and make out paradise fanatic, Tsunade "The Legendary Sucker" the current Hokage, a doctor that raised Chopper (who replaced Dr. Kureha in this story). Mitarashi "The Crazy (bleep)" Anko the current Otokage and crazy (bleep) as the name implies and Nii "Fire Cat" Yugito, the holder of the demon Nibi no Nekomata and the curretn Raikage, (there's also the Kazekage but they didn't meet him or learn his name... because he's dead). Naruto is also no ordinary boy sealed inside him is the greatest of all Biju the legendary Kyubi no Yoko, a powerful (and perverted) fox demon and with the power of the Biju Biju Fruit allows him to transform into Kyubi. That is the story of the Biju Biju Fruit… oh yeah… one more thing: for some reason Zabuza replaced Higuma… I don't know what I was thinking when I wrote that… I was crazy!"

To my biggest fan, close friend, Cupid in a sailor fuku, and supportive otaku... THANK YOU!

NOW LET THE GAME BEGIN!

**IN MEMORY OF**

**Edward "Whitebeard" Newgate**

**and**

**Portgas D. A...**

Edna: Hey no spoilers!

* * *

This game is brought to you by "4KIDS brand cookies", cookies so good you'll say "Hey you son-of-a-(bleep) those are riceballs!"

Then the game is presented by the announcers, The stars of Emma Iveli's fanfics, but mostly "The Rabbit and the Cat", her very own Gi Usa and Kone Ko. Usa is a teenage girl with rabbit ears, wearing a white sun hat with a pink ribbon around it and wore a pink sundress. Ko is a teenage girl with short blue hair and cat ears, wearing a blue baseball cap, purple shirt, and jean shorts.

Ko then announces into the mic, "Hello again sports fans! This is a rare opportunity that when two fanfic writers combine forces and what better way than to play a game of Hocky! However due to the time the writer spent due to his job and writer's block, the location of the game is located in Nagano, Japan." Usa then says, "Japan? but isn't that where all the monsters live?" Ko then says, "... Anyway let's check out the crowds, oh look it's the Kimono Siblings, apparently all four Eds are dating them, lucky dogs! Also I see Rachel, Johnny 2x4, Jenny, Rolf, and Sarah of Peach Creek. I see Supernova Jewlery Bonney harassing a pizza vendor, they don't call her "big eater" for nothing, oh what's this? Another Supernova "Trafalgar Law" and the heart pirates are there too." Ko then adds, "Aww he has a bear how cute... umm did Mr. Law just flip off the camera? What the... Scratchmen Apoo is our DJ? Looks like some of the Supernovas are here except for Capone Bege, X. Drake, Basil Hawkins, and the Kidd Pirates... better this way... I wonder where the Marines are?

Nami then informs Luffy and Naruto that the Eds aren't the same group of Eds with the Grim Reaper from that other fanfic.

Well anyway we'll start this game by announcing the team players in this match up!

The Four Eds

Edna (Don't mess with the best!)

Ed as the goalie (Ch ch ch... ha ha ha! I am Jason Voorhees!)

Eddy (I hear players get paid heavily from this!)

Jimmy (My dad is making me play... I swear!)

Nazz (Did I mention I'm good at Hockey?)

Marie Kanker (Let's do this!)

Cheerleaders: May, Rachel, and Lee

Supply Manager: Double D

Usa: And I use will introduce the next team...

The Biju Biju Fruits

Fox D. Naruto (Believe it!)

Monkey D. Luffy (I'm going to be King of the Pirates!)

Zoro (...)

Gaara (...)

Sanji (Let's serve them a can of whoopa...)

Usopp (I'm a better player than Wayne Gretzki!) as the goalie (Whaa? Why am I a goalie?)

Due to a technicallity, Sasuke will not be playing on the team because of the rampant fangirls that keep stalking him and ruining the games.

Cheerleaders: Nami, Sakura, and Hinata

Their mascot is the one character who would be Canadian in real life... Chopper the reindeer!

Referee: Don Patch ?!?

Ko then says, "Ok and now we start the game with a national anthem, but since our budget doesn't cover "Weird" Al Yankovic's appearance, we might as well skip the anthem and play the game!

Ok, the game begins, Edna and Nazz are double teaming, hitting the puck to the other side towards a rather fearful Usopp, but then they are thwarted by Luffy and Naruto, As they go to the other side, Ed pretends he's Jason and he appears to be attacking Naruto with a knife as Luffy hits the puck at the goal Ed is supposed to protect. It turns out that Ed is using a fake retractable knife to "attack" Naruto. Naruto looks at Ed and says to him, "Looks like you watch way too much horror movies!"

Usa then narrarates, "As Sanji kicks the puck, it seems to hit Ko's head... oh no not again!" Ko then sees birds flying around her head and says in a daze "Pretty birdies... take me away from this bad place!" Ko then says, "Looks like Ko has gone bye bye now... until she comes to here's her brief replacement Chester A. Bum!"

Chester A. Bum from guywithglasses dot com shows up and shouts, "OH WOW THIS IS THE GREATEST MOVIE IN MY LIFE...umm it's not a movie... OH WOW THIS IS THE GREATEST FANFIC IN MY LIFE...(even though I am illiterate)... It's about four friends and their names are Ed but there is a girl and her name is Ed only it's "Ed-na"...I HAVE A FRIEND NAMED ED WHO IS A GIRL (and she is a rat) Anyway they are now friends with three former mean girls named the Kanker Sisters... I HAVE A KANKER SORE! (and it's on my butt)... So they're like going against Pirates-ninjas from the land of makebelieve....I'VE BEEN IN THE LAND OF MAKE BELIEVE! (only when I do drugs) so they play Hockey in Nagano Japan and play to find out who is awesomer and (I personally like the Eds because because they are someone I can relate to) But the pirate ninjas have superpowers and stuff, I HAVE SUPERPOWERS TOO, (I can shrink myself and live in a can) So this is Chester A. Bum saying, "CHANGE? YOU GOT CHANGE? c'mon help a guy out Change! it's either that or shrink myself to enter a bank safe with my pirate ninja superpower!"

Usa is freaked out by Chester A. Bum that she says, "Roll a commercial!"

**(Commercial begins)**

Two kids were bored and hungry. "I'm hungry." Said one of the kids. "That can be fixed." Said a voice with a Russian accent. The kids turned around and saw a girl that resembled Haruhi Suzumiya. "Haruhikov Dekovitch!" said the two kids happily. "That's right kids." Said the girl named Haruhikov, "Remember to eat my Waffles!" "Hey what are you doing!" yelled another voice. Haruhikov turned around and saw Haruhi Suzumiya herself. "It's you!" aid Haruhikov. "That's it you're going down you imitation!" yelled Haruhi. The two began to fight, punches were thrown, hair was pulled kicks were um… kicked… and it was all ended when an anvil fell on Haruhikov. "That was weird." Said one of the kids. "Where did that anvil come from." Said the other kid. "I don't know…" said Haruhi who began to get existed, "But it must be a mystery that the S.O.S Bridge must solve!" "And now a message from the S.O.S Brigade" said an announcer. Kyon, Mikuru, Yuki and Itsuki all stood on a stage. "Remember kids… don't ever imitate Haruhi… bad seemingly unexplainable things happen." Said Kyon with the other three members nodding in agreement.

**(Commercial ends)**

Nami, Ino, and Hinata continue to cheer on as Eddy stares at them and soon Sanji unexpectedly rams into him. Sanji gives Eddy a look that tells him, "You have no right to stare at them short guy!" And as Eddy and Sanji fight eachother, Jimmy manages to hit the puck and it strikes the goal, giving another point for the four Eds. Marie and Nazz then switch the puck back and forth and uh oh they seem to be running towards Zoro and Gaara, a sandstorm appears briefly, oh wait it cleared up... oh I see that Marie and Nazz lost track of the puck and Zoro successfully shot it to the goal! Now Luffy's hitting the puck and just before he can hit the goal, Luffy then sees Buggy and his crew in the stands and it destracts Luffy long enough for Edna to hit the puck and score for her team.

Edna then sees Buggy and says, "Meh" Nazz and Marie skate to her and Nazz then says to Edna, "Cousin Edna? Why aren't you scared of Buggy?" Buggy then goes up to Luffy, Nazz, Marie and Edna and tells them, "I just want to let you know I'm not here to fight Straw Hat, I'm here to enjoy this game... I FLASHINGLY LOVE HOCKEY! I also get the feeling that if I leave "Straw Hat" alone he might help me in the event I end up in some jail or something."

Edna then adds, "Well Cousin Nazz I'm not scared of Buggy because as One Piece progresses he is nothing more than a idiot." Buggy then replies, "Yes I know I can be a idiot at times.....WHAT DID YOU SAY?!? I'LL FLASHINGLY KILL YOU!" Nazz then holds Buggy back and tells him, "Umm... Mr. Buggy, my cousin is normally a coulrophobic and if she saw you as a normal clown she'd wet herself in fear but since she sees you as some sort of a idiot but not a big one like Spandam of course, then she won't be scared of you so you got it? I'll give you a Mars bar if you make peace with Edna!"

Buggy then eats the Mars bar and says, "Well.... ok! I'm willing to flashingly make peace with the "ugly" girl." And with that, Buggy's hand flies to Edna and she shakes it. Edna just laughs at bit and replies, "Cousin Nazz is right, you're much smarter than Spandam!"

Usa then says, "And now it's time for the Half-Time show...HALF TIME! THERE'S NO HALF TIME IN HOCKEY! Who sent us the script that says there is one?" Ko then looks outside and shivers in fear as she shouts, "LOOK!"

The sky turns dark and a float arrives into the rink, it rises into the shape of a mountain and it glows red and green. Rising from a door are the hooded members of the WG cult and football players known as the Lemon Brook Lumpers, however they are no wearing hoods and carry pitchforks.

Edna sees this and says to Luffy and Naruto, "Oh no... not them... anyone but them... I'd wished it was Buggy than them!" Buggy the Clown shows up and asks Edna, "You rang?" Edna then whispers to Buggy until his ears fall off and he shouts, "They flashingly did WHAT?!?"

And much to the Kids and the Kankers' horror, the Killer Sisters arrived. Julie, Lindsay, and Tara Killer are wearing black robes and Julie pulls out a microphone and says, "Helloooo Nagano! We're here for the heads to Lee, Marie, and May Kanker and no one will be hurt... except for anyone who tries to stop us and claims to be stronger than us... for the halftime show we're going to sing our number which is based off a popular villian song..."

And so Julie Killer sings "In a Dark of the Night" from the 20th Century Fox animated movie "Anastasia" but with the lyrics altered to match their goal of getting revenge on the Kanker Sisters. For some reason Rachel is dressed as a albino bat.

"In the dark of the night I was tossing and turning,

and the nightmares I had was as bad as can be.

it scared us out of our wits!

our gang falling to bits!

then we opened our eyes and the nightmare was us!

We were once the most powerful gang in all the county (ooh ahh ooh)

when the Kankers betrayed us they made a mistake (ooh ahh ooh)

our vengance made each of them fade

but three girls got away,

Kankers beware, the Killers are awake!

In the dark of the night evil will find them

in the dark of the night just before dawn

revenge will be sweet,

when our goal is complete,

in the dark of the night, they'll be gone!

I can feel our power are slowly returning

tie our sashes and a dash of cologne for that smell!

as the pieces fall into places,

We'll smash their cute little faces,

dasvidenya Kankers we'll see you, in hell!

In the dark of the night, terror will find them (terror's the least we can do!)

in the dark of the night, evil will brew

soon they will feel,

that their nightmares are real

in the dark of the night, They'll be through

in the dark of the night evil will find them (find them)

in the dark of the night, terror comes true (doom them)

my dears, heres a sign,

its the end of the line,

in the dark of the night,

in the dark of the night,

Come, my minions

rise for your masters,

let your evil shine!

Find her now,

yes, run ever faster

in the dark of the night

THEY WILL BE OURS!"

Ed sings along and Edna then says, "No Ed that's a bad thing, they really want to destory my best friend and her sisters!" Ed replies, "But Edna that song made it to number 6 of the Nostalgia Critic's list of best villian songs and I remember it so you don't have to!"

Julie then tells the WG cult members, you can fatten any girl you want, especially the red headed pirate but give us the Kankers!" A WG cult member points his pie-bazooka at Nami. Sanji stands in front of the member and asks him, "What do you think you're doing?". "I'm going to fatten up this girl and turn the Kankers over to our bosses!" said the WG Cult member. Sanji lit his King ground brand cigarette, "Oh no you're not." he replies as he proceeded to kick the member a lot... however he was wearing skates at the time...

As the four Eds struggle to protect Lee, Marie, and May from the Killers' minions, Edna points out to the Eds, "Hey look, the Straw Hats are helping us... oh no Sanji is using his martial arts while wearing ice skates! Well it serves those freaks right!"

Meanwhile, Some of the members also went up the commentors box. One of them says to the other, "My what a pretty cat and rabbit girls... You will look better fattened up!" As Ko shivers in fear, Usa fearlessly stood in front of Ko.

"Leave my sister out of this! Take me instead." said Usa. The members scowled and one of them replies, "Fine... but you better be all fattened up!" shouted the member.

Ko smirks, as she thinks to herself "Good thinking." she thought as the WG cult members fired every food ammo they have at Usa. And so Usa ate everything they gave to her... however... She wasn't gaining any weight! "More!" said Usa happilly. But as Usa isn't able to gain any weight, one of the members cried out of confusion, "Why isn't she getting any fatter! She should be fat by now!" cried one of the members in confusion.

Chester A. Bum grabs a member by the leg and begs, "Please Mister, I haven't eaten anything for a month and you're gonna waste it on girls, give me some of your food please!" One of the members then says, "No way you smelly bum! Get out of our way!" Chester A. Bum then says, "Ok, since you won't give me your food then how about some...CHANGE? YOU GOT CHANGE? c'mon help a guy out Change! Don't fill Usa's belly fill mine!" Ko then shouts, "ROLL A COMMERCIAL"

**(Commercial Begins)**

It opens with Edward and Bella from "Twilight" being all lovey dovey and sparkling... but then the song "Bloody Tears" plays in the background and Julius Belmont from "Castlevania: Aria of Sorrow" appears and Edward and Bella turn evil looking and go after Julius, but then Julius throws holy water on the ground, attacking the two. As a finishing move he pulls out his legendary whip "Vampire Killer" and uses the whip to attack Edward and Bella, buring them into nothing.

Announcer: "CASTLEVANIA: SPARKLING TWILIGHT" Coming Soon to the Nintendo DS, Wii, PS3, PSP, and XBOX 360.

**(Commercial Ends)**

So as the Lumpers attack everyone along side the WG cult, The Eds scramble, trying to protect the Kankers. Eddy then shouts out, "Why don't we just give them the Kankers, that's what they came for right?" Ryoko then pound Eddy and Ryoko then says to him, "Eddy you jerk! Don't you remember they're our friends now, plus if the Killers get through with them then they will get me and my siblings and after that they'll keep you three for yourselves and presumably torture Edna through "Saw" ways." Eddy shivers and wets himself and then kisses Lee Kanker's hand and arms and keeps saying, "I'm sorry, I'll protect you three then." Lee then asks Ryoko, "Let me guess... you gave him "the talk" didn't you?" Ryoko then replies, "Of course Lee, he need to know what would happen if the Killers ever got to you."

Ryoko is then startled by a WG Cult member who unmasks itself. It appears to be a 14 year old girl. Ryoko then asks, "Do I know you? Eddy take Lee and get out of here!" The girl replies, "I've been targeting you Ryoko Hakubi, my name is Gerry Berri, leader of the Lemon Brook division of the WG cult."

Ryoko looks in confusion and asks, "Why do you lead these sickos into fattening up innocent girls and why do you think I'm THE Ryoko Hakubi?" Gerry Berri answers, "Simple, those girls are cuter than me and once they are fatter than hippos then guys would have no choice but to find me the cutest girl in the town...I mean world! And I always wanted to fatten up the greatest space pirate ever... Now prepare yourself for a feast Ryoko Hakubi!" Ryoko angerly shouts, "I'm not THE Ryoko Hakubi, I don't even have a cabbit or fire "frickin' laser beams"!"

As Gerry Berri aims her pie-bazooka at Ryoko, Jimmy skates up to Gerry Berri and sticks his hockey stick into her bazooka, making it explode as Gerry Berri pulls the trigger. Gerry Berri then shouts, "I'll get you my pretty... and your little Cabbit too!"

Ryoko is shocked and just hugs Jimmy. Jimmy then says, "It's the right thing to do Miss Ryoko, those guys also targeted Sarah in the past, those no good... umm Ollie Williams what do you call them? Ollie Williams is dressed as Mohji the lion tamer and shouts, "THEM'S CHUBBY CHASERS!" The real Mohji sees him and asks him, "Why are you dressed like me?"

Jewelery Bonney is seen chasing the WG cult members attacking them for their food while Scratchmen Apoo plays his body as a instrument through his devil fruit power and he ends up creating a sonic blast, defeating the football players and cult members as he tells them, "Apapapapapa check it out!"

The Eds then run into the Straw Hats and Luffy then says to them, "You might not be the same Eds we met years ago in a dream but we got to help you!" Naruto adds, "Yeah it's the right thing to do... Believe it!" Sanji continues to kick the cult members, unaware he is wearing ice skates.

Then the Eds and the Kankers notice the Killers are chasing them with switchblades in their hands. Lindsay pulls out a lighter and says to them, "How about a little fire Kankers? AHAHAHAHAHAHA!"

But then Joe, May Kanker's boyfriend shows up with a pepper spray and sprays Lindsay's eyes, Lindsay shouts in pain and calmly says to Joe, "Nice try Kanker-lover, I built up a immunity to it!" Lindsay pounds him with a wooden plank that isn't Plank and joins up with her sisters in the chase.

Soon the Killers slip by Joe and continue chasing the seven. Double D then comments, "Goodness they're like Manta Rays, they will constantly chase their prey until they get what they want." They run by Buggy the Clown and Ed hands him a piece of paper and tell him, "If you stop those three, you can keep the treasure map!"

Buggy smiles and says, "In that case I'll flashingly deal with those three!" But as Buggy uses his Chop Chop powers, Lindsay and Tara grab him by his legs and Julie delivered a huge kick to Buggy's "Buggy Balls". As Buggy falls to the ground he asks in a high pitched voice, "How did you know how to overpower me?" Julie then says, "Well "Big Nose"! We noticed your feet remain on the ground when you split, now we got some Kankers to destroy but we'll take your nose as a trophy.

With that, the Julie grabs Buggy's nose and kicked him in the "Buggy balls" again and she and her sisters continue the chase. But all of a sudden, the Killers came across Nami, Sakura and Hinata.

"So your the female Straw Hat members. You look weak." said Julie Killer.

"That's right you all look weak" said Tara Killer

Julie just flicks her lighter and says, "Fire's nice!"

Nami then looks at them and says, "You guys are just as evil as Arlong but let's see if you are superior to him, and there is no way we're letting you three get your way!". And with that, Each girl fought with a Killer.

Julie was fighting Nami, during the fight she took out the Clim-a-tact.

"What's that. Is that supposed to be scary?" asked Julie

"You have no idea." siad Nami, she began to spin the cool poles and the hot poles, creating a large cloud. That's when she sent the Thunder Orb into it, causing the cloud sent out a ball of lighting on Julie. Julie then falls to the ground and shivered a bit.

Tara Killer was fighting Sakura while pulling out a lighter.

"You're a pink haired girl have to be the weakest of them all! Let's dance!" Said Tara.

""I'm the strongest on the crew." said Sakura.

"Oh really, prove it." said Tara as she sharpens her switchblade.

Sakura pounded the ground, created a huge crater.

Lindsay wets herself seeing this and she extends her hand and asks her, "Wanna be friends?"

Sakura then replies, "No way" and sticks her tounge out.

Lindsay Killer ends up fighting Hinata while flicking her lighter.

"So you have the gentle fist, I bet that it's exactly how it sounds like. Weak and gentle" said Lindsay as she scares Hinata with her lighter.

"It's not." said Hinata, who began to strike Julie each strike looked weak, but the footage was cut short... becase of a cue card that said "Please wait a moment" featuring a chibi Naruto giving a flower to a blushing chibi Hinata. When the card was removed it shows Hinata finishing her gentle fist and Julie Killer fell to the ground coughing up something that definately isn't raspberry jam.

To Julie, Lindsay, and Tara's horror, Nami and Sakura give the three evil looks while Ino shows up into the game and Nami tells them, "Edna told us who you three were and what you plan to do with your rivals the Kanker Sisters... how about we show you how it feels when you victimize them?"

Julie shivers and says, "Aw.... shi..." but was cut short... becase of a cue card that said "Please wait a moment" featuring a chibi Naruto eating ramen and a chibi Luffy eating meat.

When the card was removed, it shows the Killers wrapped up in bandages courtousy of Chopper while Robin watches and reads a book.

"All right we beat them!" said Sakura as she, Nami and Ino all high fived each other.

Chopper was also taking care of Buggy and Buggy looks at his "treasure map" and shouts, "THIS ISN'T A TREASURE MAP! IT'S A PLACEMAT FROM "BURGER PIRATE"!!! Well at least their "Gold Rodger special" lives up to it's name, thanks for fixing me up reindeer.

The Eds and the Kankers continue to run and Marie asks Double D, "Did we lose them?" And then after tripping on the puck, the three Kankers slip on the ice and continue to slide into the area near the goal.

Soon the remaining Lemon Brook Lumpers surround the recently recovered Killer Sisters as they run have Lee, Marie, and May Kanker in their clutches. Marie then asks them, "You have been beaten up, pepper sprayed, suprised attacked by Buggy, can't you guys stop stalking us and recover?" Julie then says, "Umm... nope! We're fast healers!" Tara then says, "And now we got you where we want you!" Julie is continuing to flick her lighter in order to be more intimidating.

The Eds and the Straw Hats couldn't get past the Lumpers. As Gerry Berri ends up in the circle and prepares her "cookie gun", Julie, Lindsay and Tara pulls out their switchblades as Julie tells them, "Ive been waiting for this for a long time DIE KANKERS! AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!"

But unexpectedly, they see Trafalgar Law jump infront of them, he smirks and flips them off. Julie then shouts at Law, "I don't care how hot you are but if you're going to save those three, then prepare to die!" Julie, Lindsay, and Tara prepare to stab Trafalgar Law their switchblades while Gerry Berri prepares her weapon but Trafalgar Law then moves his fingers around and soon the four find themselves in a spherical space. Then by making more hand gestures he soon separates the body parts of Julie, Lindsay, Tara, and Gerry Berri, and scrambles them around, soon he is seen juggling with their heads and putting them together into a four headed girl on Lindsay Killer's body, but with Julie Killer's hands for feet.

Luffy then sees this and says, "Cool, did he do that to you too Buggy?" Buggy replies, "Naw, my fruit made me like this, his fruit is making them like that." Law then removes Gerri Berry's head and places it on Julie Killer's body but with Lindsay and Tara's arms placed on the body's sides as if she had 4 extra arms. The four are terrified beyond words and cannot scream at this odd fate. Law then says coldly, "Perhaps I should leave you four like this since you enjoy causing similar fear towards others..." The Four Eds witness What Law is doing to the four with his unnammed devil fruit powers. Then Law says, "Just kidding..." And with that he moves his hands more and Julie, Lindsay, Tara, and Gerry Berri are scrambled back to their selves but they fall into the fetal position. Meanwhile Jean Bart and Bepo defeated the rest of the Lemon Brook Lumpers and Jewelery Bonney and Chester A. Bum manage to devour all of the WG cult members' ammo and defeat them by having Jewelery Bonney use her unnamed devil fruit power to turn the cult members into old people and children.

Edna then says, "Wow, it's the "dark doctor" himself, thank you for saving us!" Trafalgar Law then says, "Your welcome "Miss Fourth Ed", me and my Crew have figured out a way to get rid of those gate crashers, just continue the game ok?" Joe runs to May and asks her, "All you alright, I don't want to lose you like that!" May just smiles and kisses him back. Law then says to the two, "GAME! NOW!"

So while the Trey Parker song "Montage" plays in the background, the characters play the game until both sides are tied. Edna and Luffy then go against eachother, but then Edna is jumped by Ed dressed like Jason Voorhees and "stabs" her with a fake retracting knife while Luffy makes the winning shot.

Sure enough the Biju Biju Fruit team wins. Eddy is angry but Edna then says, "Hey those guys saved us back there and well... they deserve it this time... Oh and next time we play hockey, let's make sure that Ed isn't the goalie ok?"

Double D then asks Edna, "I wonder where did the marines go what did Trafalgar Law do to the Killers, the Lumpers, and the WG cult members?"

**(Elsewhere in a skating arena in the Cow Palace, not the Cow Palace!)**

The Marine Admirals Aokiji, Kizaru, and Akainu invade a skating arena but they find out instead of the hockey game they see "High School Musical on ice" and in the audience they see the Killers and Gerry Berri dressed as Monkey D. Luffy, Trafalgar Law, Hyuga Hinata, and Fox D. Naruto while the Lumpers and cult members are dressed as the crew members, they are all gagged and tied up.

Kizaru then laughs and says, "Looks like we have them where we want them, arrest them all men!" Coby, Helmeppo, Tashigi, Neji, and Smoker arrest everyone of them but they slowly realize that it isn't them but the Killers and their henchmen dressed like them. Akainu then fails to realize he heat from his devil fruit is making the ice melt under him and he falls into the water and he cannot swim due to his devil fruit. He shouts for help but Kizaru then says, "I dunno about you Aokiji but I'm not helping him, he almost killed me when we went after "Shiki the Golden Lion". Aokiji just sleeps while standing up.

**THE END... BUT WAIT!**

Weeks Later, Julie, Lindsay, and Tara Killer somehow manage to escape being sent to Impel Down and as they manage to return to Lemon Brook, they see that the town is in worser shape than before and some building are set on fire. Julie then says, "Oh no it looks like the place got ransaked by "Morgania" Pirates sisters!" Tara then says, "Let's get them then!" Lindsay then says, "Fire is nice..."

Then Julie shouts to the group of pirates, "Ok you jerks, show yourselves! I want your heads for destroying this town before we could!" Then they find out it's the Blackbeard Pirates, and even worse it's when it's comprised of Marshal D. Teach "Blackbeard", Lafitte, Doc Q and his horse Stronger, Jesus Burgess (pronounced "Hay-seuss"), Van Auger, Shiryuu, San Juan Wolf, Catarina Devon, Basco Shot, and Abalo Pizarro.

Upon realizing who they are, Julie, Lindsay and Tara shout in unison, "OH SHI..."

**THE END!**

**NEXT CANON CHAPTER:** Edna learns the most embarassing moment in Eddy's life and it involves Ed and a 80's show.


	30. Ed's Playhouse

**Ed, Edd, Eddy, n Edna**

**エド エッド エディ エドナ**

By Technomaru

Chapter 30: prelude to Ed, Edd, Eddy n Edna, Ed's Playhouse!

Note: I do not own Ed, Edd, n Eddy...but "The Fourth Ed" and the Kimono Sisters... and brother is mine! Rachel belongs to Squeaken1, Jennifer belongs to yukimizuno and the new OC Joe belongs to Votrongo at his request. Don Patch belongs to whoever made "Bobobo-bo Bo-bobo"

This is a spin-off of "The Grim ED-ventures of Ed, Edd, n Eddy". I always wondered what if Edna existed in the "Ed, Edd, n Eddy" canon and...THIS STORY DOES NOT CONTAIN SUPERNATURAL ELEMENTS! However fans want me to do it!

By the time you get this, I am a Ebay junkie, and I got a Wonderswan Color!

Eddy is setting up a scam with Ed. Double D shows up at the house but then says to Eddy, "Are you doing what I assume you're doing?" Eddy replies, "Yup!" Double D then asks Eddy, "But I thought you gave up scaming lest you suffer Ryoko's wrath. Eddy then replies, 'Yeah but if I quit scaming then this fanfic won't progress... besides the Author's girlfriend and two best friends bribed me with three jawbreakers to start scamming again.

Double D then says, "Oh you'd continue scaming... while the Kankers are here?" Sure enough Lee, Marie, and May are there, reading magazines and Lee says to Eddy, "Eddy you're not supposed to scam!" Eddy replies, "Yeah I figured if they showed up here, they would eventually help me with this scam." Double D then says, "Well did you even notice the Kimonos are already here?" Sure enough, Kasumi serves tea to the Kankers while Hikari and Ryoko are peeved by this. Ryoko tells Eddy, "Bribed or not, you're not supposed to scam AT ALL!"

Eddy then says to Ed and Double D, "Oh man I did not figure out she and her sisters would be there, now if only a "big mouthed crocodile incident" can get me out of this one!"

Ed then reminds Eddy, "But Eddy it's called a...

**BIG LIPPED ALLIGATOR MOMENT!** I also accept "Big Lipped Trumpet Playing Alligator Moment" or "Big Lipped Banana Gator Moment" for "One Piece" fans.

So then Edna shows up with big pink hair with hot pink highlights wearing a oversized hot pink colored shirt, black pants, white tennis shoes and blue leg warmers. Eddy then says, "Well the Alligator's lips couldn't get any bigger... what's with the get up Edna?" Edna replies, "Actually Eddy this was a gift from my sister who knows I like the 80's so much so I might as well try it on for the day. May then says to Edna, "Wow Edna, you look kinda like Jem!" Edna smiles and replies, "Why thank you May... and if you readers want to know what Jem is or what the 80's are like is either go on yootoobe or go ask your mother!"

Edna then asks Double D, "So what's up Double D and what brings you guys in Eddy's house?" Double D then replies, "Well Edna, it seems that Eddy is trying to scam after being bribed but it lead to a awkward moment.

Edna then asks Eddy, "Umm Eddy have you learned by now that scamming only brings embarassment?" Eddy then says, "Speaking of embarassment just what is really up with the get-up?" Edna then says, "Also this is my real hair, it's a wig to cover THIS!

And with that, Edna takes off her wig, revealing her bald head. The Eds, Kankers, and Kimonos are shocked and Ed yells out, "EDNA'S A HAIR HUNTER! RUN DON PATCH RUN!" And with that Don Patch runs out of the house screaming "YIPPIE KAI YAY BROTHER TUCKERS!"

Edna giggles at the sight and says, "No Ed, I'm not a member of the hair hunt troop! I volunteered to have my infamous hair cut off for "locks of love"." Marie then asks, "You mean that non-profit charity that helps those who are bald due to medical problems?" Edna nods and everyone but Eddy then say, "Awww"

Lee then asks Edna, "But they only cut off the hair, why are you bald?" Edna replies, "Oh that was when after I left the place for my haircut I ended up with gum in my hair so I had it shaved off, by the way guys and girls, Nazz has no idea I did this and I wish you guys don't tell her until the time is right!"

Everyone but Eddy does the "zip the lip" sign and Eddy then asks her, "Non-profit! Why didn't you just sell it to a rich bald kid?" Edna then shouts really loud at Eddy, "MY HEAD IS BARE BECAUSE I CARE! Guys I think we have a way to punish this heartless brute... let's make him tell us a embarassing story involving a scam... a really embarassing one."

Eddy then replies, "Geez... do I have to?" Edna replies, "Yes you do, you made a heartless comment about "Locks of love", my sister's outfit, and you scammed despite bein told not to... it's either that or make you do 5 hours of... COMMUNITY SERVICE!

Eddy wets his pants a little and shouts, "OH NO... NOT THAT! I'D ALLOW A KANKER TO HUG ME THAN THAT!" Lee Kanker hugs him and asks him, "Then can you tell us that story please?"

Eddy is about to tell the story but then he asks, "Umm does anyone have a glass of water?" Marie Kanker then gets him a glass of water. Eddy then starts his story.

**(Long ago, 2 months before Ed, Edd, n Eddy even met Edna)**

Ed and Eddy run to Eddy's house and he says, "Oh boy! I can't believe after selling Double D's special pills, I manage to rake in $100,000. Ed is shocked and a sound of broken glass was heard, then he shouts at Eddy in anger, "I might be stupid but... ARE YOU SELLING DRUGS TO THE KIDS?" Eddy then says, "Yeah right, what do you take me for, Tony Montana? These pills were designed to make whoever swallows them to make their "B.M."s and farts smell like baked apple pie... with a dash of cinnamon.

Ed smiles and asks him, "Can I have some? I mean I gotta break wind soon!" Eddy replies, "Actually I ran out and Double D isn't supposed to know I stole them just to sell them... oh no there he is! Here hold on to this $100,000, I'll be right back.

**(A day later)**

Eddy shows up in Ed's basement and says, "Hey Lumpy! Double D isn't mad about the pills anymore... Ed?"

Eddy goes into Ed's room and to his horror he sees something shocking and surreal at the same time. Then Eddy shouts at the top of his lung, **"ED YOU IDIOT! YOU SPEND $100,000 JUST TO REMODEL YOUR ROOM TO LOOK LIKE PEE WEE'S PLAYHOUSE?"**

Ed shows up in a grey suit and red bowtie while making a weird giggle. Ed then says to Eddy, "Morning Eddy! I'm gonna sing my theme song!

"C'mon get up! Knock off your napping

It's a crazy messed up place where anything can happen

There's a fish that freakin' talks,

hey look!There's a robot that give advice, holy snap!

It's screwy in Ed's Playhouse!, hahaha!"

Eddy then asks Ed, "You've been watching "Family Guy" have you? Ed asks Eddy, "What's Family Guy?"

Soon Ed activates Conky 2000 and then the cyborg introduces himself "I am Conky 2000 and I'm ready to assist you Ed" and the secret word comes out of his mouth and Ed holds it and shows it to the audience and says "the secret word of the day is…DORK"! so whenever someone says the secret word, SCREAM REAL LOUD! Ha ha!"

Eddy pulls out a board with a nail on it and before he strikes Ed with it, Ed then shouts, "Oh no it's the playhouse bully Kevin!"

Kevin is connected to strings and is lowered to the ground and he says, "You are so dead... **DORK**!"

Soon Ed yells really loud at Kevin and he sings, 'You said the secret word! You said the secret word, ha ha!" Kevin is confused and Ed tells him again, "If you said the secret word of the day, we have to scream real loud!" Kevin then says, "Yeah right you **DORK**! Ahhh stop screaming in my ear!" Ed then says, "Sorry but not until the day is over, Ha ha!" Kevin then tries to restrain from saying the word but then slips out "**DORK**!" cuts off his puppet strings and runs out of the "playhouse".

Ed then giggles and then he rides on a little car and sings a little song

"Ed-ee Herman having fun, e-i-e-i-o

Ed-ee Herman like to eat, e-i-e-i-o

With a gravy gravy here and a gravy gravy there,

Here's a gravy, there's a gravy, gravy gravy everywhere

Ed-ee Herman having gravy, e-i-e-i-o!

But then he parks near "PuppetLand", a stage where the PuppetLand band (Chicky Baby, Dirty Dog, and Cool Cat) are performing. Ed then says, "You beatnik puppets are out of date, ha ha!" Eddy is still puzzled by what he is seeing.

Ed gets up and tells the audience that he's gonna play with some toys.

Ed then pulls out giant underpants and tells the audience "look, it's my giant underpants, you can do a lot of cool things with giant underpants, just watch! (Ed takes off his straw hat and puts it on his head and wraps it around his head) look! A turban, haha! ( the giant underpants unravel) oooh! Rapunzel, haha! You can pull them down like this if you want, and you can make… a suave vest! Haha!...GIANT UNDERPANTS!

Ed then pulls out a giant bra and puts it over his eyes and says "look, a blindfold for aliens! Haha" and then he puts it on his head and starts chanting ceremonially (congratulations to the person who got this joke)

Eddy couldn't help but laugh at this sight, forgetting that he wants to beat the scrap out of Ed for using all that money just to make his room like the Playhouse.

But then Ed has a really funny idea. He goes to the bathroom and then puts scotch tape everywhere on his face, making his face look really distorted.

But then The door busts down and out comes Lee, Marie, and May Kanker (remember this is a flashback) May then shouts, "Here I am "Big Ed"! WHAT IS THIS?" Lee, Marie, and May are shocked by this sight of the "playhouse" Lee then says, "Oh man... did someone open the paint thinner, why am I seeing this?" Marie then says, "This looks awfully familiar"

But then Ed with the scotch tape on his face appear in front of the Kankers and makes a growl. The three were scared senseless as Ed makes a Pee Wee Herman-esq laugh. Lee then gets angry and shouts, "What's the big idea you **DORK!** Why are you screaming at my face?" Ed sings, 'You said the secret word! You said the secret word, ha ha!"

Eddy laugh so hard at this surreal sight. Ed then looks at May Kanker and says, "Hey you're not Miss Yvonne!" Lee then sees Eddy and asks him, "Why does your friend think he's Pee-Wee Herman?" Eddy holds in his laughter and bursts out, "Because he can HAHAHAHA! This is so worth the money!"

Lee is extremely weirded out by all this and she says to her sisters, "This is officially freaked out by this..." May then asks, "Didn't Pee Wee Herman get arrested in a movie theater for... watching "Bio-dome", "Son-In Law", and "Jury Duty" in a film festival?" Marie then says, "I know Pauly Shore is that bad but that's extreme... now why are we talking about Pauly Shore again?"

Lee then says, "Who cares? this place is making us weird and Eddy isn't scared of me, let's get out of here!" As Lee and Marie run off, Ed grabs May and asks her, "Can you please be Miss Yvonne?" May then smiles and asks, "Do I get to wear a pretty dress?" Ed replies, "You even get to wear a wig!" May smiles.

Then after May dresses up like Miss Yvonne, Ed hears a knock at the door and when he opens it he sees Sarah who is angry and yells at him "Ed what is that noise and why are you dressed like that?" and then Ed slams the door while screaming and yells out "AAAAAH!...BABY SISTER!..haha!"

Ed then says to Eddy and May, "Wanna meet my Genie in a box? Hey Jambi!" Then a box opens up, revealing a green faced Double D. Double D then says, "I will demonstraight my magic but first in ancient Jambi-nese I will use the magic words. Now repeat after me…

Mekka-lekka hi mekka hiney ho!

Mekka-lekka hi mekka chonny ho!

Mola-mekka ... oh I give up, this is stupid Ed!"

And with that, Double D just gets up and leaves the room.

Rolf then shows up wearing a crown and then Ed shouts, "THE KING OF CARTOONS IS HERE... YIPPEE haha!" May then looks at Eddy and asks him, "Is "Big Ed" officially insane?" Eddy then says, "I belive so, I can't belive he got Rolf into doing this as well!"

Rolf then says as he readies his film projector, "Ed who think he Pee-Wee Herman... Let the Cartooooooon begin!"

But then the film projector sets on fire and then "playhouse" is on fire. May then tries to use the Picturephone to dial 9-1-1 but it turns out to be a prop. Then Ed runs around screaming while Eddy faints.

As Ed, Eddy, and May come to, they see the firemen putting out the fire and one of them shouts, "It's just a minor fire, the house can be repaired easily!"

Rolf then sees the three and says to them, "A "thank you would do so well" and worse of advice... never imitate TV!" Rolf then walks away as the three are awfully confused by this and try to pretend this surreal moment never happened.

Johnny shows up dressed like a cowboy while Plank is dressed up like a horse, Johnny then asks Ed, "Well golly Ed-ee, am I late to the Playhouse?" The three just stare blankly at him.

**(Flashback Ends)**

Eddy then ends the story with, "And so this is the worse thing that ever happened to us involving a scam, boy do I feel like such a **DORK**, May don't scream at my face!

Soon everyone was laughing at Eddy's story. Then Rachel and Jenny come out of hiding and they laughed at the story as well. Eddy then asks them, "Are you laughing at me or are you laughing at the stuff Ed did in the grey suit?" Rachel then giggles and replies, "Mostly Ed as Pee-Wee, but hey did you feel good telling it to us instead of keeping it under your skin?" Eddy then replies, "Yeah it does, and it was funny seeing the Kankers weirded out by Ed's obsession with Pee Wee's Playhouse."

Lee then pouts in a cute way and says, "Hey that's not nice making fun of us... what would you do if we remodeled one of our rooms to resemble something Tim Burton designed, would it creep you out?" Eddy then replies, "good point." Ryoko then hugs Eddy and giggles a bit.

Ed then asks Eddy, "Umm Eddy, I remember you let me borrow this tape, what did it mean?" Before Eddy can do anything, Edna grabs the tape and puts it on Eddy's VCR. Then they see Eddy in a Christmas sweater. Eddy tries to sneak away while everyone is watching the video but Ryoko grabs him and says, "Nuh uh, I want you to explain this!"

Then Eddy on the video says, "Ok this is my first video for Yootoob, I wrote a song sung to the tune of "Christmas is Creepy" by Fred Figglehorn and it's about the very threat of us Eds... 3...2...1!

Ed then sucks on helium and shouts in a high pitched voice, "HEY IT'S ED!" Then Eddy kicks him out of the way, sucks on helium and starts singing:

OOOOOH

You know what I'm sayin?

Yeah

Kinda Strange

If a Kanker knew where I live

That would be creepy(creepy)

If Marie Kanker snuck in my house

That would be creepy(creepy)

Lee creepin runnin down my chimney at night

I can't explain it but it doesn't feel right

She knows if you been good

She knows if you been bad

It's kinda feaky

Did she think she could just come up come in my house like that?

OOOOOOH

Kinda think of it her sisters are really scary (so small)

Little pretty ears and sweaty hands that might be SCARY!

May (buck teeth)

Marie (might eat me)

Kankers are kinda strange

When you think about it that way

If a Kanker knew where I live

That would be creepy(creepy)

If May Kanker snuck in my house

That would be creepy(creepy)

And what's really weird

Kankers are to be feared

Somethin doesn't seem right to me (no)

If a Kanker knew where I live

That would be cre-cre-creepy"

Edna then turns off the tape and then angerly asks Eddy, "Explain this!" Eddy then says, "After they stalked us that one time that Christmas, I was tempted to write the song and sing it on youtube, looks like I forgot all about it... I'm in trouble ain't I?" Rachel and Jenny find themselves laughing really hard because they are aware of who Fred Figglehorn is.

Edna then thinks and says to Eddy, "Actually I don't think so since it was made before I moved here and formed the truce between you guys." Eddy then sweatdrops out of relief.

Rachel then says, "But Edna, how can that be if Fred released that song on December 7th 2009? The Eds, Kimonos, and Kankers turn their head but Eddy already ran out of the house like a madman. Edna then says, "That's our Eddy!"Lee replies, "Yeah, acting dumb out of leaving the audience laughing," Ed just replies, Not even I'm that dumb Lee!" Nazz shows up unexpectedly and asks Edna, "I just got a letter from "Locks of Love" What's this I hear about you shaving yourself bald?" The Eds, Kimonos, and Kankers turn their head but Edna already ran out of the house like a madwoman. Edna can be heard screaming, "EDDY! WAIT FOR ME! I WANNA RUN AWAY FROM TROUBLE TOO!

Nazz then says, "Well that was weird oh and did anyone read this newspaper article?" To the horror of the Eds, Kimonos, Jenny but mostly to Rachel and the Kankers, the article reads "**THE KILLER SISTERS MYSTERIOUSLY VANISH INTO THIN AIR, GODDESS OF CHAOS OR ALIEN INVADERS ARE TO BLAME!"**

**NEXT TIME:** The next chapter involves Kevin wanting revenge on Edna and the Eds and it will be in 3D!


	31. Gravy Pebbles Commercials

**Ed, Edd, Eddy, n Edna**

**エド エッド エディ エドナ**

By Technomaru

Chapter 31: Gravy Pebbles are Yabba-Dabba Delicious!

**Note: I do not own Ed, Edd, n Eddy...but "The Fourth Ed" and the Kimono Sisters... and brother is mine! Rachel belongs to Squeaken1, Jennifer belongs to yukimizuno and the new OC Joe belongs to Votrongo at his request. Don Patch belongs to Yoshio Sawai. The two Johns own They Might Be Giants and they get parodied here too!**

**This is a spin-off of "The Grim ED-ventures of Ed, Edd, n Eddy". I always wondered what if Edna existed in the "Ed, Edd, n Eddy" canon and...THIS STORY DOES NOT CONTAIN SUPERNATURAL ELEMENTS! However fans want me to do it!**

**I apologize for the long wait but I have work and I'm currently addicted to either Pokemon Soul Silver (gotta catch 'em all... gotta catch 'em all... gotta catch 'em all... gotta catch 'em all...) but the real next chapter is in the works, until then I want to test out this upcoming series of omakes involving a parody of those cereal commercials involving certain cavemen... oh you'll find out what it parodies! Thank you for your understanding.**

_Commercial #1_

Ed is in his front yard eating a bowl of "Gravy Pebbles" in pure delight. But then Edna spots Ed eating breakfast with her binoculars.

Edna then says to the readers, "Watch me trick Ed out of his Gravy Pebbles"

Edna then shows up wearing yellow shorts, a red and blue shirt with a Totodile on the chest area and a hat with a Pikachu on it. She has pokeballs on her belt. Then she says to Ed, "Hi I'm a Pokemon trainer and I would like some breakfast before I go against the Elite Four!"

Ed then smiles and says, "Ok you can have my Gravy Pebbles!"

Edna then eats some and says, "Mmmm... irrisistably rich in lumpy gravy taste!"

Ed then smiles and says, "Now can I see your Pokemon?" Edna then sweatdrops and nervously then says, "Umm...umm...hey look a Manky!" As Ed turns around, Edna runs off and drops her hat and toy pokeballs. Ed then sees her and shouts, "EDNA MY PEBBLES!"

Edna then says, "Gotta catch 'em all!"

As Ed chases Edna, Ed's voice over then says, "Post Gravy Pebbles part of this good breakfast, yabba dabba gravy!"

_Commercial #2_

Ed is in a picnic table eating a bowl of "Gravy Pebbles" in pure delight. But then Edna spots Ed eating breakfast with her binoculars with May while hiding in the bushes.

Edna then says to the readers, "Watch us trick Ed out of his Gravy Pebbles." May then asks Edna, "Umm why are we doing this?" Edna then says, "Umm... cuz it's fun! Plus we're being paid to be in this commercial, and I just like the taste of that unusual cereal... and I'll get you some too!" May then says, "O...kay... but did it occur to you that instead of using costumes and gadget we can just go to the store and buy our own box of Gravy Pebbles?" Edna then says, "Ummm... NAH!"

Then Edna and May pop out of the bushes with Edna wearing a red checkered shirt with black pants and carrying a guitar and May also wearing a black shirt and black pants while carrying a guitar. Then they start singing:

_"Blue canary in the outlet by the light switch_

_Who watches over you_

_Make a little birdhouse in your soul_

_Not to put too fine a point on it_

_Say I'm the only bee in your bonnet_

_Make a little birdhouse in your soul."_

Ed smiles and says, "Hey I know you guys... your're the two Garys of "They Must be Midgets!"

Edna then says, "No, we're the two Johns of "They Might Be Giants"... I'm John Flansberg and he's John Linnel. We're here for some breakfast before we perform a another big concert."

Ed then says, "Ok I'll give you my cereal but first sing a fanfiction dot net friendly parody of "Other Father Song" from the movie "Coraline"." Then Edna pulls out a toy piano and plays with it while May starts singing the song with a altered lyric:

_"Makin' up a song about Caroline_

_She's a peach, she's a doll, she's a pal of mine_

_She's as cute as a button_

_In the eyes of everyone who ever laid their eyes on Caroline_

_When she comes around exploring_

_Mom and I will never, ever make it boring_

_Our eyes will be on Caroline"_

After Ed is done waving his lighter in the air, he hands Edna and May a bowl of Gravy Pebbles, Edna then eats some and says, "Mmmm... irrisistably rich in lumpy gravy taste!"

May takes a bite and gags on it and says, "Ewww, it tastes bad, how can you like this stuff Edna? ... OOPS!"

As Edna and May's wigs fall off, Ed then sees them and shouts, "May? EDNA MY PEBBLES!"

Edna then smiles as says to Ed, "Don't let's start!"

As Ed chases Edna and May, Ed's voice over then says, "Post Gravy Pebbles part of a complete breakfast, yabba dabba gravy!"

**NEXT TIME:** The next chapter involves Kevin wanting revenge on Edna and the Eds and it will be in 3D! for real real not for play play!


	32. IN 3D

**Ed, Edd, Eddy, n Edna**

**エド エッド エディ エドナ**

By Technomaru

Chapter 32: Kevin's Revenge... **IN 3D**!

Note: I do not own Ed, Edd, n Eddy...but "The Fourth Ed" and the Kimono Sisters... and brother is mine! Rachel belongs to Squeaken1, Jennifer belongs to yukimizuno and the new OC Joe belongs to Votrongo at his request. Don Patch belongs to Yoshio Sawai

This is a spin-off of "The Grim ED-ventures of Ed, Edd, n Eddy". I always wondered what if Edna existed in the "Ed, Edd, n Eddy" canon and...THIS STORY DOES NOT CONTAIN SUPERNATURAL ELEMENTS! However fans want me to do it!

By the time you get this, I am a Ebay junkie, and I got a Wonderswan Color!

As a way to parody the 3D Craze, this chapter will have scenes made in 3D so be prepared to pull out your 3D glasses" to see the action up close and personal (3D glasses not included)

One Winter day, Edna decides to have her best friends the male Eds as well as the Kankers over.

May then asks Edna who is drinking strawberry milk, "Umm Edna I forgot... do I live with you and your family or with my sisters? It's just that sometimes continuity confuses me." Edna then says, "Hmmm... I don't know anymore... even though your sisters got a new house thanks to the Kimonos. Looks like I need to look up a good excuse..."

Edna then pulls out a piece of paper from a "Edd hat" and she reads, "It's because my parents like having you around since you're the first female friend I've ever made, we're very close, and you deserve better than the so called "trailer trash life"." May then says, "Looks like you're right, my life has changed for the best, thanks Edna!" May hugs Edna as Edna looks at her watch and tells May, "Looks like the Eds and the Kankers should arrive, then he can just hang out... and show them my collection of costumes and disguises... they're here now!" May then comments, "But I still can't believe you got us Kankers and those Eds to live in peace."

Edna and May see Ed and Marie eating pocky while Eddy just stares at Lee. Lee then says to him, "Eddy why do you look at me like that even though Edna re-arranged my face to be pretty?" Eddy then says, "I still don't trust you, despite your pretty hypnotic face, I know you're Lee Kanker..."

Edna opens the door and says, "Hello guys, welcome to "Casa de Espinoza!" Eddy then replies, "Edna, we've been to your house several times, why do you act like you don't know?" Edna then ponders and asks, "Say May, which continuity is this? Is this the one where I'm a 7 year old and my puppy is the son of Courage the Cowardly Dog? Or is this the one where me and the Eds are best friends with the Grim Reaper?" May replies, "No this is the one where we're friends with the Eds and that's just about it. And Edna you need to see a specialist if you keep having these weird dreams." Edna just sheepishly laughs.

Ed then asks Edna, "Hey Edna where is your massive collection of costumes like the ones May mentioned?" Edna then cheerfully replies, "I thought you've never asked. Come with me boys... and girls!"

So the Eds and the Kankers enter a long hallway and as they stop near the end, Edna triumpantly tells them, "Gentleman... Behold!" Ed perks up and asks, "Is the rabbot here Dr. Weird?" Double D then replies, "I still can't believe Adult Swim is still showing that program ever since it's very beginning... and at the same time hallucinogetic mushroom use has been increasing.

Edna then jumps into the closet and comes out dressed as May Kanker with popcicle sticks as buckteeth. May then sees this and says, "It's really like I'm looking at a mirror." Eddy then says, "Hey Edna, did you make these costumes for us?" Then the Kankers see Eddy dressed as infamous theif Lupin the 3rd in a red jacket, Double D is Jigen Daisuke, and Ed is dressed as Goemon Ishikawa XIII. Edna then shows up in a red dress and asks Eddy, "I guess that makes me Fujiko Mine, ha ha ha" Eddy replies, "Yeah, if she was disguised as "Ugly" Betty Suarez! HA ha ha ha!" Edna then frowns and says, "Oh geez, that show is cancelled months ago and I think that joke lost it's funny."

Edna turns around and sees Lee, Marie, and May dressed as the American Powerpuff Girls Blossom, Buttercup, and Bubbles. Edna then says, "Saw that coming! Oh and I also made Powerpuff Girl Z versions of those costumes.

Edna then falls into the wardrobe along with the Eds and the Kankers and they come out as the characters from Scooby Doo. Ed is dressed as Scooby, Edd is dressed as Fred, Eddy is dressed as Shaggy, Edna is dressed as Velma, and Lee is dressed as Daphne. Then Marie shows up dressed as Scrappy Doo. Edna then comments, "Hold on... I don't remember making a Scrappy Doo costume!" Marie then replies, "You didn't... these are my pajamas."

Double D then says to Edna, "You know Edna, I can make costumes too... but one time we decided to dress as Disney characters for a costume party at school...

**(Cutaway begins)**

Double D wheels around in his wheeler costume and he says, "I don't think anyone has seen "Return to OZ", I mean I enjoyed that Disney movie because it was the only thing close to being true to the original Frank L. Bahm novels. Double D then sees Eddy and Eddy then says, "What are you supposed to be? A Power Rangers monster?" Double D then says, "I'm a wheeler, a creature that serves Princess Mombi from "Return to OZ" and... GOOD LORD EDDY!" Eddy then says, "I'm dressed in my Scrooge Mcduck costume, seeing as I like money and a lot of it!" Double D covers his eyes with his front wheels and says, "It's not that... YOU'RE NOT WEARING ANY PANTS!"

True, Eddy is wearing small glasses, a top hat, and a blue (or red) smoking jacket... but no pants (thank goodness censor bars exist) Eddy then says, "At least I got the spats right!" Double D then asks, "Why don't you dress like Flintheart Glomgold? Eddy responds, "But he's the SECOND richest duck in the world!" Double D then says, "I hope things don't get any worse..." Then smoke appears and Ed shouts, "I AM THE TERROR THAT FLAPS IN THE NIGHT! I am the grill that cooks your hotdogs... I AM DARKWING DUCK!"

Double D is shocked to see Ed dressed like Darkwing Duck, he has the hat, cape, costume, mask, even the gas gun... BUT NO PANTS! Double D then faints as Ed and Eddy are escourted by security for their "wardrobe malfunctions". Ed shouts as he is being escourted, "LET'S GET DANGEROUS!"

Nazz walks by dressed as Alice from "Alice in Wonderland" and says, "Nice wheeler costume Double D, if you weren't unconcious I'd be terrified." Then she picks up Double D and takes him outside for some fresh air.

**(Cutaway ends)**

Soon, Eddy and Double D are reading Edna's newspaper. Eddy then says, "I wonder if the Ed and the girls are done with whatever they plan to suprise us with." Double D just shrugs but then Edna and the Kankers show up dressed in very familiar costumes.

Edna: SPORTY!

May: BABY!

Lee: GINGER!

Marie: POSH...and married to a "football player"!

Ed: SCARY!

Then they all shout, "GIRL POWER!" Ed then says, "Plus a boy!" Eddy and Double D cover their eyes and Eddy says, "Oh you're scary all right, but not scary spice!" Double D then drags Ed back to the room and changed him in clean clothes. Ed then looks left and right and then he pulls out a bowl of Gravy Pebbles.

The girls then make big smiles at the sight of Ed's cereal and then Ed smiles and says to them, "Oh my gosh it's the Spice Girls! Do you want my Grav...HEY WAIT A MINUTE! I'm not falling for that again!"

Then the girls sadly walk away while Edna and May go into the closet. Suddenly, Edna and May pop out of the closet with Edna wearing a black suit and carrying a guitar and May also wearing a black suit while carrying a guitar. Then they start singing:

_"Blue canary in the outlet by the light switch_

_Who watches over you_

_Make a little birdhouse in your soul_

_Not to put too fine a point on it_

_Say I'm the only bee in your bonnet_

_Make a little birdhouse in your soul."_

Ed smiles and says, "I get the joke, your guys are dressed like the two garys of "They must be midgets!"

Edna then says, "No, we're the two Johns of "They Might Be Giants"... I'm dressed as John Flansberg and May's John Linnel.

Ed then asks, "Umm... didn't you dress like then when you tried to steal my gravy pebbles again?" Edna then says, "Umm... I think you might be confusing us for someone else."

Eddy then says, "Enough! Does this chapter even have a plot?"

Then a page of the newspaper flies at Edna's face. Edna then takes a look and says "OOOOHHHHH! FINALLY! Dad told me he took my mom to see this back in 1982 but now... TRON HAS A SEQUEL! And it's in 3D"

Double D then seem delighted, then he non-chalantly says, "Oh ok... has anyone seen the movie TRON?"

Lee: No

Marie: No

May: No

Eddy: No

Edna: "Yes... I mean it, I saw it with my sister years ago!"

Double D then says to his friends, "Then it's settled, Let's go to see "TRON: Legacy"!" May then says, "Sorry Edna but I'm going on a date with Joe today." Lee then says, "Sorry too but that isn't something me and Marie are into so you guys just enjoy yourselves."

Edna then says, "Well it looks like a four Eds thing, let's go then!"

So Ed, Edd, Eddy, n Edna just walk to the new movie theater in Downtown Peach Creek while Ed annoys the others by singing the theme to "Whalers on the moon".

**((PUT ON YOUR 3D GLASSES NOW! 3D glasses not included))**

When they got there, Edna decided to treat her three friends and looked around the theater. Eddy gets the shivers when he sees a poster for "Jackass 3D". Edna smirks and says, "Heh, I guess you still remember what you did in chapter 9 huh you "jackass". Ed then adds, "I videorecorded your stupid stunts and I watch them every night!"

Double D sees a poster and says, "Intreguing! Looks like my favorite French comic book "Asterix" is having a 3D movie too, "Asterix: The Mansions of the Gods in 3D" Edna replies, "Cool, my sister used to read that in her French class!"

Ed then drools at the sight of the movie poster for "A Nightmare on Elm Street" and his drool spashes at the readers. Ed then begs Edna, "PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE CAN WE SEE THAT MOVIE?" Edna then says, "No Ed, not only are we under 17 but we came to see "TRON: Legacy", plus that movie isn't in 3D and a reviewer claims it's much scarier than the original, now let's go!"

As Eddy follows them he accidentally trips on a bucket of popcorn and the popcorn falls on the readers.

And so the four Eds go to the room and prepare to see the movie in it's splender, unaware that someone has been following them and waits for them to leave the room.

**(2 hours later)**

When "TRON: Legacy" ended, Edna gets up from her seat and says to the male Eds, "Wow, it's amazing what 28 years can do to a Disney cult-classic! Now if only they remade "Max Devlin and the Devil" but with Dave Chappelle in Bill Cosby's role."

Double D looked around and says to Edna, "Umm Edna, do you know where Ed went?" Edna then gasps and says, "Oh no... don't tell me he decided to ditch us just to see that new Freddy Krueger movie!" Eddy then smiles and says, "Ok I won't tell you! HA HA HA!" Edna then says, "We got to get him back and you're coming with us since YOU encouraged Ed to go "theater hopping"!" Eddy then says, "Geez, can't you take a joke?"

Edna then takes Eddy and Double D with her and she calls for Ed. She shouts out, "Ed! Where are you? I hope you're not seeing that movie! It isn't worth being banned from the theater for this!"

But as they go to the other side of the theater they see what appears to be a boy Eddy's age but he wears a blue shirt and grey shorts, he wears a green hat as well as golden inline skates. He is holding a bent golden baseball bat.

Edna cringes in fear as she stands infront of Eddy and Double D. Edna then says, "Oh no... it's "Lil' Slugger"! I thought he was a apparition from the anime "Paranoia Agent", how is he here?" Then the boy lifts his face and is revealed to be a clown mask. Eddy quickly covers Edna's face as Edna asks, "W..w...who are you?"

The boy then makes a distubing laugh and he says, "Remember the time we had a fight and you made me lose Nazz?" Edna sweatdrops. The boy continues, "Everytime I planned revenge those three always got in the way and they tried to have their way with me, but now they're gone it's playtime, I'm going to finish you off once and for all!"

Edna then says, "Oh no...oh no..."

The kid takes off his clown mask and it's Kevin!

Kevin then says, "I decided to play on your fears so with this "Lil' Slugger" motif, my clown mask and some marshmallows, I plan to take my revenge on you and your dor...male Ed friends... and that ugly girl you hang out with so much!"

Kevin then puts his clown mask back on and runs towards Edna. Double D then tells her, "Edna don't look at him, run, RUN!" Eddy then grabs Edna and Double D's arms as the three run away from Kevin as he swings his bat and his bat is close enough to hitting the readers.

They ran into a room that shows "How to Train your Dragon 3D", then they run through a room that shows "Shrek Forever After 3D", Then they enter a room that shows "DUNE 3D" and Edna then says, "Is it me or having the movie in 3D seemed to make Baron Harkonnen even more fatter and grosser? Oh right we're being chased by Kevin... RUN!"

Edna then has a idea and the three manage to dress themselves up as Gru's minions from "Despicable Me" and pretend to be statues. Kevin then shows up and looks left and right, then Edna makes a extremely loud sneeze and blows their cover. Eddy then says, "You just had to pick up that bad habit from that one girl!" Edna then replies, "Oh shut up and run!"

Then the three run into Ed who apparently is bloated and then Edna sees this and says to him, "Let me guess... You discovered "free refills" didn't ya?" Ed then responds with a belch and a soda fountain sprays at the readers.

As the Eds separate, Edna then runs into the girls room and locks herself in a stall while Kevin chases her but then a few screams of other girls came from the stalls and they start tossing toilet paper rolls at Kevin and some of them are tossed at the reader. Kevin then says, "No fair! At least I still have dorky to get revenge on."

Then out of nowhere, Kevin shows up in front of Eddy and his raises his bat as he is about to bash Eddy's face in. But then his bat is grabbed by Lee Kanker, pretending to be someone else. Kevin starts falling for her and smiles in a dazed away.

Lee then says to him, "Hello, is that a bat in your hand or are you happy to see me?" Kevin puts his bat down and says to her, "You're pretty... you single?" Lee giggles in a cute way. Eddy watches this while hiding behind a trash can and thinks to himself, "Thank goodness Edna made Lee pretty."

Lee is about to hug and kiss Kevin but to her suprise, Kevin hugs and kisses her. Lee giggles and says to him, "Wow, this is the first time I kiss a boy and the boy isn't screaming in fear." Kevin then says, "Why shouldn't he? You're hot! Like, what's your name?"

Lee Kanker just says her name and Kevin replies while laughing out loud, "AHAHAHAHA! There is no way a babe like you can be Lee Kanker, Lee Kanker is butt ugly, she covers her three eyes with her messy red hair, her voice sounds like a toilet flushing, she has ugly teeth, and breath that smells like a elephant's butt."

Lee tries her hardest to hold in her anger then says, "How about another kiss? Am I your girlfriend now?" Kevin smiles even bigger and says, "ABSOLUTELY!"

As Kevin and Lee kiss, Marie shows up and says to Lee, "Hey Lee, Jackass 3D is starting a few minutes... oh am I interrupting something Lee?"

Kevin snaps out of his daze and asks, "You're Lee Kanker? But it can't be, there is no proof other than your red hair and her clothes... but your face..."

Lee then says to Kevin, "Remember what happened back in Chapter 21 involving wrestling and Edna bashed my face in and the wrestling collapsed on itself... it made my face look like this and now I'm hotter than Nazz."

Kevin then replies, "You got that right, you're so ho... oh wait no no NO!" Lee laughs and says to him, "You said I'm your girlfriend and now... let's date!" Kevin then goes catatonic as he is being dragged by Lee into the theater, Marie then says to him, "Serves you right for falling for a person's appearance and not knowing her true personallity."

Eddy then comes out of hiding and says, "I was saved by Kankers?" I thought the day that happens is the day when Tron gets a seque... oh right."

**((REMOVE YOUR 3D GLASSES NOW! 3D glasses not included))**

Ed, Edd, n Edna run to Eddy and Edna says to him, "I saw the whole thing... so you think Kankers are evil now?"

Eddy then replies to her, "Those two saved me from Kevin. You were right and I was wrong, so now I know and knowing is half the battle."

Ed then asks Edna, "So now what do we do? Create more 3D effects so the readers can put their glasses back on?"

Edna then says to her friends, "Let's go out for sushi or something."

Then Ed, Edd, Eddy, n Edna shout out, "YAY!"

**((QUICK, PUT ON YOUR 3D GLASSES NOW!))**

Ed is feeling very ill and he says, "my stomach feels weird from the soda, I'm gonna barf" Edna then shouts out, "NO ED! NOT ON THE READERS!" But then Ed swallows it up and says, "I think I'll hold on until I find a Bathroom!"

**((REMOVE YOUR 3D GLASSES NOW... Did you guys really want to see that?)**

**NEXT TIME: To those of you who think Edna is a Mary Sue, next chapter involves Edna (and this fanfic) getting a total makeover from three professionals, and you won't believe who they are.**


	33. Jumping the Shark

**Ed, Edd, Eddy, n Edna**

******エド エッド エディ エドナ**

**By Technomaru**

**Chapter 33: Jumping the Shark**

**Note: I do not own Ed, Edd, n Eddy...but "The Fourth Ed" and the Kimono Sisters... and brother is mine! Rachel belongs to Squeaken1 though and Jennifer belongs to yukimizuno... you know the rest for it doesn't matter anymore**

**This is a spin-off of "The Grim ED-ventures of Ed, Edd, n Eddy". I always wondered what if Edna existed in the "Ed, Edd, n Eddy" canon and...THIS STORY DOES NOT CONTAIN SUPERNATURAL ELEMENTS!**

**The fanfic has jumped the shark, so therefore the next chapter will be the last one before the reboot... I hope you understand. Also I've been busy with Courage Jr.**

**If this chapter is nonsense then give me a break for I had a hard time coming up with a conclusion.**

**(Summer, near the creek)**

The kids of Peach Creek decide to go swimming, and take a dip in the cool water in order to cool off.

Ed asks Eddy, "Umm, shouldn't we be a year older?" Eddy then says, "No.. no we're not... oh what's "Shovel-chin" doing now?" Edna then says, "I don't know but it looks like he has a girlfriend now and he seems to like it."

Kevin is seen kissing a beautiful Lee Kanker and Kevin says, "Well at least like, you ain't so bad at all Lee, now if you excuse me, I have a stunt to pull...

Amd with that Kevin peddles on his bike as hard as he can and his jumps over the creek and dodges the shark that is jumping over him.

Everyone but Ed, Edd, Eddy, n Edna were cheering.

But then from out of nowhere, patrol cars showed up and arrested everyone and Edna asks as she is being arrested, "Is it about the fact I'm considered a "Mary Sue"?" Then a cop replies, "No... worse! This fanfic jumped the shark!" May Kanker shouts, "I see adults everywhere... IT'S THE END OF THE WORLD!"

**(Peach Creek Court)**

The honorable CrossoverPrincess and Judge Emma goes to her seat and says, "Ed, Edd, Eddy, n Edna... You are charged with having this fanfic "jump the shark" and Edna is a Mary Sue... how do you plead?" Edna looks at her fellow Eds and then with a tear in her eyes she softly says, "Guilty!"

Judge Emma looks at her Juriors and asks, "What is the verdict?" Fellow internet trolls GerryBerry, SpiceyCoughdrop, Ichigogem DeathBorg-V3R, Egocentric Sharks, and *Zimadonna appear as jurors and they shout, "GUILTY!"

Judge Emma then looks at the Eds and says, "Sorry guys and I am a fan of the fanfic and show but I have no choice... I find you guilty and I sentance this fanfic to be cancelled... however as a fair judge, I will give you one more chapter to tie loose ends, case dismissed!" And she bangs the gavel on the desk. Judge Emma then says, "Next case... GerryBerry, SpiceyCoughdrop, Ichigogem, DeathBorg-V3R, Egocentric Sharks, and *Zimadonna! You are all guilty of being remorseless internet trolls and I sentance you all to eleventy billion years on the planet Saturn... with no parole!"

And soon the trolls are places on a rocket to Saturn.

Edna is crying becuase the fanfic is cancelled... but laughs at bit because the trolls are getting what's coming to them. Harvey Birdman then says, "Well at least I tried!" And then he flies away.

May hugs Edna and says, "At least we have one more chapter left... better make it worth it." Edna cheers up a bit and says, "Yeah, you're right, better make it worth it." Secretly, Judge Emma places a note on Edna's pocket.

**NEXT TIME: THE FINAL CHAPTER!**


	34. The Final Chapter

**Ed, Edd, Eddy, n Edna**

**Gh Gbh GfB Ghi**

**By Technomaru**

**Chapter 34: The Final Chapter**

**Note: I do not own Ed, Edd, n Eddy...but "The Fourth Ed" and the Kimono Sisters... and brother is mine! Rachel belongs to Squeaken1 though and Jennifer belongs to yukimizuno... you know the rest for it doesn't matter anymore**

**This is a spin-off of "The Grim ED-ventures of Ed, Edd, n Eddy". I always wondered what if Edna existed in the "Ed, Edd, n Eddy" canon and...THIS STORY DOES NOT CONTAIN SUPERNATURAL ELEMENTS!**

**The fanfic has jumped the shark, so therefore this chapter will be the last one before the reboot... I hope you understand. Also I've been busy with Courage Jr.**

**If this chapter is nonsense then give me a break for I had a hard time coming up with a conclusion.**

**Look for a reference to "Time Bandits" in this final chapter.**

The Eds are devestated. Edna then says, "I can't believe it, this fanfic is sentanced to be cancelled, I don't know if I can deal with this!" Eddy, "You tell me! Ever since you appeared you actually helped us succeed! Now that the fanfic is going to end, we're going back to being losers... are our readers sadists or something?" Ed replies, "You mean they kill cats and sacrifice them to the dark master of hades?" Double D replies, "No Ed, that's satanist, a sadist is someone who enjoys seeing others suffer as personal entertainment." Edna then says, "Well you just described Kevin, The Killer Sisters, and Internet trolls in 6 letters."

May Kanker then says, "Hello Edna, have you figured out how to end this chapter/story?" Edna replies, "Nope, however we must tie loose ends..."

**(And so...)**

The Eds and the Kimonos just came from seeing "The Human Spider" and they are horrified. Kasumi Kimono says to Ed, "Oh my, you sure have a weird taste for horror movies Ed." Ed replies, "At least it wasn't about three people being surgically sewed by..." Hikari covers Ed's mouth and she says, "Sorry but nobody wants to hear about a "Human Centipede" Ed!" Kitaro Kimono then says, "How about lunch at "Burgertime?" Then the Eds and Kimonos agree.

And so they got their burgers and the eight see May Kanker and her boyfriend Joe playing a 80's arcade game called "Neon Knome starring THE PROBLEM SOLVERZ" Edna then says, "I see you're spending your last chapter wisely my BFF!" May nods as she puts another quarter in.

Kasumi Kimono and Ed end up going to a store called "Things from another world" and she ends up buying the newest issues of "Tales from the Crypt", "Vault of Horror", "The Haunt of Fear", and "Creepshow". Kasumi then says, "Well I know you very well love, but what is going on?" Ed then says, "Oh this fanfic is going to get cancelled and so we're going to do what we always wanted to do." Kasumi then says, "Did Harold Camping make another prediction?"

Before she can do anything, they sees three very familiar girls, and one of them has a rather beaten up Don Patch in her arms. Ed sees them and shouts, "NO!"

The Killer Sisters sees Ed and Julie pulls out a switchblade and says, "Either you be my boyfriend or I'm going to cut you up!" Lindsay then says, "Or set you on fire! Hee hee hee!" Tara then adds, "They are one of those guys who got us sent to Juvie, let's do it anyway!"

Ed grabs Kasumi and they make a run for it.

Then they run to the Cul-De-Sac as Ed screams out,

"THE KILLERS ARE COMING!

THE KILLERS ARE COMING!

THE KILLERS ARE COMING!

THE KILLERS ARE COMING!"

Soon everyone in the Cul-De-Sac is panicking but then after Edna and May were doing some talking, May then says, "Waitaminute... this is our final chapter right? So if it's our final chapter we can do whatever we want." Lee Kanker then says, "Hey yeah, you're right... OK PEOPLE! PULLOUT WHATEVER YOU HAVE... AND LET THEM HAVE IT!"

As the Killer Sisters see the Kankers waving at them, Julie then says, "There you are... boy are we going to have some fun!" A invisible fairy holding a lit match appears before Lindsay and asks, "Hey Lindsay... are we gonna set them on fire this time?" Lindsay nods.

Lee Kanker then asks, "Before we allow you to beat us up, just answer this question... why do you three hate us so much?"

Julie then replies as she and her sisters pull out switchblades, "Well it happened back in the 50's our grandfather was one tough greaser and he was friends with your grandfather, during one rumble with rival greasers, the cops showed up, apparently Grandpa Kanker was so yellow he left our grandfather behind only to get arrested, aaaaand since then we Killers have a grudge against Kankers and seeing you covered in bruses and cuts is our way of avenging Grandpa Killer.

But then The Killers see Ed, Edd, Eddy n Edna, Kasumi, Hikari, Ryoko, and Kitaro Kimono appearing from the bushes and Edna shouts, "KIDS OF THE CUL-DE-SAC... ATTACK!"

Then Sara, Jimmy, Kevin, Rolf, Nazz, Johnny, Rachel, Jenny, and Joe pull out boards with nails on them and they surround the Killers. The Killers are sweating heavily as Julie says, "Oh no... this isn't happening... this isn't happening..." Lindsay shouts, "IT'S HAPPENING! ALL OF THE KIDS OF THE CUL-DE-SAC ARE GOING TO BEAT THE TAR OUT OF US AND I DON'T HAVE ENOUGH KEROSENE TO SET THEM ALL ON FIRE!"

And with that, Kevin grabs Julie and lets her have it, Rachel then bonks Lindsay and Tara's heads together, and then everyone dogpiles them and pummels them even harder. Soon enough, Mordecai and Rigby from "Regular Show" even join in on the fight, giving the Killers "Punchies". Edna then says to them, "Hey waitaminute, what are you two doing here?" Mordecai then says, "I read this fanfic and even I think they deserve this!" Rigby then adds, "Yeah, "Bully Bashing" is even more fun than "Strong Johns", and "Dig Champs"!" And with that, Mordecai and Rigby both go, "OOOHHH!"

After the beating is over, Marie asks Julie, "How do you like it when it happens to you?" Julie replies, "Not liking it at all..."

But then all of a sudden, and from out of nowhere, a trailer shaped like a whale drives in the middle of the Cul-de-sac. The trailer opens and it's revealed to be EDDY'S OLDER BROTHER!

Everyone is shocked and Eddy then says in horror, "Big bro... what are you doing here?" Eddy's older brother replies, "I'm here for a suprise visit "pipsqueak", and now here's your suprise beating!"

And so Eddy's older brother starts pounding him as he says, "Like old times huh "pipsqueak"... now say uncle!"

Double D, Ed, Edna, Rachel, Jimmy, Johnny, Nazz, Rolf, Joe Jenny, and Sarah, Kevin, the Kankers and the Kimonos are horrified by what they are seeing, Julie sees this happening and says, "Dude, what an "bunghole", at least I treat you three better." Kevin then adds," Yeah, and now I feel like such a "dork" and don't comment on my usage of "dork" again Edna!" Lee foams in the mouth and asks, "What is he doing to Eddy?"

Eddy then whimpers, "Bro, give it up." Eddy's older brother then replies, "Give it up? I thought you wanted to hang with your hero!" Eddy nervously replies, "I do, Bro, I do!" Double D then stands up and says to Eddy's older brother, "Mr. Eddy's Brother! As the older sibling, don't you think you should rather be setting an example for Eddy? And not, um... belittle him... in front of his... friends?

Eddy's older brother then replies, "Belittle? He's always been little! Hey "Pipsqueak, what's the deal with your girlfriend wearing that sock-head?" Double D replies, "Girlfriend?" Ryoko grits her teeth at this. Eddy's older brother then grabs Double D and also pounds him as well, then he grabs Ed as well. Edna then asks, "Isn't anyone going to help the Eds?" Everyone is too terrified to say or do anything. Then Eddy's older brother looks at Edna and says, "Looks like "Pipsqueak" and his friends are too tired, now it's time to play with you!"

The minute Eddy's older brother is about to touch Edna, another girl who looks alot like Edna shows up and delivers a "Megaton Punch" to Eddy's older brother's face which knocks him out, Edna smiles and says, "Emily!"

Emily is dressed like a police officer and says, "Hiya sis! I got a job in the force! And now that I see my ex-boyfriend for the creep he is, I'm taking him in, and I might as well take in those three since not only do they confess in stalking you but they escaped Juvenile Detention before their sentance was finished. So Edna hugs her sister as she arrests the four and takes them away.

Eddy recovers and then says... "I made it all up Ed, Double D, everyone. Everything I said about my brother was a lie. I made things up and acted like him, so everyone would like me. But boy was I wrong, I had no idea that acting like this for so long would cause me such trouble... when am I going to learn?"

Ryoko then smiles at him and says, "You just did Eddy..." as she kisses his forehead. Kevin then says, "Geez, no wonder why he always acted like this... yo... Sorry I always called you a dork n' stuff and... JAWBREAKERS ON ME!"

May then asks Edna, "So... are the loose ends tied up?" Edna replies, "I guess so hey wait NOOOOOooooooooooo!"

And with that, everything turns black and everyone vanishes except for Lee, Marie, May, Ed, Edd, Eddy, n Edna." Ed then says, "Whoa, it's dark in here!" Marie goes up to Edna and asks, "You're the smart one, what's happening?" Edna then says, "Well we tied up loose ends and so the fanfic is on the verge of it's cancellation, which means everyone we know and love will be no more, the Kimonos and other OCs don't exist anymore, stuff in the last few chapters never happened, it's all over... it also doesn't help that the show ended with "Ed, Edd, n Eddy's Big Picture Show".

May then asks, "Why are you still here Edna, you're a OC!" Edna replies, "I don't know and I hope it has nothing to do with me being a "Mary Sue".

Lee's "beautiful face" morphs back to normal but then she sees a note sticking out of Edna's pocket. She picks it up and she says, "Check this out Edna, it's a note that was written by Judge Emma from the last chapter." Edna reads it and says, "In case you get this letter, there is a way you and your friends can survive the cancellation... REBOOT IT!"

Soon the Kankers smile at this idea and May then says, "Yeah that's right, reboot it! I mean it worked for the Batman movies... can you picture "Joel Schumacher's Batman 5?"

**(Edna pictures Jimmy in a Batman costume, complete with nipples on the suit as he goes to a department store and buys a feathered boa with a "Bat-credit card".)**

Edna then says to them, "Brr... it's creepy, the way he bought that feathered boa with a... Bat-credit card!" Ed then shouts, "THE BAT-CREDIT CARD? THE BAT-CREDIT CARD! WHO WOULD GIVE BATMAN A BAT-CREDIT CARD!"

May hugs Ed and says, "Calm down Ed, when the franchise was rebooted, it became "Batman Begins" and it was awesome!"

**(Edna then pictures Ed as Batman and he beats up Double D dressed as Scarecrow, Eddy dressed as the Joker, and Kevin dressed as Bane.)**

Edna pulls out a map of time and space and says, "Well here's us and here's the time portal we enter in order to reboot our world." Double D then asks, "Umm Edna, where did you get that map?"

Before Edna can answer, a giant white head appears behind him as he bellows in a British accent, **"R-R-R-R-RETURN THE MAP! R-R-R-R-RETURN WHAT YOU HAVE STOLEN FROM ME!"**

May is shocked and shouts, "Oh snap it's the Supreme Being! You stolen his map didn't you!" Edna replies, "Well I have to in order to find the right time portal, run!"

And so the Eds and the Kankers decide to run from the Supreme Being, Edna then says to them, "This is it, we jump in it and everything will be rebooted, started from scratch!" and so she tosses the map back at the giant head as they jump into the time portal.

Edna then says to her friends, "Ok, we'll get this fanfic rebooted to the proper fanfic it's supposed to be, 20% more true to the original series, no OCs, no crossovers, time to get serious, and perhaps if we do a good job, internet trolls and mary sue haters won't get their panties in a bunch... I'm going to miss you guys!"

Edna then hugs the Eds and the Kankers as they eventually fade away... preparing for the reboot... a new beginning!

**THE END... ?**


End file.
